After dating for a few months, Twilight and Flash realize they aren't a perfect match. Twilight needs to find a way to move past her first heartbreak.
•based off Something Just Like This•
For The Friggin' Lunabra Contest
Chapters (6)
- Member Since 11th Jul, 2012
- offline last seen May 5th, 2023
fallen starr
How can I be home and still feel out of place.
fallen starr
Joined 11th Jul, 2012 ·
Offline
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wow. I really dislike this story!
why this don't have reason why twilight is stop date flash It just like there no story here!
I'm not quite sure what to make of this story. First Flash says "It's not you Twilight!" Then he says "It is you!" I'm sorry, but if you're going to have a couple break up, then you need to have a real reason. The it's not you it's me thing is really clique and it just doesn't work for this kind of thing, at least, not anymore. I do like how you describe things though, and while it feels out of place, the humor from Cadence was okay, just again, out of place. That and a few grammatical errors here and there, this isn't really that bad. In the end, you get a like from me.
8402558
Well, she stopped dating Flash bc she thinks he isn't seeing her, just an aggrandized version of her. Thanks you for letting me know why you didn't like it, since it will prevent the same mistake in the future.
8402804
I understand where you coming from. When I was writing it, I thought Flash's words would make sense from his perspective. He thinks he needs to change and do more to be worthy of Twilight. Mostly this part was based on the song Something Just Like This. I guess I just didn't do what I was hoping to. Thank you for the comment and letting me know what is wrong, and for the like. I'm also glad you liked my descriptions, since that is something I tend to struggle with and have been trying to improve upon.
8402863
I think it would probably help if you added a Based on the song, to the stories description. It would probably help make things less confusing. I know that I'm more inclined to like a story if I know what it's based off of.
8403776
I'll take that advice, thank you!
I really enjoyed this first chapter and I'm looking forward to seeing how Twilight works through this hurt and whom else see might decide to date. Or will thing turn out for Twilght and Flash?
I think some folks missed the meaning of what Flash was telling Twilight. He was trying to say she was the problem. He was saying he wasn't sure he had a place with her and he lacked the confidence to stand beside her. It sounds like he wants to be known as for himself, which is natural. But I think he's a bit jealous and intimidated by her, which isn't Twilight's fault, That is something that Flah has to work on and if he can't, thfn I say she is better off without him!
Be strong, girl!
8403944
Yes, that's it! He needs to see himself as good and not be scared of the shadow Twi casts. As for who Twi could potentially get with or if she has a future with Flash, well... I guess we'll see. And since I'm legit writing this off the cuff, there is no plan yet so I'm not even sure what may happen lol.
More background story for Luna.....Yay! Really liking this so far! Looking forward to the rest of the story!
Where can I read that story?
Man, this is a good story. Perharps, may I suggest something?.
There is time line theory that says King Sombra and Celestia married and had a daughter; maybe you could use this idea in Luna' s background story, but its only a suggestion.
Once again, nice story, and I am hoping to see how it ends.
P.S.: I vote for Flash+Twilight
8421348
Be prepared. This is as much Lunas story as it is Twilight's.
8421456
It's a song by The Chainsmokers.
8421474
Ah well, I do already know how I would like this to run, and sombra and Celestia having a child isn't one of them. That is an interesting thought, though. And thank you!
I'm really enjoying the character and world building in this story! I think Luna stops her story a bit eliberatly to keep Twilight interested and on edge.
This is my favorite part!
Good job keep on doing awesome!
8433197
Thank you! I'm rather proud of that part myself!
8433097
Now, why on Earth would Luna do that? Also thank you!
What's with the downvotes?
>two straight ships
>gud writing
>I'unno
Oh.
Keep going. I liked it when it was a one shot, but this is better...
8434985
I'm rather proud of it myself and I like what I have planned. I assume most of the hate comes from people seeing anything close to Flash x Twi and just judging from there so I'm trying to not let it bother me. Thank you very much, tho, for saying you like it.
8435184
Sure thing!
Wow! I never expected Luna's story to be so intense! She was really in love! I can't imagine the pain she felt when she realized he had changed and then in having to destroy him. It must have been heart-wrenching!
This story is great! The character building is awesome. I can't wait to see who is a Twilights door!
A part of me wanted them back together, yes. A loving reunion would have been sweet. But I think Twilight has to know the answer to the question Celestia asked her. If it's only wanting someone, then that is not love, that is loneliness. If it's that particular person, and the things that make them special, that you miss, then that I'd love, imho.
Great story! I really enjoyed it!
This was a very nice take on actual relationship problems, and Cady came across strong.
8452859
Thank you very much!
Candance gave Twilight some very sound advice. Things won't ever be the same between them, so just start again and see where it leads. He might be the one, or not, but you don't have to commit to forever right now. Just see where the relationship goes and see how you both feel.
Great story, Starr. Very emotional and very real. I was crying along wth Twilight!
Thank you for a very wonderful story!
8453243
Thanks so much for all the comments! I'm glad you like it!
This was beautiful. So many feels right now and such good advice for twilight. Keep up the good work, starr.
8531839
Thank you! Also, I like your icon.
Damn, I really, really liked this. I wish I could say more about it, but that'll all come when the judging for the contest has concluded. Your story has been the third i've read, and honestly, I have no idea which is my favorite yet. This story made me feel, and it gave such an amazing and detailed peer into Luna's past.
Damm, this is gonna be hard to decide, lol. Thanks for submitting this to the contest, and thank you for writing something so wonderful.
All of the dislikes are completely unfounded, if you were to ask me, and I don't think Flash's flip from 'its my fault' to 'its your fault' was unreasonable or unrealistic.
8733286
Thank you! I'm pleased you were able to enjoy it!