> Fairytale Bliss > by fallen starr > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Fairytale Bliss > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight swallowed, a burning feeling already constricting her throat. “What?” Her voice was tight, as if it was barely squeezed from her vocal cords. “What do you mean?” Flash Sentry wasn’t looking at her. He couldn’t seem to look at anything for long. His eyes landed on the soft grass, the fluffy white clouds in the sky, a butterfly going by. Anything that wasn’t Twilight. “I told you. This is a mistake. We’re not made for each other.” Twilight had never understood the hysterics ponies went into when broken up with until now. She could understand the want to eat a bathtub full of ice cream or to hide beneath blankets for days. “Why?” she asked, and how she hated the way her voice sounded. She hated the way that Flash closed his eyes in a wince, as if it hurt him as well. “I need to know what I did wrong, or what we did wrong. There—“ she squeezed her eyes closed and took a deep breath, trying to will away the burning in her eyes and the water that threatened to spill over. “There is a lesson in everything. If-if-if I learn, then I won’t make the same mistakes again.” As if to spite her, the tears she had managed to hold back fell as he looked at her. “Please.” Then Flash had tears in his eyes, too. “It isn’t you. That sounds like a line, I know, but it isn’t you, Twilight. It’s me. I’m not…you need a stallion who is better than I am. More.” “More? More what?” A small part of Twilight was glad they were in a secluded part of the Crystal Kingdom gardens, where no one could stare. Flash flailed a hoof around, as if looking for the words in the air. “I don’t know. More like you, I guess. You’re amazing, Twilight, and I’ve always meant that. But I’m not the superhero you deserve.” Twilight gave a short laugh. It held no mirth or amusement, but instead the sound of confused pain. “Superheroes aren’t real, Flash.” “You exist.” The garden was silent for a moment after that. Flash seemed shocked at his words and Twilight had stilled completely. “I’m not a super hero. I’m just a pony.” Flash stepped forward. “But you aren’t, Twilight. You defeated Tirek and Sombra, and you tamed Starlight and Nightmare Moon, and you’re an alicorn princess on top of all that. You’re the chosen one.” Twilight didn’t respond. Her tears had stopped flowing now, though her fur was mussed from wiping them away. Her wings hung limply by her side. “I’m not chosen. I’m not a superhero. I did what needed to be done, just like my friends, just anypony  else would have.” Her eyes drifted from his face to the ground. She took a deep breath, blinking rapidly. “I just want to love someone, Flash. I want someone to hold tight in the middle of the night. To kiss me. To miss when I’m away. I…” She looked up into his face, searching. “You have to get me off this pedestal you seem to have me on. I’m just a pony. I just want a pony that’s just a pony. Maybe…maybe you’re right. This was a mistake.” Tears were once more streaming down her face, though now she made no effort to hold them back. “Maybe some princesses weren’t made for happy endings.” She walked away slowly, wings hanging loosely by her side and head down. It wasn’t fair. Ponies never treated her differently until the exact moment that she needed them not to, and suddenly they did. She sniffed, but didn’t cry, as she made her way through the castle. No one spoke to her – or if they did, she didn’t hear them. In fact, it wasn’t until she was pushing open the door to her room that she heard anyone say anything to her at all. She pulled herself from her thoughts and saw Cadance standing before her. “Are you okay?” For half a second, the thought of saying yes and just going to sleep flited through her mind, but she wanted to talk about this. She shook her head and pushed the door to her room completely open. “Flash and I broke up.” Cadance, who had already looked concerned, flared her wings in surprise. “Oh, Twily, I’m sorry. What happened?” Twilight shrugged. She crawled onto her bed, Cadance settling next to her and wrapping her in a wing. It felt nice, warm, and she felt protected, like when she was a filly. “He thinks I’m more than I am. Like I’m some sort of great figure. I know I’m a princess. I understand that can be a barrier.” She brushed a tear away. “He thought I was some sort of superhero, Cady. Like I make it my mission to go out and save the world!” She threw her hooves wide, rolling her eyes at the phrase once it was out. “He broke up with me because, apparently, I’m too good for him. It doesn’t make sense.” She closed her eyes, pressing herself against Cadance, who tightened her grip. “I really liked him.” They sat in silence for a moment. Cadance stroked Twilight’s mane, feeling her slowly relax. After a time, she pulled away from Twilight. “I understand. Shiny once had me on a pedestal, you know?” “I lived with him.” Cadance nodded. “Right. It took him a while to see me for me, but when he did…Twi, he’s my husband now. We have a family. Maybe you and Flash Sentry just moved to fast. Maybe, if you extend your hoof in friendship, you can eventually pick what you were trying the last three months back up.” Then she got a devilish smile. “In the meantime, I can think of one or two ponies to help you get over him.” “That isn’t psychologically sound advice, you know.” Twilight fell back onto a pillow, with Cadance soon following suit. Cadance just shrugged. “It works. Honestly, I can have Hard Cut here in a second if you’d like.” “No, no.” They fell silent again. “I really liked him, Cady. I thought maybe we could be like you and Shiny. I think it’ll take me a little while to actually want to date again.” Cadance spluttered. “A while? I finally got you into romance, and now you’re backing out? Twi! I’ll give you a month, and I’m setting you up on a date!” With a gentle smile and a roll of her eyes, Twilight giggled. “Yeah, sure. Whatever makes you happy.” Twilight was surprised when Cadance once again draped a wing over her. “Seriously, though, I’m here for you. You’re my sister and I’ll be here whenever you need me.” “I think I just want to sleep,” Twilight said. Cadance gave a small smile and nodded. “Okay. I’m taking you to breakfast tomorrow. Be ready.” “I will be!” The door shut with a click, and Twilight sighed. Though she had no doubt she would be banishing these thoughts soon, tonight, she let the image play. First ‘I love you’s. Proposals. Marriage. Children. A life lived together. Casting a quick sound reduction charm, Twilight turned over in her bed. She tugged a pillow close to her middle and hugged it tightly, burying her face and muffling the sound of her tears. > Start to Finish > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- After three months and twice as many dates, Twilight was ready to be alone for the rest of her life. Cadance was trying to help, of course, but all these blind dates were only making her miss Flash Sentry more, not less. As much as Twilight loved Cadance and trusted her on matters of love, she was tired of trying to move on with someone else. She wrote Cadance a letter and she thanked Rarity, who Cadance had enlisted, but she would not be going out with anyone again for a while. She had been ready to lock herself in the palace library for the duration of the weekend, but after Spike brought her a letter from Princess Luna, she found herself in Canterlot. Evening had fallen already and Celestia had retired to her chambers. Luna was standing on her balcony, looking out toward the horizon. Twilight stepped out beside her, settling onto her haunches. The stars twinkled down, the round moon shining brightly, shimmering on the snow-covered rooftops below. Twilight shivered, pulling her wings in tighter. “Luna? You wanted to see me?” Luna turned to Twilight. “Let us go inside.” They settled onto large pillows that had been placed. Luna looked back to the window, seeming to see beyond the horizon. “Cadance has told me of your heart’s trouble. I have viewed your dreams. I thought, maybe, I could offer advice.” Twilight sunk into the pillow. “I don’t want advice,” she muttered. “Hm.” Luna looked about her chambers. “I understand heartbreak, Twilight. Mayhaps in a way that even Cadance does not.” Twilight looked up at her, her eyes barely visible behind her bangs. “Allow me to tell you a story. It was quite a time ago, shortly before I gave in to the Nightmare. My sister and I had received an emissary from the Crystal Kingdom…” “You’re certain this is a good idea?” Luna asked. “You’ve heard the whispers as well as I have, sister.” Celestia waved a wing as if to brush off Luna’s fears. “It will be fine, Lu. Come now, let’s meet the new King!” She trotted a few steps ahead of Luna, looking around and taking in all the sights. Luna hung back, eyes mistrustful. Twilight raised her head. “Are you sure you aren’t just painting this in a better light? Since we know how evil Sombra was?” Luna’s mouth drew into a line. “Positive, Twilight Sparkle.” The light in the room flickered for just a moment. Then Luna sighed. “Now, by your leave, I will continue.” Twilight sunk back down into her pillow and nodded. It was not as though Luna had no reason to be distrustful. She had heard from the shadows that something was not right with this new King, though Celestia would have none of it. Walking through empty streets and into the palace was eerie. The palace, once a place of bright splendor, was already darkening. Once Luna and Celestia was led to the King, however, Luna felt more at ease. “At ease around Sombra?” Twilight piped up. “What about the weird glowing eyes?" Luna sighed. “That was much later. I shall never get the message of this unfortunate tale across if you interrupt me every few lines. I thought a lover of stories such as yourself would be more quiet.” With a blush, Twilight once again shrunk back into her pillow and waved a hoof for Luna to continue. “Perhaps starting a little further on, then. We did not have trains then, so when we traveled, we left others in our stead and stayed for more than the short amount of times dignitaries visit today. We had planned for a month. The third day there, and I was enraptured with the Crystal Empire in a way that I hadn’t been in a long time. Celestia was doing what Celestia has always done best, but I, well, I really had no matter in the meetings. Or so I thought. You’ll remember, it was very shortly after this, only fifty years or so, before…” she trailed off and looked to the side. “At any rate, Celestia and I had traded stances. She was ready to flee back home while I wanted to stay. And that is what happened. I saw her off, and then.” Luna paused, a smile crossing her face. “Your sister is very mistrustful of me,” Sombra said as he dined with Luna. “I don’t know what it was that turned her away so quickly. From what I understand, our nations have always been closely related.” Luna paused, looking at her meal. “That is true. She was very excited to meet you.” “And yet, she goes and you stay to continue. If she were going to leave so soon, I would have thought she would allow you to participate in the discussions.” His black mane shined in the candle light, drawing Luna to look toward him. His eyes seemed to spark. Luna sniffed. “I do not need her permission to do anything. I am a Princess as much as she is. It is a diarchy.” “I’m sure that is what she tells you, but really, she seems to have all the power.” The napkin Luna help in her magic crumbled and fell with a soft thwump as the cloth hit the table. “Or perhaps you simply do not understand the way Equestria works. After all, you did just come to power. I will be retiring.” She walked away, ignoring his deep chuckles. The next few days he did not mention Celestia or Luna’s apparent lack of authority at all. Instead, he left her to her own devices, seeking her out at nightfall. She had just finished putting the moon in the sky when he appeared on her balcony and stared at the stars with her. He stood closer than was perhaps appropriate, but when Luna turned to ask him to move, she was struck by his treasured gazing at the stars. “I’m always amazed at this masterpiece,” he said softly. “Everything changes, turns softer. Better, some would say.” “Some?” Luna asked. “I would say.” He turned and looked at her, again his eyes gleaming. “I am sorry for upsetting you at dinner the other evening. I hope you’ll allow me to properly apologize.” In one daring movement, he put a hoof on her cheek. Luna swallowed and stepped back. Her heart was racing. “Tomorrow, we dine under the stars.” “As you wish.” She watched him slowly walk away, all thoughts gone from her mind. Twilight pushed herself upright, eyes wide. “You had a crush. On. Sombra. Luna, seriously?” Luna took a deep breath. “Perhaps that is enough for tonight. I do need to get to my dream watching duties.” “But it was just getting good! I want to know when you figured out he was just manipulating you." Luna blinked a few times before shaking her head. “It is time for you to sleep, Twilight. I will talk to you tomorrow night.” Not wanting to ignore a second dismissal, Twilight stood and left. On her way back to her quarters, she thought about everything Luna had said. Certainly, none of it applied to the relationship and break up she and Flash had, but maybe Twilight was the first person Luna could talk about it with for over a thousand years. She tucked herself into her bed, a frown on her face and a different kind of heartbreak in her chest. If Luna had really loved Sombra, she couldn’t imagine what it would have been like to keep it in for all that time. That night, her dreams were kept purposefully blank. > False Start > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Morning light peaked in the castle windows, the sunrays promising a bright, cheerful day. Though it was earlier than her normal wake-up time, Twilight found herself roused and ready to tackle what the day held. Her sleep that night had been deep – she couldn’t even remember her dreams! That was rare for her. With thoughts of smiley-face pancakes, she trotted off to the dining hall Celestia used for breakfast. There she was met, not with a soft smile and welcoming wing, but narrowed eyes and a grimace. Princess Luna sat at the table, seeming to glare at her breakfast. Celestia was nowhere in sight. Cautiously, Twilight ventured further into the room. With a sigh, Luna speared her fork through the middle of the stack of pancakes. “This is the eighty-second day in a row Celestia has made pancakes for breakfast. Out of those, I have had this same strawberry and banana combination twenty one. I am tiring of this ritual. Perhaps I should speak with her about the menu.” “Um, yeah!” Twilight knew she was a princess, that she was, even if only technically, equal to Luna. Still, she couldn’t help but feel the other mare astronomically outranked her. Being privy to any sort of personal information regarding any imperfection in Luna and Celestia’s relationship still sat her on edge. “You’re up late.” “Hm, yes. I wanted to continue our conversation from yesternight. I plan on ‘sleeping in’, as it were.” As if to emphasize the point, Luna yawned. “Now, I believe, as you said, we were getting to the good part.” Twilight blushed but nodded. “I’m sorry, I realize that is actually your life. I guess I got caught up.” The room was silent as Luna gathered her thoughts. Then she looked up at Twilight, a frown gracing her face. “You were concerned about manipulation. That was not the case with Sombra and I. It sounds strange to you, I know. You did not know him, only the clinging, greedy apparition that was left behind. He could have been good. He saw the darkness in me, I believe. At the very least, he saw the terrible rift already forming between Celestia and myself. It was some days after our starlit dinner. At that point, I had been in the Crystal Empire for nearly a month.” The day was sunny and bright and light filtered through the curtains in Luna’s quarters. After tossing a few more times and no less than three annoyed huffs, she finally left her bed. It would be a long night tonight, but getting up was better than being annoyed at the sun. She wondered the corridors, greeting the ponies who greeted her, looking for the grey coated unicorn. She found him at a desk with a small party of councilors. They hushed when she walked into the room, not that she could blame them. She would not wish to divulge all secrets to an ally either. “Ah, Luna.” Sombra’s eyes sparkled and his frown flipped up into a smile. “It is early yet for you to be awake.” He quickly dismissed the ponies around him. Once they were alone, he sat back in his chair. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” “The sun,” Luna answered. Sombra laughed. “Ah, yes. No matter, stronger curtains will be hung in your sleeping quarters. However, this is the perfect time for us to discuss something.” Luna’s ears perked up and she straightened her back. “What is it?” He sat completely still for a moment. Then, with a sharp intake of break, he leaned forward. “I have enjoyed your presence in my home over the last month. We are very similar, you and I.” He paused, swallowing. “I thought, perhaps, we could find something better than this treaty we are working out.” Luna’s heart was fluttering. Small remarks and gentle touches aside, this was the first time Sombra had vocalized his intent. “What better way?” Luna asked, and she thanked the goddess that her voice did not shake. “I thought we could join our nations through marriage. It would be a boon to both and, forestalling any major grievances, we could have total control of trade. Between the two of us, we produce everything ponies need to survive.” Politics. Plain, boring, logical. “I understand your desire to strengthen your country, Sombra. However, I believe I will decline the offer. Equestria stands in a golden age of its own currently.” She swallowed. “My month’s stay ends tomorrow. I will sign our treaty as it stands.” Sombra tapped on the table with his hoof.” “Wait,” Twilight leaned forward, her half eaten pancake forgotten. “I thought you said he wasn’t manipulating you? It sounds like he was.” Luna closed her eyes and let out a long sigh. “He loved me, Twilight Sparkle. However, I am tired. We shall finish my tale tomorrow.” Then she stood and walked out, Twilight watching after her. With a shrug, Twilight finished her breakfast and decided to wonder to the castle. She didn’t think of any particular place, but her hooves took her to the public portion of the palace gardens. There she sat beneath a tree, watching foals throw snowballs at each other. She tried to ignore the couples roaming the frosted landscape, but soon found her mind wondering what it had been like to be friendly with Sombra. Had he been genuinely warm toward her? How much affect did he have on Luna become Nightmare Moon? When did he turn dark? Why hadn’t his love stopped him from turning dark? If he knew she and Celestia were growing apart, why didn’t he try to fix it? With a concentrated look, Twilight teleported a notebook and pen to her side and began writing notes on the story and the questions she had. This was supposed to help her, but so far, she hadn’t seen where this story aligned with the relationship between Flash and herself. After all, Flash wasn’t a new leader. Flash had never even dealt with the temptation of dark magic. He had never had to come up with a plan for a treaty. Those were all things Twilight had done. She frowned. A new page in her notebook was quickly written with Twilight – Sombra and Flash – Luna? Was she meant to be Sombra in this story? After a moment, her head hit her hoof. “Of course not. These are real events. Luna is just trying to help me, not give an allegory.” With a sigh, she poofed her notebook back to her bedside table and stood, shaking out her legs. She was just considering what to do next when her stomach grumbled. “Lunch it is, then.” She trotted off toward the food district. She knew just the café she wanted to go to. The wind picked up on the way there, preparing for the snow storm the pegasi had planned for later that night > A Late Night Breakfast > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The more Twilight thought, the more she needed to know what had happened between Sombra and Luna. Surely, her leaving then couldn’t have been all of it. Luna had been smitten, certainly, but in love? No, not then. Not when she left his castle. If that was all, there was no advice. Was Luna going to tell Twilight to do whatever version that time had of wallowing in pity and ice cream? It seemed so unlike Luna, and yet the thought kept coming back. She had to know. So when Luna, eyes wide and wings half flared from surprise, closed the main doors to her chambers, Twilight sat, notebook held aloft in her magic. Her tail twitched as Luna sighed. “Good evening, Twilight.” “I’ve been thinking about everything with you and Sombra,” Twilight started, but Luna held up a hoof. “Not yet. First, I need coffee. And a pastry.” The walk to the kitchens was a short, quiet one. Luna didn’t say a word as she watched the coffee make or as she selected her pastry. She didn’t even glance at Twilight as she found a suitable place to sit – which happened to be one of the servant break tables. It wasn’t until Twilight had managed to sit, with her own pastry and coffee, that Luna even relaxed. “Very well, I suppose now is as good as later.” Her horn glowed and a box appeared on the table. Twilight reached for the box, but Luna stopped the lid from lifting with a heavy hoof. “Not yet.” “Sorry.” Twilight withdrew her hand. The box, now that she took the time to really notice it, was wide and tall. The color had faded, though it was apparent that it was a highly treasured object. The lid and sides held an emblazoned cutie mark – that of a broken crown. Luna stroked the box gently, gazing at it as if it were a lost treasure. “Sister kept this safe for me. She never once opened it to look inside. I later shared what is within it with her, after my return.” She looked up at Twilight, the pain haunting her eyes making Twilight’s breath catch. “You will be the fourth person in all of time to know what is in this.” As eager as she had been earlier, Twilight stilled. She took a deep breath to settle the rumbling in her stomach. “Luna,” she said softly, looking up so their eyes met. “You don’t have to show me this. It’s important to you.” Luna smiled. “You are important to me. This…this is a relic of a bygone era. A time, a place, events that will never happen again. You, you are present. You are here, with me, now. This is important. You are more.” She shifted, ruffling her wings, and cleared her throat. “I simply wish to choose what it is that you see of this. Some are not pertinent to your situation and the language is archaic. I do not wish for something to be lost in the translation.” Twilight swallowed and nodded her head. “Okay." Without any great ceremony, Luna lifted the lid with her hoof and gently floated a piece of parchment out of the box. “I told you I had left, yes? Well, Sombra soon realized his mistake.” Dear Princess Luna, I hope this letter finds you well. “You won’t mind, I trust, if I simply skip the pleasantries?” Twilight shook her head. “No, of course not.” With a nod, Luna looked back to the letter. In my request for your hoof, I made a grave error. I know how you seek to show your sister that you are her equal. That your stars, your night sky, shines just as beautifully as her day. That there is worth and beauty to be had in the dark. I mistook you desire to shine and for that, I payed the price. Let me expound upon my offer. What I said remains true. I did not, however, tell you the boon my kingdom would receive. That I would receive. A mare, whose mane flows and sparkles even in the darkest of shadows. A smile that shines brighter than any sun could imagine. A laugh, a beauty, a mare surpassed by none. I only told you of those boons to your country. Imagine what a Princess such as yourself could accomplish as a Queen. Luna cleared her throat. “Sombra had a way with words. I had shared much of my inner turmoil with him, and he had cared. I wanted nothing more but to join our two great nations. Celestia…did not approve. She told me vicious lies about him. Or so I thought. I received many letters such as this, each more grand than the last. Until they stopped.” This had been Luna’s fastest reply yet. Was he now taking his time to compose another letter, or had hers been lost? Each day she eagerly awaited any incoming missives, and every day, she was disappointed. It was already a week out of the longest time she had waited before. In a flurry of rash decisions, she dashed to the Crystal Empire. She should have written ahead, alerted Sombra that she was approaching, but she didn’t. They were to be wed soon, after all. Celestia stopped her before she left Equestria. The fight they had was terrible. In front of the guards, in front of whatever citizens were nearby, in front of everypony, they yelled and screamed and, ultimately, came to blows. “I am not a child, Celestia, I rule this country the same as you!” Luna’s throat burned. Tears streamed down her face and her breath came in ragged gasps. “Let me go! At least he loves me!” Celestia froze for a moment, as if shot by ice, before her rage flamed. “Let you go and destroy everything we have built? He doesn’t care for you anymore than he cares for his people. We have to secure Equestria, not tear it down and darken it.” Then Luna punched Celestia. Twilight pressed her hoof to her mouth as giggles spilled around it. “I’m so sorry,” she said. “It’s just the way you said it. ‘Then I punched Celestia.’” Luna smiled back. “It is alright, Twilight. We did come to serious blows and I was dragged back to the castle and detained. It took a fortnight for me to convince Sister that I would not try to run to the Crystal Empire again. I did accuse her of taking my letters, but she assured me she wasn’t. I believed her. Even to this day, I believe he knew I would not like what was occurring, and stopped writing me.” The jovial mood turned bitter. “So that’s it? You just stopped talking?” “Not exactly.” It had been months since Luna had last heard from Sombra. Her hear ached every moment. She left her bed only to stop Celestia from being right. Then her chance came to escape the confines of her duties. The rulers of Fawyn had invited several dignitaries and rulers to attend a peaceful engagement party for their eldest daughter. Celestia was attending, of course, and Luna decided she would as well. There was a ball the first night. Celestia was dancing with a lovely reindeer by the name of Dancer. Luna, however, despised the ball. No one had asked her to dance. Until she heard a voice behind her. “Mayhaps the princess would honor me with her hoof?” Her insides froze. She turned to see him with red cloak and large crown upon his head. He looked more kingly than she had ever seen him. She hated it. Her nose wrinkled as she took him in. then she caught his eyes. Gone was the sparkling, beautiful pink. Instead, they had darkened to a deep, ferocious red. She felt her throat constricting as she took a step back. “Sombra?” She took another step back. “You’ve let your darkness consume you.” “You knew then?” Twilight said. “Just like that?” Luna nodded. “Indeed. And it enthralled me. He told me of the power that came with it. What he could do. How he was stronger, able to fully and resolutely lead his people. I did not flinch away from it at all. Sister, however, did. We talked for quite a while, but when she saw us, she was by my side. Pulling me away.” Luna swallowed. “I feel she knew more of my struggles that I will ever be aware of. After that, reports came from people who were escaping the Crystal Empire. And so we removed him from power, but not before he removed the Crystal Heart. The Empire was lost for a thousand years.” The room was silent, half eaten pastries and long emptied coffee cups sitting on the table between the two mares. Then a thought struck Twilight. “Luna, I’m really sorry, but I don’t understand how this helps me with Flash?” Luna looked up, her mouth falling open slightly. “The point was that sometimes your partner sees and knows parts of you that you do not know. You should go and help him, Twilight, just as you should allow him to help you.” “That’s not what I got from that at all.” Twilight opened her notebook. “I guess I can see that, but we don’t need to help each other.” Luna leaned forward. “Are you certain?” “I’m sorry,” Twilight said. “I’m very grateful that you shared your story with me, though.” “Of course.” Luna studied Twilight for a moment before sighing. “Now I must attend my nightly duties. Good luck, Twilight.” Twilight nodded. “Thanks, Luna.” She wondered to her quarters and lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Her eyes slowly closed as her mind drifted, mixing thoughts of Luna and Flash and Sombra and herself. Hours later, she sat up in a daze, still angry at Flash for turning Luna into Nightmare Moon. A loud pounding on her door distracted her from those thoughts. Still half asleep, she walked toward the door, opening it with her magic. As the door swung open, she felt her heart stop. > Library Time > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Flash Sentry stood on the other side, and for a moment, she was angry at him again. Then she blinked away the dream, and became angrier. “What are you doing here?” She managed to keep her words even, despite the emotions rising inside. He stood, rooted to the spot, his mouth moving but no sound coming out. “Flash, please, just say something.” “I’M SORRY.” They both winced at the volume, Flash biting his bottom lip as his face turned red. “I’m sorry, Twilight. I messed up. I’ve.. I’ve done a lot of soul searching.” His eyes moved from her to the floor. “Like I said, it wasn’t you, it was me. I’m an idiot, though, because if anyone can help me get over myself, it’s you.” Twilight frowned. “What are you talking about?” Flash flattened his ears. “Can we…can we find somewhere a little more suitable to talk?” Twilight nodded, walking out and shutting the door behind her. “How about the library?” “Okay, that’s perfect!” He trotted along beside her in silence. When Twilight would look at him, he would quickly look away. The trip to the library was short and before much time had passed, they were sitting across from each other at a table. Flash tapped his hoof on the hard wood while Twilight looked at him. Once again, her thoughts were drawn to any comparison between the relationship of Luna and Sombra and that of Flash Sentry and herself. Finally, he stopped tapping on the table and took a deep breath. “I broke up with you and said it was because you’re so perfect.” “I’m not perfect, Flash,” Twilight said, her voice pained. He nodded. “I know that. I do. But when I stood next to you, when I looked at me and then I looked at you, it was too much. I couldn’t understand what you saw in me. I didn’t like what people thought when they saw us together. I felt like a blip.” He took another deep breath. “I started to resent all of the wonderful accomplishments you’d had. What kind of boyfriend does that, Twilight? What kind of pony resents the success of someone they love.” He swallowed, meeting her eyes. “Well, not a colt fit for a princess, that’s for sure. That was what I was thinking. I wasn’t thinking of you at all. I was selfish, thinking of only myself.” His hoof twitched, then he leaned forward, holding her hoof. “That was so wrong of me. I could have talked to you. I should have talked to you. Because if you can’t talk to the person you’re with about your inner demons, then you’re probably with the wrong person. I thought about what you said. How you just wanted something like what we had. And Twilight, I want it back.” Twilight sat, looking at their hooves. He wanted to be with her again, and her heart swelled to hear that. Yet her brain yelled at her, asking what would happen the next time she has a great accomplishment. She thought of all the failed dates she had been on. Of the times she spent alone, wishing he were back beside her. Then Luna. And Sombra. The point was that sometimes your partner sees and knows parts of you that you do not know. Did Flash know her? Did she know him? She licked her lips, unchecked tears slowly rolling down her face, and shook her head. “I’m sorry, Flash. I don’t know. I need time to think. Process everything.” She cleared her throat and looked directly at him. “You hurt me. A lot. I’m just getting better and I don’t know if I can handle this again. Just give me time.” His hopeful expression fell. “Oh. I—“ Then he nodded. “Okay, princess, if it’s time you need, it’s time you’ll have. I’ll be waiting to hear from you.” Then he stood and walked out, slowly, looking back several times at Twilight, sitting quietly and staring at the table. Evening sunlight was streaming through the windows of the library, dust softly floating through the air. Twilight watched with unseeing eyes. Already she had cried over not saying yes twice, and then vindicated herself by believing no was the right choice. She was lost in a sweet moment of thoughtlessness when soft hoof steps broke through to her ears. Her ears perked up as she saw the comforting white wing spread in offer. She all but ran to Celestia’s side, nuzzling into her as she was enveloped in the wing. “I hear Flash Sentry came to see you today.” Twilight nodded. “He did.” “And what came of that meeting?” She looked down at Twilight with a soft, comforting smile on her face. Twilight shook her head. “I don’t know. I don’t even know what to say to him. It’s all so confusing now.” With a feather, Celestia brushed away an escaped tear. “Oh, my little pony, I am sorry. First love is so hard.” Twilight nodded. “All the advice in the world isn’t going to help you, I’m afraid, if you don’t know what you want for yourself. What is it that you miss? Flash Sentry, or having a special somepony?” After letting the question sink in for a moment, Celesita sighed. “Unfortunatly, only you know the answer to that. And I must speak to my sister before she runs off to speak with you more. She has been very worried about you.” “Why?” Celestia stood for a moment as still as a statue. “She still misses him. Not what he represented, not the having of a pony there, but everything they shared. She does not wish you the same fate. Nor do I.” After another silent moment, Celestia turned and left. Twilight stood, stretching herself. It had been a long few hours since she had last stood. Finally noticing the rumbling in her stomach, she made her way toward the kitchens. There she could find her first meal of the day and maybe even a certain broken-hearted princess. > Realization > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just as suspected, Luna was in the kitchens pouring herself a cup of coffee. Her eyebrows rose slightly, showing her surprise. “I did not expect to see you again so soon.” Twilight gave her a sheepish look as she picked out a cereal. “Flash came to see me today.” Luna gave her an appraising look. “Did he?” “Yeah.” She swallowed. “I’ve been a little out of sorts because of it. Celestia gave me something to think about, too. A question that I don’t know the answer to.” Now Luna looked toward the pastries, eyeing each with scrutiny. “Is that so?” “It is.” Twilight bit her lip for a moment before taking a deep breath, plunging the spoon she had been holding into her now full bowl. “Will you tell me more about Sombra? Your relationship, I mean? How did you fall in love with someone you had known for such a short amount of time?” The chosen pastry floated ahead of Luna, along with the coffee, as she made her way to the same table the pair had used previously. “I believe something has been misunderstood. I visited Sombra more than that month long stay. It wasn’t until Sister discovered our romantic inclinations that she disapproved. Despite her misgivings, she was still upholding the treaty our nations had signed.” “Oh.” Twilight licked her lips and looked down at her bowl of cereal. “I thought you had the two meetings, once for the treaty and once as the party, and the letters.” Luna chuckled. “Let me tell you of my favorite time,” Luna said. “It was summer in the Crystal Empire, and the Empire, and it was at its peak under Sombra’s rule. Everything glistened like bright sunlight after a rainshower…” The meadow, if it could be called that, was a small place in the palace gardens. The public was prohibited from visiting this part, so on a warm, sunny afternoon, Luna and Sombra stole away. No meetings, nothing to rule, not a worry that wasn’t each other. They were just two ponies. They sat, her dark blue coat pressed against his grey one, with small serene smiles on their faces. Most days didn’t have a minute to afford spare time, let alone whole half-days, but this had been a special arrangement. After a time, he stretched and laid in the sun, eyes closed. Luna brushed the fur of his cheek. “This is what we should have always.” He opened his eyes a sliver to look at her. “Time to be together.” He sat up took her hoof, holding it to his cheek. “So long as the stars twinkle and the moon looks down with a smile, we shall be together. Eternally.” He leaned in and rested his forehead against hers. “Soon, you will be Queen. Soon, we will be an unstoppable force, and who could tell us not to steal away like this?” Then he pulled away, looking deep into her eyes. “I love you, Princess Luna of Equestria, Mistress of the Moon and most beautiful mare in the world.” Her cheeks burned with a blush. “I shall tell sister of our plans upon my return.” “I have already told you how sister reacted upon discovering my plans and how eventually I stopped receiving letters.” With a sigh, Luna shook her head. “Looking back on my memories, I can see clear signs of the path he was treading. I was blinded, at the time, to it. Sometimes I feel that if I had married him, his fall would not have happened. Nor mine. Ripping us apart, as Sister did, tore the wound that was starting to heal. There is simply no way to know.” Luna shook her head, clearing away her introspection. “I do apologize, Twilight. I do not believe I can help you with this matter anymore.” Twilight sighed. “Relationships are as messy and unpredictable as friendships, it seems.” “So it does.” “Celestia found me in the library after a couple bouts of crying and subsequent self-assurance over sending Flash away. I still have to give him a firm answer. She gave me some advice.” Luna leaned forward. “What was that?” “She asked if I wanted Flash Sentry or if I wanted a special somepony.” Twilight stared into the remnants of milk in her bowl. “I don’t know the answer.” Twilight looked up when Luna took her hoof. “I believe, Twilight, that is answer enough.” The desk in her castle was littered with crumpled bits of parchment. Small piles of them fell around the desk and onto the floor. When you could see a word, it was crossed through, or tear stained, or otherwise difficult to read. Twilight sat, eyes rimmed red, staring at the blank parchment in front of her. “I don’t know what to write,” she whispered. “I don’t want to do this.” She turned her watery eyes to the only other pony in the room. Cadance gave her a small smile. “Then don’t, sweetheart. No one said you had to give it up.” “Celestia was right. I don’t want him back. I just want what the relationship provided.” She swallowed. “I also don’t want to hurt him.” Cadance rubbed Twilight’s back for a moment. “Do you remember when you were just a filly? You were really upset because you couldn’t find Smarty Pants so we went to the store to buy you a new doll. Do you remember what you said?” Twilight nodded. “None of them were my Smarty Pants, so none of the others were good enough.” “Ding-ding! What a smart little filly.” Cadance ruffled Twilight’s mane, the other mare swatting at her hoof. “So maybe you want a special somepony. Why can’t Flash fill that role? Maybe you’ll get to where it needs to be him, and maybe you won’t. You didn’t have a doll again until we found your Smarty Pants and, while you did scold her for running away, you still took her back.” “This is a real pony, Cady.” Twilight let her head hit her desk. Cadance brushed Twilight’s hair away from her face. “Do you know how Shiny finally convinced me to say yes?” Twilight frowned. “Did you ask him out?” “That is not the point. Writing a letter from the heart. Saying what you feel, whatever that might be, whatever sort of confused mixed-up-ness is in there, just put it out there. Tell him everything. Tell him you’re unsure but you want to try. Or that you don’t want to risk it and would rather things stay as they are now.” Her voice lowered, softening. “It won’t ever be like it was during those three months again so it can’t hurt to at least try.” “Okay.” Twilight nodded, sitting up and clearing away all but the one parchment on her desk and the quill, gripped tightly in her magic. “Okay.” Dear Flash Sentry,