Big Macintosh finally finds the courage to pursue the mare of his dreams with a gentle nudge or two from some friends. But will the hustle and bustle of the Royal City be too much for the humble farm-pony? TwiMac.
Cover image by xXHazukiXx on deviantArt.
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A very nice start, and loved the bit at the end, was a nice bit of situational hilarity
cant wait for more
I really want to see more of this! Really quite well done! +5 internet point sir or madam
oh god this is exellent, really looking forward to see what is going to happen, keep up the good work friend
Fantastic so far. We can always have more TwiMac!
Ok this is great, do go on cause even if you don't i'll continu reading this (how i don't know i'll find a way)
P.S. From this moment fort i'm watching you
Ahahaha! Excellent punchline, good sir! This story is off to a great start, I do think!
Go get 'er, Macintosh!
Quite the amazing start! You captured everyponys personality perfectly, and the bit with rainbow dash at the end was priceless. Yet another story for me to track. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Great start, I can't wait for more!
That was a very good read. I like how Mac was handled in this fic by finding a nice balance between intelligence, conversation skills and a humble attitude. I think everyone knows who Mac is going to meet in Canterlot as far as his guide is concerned: Fancy Pants. Oh and kudos for having Braeburn run for Mayor of Appleloosa.
As for the spa, guys don't knock it till you've had a full body massage and a pedicure and just spent about an hour soaking in warm water. You'll never feel better than after you leave.
Peace Out.
Quick comment, everyone-
Thanks to all of you who've read, voted, left feedback, etc. I admit, I was truly nervous how this would be received... I'm just getting over a five year long bout of writer's block, and this is my first story in the MLP-verse, so yeah, little bit of trepidation! But seeing all this def makes me feel welcome!
This is going to get good I can feel it
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thank you for the kind comments! I'm glad you were pleased with the characterization... I think I had Mac talking quite a bit in the first part, but that was a matter of him being with his sister, alone, and... probably getting a bit tipsy. AJ knew what she was doing. I did try to make sure to reign him back in a bit in the later bits with Rarity and such.
...Mac will never admit he liked the spa... until I force him to....
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I love the bit with Dashie... it just came to me out of the blue (no pun intended) as I was searching for a nice "zing" to wrap things up. A pal had commented that she loves it when Dash gets wrapped up in being the center of the entire universe, and totally misinterprets things. And... yeah, why wouldn't Mac have a crush on her, amirite?
I mean, look at that face!
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Oh and I forgot to mention earlier... Fancy Pants may NOT be the pony that meets Mac at the station (or he might be, who knows?) but don't be surprised if he makes an appearance, no matter what else happens. Possibly Fleur too.
Absolutely love it and I can't wait for more. I also believe I busted a gut at the final scene
Fantastic my good sir.
I believe this will be good.
:eeyup.
How long will be the wait until the next chapter?
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I've been weighing the merits of Long Chapters vs. Frequent Updates... I've been working on the second chap a week or so (working around, well, work, and real life, etc,) and I'm up to about 4k words, and I'd say it's maybe a half to two-thirds done... For one thing, I had a guest appearance show up that I wasn't anticipating, but I think it's going to be really, really fun (I get my best ideas while bored at work.) There's an ending scene that might maybe get bounced to the next chap (not a bad thing, as that chap really is vague at this point, anyway.) I really do want this thing to be as good as I can get it. I'd say TENTATIVELY a week to ten days before posting. (Do not hold me to that, please! I'm trying to be careful and make this thing as good as it can be... new fandom for me and I'm trying make things good as I can make them!)
Your patience is appreciated, and I shall endeavor to reward it!
Love it! five stars two thumbs, ect. Can't wait to read more.
815870 A week or more? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Redheart_gasp.png But I want my shipping nao! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Pinkie_loool.png
That's the right attitude.
Now this is a story I must see continues! *Eagerly favorites and thumbs up and awaits updates*
Eeyup.
I don't know what it is about today, but I'm feeling really Twimac shippy. Thankfully I found this wonderful story, that I had intended to save for later to read while I piled up a decent number of stories to read through... but then my clicking finger had other ideas. I mean, one thing lead to another, and suddenly I was staring at a big ol' wall of text that I couldn't stop reading for the life of me.
You got my thumbs, you got my track/favorite, adn now it's time to play the waiting game.
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Thanks so much! Chapter two is in progress and... yep, looking to be another wall of text, so far. Working on it around work (I mean, the kind of work that pays bills,) sucks, but I'm still looking to post by the end of next week at the latest (barring disaster, and if the beta-readers tell me it doesn't suck,) so hopefully the wait won't be too long!
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Yay~
That's all I can say to that. I love long chapters in fics. some of my favorites have chapters as long as 14k words.(Duties is a good example, if you've ever heard of it). Not to say that it's a need for a good story, but I like lots of content, and from what I've seen of your comments, the next one won't disappoint. I'm glad I'm a patient man. Good Luck!
Hey, I figured out how to comment!
This story would be cute even if I didn't know the ponies behind it. There's a whole lot of heart, here, and a lot of adorable behind-the-scenes girl-talk that most guys would never understand. (You have special privileges, m'dear, and just see what fiction can result!) A lot of guys never can write something biased from a female perspective. You blow that notion out of the water here with giving a good sense of what the mares are thinking.
And Mac! This is proof right here that the show should give him more attention. He's quiet, sure, but that doesn't mean that he's quiet between the ears.
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I love being one of the girls!
Thanks, though. Seriously, I was concerned about that. But I have great lady-friends who can give me little peeks behind the curtain. I am very, very privileged indeed!
And it's very good to see you on here, you're going to make a lot of ponies very happy with your work!
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You get quite a bit of the partial credit for the monster that is going to ensue, you know, but it's been that way for ages! I hope the next chapter starts again for you soon. Because it's awesome and I'm going to have to start on Google Docs, it's fun to watch the process.
MOAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh Celestia
I love the interaction between Twilight and Big Mac. And the train scene.
This is a-d'awww-able.
Update YAY!!
Figured Celestia would catch on quickly. Loved the scene with Mac and Trixie and can't wait for Mac to meet Shining, that will defiantly be good especially if Shining catches on to Mac's feeling for Twilight.
Oh Applejack, plans within plans within plans. This was a really good chapter, the part with Trixie was unexpected but welcomed.
Sometimes, the conspiracy of mares is so vast, all a stallion can do is throw up his hooves in surrender and hope for a negotiated peace.
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I'd love to see that too!
Love the story! It fantastic how in character they all are!
This story is way too charming, with everyone in it conspiring to bring Mac and Twi together (well, except Trixie.) Really well done, and I look forward to more!
Well, Big Mac, looks like at least 5 of the mane six AND Celestia are conspiring to get you together with Twilight. You're screwed.
I am seriously liking this fic, my friend. Thumbs up, thumbs up.
a brilliant chapter. I enjoyed the first, but I found the characterizations here top-notch. Technically sound and I particularly enjoyed the Trixie scene. This chapter has catapulted me from merely contented to actively excited for what is to come.
Keep up the excellent work.
I think I feel in love with Mac just a little bit more! He didn't have to help Trixie but he did and I love him for it! Well done can't wait for the next chapter!
nice chapter
Wow...so amazing,so well written,so interesting... I must favorite and like!!!!!!! 10/10 and trixie being showed isn't bad,it leaves to door to conflict open...if you get what I mean...
Can't wait for more, an excellent story.
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Yeah, I'd love to see that myself... and there's a good chance we will!
Awesome story so far. I'm personally hoping for some conflict. What's a good love story without a little competition going on for Twilight's heart?
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The Trixie bit came to me in a flash while totally bored at work, and I blasted it out in one sitting the next day (unusual for me, that's not how I usually work... typically, I write rather deliberately.) I'm really happy with the response to it so far. We MAY not have seen the last of Trixie... and we def haven't seen the last guest appearance. And yes, Mac is a great pony... he'd not turn his back on a pony in need, even Trixie.
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...mmmmmaaaaybe!
Seriously, I have an over-arching plan for this, but much of this is all still very malleable. But it's up for consideration, for sure.
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Yeah that's what I did in my short story 'For those we love . . .' You should read it, lot of other people seem to like it. I know I'd appreciate it
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I shall put it on the list! (Helping one of my newly-minted pegasister friends plan her debut story in pony-dom at the moment.) But I will definitely give it a look, and I thank you.
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Cool, be sure to pass the word around when it's up so we can go read it!
Hopefully it's another TwixMac story