After Discord learns about the fate set for Equestria, he can't help but do something drastic. After all, Fate and Chaos are like water and oil; they'll never get along. Let's see what happens when an extra character is introduced at the beginning!
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Every time your stories update I get this big-ass grin. Keep'em coming and I'll keep from coming on you. :3
No one likes being told they're doing something stupidly... I just know this is going to ball out of control once the nobles get involved. We can't depend on Blueblood, but I'm sure he has an ancester who's just as pigheaded as he is...
7050821 Oh it will. Max hasn't been around long enough to piss in anybody's oats yet, but I know it's going to happen. He's probably also going to be wanted by several ponies for 'sullying a goddess' among other things.
While all of the references I checked said that "yon" and "yonder" are more or less interchangeable, it's been my experience that it feels more natural to stick to "yon" when you need an adjective. (ie. treat "yon" as the "my" to yonder's "mine")
Sister's.
Fricken first sentence dude :D.
Lemme read the story and then I'll go typo-hunting.again
Wasn't Lulu wearing some blackish stuff? (And purple-blueish booties?)
Unnecessary "a"
Isn't it "thine"? This is a geniue question.
You are definetly improving. I'm reading Substitute again, and the difference in the number of mistakes is quite visible. Also, in the first half of Asylum (didn't read the rest, I just didn't find it interesting)
Don't know who said it was moving to fast, but I say its not in any way. The reasons you stated were the very reason why its moving at this speed.
nice story so far, lets hope it doesn't like adapt and overcome 2, damn I really liked how that one started
In which a Changeling flat out tells a guard that he's wasting his time...
I love this one; about time Luna got the love she needs to stop her becoming Nightmare.
Woohoo!
I wonder if Max will get to see Luna's battle-magic. There is the depiction of her as an active warden of the night against physical threats.
Perhaps a sparring session to help the royals rebond as sisters?
No changeling tag?
7051050
She defiantly had da booties in dat badonkadonk.
Love the story keep them coming
Max is a little preachy, and ponies seem to listen to him even while insulted by what he is saying. I'd expect a bit more back and forth between them.
I just realized something...
Everypony should be speaking like Luna did. With the protagonist having to learn how to speak old English.
I understand why the author isn't doing it (because it would be a pain in the ass). I just thought it a bit ammusing.
Random Trivia:
"Ye" is pronouced exactly the same as "the". In old English there was a character similar in shape to a Y that was pronounced "th".
..just found this, gave the summary a glance over an thought it was going to be a generic "HiE fic with a twist" focused around Discord this time ...did not meet my expectations.
blew them right out of the rainbow factory at Sonic Rainboom speeds to be met with a Pinkie Pie Personal Punch (with the strength of a thousand suns!) into the stratosphere!!!!!.....it was gooooooooood!
maybe get into ye olde shakespear mood while writing in the time just after discords "stoning" ;3
not too much! we want it to make sense! lol
can't wait for more updates! keep up the good work!
p.s . . . fav!!!
7063464 I tried doing that, but it was taking me hours to write what would normally only take a single hour, if not less. I just stopped trying after a while, though I do like the idea that Luna and Celestia were just starting to use the We and Our at this point, so they forget sometimes.
7089931 Grad you riked it.
LOL "this is a clopfic." clopfic implies mindless clop for clops sake. if this is "modern" clop, i am excited for the future of non clop stories.
on an unrelated note, why max? there's nothing wrong with naming the character max, just curious.
on another unrelated note, this story is more addictive than crack and i seem to have run out of my drug of choice. i.imgflip.com/rik2p.jpg
7151969 Like with Sub, I've got about 2k written out, but I just don't have it finished yet. I have the weekend off though, so I'll try to finish them both.
7151974 a double dose of awesome to look forward to? someone is looking to spoil his readers worse than a kid in a candy store who liberated his mom's wallet
7151990 Well, apparently I've already spoiled them. My old update rate was about once a week at least. I've been busy lately though
7153594 i remember when you first started writing substitute and it seemed that there was a new chapter every day and sometimes even twice in one day like when cim had a hangover. that actually makes me wonder, can changelings get drunk? it would be beyond hilarious to see zelus going on the prowl hammered
sister's
worst
she'd stopped
sister's
sister's
extraneous quote
aid,"
questions should have question marks
flare
Someone
Hrm. Text consistently uses aide in context where aid should be used. An aide is a person, an assistant. Aid is the service provided, the assistance. Thus first aid and a presidential aide or aide-de-camp.
Love it!
This is pure gold. I'm so glad I found this story.
Am I the only one put off by how clinical Max is being? He's very manipulative, and whilst I understand that he HAS to have some sort of bond or he will die, it feels like he's using Luna. Aside from the primal lust he's experienced he hasn't seen his relationship as anything other than an objective. It's an interesting take and it makes my skin crawl. I do hope he stops seeing relationships as just food at some point.
7706251 I noticed that as well.
7706251
Just replace the opening of this story with an experimental A.I. being sent into an alternate dimension with the memories of the person it was based off of.
He's just smashing around with these newfangled change ideas, isn't he?
i'm guessing these are ponies thoughts on change.
Tiene un progreso creĆble de personaje
Fair points.
Why the fuck are people disliking llacson's coments!?
They're positive reviews for fucks sale!
9223759
???
8495455
Rippin the bandaid off. Gettin the ideas flowing like Inception and feeding them with honeyed words. Truly a dangerous individual, capable of capitalizing on weakness and opportunity.
7706251
Maybe a little because she is feeding him but he also trying to be nice and help her even if it means shaking things up some.
7706251
Well that how it is when love=not die
11127999
That and he doesn't come off as insincere to me it strikes me more as if he's playing both her and himself the way he acts and speaks comes from the heart it's just he's adjusted his filter so that he has nothing to hide now cause when you need trust to get love secrets aren't an option.