- Member Since 14th Aug, 2013
- offline last seen Apr 23rd, 2018
Night Music
Here I am, back at it again, doing absolutely nothing.
Night Music
Joined 14th Aug, 2013 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- The Wingman · 13k words · 133 13 · 1.4k views
- midashguy · 4.6k words · 61 8 · 1.3k views
- Dan_s Comments · 8.6k words · 28 14 · 722 views
- Winter Rosario · 31k words · 87 20 · 2.3k views
- Ssendam the Masked · 5.8k words · 108 6 · 2.1k views
- Teush · 4k words · 49 2 · 1.9k views
- BookyBrony · 3.6k words · 73 10 · 1.2k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.103 seconds
Total duration
928 users online
320,094 hits today, 1,960,719 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
this dude seems to have jumped off the deep end...interesting
Interesting, so far-so good as far as a first chapter. No spelling errors or grammar mistakes I've found as of yet. (Tired, will re-read tomorrow)
I'll keep an eye on this as it progresses; maybe tone down the badassery until later in the story though, kinda coming off as OP. Killing hydras and dragons in the first chapter may have been rushing it a bit, but I can tell he's not a normal human by his fatigues and the odd magic he's using. A proof-reader will help to reign in assumptions by giving you a perspective of whats coming off from someone who doesn't know what lies ahead. Overall you've captured my attention and that's what you want for a start.
6880108 Thanks for the feedback!
Don't worry about the character being OP or seeming to be an overly bad-ass character, all of that will be... addressed. 
I thank you again for the feedback though.
I'll keep an eye on the story, seems alright so far.
Have your first like, I'll keep watch on this one, hopefully it won't go South...... Best of luck to ya', though.
6880108 the odd magic ant that odd think voodoo.Type voodoo market in google you'll get corpses an animal parts piled high for sale. He is just far more bloody.
One sentence chopped into three at awkward places. This does not bode well.
6882045 Oh damn, how the hell did that get like that? Sorry 'bout that. Thanks for catching it though.
Eh, ill keep an eye on the story, but personally I don't like my humans to have magical abilities.
I don't mind them utilizing magical artifacts, just so long as the magic is entirely contained within and caused by the Equestrian magical what-have-you. But there has to be some physical item for that power to be atributed to for me to really get into it.
Humans aren't magical.
We stick with what we know (or at least, what we understand to a decent extent), so this guy suddenly knowing enough about how magic works to perform a ritual powerful enough to do something that Twilight wouldn't spot immediately is kinda absurd.
6881907
Odd to anyone not familiar with voodoo. At any rate, if it is voodoo according to the author then, now we have an idea of what goes on during his rituals.
wow this story looks great! I'll keep an eye on it
Just when I thought this was going to be a great HiE fic, you pull this cliche shit. It was great. I was enjoying the read until the end.
Cheapens the entire story. I'm fucking done.
I bet the macabre voodoo is the only way a human can manipulate magic, by tearing it from the flesh of the dead. It fits with the whole 'master of the environment' humans have going for them.
I like that it's not your typical HIE fic, this guy is obviously suffering some form of PTSD.
6883746
Humans are more "masters of knowledge" (or technology and improvisation, as the case may be) than "masters of the environment".
We utilize everything we can to survive the environment, but we have little to no control over the environment itself (though we do pretty well at spewing garbage and pollutants into the environment, which does have an impact here on Earth thanks to the sheer volume at which we do so.)
If anything, Pegasi or possibly Zebras would be more "Masters of the Environment" than humans.
You have my curiosity...
6883171
so you're just being picky.
you won't be missed.
6886227 Oi, I'll have none of that here, only nice things to say to our fellow fanbase members, here at least. He didn't like, oh well.
Awwww, I wanted to see him kick ass. Maybe later, after hearing his story, I want to see him beat the fuck out of Celestia.
The end was pretty metal.
........... What?
In Britain (and many other places in the 19th and 20th century) the crown often had a standing arrangement with the passenger train companies.
They paid for a sort of "all access" travel, so they never needed arrangements to board a train anywhere in the country.
Anyone acting in an official capacity who needed to board a passenger train headed anywhere in the country could do so simply by flashing their credentials. (The royal family, of course, could just walk on as if they owned the place).
(They pay ~for a full year, five years, or how ever much the train company and the crown arrange for in advance~ for unlimited train use within that period, and just like that, they can come and go as they please. No ticket purchase necessary, because their passage has already been paid for.)
This was often less because they needed regular travel, and more so they could do so without ever needing to purchase tickets in advance, because if they did have to purchase tickets, then the wrong person or persons might overhear the sale or find out about it, which would be a potential security concern.
So the more paths and means of transport they had available at an instant's notice without pre-planning, the more secure routes they had for protecting valuable items or VIP's who were being discretely transported should they find themselves under attack or being pursued. IE, the queen's personal carriage and escort are attacked by surprise, a small number of her guard can slip out of the carriage with her in tow, board a train, and be headed to a safe location without any need for stopping to purchase tickets.
Obviously this wouldn't be ideal, but if there are too many dangers watching the streets and you need to travel a long distance, you have a relatively secure way to do so. The only guy who's gonna know you're on the train with the queen herself is going to be a single ticket master. And the chances that the threat has managed to also infiltrate that particular train on the very off chance that the queen would take a run-of-the-mill passenger train on that particular rail company's cars is practically nonexistent. And even then, you can come and go at any time, so you can jump trains at the very next stop. This allows the possibility of being able to escape the carriage attack, get on a train headed in the opposite direction of where the threat thinks you're going, then hop trains and double back after the enemy forces have lost track of you and spread out.
Even if they weren't expecting to need the train arrangement to evade an attack on their own soil, I would expect that the Equestrian government would have a similar arrangement with the train companies.
(Hell, If I were Celestia or Luna, I would have this done just so I could sneak off and enjoy the scenery of a train ride as a way to relax and play hooky. Do it about once every 5-8 decades, and as long as you don't make a big deal about it so it doesn't get recorded in some sort of public record, no one will live long enough to really catch on, let alone predict when it will happen.)
7418368 Huh...
I didn't know that... Kind of regret making him steal the Bits now.
Never really like making characters bad per-say, more like morally questionable.
Thanks for taking the time and writing that. Never really had a second thought about it. I was gonna say something like 'Celestia can defend herself' but looking back at every one of the previous villains she has fought, it doesn't really help that case.
But yeah, thanks for writing that out.
That must have taken some time.
Please don't take this sarcastically. I never like it when people think I'm being sarcastic with my thanks.
7418484
I understand.
Most people aren't aware of government transport preferences anyway.
I only know this particular little bit of trivia thanks to a grade school report I did on 1800's through 1900's trains and their more notable/interesting practices.
that was weird
i wonder when celestia will realize this is all her fault as usual
Does Tirek appear in this story?
8004908 Probably not. Maybe. I can't really say.
8004944 when there will be more updates?
8007415 Hard to say exactly when there will be more updates, I'm already working on the next chapter but I'm not exactly pounding it out, just a slow process.
8007517 that's good, I really like this story! i'm anxious for the next chapters
8007540 I'm glad you enjoy it.
Very intriguing story, I am looking forward to future updates. Keep up the good work!
it must be devastating to hear that a creatures only wish in life is to die and its their fault being a peace loving race as they are kinda reminds me of the jason stories where after 3 to 5 years of torment he commits suicide some he succeeds and some he fails
Wow man that's deep continues with the good work.