- Member Since 25th Jun, 2014
- offline last seen 9 hours ago
Dice Warwick
Dislexic tring to wright storys, makes gammer natzie eyes bleed.
Dice Warwick
Joined 25th Jun, 2014 ·
Offline
Sequels2
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not even 20 minutes into it's release, and I already have a thumbs down XP
5737437
We feel your pain.
5737437
It's just the haters. Don't worry about it TOO much. *Squishy ghoul hugs*
Y-you mean ... Churning Waters, right? Or is there a pun I'm missing out on here...
5748066 nope, It's Chumming, as in throwing blood, bone, and body parts in the water to attract fish and sharks.
Mixed tense doesn't usually bother me but this jumped up an bit me for some reason
I think its because putting did in there messes something up.
so ... The cunt did stab me and throw me into the water.
or ... The cunt stabbed me and threw me into the water.
Shit I've become a grammar Nazi .. shoot me now.
Other than that this was a much easier read than parts of Stable-Tec R&D.
5784107
It is improving with every chapter put out though! Leaps and bounds over Stable-Tec before it was gone over!
Anyway, onto the chapter!
There is more to the eye than just using the stair, obviously, but the red and green reminds me of Sombra's eyes. I'm really interested in what it actually is, and what it's full potential is! I'm just waiting for Star Charter to start to ask for Crystals to eat.
But overall, another good chapter, where the assault has begun and then there's the return of Prism! Should be interesting to see where it goes!
5784107 thanks, grammar will always be a problem for me, but at least with the writing in general, I'm improving.
5784902 Close on the eyes, but just revers the two colors. (Green on the inside, and red on the outside.) There will be a lot of eating, but sadly no crystals. I like to keep my evil magic simple, insidious, and fun.
5924125 thanks, I'm actually putting up an Epilogue soon, it sould have a little treat if you likes my last story.
Great story. Loved the ending just wish it wouldn't of ended.
5928576 thanks, but like they say, all good things must come to an end. And sometimes, one ending leads to a new beginning. I got another story in the works, so keep an ear out.
Your book has been advertised on the new facebook group page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/foebooks/ :)
I'm not sure why, but I read the entire chapter with an Irish accent.
Ah found it! :)
First time i see a FE story from the point of view of an alicorn
Yaaaar quite fine booty!
Btw some editing you may want to do:
new area- era
thieves to talk it. -to take it
captains pony's - pony captains
Well accept - Except
together then kill - than
they were tiring - trying
My tale was the worst off-tail
he killed herself to she her -?
and thought him - taught
hut me real - hurt
realy - really
their was enough of the books the we didn't need to share - there were enough books that...
so to lot let any - dont let
Saved a peace- piece
I sould build-should
that's way they -why
Down a flight a flight
safe to amuse that - asume
me, of it will - or
It's were he also controls the city - where
that I hade trotted - had
the hole back of the city - whole
the guard new what I - knew
8190426 ya, the first few chapters will be like that, but eventually I got someone to start helping with the editing. This story tends to have a bit more problems, but the chapters are shorter, I was still trying to feel things out. The basick Idea was that this was to be a quick easy read for Fo:E fans. Also, the pirates, and their religion do go beyond this story, Their meant to be a spred out, and dangrus antaganist to any hero out in the Fo:E world
Yor hor hor thw pony pirate life is for.me
Cool action, specially with the power armor.
And nice song :)
Editing is magic
This last revelation make the story looks deeper
Nice plot twist!
I just wonder how they managed to reduce an alicorn
8194263 basically Prism has been getting weaker, and with no place for her to properly rest, and no radiation for her to recharge, she simply has too little strength left to fight.
Uhhh they almost went to R&D vault. That would have been interesting xD
This, is a gut story :)
I liked it very much. It has a nice change of speed for the usual FE fic.
8194309 oh that makes sense now
8190589 well then you archieved ypur objectives
8196366 Well now that your done, I suggest you read On Rust Red Shores as it's a direct Sequel to Cumming Waters, and is completed. Dance of the Ortherus is also a continuation of the timeline, but much longer, and not finished yet.
Also it has art for each chapter. and has a coronation to Gammas Story "Better Days"
Also before reading the one-shot I did, read a few chapters of DotO, so you at least know the setting, the MC of the one shot is the DJ from Dance of the Orthrus.
I've said it before, but thanks for the read.
8198117 I already began to read DotO xD thanks for the recommendation.
also thanks to you for writting
Could use a bit of grammar editing but is better than a lot of stories out there. Great Introduction.
8194051
Cannibalism is magic
Wow. I guess there are side effects to magical rituals like that.
Damn. That's rough. She has a hard choice to make.
Huh. That was pretty good.
Just read fallout Equestria: Stable tec R&D and im starting this one next, can wait to see where this is going
An avid reader, LB
9985362
well be ready for pirates, very religious pirates. Unfortunately their not as flushed out as they will be in later stories, but I did start getting someone to help edit this, so theirs a sudden jump in quality after a few chapters.
8759247
Magic is Magic
I love the ending of this story! I just finished R&D so its cool that the end of both stories meet here
BL ,syawla sa modnaR
Random as always, LB
9986641
I'd suggest reading "On Rust Red Shores" next, as it picks up right after this, and should be an easy read. "Dance of the Orthrus" is super long, but you get to find out what happend to the R&D Stable 200 years later.
9986655
Okay will do :)
A person that loves a lot, LB
I’m sensing some raider ish thing coming off them that one mare giggling and hitting her hoof the rest adding spikes to there armor and of corse the cannibalism
10077470
yerp, the faction was still quite underdeveloped when I wrote this, but the actual pirates, not the ship guards or the band of teenage ganggers that's in this story, are basically super nasty, super religious sea raiders.
More fine work I should of read this sooner. thanks again for your story
10312230
there is a direct sequel to this as well "On Rust Red Shores" It's better written as well.
10312849
Already 6 chapters in. :)
Nothing quite like a story that starts with a stabbin
Eyeball shots my favorite
The frenzy thing reminds me of vampire the masquerade I like it though a bit of regen is always nice
10362277
just wait untill you read Dance of the Orthrus... I somehow made something even worse... the poor pony.
10362715
It was not intentional, but the evil eye dose end up being on the vampire side, I even want to do a story based around the quest from Fallout 3 "The Family" where filly Star is almost adopted by vamire ponies.
Lol this mutiny is approved
10362982
Oops forgot all these comments pile up on the story page, looks like I'm spamming :D you thinking about another story is great. see I read stabletec R&D years ago and loved it and just yesterday I was looking for more stories and saw that I somehow missed like 3 stories of yours over the years.