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Description: What was supposed to be a simple trip to Ponyville instead leads Soarin on an adventure that will determine the future of all Equestria. Will he be able to save Applejack and her friends from a fate worse than death?
Picture by Opal Whisper. You can check out their page at: http://opalwhisker.deviantart.com/
Note: the fic is complete, I'm just oploading it here over the next week or so.
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This was one if my first n favorite docs
Pure beauty
I'm happy to see that you're uploading this here as well.
It's Always Sunny In Fillydelphia and Semper Fidelis are among the top of my favorite stories!
I remember reading this some time ago on, GDocs I think? Whatever, definitely worth a fave here.
Hey I remember this, good story have to re-read. I'm a huge sucker for SorJack.
Holy crap, this was finally posted. I think the sequel to my favorite shipfic deserves a spot here.
"Complete".
Please tell me that's a mistake.
Read quite a bit of this on Deviantart, glad it got posted here.
497607
Don't worry, it's got five chapters! I'm guessing Bobcat will upload them one by one over a period of time, but it was written and finished quite a while ago hence the status. The whole thing is up on Fanfiction.net or Bobcat's deviantart account if you don't feel like waiting.
497677
Ah, okay then. Thanks for the information.
Great first chapter!
Still remember this, insta-fave and thumbs up.
Just a question, is this a straight cut-and-paste or is there new content in this story?
508408 Aside from a few minor edits, yeah, I'm just reposting it.
>>Bobcat I'm hooked. And I randomly decided to only view it here, so please upload. I read more than I write, so you're kind of my noodle soup right now. If you don't mind the very subtle pun.
Awesome, glad to see this one here as well.
AHHHH. Why the cliff hangers. Why.
And then Celestia said "LET THERE BE LIGHT!"
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>>Bobcat Good chapter. But, the cliffhanger! Must have MOAR!
I hope you're at least going to do something to continue this. It's been 9 months since I've read something new by the guy who got me onto the SoarJack ship.
579599 Sorry to disappoint, but I'm pretty out of the Pony community.
Yep. This was good.
Well, as much sense as it makes to give critique on a story that is old enough for the writer to probably already know about all its flaws and have improved his writing, I am trying to leave more comments on stories I read, so here goes.
There's a lot to like about this story: Soarin and AJ's relationship is sweet and it's great to see it developed beyond Always Sunny; the tone of the work is refreshingly close to the show, and you avoid common fanfic pratfalls of needless gore and melodrama (which would have been all-too-easily realised here); and your Applejack characterisation (as far as I could tell) is pretty much spot-on. Oh, and I thought the sound barrier thing in Chapter 2 was really freakin' clever.
However, your action scenes aren't quite there. You bog down the pacing with too much internal monologuing and word-fluff. Sure, some of that monologuing is important, and a lot of the fluff is certainly amusing, but all too often you trade good pacing for a little amusement, and it doesn't quite balance out.
What's more, there were far too many points (mostly in Chapter 4) where it felt like everyone was taking a timeout from fighting for their lives to chat. I couldn't help but think of Tirek standing around idly, tapping his hoof on the ground and looking at his watch as Soarin conferred with Big Mac and co, and then again as he conferred with the Doctor.
So, broadly speaking, I liked the story, but it was hurt by poor action pacing. Still, thanks for writing, and good luck with whatever you're doing now.
596508 I definitely appreciate you taking the time to critique my story. I agree with the points you made. The story was written ahead of a month long trip to Honduras, so at the time I felt like I'd rushed some things or not polished them as well as I might have. But I'm glad you liked what you did. Sadly, I haven't had time to do much if any writing.
When I first started reading this, I thought the only thing that could make this better was Doctor Whooves.
And then it happened.
Needless to say, I had a fangasm.
I believe you are the reason I am passing Latin.
SOARINJACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FIVE SPIKES FOR U!
the titles aren't even english what the heck
2364591 I believe its in Latin, but the chapters are in English.
2364591 Son, the Story is called "Semper Fidelis." Obviously Latin phrases are a theme.
i love how when soarins plans lead to the conclusion that he might die he always thinks '' oh well ''
Huh, this just got more interesting.
Phew. That dragon chase was intense.
Well, I absolutely loved this. TWO THUMBS UP.
Soarin chuckled. "A little, actually. See, I was late getting my mark. Really late; I had to wait until I was thirteen."
Apple Bloom's jaw dropped. "You mean ah might have to wait four whole years to get mah mark? B-but ah..."
Wow just like when Applejack told the story about how she got her cutie mark she was the last Pony to get hers including Big Macintosh
Oh yeah that's right back in season 1 that dragon almost cover his smoke around Ponyville which that will cause problems
Wow what a way to start out the story so Soarin finally got the chance to visit Ponyville but he could not find Applejack but he did meet up with the family and Big Macintosh is okay with him and even having lunch but even ask about the situation about Applejack and her friends haven't returned for a long time and Ponyville are getting worried about them so it looks like soarin volunteer to find Applejack and the others and they went to a town which apparently is deserted until a couple of creatures showed up and attacked him and he tried to escape as best as he could but unfortunately he got caught and being dragged but he thinks this would lead them to Applejack and the others well let's see how this will go
"So now we just wait fer the cavalry to show up."
Soarin blinked. "Um... the other Wonderbolts?"
Yeah it wasn't that smart idea 😥
Yeah I did remember back in season 1 how that dragon almost covered Ponyville again I know dragons basically sleeps anywhere but they need to find somewhere that is basically no pony or creature out there
Ok wow that was pretty epic I had to admit so it looks like Applejack and Soarin are planning to figure out how to get themself out of here and try to get some help but unfortunately their plan has been foiled because Scorpan has only been waiting for them to come out and now they chase after them and soarin with his power of flight try to flee from the dragon unfortunately not good enough but with a lot of luck and everything he eventually got the dragon off of him and finding Applejack really got worried about him but luckily both of them are okay and now they have to deal with Scorpan
So once again this is way before season 4 came around and it feels like a reference to the G1 characters
I wonder Tirek turn Twilight and the others aside from Applejack into those monsters like in that movie
So it looks like everything just happens so first of all Applejack tried to get Scorpan to talk but unfortunately he just taunt her and soarin have to intervene before things escalate so they had to get away from him for a while before they think of another plan and they were just having the moment with each other also telling their stories and everything but before they can head back they heard screaming and it looks like Scorpan return to his human self which apparently this humans in Equestria and told him about Tirek and how he used his magic to corrupt him and also corrupt her friends into hideous monsters this is way out of his league so he tried to get help but then Tirek was also taunting them so with that they decided to do this for themselves even though it's kind of suicidal Scorpan had to take care of the other corrupted dragons and Applejack and Soarin are dealing with Tirek and despite their effort it was still not enough and they both lost and soarin felt like he failed everybody especially to Applejack then Tirek use his magic to transform her into a monster like the others and he was about to corrupt him but he ran out of magic so he returned to the castle where he recharge but it looks like soarin will do anything to save them well I hope he can do this because right now this is getting really bad
Yeah me too they really know how to mess with your head when they use that kind of power against you
Hey it's the doctor
Yeah seriously Pinkie Pie will always break the laws of physics
Oh I see Tirek knows what's a Time Lord is
At least one pony he kind of respect even though he gets annoyed by soarin
Wow this was a pretty epic battle and you really made soarin a hero which he's a pretty cool guy so he was flying towards Tirek to see if he can try to defeat him or at least try to fray the others and after a couple hours of hitting on with his best attack he thought he was a goner but luckily the ponies of Ponyville came to the rescue but not only his blast kind of affected Tirek but it looks like the power turn Twilight and the others back to normal but she was pretty happy to see that including Applejack back to normal but the monster is not done yet and they need to get the elements of harmony and Twilight has to teleport them here but it's going to take a lot of time so the Ponyville ponies have to distract him as fast as they could while Soarin and doctor whooves it's with them just in case for backup and of course it didn't last that long but there was another delay because Scorpan and his Dragon came along and tried to stop him as well and for a human with a any plans he did gave Tirek some hard time but again didn't take him long to defeat Scorpan and his dragon so the doctor did the most ridiculous thing even though it was distracting him selling him with candy again the doctor is a Madman but he did what he could but of course didn't last so once again it was up to soarin try to give the girls a chance to get their Elements of Harmony he did all he tried his best to give him the cat and mouse Chase even try to give him the slow but unfortunately he got caught and Tirek basically pummeled him leaving him injured and he was about to kill him off but luckily Twilight and her friends got the elements of harmony and they were prepared to fire on him and Tirek was going to charge at them but soarin kicked his bad leg causing him to go down but he got caught Underneath Him and basically soarin his trap and the rainbow of light hits both of them I just hope soarin okay going to the fact that he basically sacrificed himself to give the girls a chance to fire that Tirek
Wow that was a pretty fast recovery
From outside, Scorpan's booming voice answered, "They found you buried under a pile of his ash; draw your own conclusions."
Soarin shuddered. "Ew! AJ, why didn't you tell me?"
Oh yeah that is so gross 🤢