Grrr. I always get so excited when a new chapter comes out, then so annoyed that you left it at a cliff hanger! You're writing is good enough that you can come to a breaking point in the story instead of a cliff hanger every time!
We will get get to see Twilight and Trixie using their new toy(s), right? Seriously though, I really love the dynamic they have together. I'm not so sure about the whole Applejack/Rarity relationship here, however. I'm not really feeling it. Also, what a twist!
From the very first - admittedly pretty hilarious - sentence, I felt like this chapter was... just a little light in the loafers. The revelation at the end was intriguing, and I certainly enjoyed elements of the interactions, but... somehow it just felt a little 'off'. I have gotten used to a very high standard of intensity in writing from you and this chapter, while very pleasant and well crafted, just kind of left me more... I don't know. Less astonished, perhaps.
Then again, to be fair, this was a kind of filler chapter, more mundane events between the powerful ones, and really, how could such be otherwise?
Perhaps I am judging your work from a position of being overawed, and that isn't fair. It's unreasonable to expect you to explode my sensibilities every chapter.
I did find the teasing nature of Rarity and Applejack very fun, the exploration of the 'ick factor' interesting in context, and it was quite clever the way you made 'Lulamoon' into essentially a follower of a wilder, more dangerous Luna, long, long ago. It is also intriguing how Trixie is 'topping from the bottom' (I have been studying terminology, thanks to your stories!) as she teaches Twilight to meet her needs.
As always, I am impressed with how genuine the characters feel, how... 'real'... they seem.
I also sense an undercurrent of future danger, even horror, coming up involving certain genes and this concept of mage-melding.
And a dark, dark part of me wonders... is Trixie really working out an incredibly elaborate plan to finally overthrow the princesses... or worse, is she being driven by a genetic memory that is controlling her to the same end? I don't want to think the first, because I have come to like your Trixie, and I would not enjoy, I think, seeing her become a truly evil Big Bad.
So many possibilities. But then, it is a good story that breeds them.
Twilight and Applejack talking so openly about Rarity's enormous hyper-stallion-dick is jarring. While both Twilight and AJ (and I guess Jinxieverse's Rarity too) seem like the type who could talk openly about sex, this is just kind of out-there.
I'll think out loud a little more after I've gotten some sleep.
684187 Oh, it's jarring for Twilight as well- she's waaaay out of her comfort zone and trying to be cool in front of her friends. Applejack's improvising on being filly-ized by Rarity, basically kicking back with a vengeance like 'hah, embarrass me, will you? Try this on for size'. It's her sense of humor getting her to deadpan stuff like the 'farm dog' business, which is aimed at Rarity, not Twi. And Rarity takes what she wants- and is taking Applejack, and also taking over Applejack's mainstreaming of her femininity (not entirely to AJ's liking- the concept itself is fine if scary, but AJ thinks it is her business to introduce at her own pace, so when Rarity forces the issue, AJ starts making trouble as hard as she can)
Trixie NEVER had so much fun, watching all that. She's pretty good at reading details of BDSM dynamics and reads it as AJ being a wilful sub, which she certainly would be- and Rarity being a classic dom, which she's bloody good at. She nearly had Trixie respond with that snapped "Girl!" but Trixie chose to stay focussed on Twilight. And she does not know why she isn't deferring to the Princesses, she just isn't...
684077 There will be more superheavy intensity- but yes, Applejack and Rarity don't really generate it with each other. It's like on one level they get along too well, and on another level they're just too alien to each other, incomprehensible. There's a level of respect that will always be there and it tends to immunize them from the kind of drama Dash is going through, trying to reinvent herself and feeling betrayed by everything she knows. Applejack and Rarity went into their thing eyes wide open, understanding some of their limits, with really solid ground rules and clear expectations. That's not a recipe for drama, that's a recipe for an oasis with kidding-around and jokes, and neither of 'em are really trying to reach out that much if you think about it. It's not 'talk about your feelings time' for either of them.
I would've expected you to be completely unsubtle about Twilight's discomfort. She's surprised and a little overwhelmed by AJ and Rarity, but she's totally happy to bring up how Rarity oughta be the one who's walking funny. Especially considering what kind of memories must be associated with that time in her life by now. Perhaps it's just that my headcanon Twilight clashes a little bit with Jinxieverse Twilight.
My next thing is perhaps more important. I had to sit and think about this for a minute, but I got this nailed.
Your concept is that Flutters and Pinkie team up to browbeat Dash, trying to give her some tough love. She loses patience with them too fast to do the mature thing, and runs from her problems yet again. This is a reasonable and at first very satisfying forumlation of your whole "good hearts don't always understand each other" concept. My problem is that Pinkie is supposed to be ultra-perceptive. Sure she just learned about the whole wings thing, but she knows she was second in Dash's heart to AJ, so why doesn't she even SUSPECT that Dash may have 'given her wings' to her dear marefriend? Sure the whole concept is new to Pinkie, but I should think the two pegasi of the m6 aren't the first or last to form that sort of bond with a homosexual partner rather than a proper mate.
Last thing: There's a pairing I've wanted to exist for a long time but never had the guts to write, partially because I'd have to fight tooth and nail against the very show-appropriate assumption that they're sisters. Making it a Jinxieverse fic would give me the excuse I need to kick myself into gear and write about two ponies who appear, un-voiced, in a single episode, but are close to my heart: Flitter and Cloudchaser. I'm suspending my actual pet project for this, but I love Chaser's appearance so much that I just gotta create a character for her as well as explore what I badly want to interpret as a romantic relationship. Given their appearances, one could make an argue for a "butch and femme" type of setup, but they deserve something more nuanced than that...
687674 Aw- well, Twilight does manage to put her hoof in it all too often, I chalked that up to awkwardness. She can't really be that distressed being with two dear dear friends, EoHs, and the love of her life- she's just totally unclear of how to handle anything, not seriously threatened- and Rarity starts things off instantly with crooning, sexual innuendoes as only she can! Which Applejack does not in the least bit deny...
Maybe Pinkie's going to be the first to realize the truth? It's true that she's very very right except when she's catastrophically wrong- notably and canonically, wrong about her friends not valuing her. I have a feeling that the reason she missed that pegasus subtlety, is because she fell into her very Pinkie trap of assuming Dash didn't love her or want to be her marefriend at all (oh, no, I understand, it's totally okay, I have Fluttershy after all- she's actually hurt, I'm sure of it). That suggests that if she does clue in to the truth, one she'll feel a lot better and two, she'll immediately become a huge AppleDash cheerleader and bend heaven and earth to reunite them.
*squee* if you do come up with a Trixieverse story, link me! I'll give it a blogpost- though I'm not gonna make a thing of reading/critting Trixieverse fics unless or until I quit writing the original ones, I always squee when anypony wants to make one, and I'm happy to try and promote 'em.
Fine, fine, I'll start calling it the Trixieverse. I wanted my name to stick and I meant it as a term of endearment, but I suppose you want to leave the door open for other fic-verses that are equally yours.
I'm trying to nail down what would make a Trixieverse fic qualify as part of the same universe. Beyond specific worldbuilding details, of course. You're strict-Equestria, and you make a huge deal of what you call "keeping it pony," even when you bear down ridiculously hard on minor canon hints (again I refer to your Trixie) or go to emotional places no saturday morning cartoon would. I can FEEL your efforts to keep the ponies ponyish, but it's hard to put a hoof on what the criteria is. From talking to you about this kinda stuff I've come up with a bit of headcanon-- which I love-- that strength of heart is the birthright of all ponies. But that's not all there is to it, is there? The characters aren't just individually pure-hearted; the way darkness, sorrow, and danger are handled must be done a certain way too...
I want to make a Trixieverse fic feel faithful even if it doesn't call in specifics like wing traditions or the titular magic artifact, but there is something distinctive about these two fics that will be tough for anyone to do as well as you do. These are straight-out soap opera drama fests. The characters' feelings and interactions drive everything. From a strictly in-universe perspective it's that the ponies are intensely sexual and emotional beings, but that won't be good enough. I've got to teach myself just a little bit of the love you have for these ponies. I often wonder exactly what you mean when you say things like "I'll ask Lyra" or "Don't let Dashie hear that." Maybe I oughta teach myself.
It's easier to talk about these things than to kick my own ass into starting the actual writing, isn't it. If every word of ponyfic discussion I wrote was a word of actual fic, I'd have The Sixth Age edited and ready for EQD, with two or three more chapters finished by now.
688724 Sugarcube, if you're writing Trixieverse (by any name), there's no getting around the fact that there's five magic bits floatin' around and that pegasi reproduce a certain way. Some of these things are nailed down pretty solid at this point, and using such established points is in no way plagiarism. Maybe part of what drives the 'verse is that grimdark drags at me like a bulldozer, but the ponies drag back just as powerfully?
They are absolutely determined not to lose heart- but all their little worlds are so different that it's usually impossible for them to really understand each other. They fit and don't fit with each other, on levels shallow and deep, and in some ways there really are no OTPs to them, only a series of accomodations. They thrive best when paired or grouped off with the same TYPE of pony, not necessarily species-wise- but they're curious, and eager to share their hearts and other bits, if only their hangups wouldn't keep gettin' in the way. And pretty much all of them want to love and be accepting- exceptions Trixie and Dash, other kind of exception Fluttershy who desperately wants to be loving but has that judgemental streak that always pops up.
If you can say "strength of heart is the birthright of all ponies" you'll do fine. You know it's not just about being 'pure' hearted *snrk* in this universe? I ask you! But they'd all like to believe they are good-hearted- exceptions, Dash's dark streak/selfdoubt, Twilight's sense of herself as being perhaps too powerful and magical, Trixie's certainty that she must be mastered lest she become a monster of arrogance. Pinkie and Rarity are the most sure of themselves, Fluttershy sees herself as impossibly good but tainted by those (actually natural) impulses to criticise...
No, it's not that I would want to toss solid bits of Trixieverse canon. What I mean is, I can't be leaning on those bits in order to qualify. I should be able to write, say, a Romeo and Juliet love story in a remote town where nobody's ever heard of Trixie or magic dongs, and the only pegasi they ever see are visitors from cloud-cities, and still have something connect to your work.
Not that I think such an endeavor is either practical or desirable. That would be talking about assimilating your writing into my own, and I don't think that's possible and hopefully it's not really necessary. Yes, specifics will probably come into it somewhere.
Now that you mention it... maybe darkness is more of an essential part of your work than I thought. Your story has drive to it even though it doesn't have any single plot element directing it from the background, minus almost invisible things like the horniness radiation leak. There... That's what I'll try to reproduce. A dark element, something oppressive that makes the characters' hearts seem a little brighter when they manage to shine through.
There I go again. I've written fics shorter than all the words I've said to you...
688952 I never said it was the best sex ever for Applejack. Seems to me it's kind of awkward and restrictive, in all sorts of ways.
As for Gilda, griffin fetishes do tend to respond to a lover who's a bit longer than your average griffin. THEY ovulate through cervical prodding, like a cat. Still doesn't make slumming with ponies optimal as a rule, but she had every excuse to spaz out. But it's true- they can fantasize all they like but when things get physical there are consequences to trying to make fantasy, reality.
"I did NOTHING so ungentlemanly as that! Applejack! Take that dreadful accusation back!"
Just a thought but wouldn't "ungentlecoltly" work a little better considering the circumstances? Mostly just a cosmetic change but switching things like that to better fit pony speech might make it slightly more immersive.
*finishes reading*
Wait... so... Twilight and Trixie are both part of some near lost family tree who made up a new kind of lust magic that was invented FOR Luna before her banishment and then used mind melding to steal the moon for a while? Suddenly, this just got a lot deeper than magical bits causing emotional strife. This is bringing in some lore and epic god powers. The potential blast radius for when this story finally blows up has gone from local ponyville to potentially Equestrian nuclear war.
I'm slowly warming up to RariJack, but I say they all have a nice sit-down pep talk and straighten out the BigIty/BigDash issue that was the cause of the break up.
Then again, I read the third book,s first few chapters before realizing I should have read this and the first book, so by spoilers I need not worry.
And i.,m still loving Luna's speech pattern mash-up. Great work!
Dun Dun duuuunnnn!! Damn! Luna got a magical futa dick for a gift?! That's pretty awesome! And Celly, that's funny. Twilight has a bit of Lulamoon inside of her. I see what you did there. RariJack is getting pretty good. Onward to the next chapter!
DAFUQ?!....just kidding Awesome as usual. Though I do wish to ask, is Mac gone for the rest of the story?
And the plot thickens
682040
Eeenope
682105Thx.
Oooooooh crap. That's hilarious and sad and awesome all at the same time.
Grrr. I always get so excited when a new chapter comes out, then so annoyed that you left it at a cliff hanger! You're writing is good enough that you can come to a breaking point in the story instead of a cliff hanger every time!
We will get get to see Twilight and Trixie using their new toy(s), right? Seriously though, I really love the dynamic they have together.
I'm not so sure about the whole Applejack/Rarity relationship here, however. I'm not really feeling it.
Also, what a twist!
Oh, Luna... oh Night and Stars...
From the very first - admittedly pretty hilarious - sentence, I felt like this chapter was... just a little light in the loafers. The revelation at the end was intriguing, and I certainly enjoyed elements of the interactions, but... somehow it just felt a little 'off'. I have gotten used to a very high standard of intensity in writing from you and this chapter, while very pleasant and well crafted, just kind of left me more... I don't know. Less astonished, perhaps.
Then again, to be fair, this was a kind of filler chapter, more mundane events between the powerful ones, and really, how could such be otherwise?
Perhaps I am judging your work from a position of being overawed, and that isn't fair. It's unreasonable to expect you to explode my sensibilities every chapter.
I did find the teasing nature of Rarity and Applejack very fun, the exploration of the 'ick factor' interesting in context, and it was quite clever the way you made 'Lulamoon' into essentially a follower of a wilder, more dangerous Luna, long, long ago. It is also intriguing how Trixie is 'topping from the bottom' (I have been studying terminology, thanks to your stories!) as she teaches Twilight to meet her needs.
As always, I am impressed with how genuine the characters feel, how... 'real'... they seem.
I also sense an undercurrent of future danger, even horror, coming up involving certain genes and this concept of mage-melding.
And a dark, dark part of me wonders... is Trixie really working out an incredibly elaborate plan to finally overthrow the princesses... or worse, is she being driven by a genetic memory that is controlling her to the same end? I don't want to think the first, because I have come to like your Trixie, and I would not enjoy, I think, seeing her become a truly evil Big Bad.
So many possibilities. But then, it is a good story that breeds them.
Also, apparently, the characters as well.
Holy shit, that plot.
Dis gun be good.
Um...
Twilight and Applejack talking so openly about Rarity's enormous hyper-stallion-dick is jarring. While both Twilight and AJ (and I guess Jinxieverse's Rarity too) seem like the type who could talk openly about sex, this is just kind of out-there.
I'll think out loud a little more after I've gotten some sleep.
684187
Oh, it's jarring for Twilight as well- she's waaaay out of her comfort zone and trying to be cool in front of her friends. Applejack's improvising on being filly-ized by Rarity, basically kicking back with a vengeance like 'hah, embarrass me, will you? Try this on for size'. It's her sense of humor getting her to deadpan stuff like the 'farm dog' business, which is aimed at Rarity, not Twi. And Rarity takes what she wants- and is taking Applejack, and also taking over Applejack's mainstreaming of her femininity (not entirely to AJ's liking- the concept itself is fine if scary, but AJ thinks it is her business to introduce at her own pace, so when Rarity forces the issue, AJ starts making trouble as hard as she can)
Trixie NEVER had so much fun, watching all that. She's pretty good at reading details of BDSM dynamics and reads it as AJ being a wilful sub, which she certainly would be- and Rarity being a classic dom, which she's bloody good at. She nearly had Trixie respond with that snapped "Girl!" but Trixie chose to stay focussed on Twilight. And she does not know why she isn't deferring to the Princesses, she just isn't...
684077
There will be more superheavy intensity- but yes, Applejack and Rarity don't really generate it with each other. It's like on one level they get along too well, and on another level they're just too alien to each other, incomprehensible. There's a level of respect that will always be there and it tends to immunize them from the kind of drama Dash is going through, trying to reinvent herself and feeling betrayed by everything she knows. Applejack and Rarity went into their thing eyes wide open, understanding some of their limits, with really solid ground rules and clear expectations. That's not a recipe for drama, that's a recipe for an oasis with kidding-around and jokes, and neither of 'em are really trying to reach out that much if you think about it. It's not 'talk about your feelings time' for either of them.
684516
I would've expected you to be completely unsubtle about Twilight's discomfort. She's surprised and a little overwhelmed by AJ and Rarity, but she's totally happy to bring up how Rarity oughta be the one who's walking funny. Especially considering what kind of memories must be associated with that time in her life by now. Perhaps it's just that my headcanon Twilight clashes a little bit with Jinxieverse Twilight.
My next thing is perhaps more important. I had to sit and think about this for a minute, but I got this nailed.
Your concept is that Flutters and Pinkie team up to browbeat Dash, trying to give her some tough love. She loses patience with them too fast to do the mature thing, and runs from her problems yet again. This is a reasonable and at first very satisfying forumlation of your whole "good hearts don't always understand each other" concept. My problem is that Pinkie is supposed to be ultra-perceptive. Sure she just learned about the whole wings thing, but she knows she was second in Dash's heart to AJ, so why doesn't she even SUSPECT that Dash may have 'given her wings' to her dear marefriend? Sure the whole concept is new to Pinkie, but I should think the two pegasi of the m6 aren't the first or last to form that sort of bond with a homosexual partner rather than a proper mate.
Last thing: There's a pairing I've wanted to exist for a long time but never had the guts to write, partially because I'd have to fight tooth and nail against the very show-appropriate assumption that they're sisters. Making it a Jinxieverse fic would give me the excuse I need to kick myself into gear and write about two ponies who appear, un-voiced, in a single episode, but are close to my heart: Flitter and Cloudchaser. I'm suspending my actual pet project for this, but I love Chaser's appearance so much that I just gotta create a character for her as well as explore what I badly want to interpret as a romantic relationship. Given their appearances, one could make an argue for a "butch and femme" type of setup, but they deserve something more nuanced than that...
I'll spare you my ADD-fueled ranting, then.
687674
Aw- well, Twilight does manage to put her hoof in it all too often, I chalked that up to awkwardness. She can't really be that distressed being with two dear dear friends, EoHs, and the love of her life- she's just totally unclear of how to handle anything, not seriously threatened- and Rarity starts things off instantly with crooning, sexual innuendoes as only she can! Which Applejack does not in the least bit deny...
Maybe Pinkie's going to be the first to realize the truth? It's true that she's very very right except when she's catastrophically wrong- notably and canonically, wrong about her friends not valuing her. I have a feeling that the reason she missed that pegasus subtlety, is because she fell into her very Pinkie trap of assuming Dash didn't love her or want to be her marefriend at all (oh, no, I understand, it's totally okay, I have Fluttershy after all- she's actually hurt, I'm sure of it). That suggests that if she does clue in to the truth, one she'll feel a lot better and two, she'll immediately become a huge AppleDash cheerleader and bend heaven and earth to reunite them.
*squee* if you do come up with a Trixieverse story, link me! I'll give it a blogpost- though I'm not gonna make a thing of reading/critting Trixieverse fics unless or until I quit writing the original ones, I always squee when anypony wants to make one, and I'm happy to try and promote 'em.
688571
Fine, fine, I'll start calling it the Trixieverse. I wanted my name to stick and I meant it as a term of endearment, but I suppose you want to leave the door open for other fic-verses that are equally yours.
I'm trying to nail down what would make a Trixieverse fic qualify as part of the same universe. Beyond specific worldbuilding details, of course. You're strict-Equestria, and you make a huge deal of what you call "keeping it pony," even when you bear down ridiculously hard on minor canon hints (again I refer to your Trixie) or go to emotional places no saturday morning cartoon would. I can FEEL your efforts to keep the ponies ponyish, but it's hard to put a hoof on what the criteria is. From talking to you about this kinda stuff I've come up with a bit of headcanon-- which I love-- that strength of heart is the birthright of all ponies. But that's not all there is to it, is there? The characters aren't just individually pure-hearted; the way darkness, sorrow, and danger are handled must be done a certain way too...
I want to make a Trixieverse fic feel faithful even if it doesn't call in specifics like wing traditions or the titular magic artifact, but there is something distinctive about these two fics that will be tough for anyone to do as well as you do. These are straight-out soap opera drama fests. The characters' feelings and interactions drive everything. From a strictly in-universe perspective it's that the ponies are intensely sexual and emotional beings, but that won't be good enough. I've got to teach myself just a little bit of the love you have for these ponies. I often wonder exactly what you mean when you say things like "I'll ask Lyra" or "Don't let Dashie hear that." Maybe I oughta teach myself.
It's easier to talk about these things than to kick my own ass into starting the actual writing, isn't it. If every word of ponyfic discussion I wrote was a word of actual fic, I'd have The Sixth Age edited and ready for EQD, with two or three more chapters finished by now.
688724
Sugarcube, if you're writing Trixieverse (by any name), there's no getting around the fact that there's five magic bits floatin' around and that pegasi reproduce a certain way. Some of these things are nailed down pretty solid at this point, and using such established points is in no way plagiarism. Maybe part of what drives the 'verse is that grimdark drags at me like a bulldozer, but the ponies drag back just as powerfully?
They are absolutely determined not to lose heart- but all their little worlds are so different that it's usually impossible for them to really understand each other. They fit and don't fit with each other, on levels shallow and deep, and in some ways there really are no OTPs to them, only a series of accomodations. They thrive best when paired or grouped off with the same TYPE of pony, not necessarily species-wise- but they're curious, and eager to share their hearts and other bits, if only their hangups wouldn't keep gettin' in the way. And pretty much all of them want to love and be accepting- exceptions Trixie and Dash, other kind of exception Fluttershy who desperately wants to be loving but has that judgemental streak that always pops up.
If you can say "strength of heart is the birthright of all ponies" you'll do fine. You know it's not just about being 'pure' hearted *snrk* in this universe? I ask you! But they'd all like to believe they are good-hearted- exceptions, Dash's dark streak/selfdoubt, Twilight's sense of herself as being perhaps too powerful and magical, Trixie's certainty that she must be mastered lest she become a monster of arrogance. Pinkie and Rarity are the most sure of themselves, Fluttershy sees herself as impossibly good but tainted by those (actually natural) impulses to criticise...
Genetic memory huh? Is it sad I am now thinking of Trixie in an animus?
688784
No, it's not that I would want to toss solid bits of Trixieverse canon. What I mean is, I can't be leaning on those bits in order to qualify. I should be able to write, say, a Romeo and Juliet love story in a remote town where nobody's ever heard of Trixie or magic dongs, and the only pegasi they ever see are visitors from cloud-cities, and still have something connect to your work.
Not that I think such an endeavor is either practical or desirable. That would be talking about assimilating your writing into my own, and I don't think that's possible and hopefully it's not really necessary. Yes, specifics will probably come into it somewhere.
Now that you mention it... maybe darkness is more of an essential part of your work than I thought. Your story has drive to it even though it doesn't have any single plot element directing it from the background, minus almost invisible things like the horniness radiation leak. There... That's what I'll try to reproduce. A dark element, something oppressive that makes the characters' hearts seem a little brighter when they manage to shine through.
There I go again. I've written fics shorter than all the words I've said to you...
688952
I never said it was the best sex ever for Applejack. Seems to me it's kind of awkward and restrictive, in all sorts of ways.
As for Gilda, griffin fetishes do tend to respond to a lover who's a bit longer than your average griffin. THEY ovulate through cervical prodding, like a cat. Still doesn't make slumming with ponies optimal as a rule, but she had every excuse to spaz out. But it's true- they can fantasize all they like but when things get physical there are consequences to trying to make fantasy, reality.
"I did NOTHING so ungentlemanly as that! Applejack! Take that dreadful accusation back!"
Just a thought but wouldn't "ungentlecoltly" work a little better considering the circumstances? Mostly just a cosmetic change but switching things like that to better fit pony speech might make it slightly more immersive.
*finishes reading*
Wait... so... Twilight and Trixie are both part of some near lost family tree who made up a new kind of lust magic that was invented FOR Luna before her banishment and then used mind melding to steal the moon for a while? Suddenly, this just got a lot deeper than magical bits causing emotional strife. This is bringing in some lore and epic god powers. The potential blast radius for when this story finally blows up has gone from local ponyville to potentially Equestrian nuclear war.
Gotta love a good ol' "dun dun dun..."
This is getting better every chapter. That's some awesome world building right there.
And I'm real happy Applejack has found love again, but I really, really, really... really really wanted her to get back with Rainbow Dash.
682044
But not nearly as thick as Rarity!~~~~
Couldn't help it...
Things are heating up!
I'm slowly warming up to RariJack, but I say they all have a nice sit-down pep talk and straighten out the BigIty/BigDash issue that was the cause of the break up.
Then again, I read the third book,s first few chapters before realizing I should have read this and the first book, so by spoilers I need not worry.
And i.,m still loving Luna's speech pattern mash-up. Great work!
Dun Dun duuuunnnn!! Damn! Luna got a magical futa dick for a gift?! That's pretty awesome! And Celly, that's funny. Twilight has a bit of Lulamoon inside of her. I see what you did there. RariJack is getting pretty good. Onward to the next chapter!
Wow. This plot twist... wow.
That’s some good RariJack right there.