Inner Strength
Spitfire had never slept so well. Clouds were so plush, soft, comforting and warm, but this bed felt special. Spitfire didn’t normally sleep on beds, except in times where she would go out of town for an air show, but there was something exquisite about this one.
Maybe it was the mattress that conformed to Spitfire’s form. Or better yet the firm yet yielding pillows, that had barely mussed up her mane.
Or…
Maybe it was the sight of a silly alicorn princess on another bed, with her wings stiff and upright, her blanket tossed completely off her. When Spitfire had woken up to that sight, she couldn’t help but chuckle.
There was something innocent about it, and it was hard not to find it endearing. She knew the wings were a new addition to the mare that lay in front of her, but it was still awfully funny how she didn’t have any more control over them than a filly would.
Spitfire stretched her form over the soft mattress, almost feline-like. Her wings sprouted to life as she stretched them out, too. It felt amazing after a good night’s rest. The captain’s wings were larger than that of an average pegasus’, which allowed her greater flight times and speed. It saved her points in endurance, too, because she didn’t have to exert as much energy as some of the other ponies.
This advantage was a tremendous help in her line of work. Plus, it was even better for keeping her warm.
After glancing at the window, Spitfire realized that it was far too early to wake up her student. It was bound to be cold outside, and low temperatures cause muscles to tense up, increasing the likelihood of an injury. Twilight Sparkle wasn’t prepared for different conditions. Not yet.
So, Spitfire decided she could use some time to herself. She tiptoed over to the window, pushed it open, and let herself out. The cold air woke her up and made her feel alive. Her wings carried her up, up, up… She didn’t know where she was going, but it was relaxing.
Eventually she settled back, clasping her hooves underneath her head, and allowing her wings to take her backwards. The wind through her mane, through the creases in every feather of her wings, rustling against her fur… It was amazing. Unicorns and earth ponies had no idea what they were missing out on. She wouldn’t give her wings up for the world.
Spitfire mused to herself about the past couple of days. She wondered if she’d been too callous on the princess, if maybe she should let up. She remembered how she learned how to fly: A strict teacher who ingrained into her mind every single vocabulary term associated with flying by forcing her to rattle them off while she tried to get off the ground. Not only that, but when she messed up, she would be punished.
It was tough, but it was what made her into such a formidable flyer. Determination and the want from within to succeed.
That was what she needed from Twilight Sparkle.
And—ha!—that chicken costume! Oh, that was a laugh. Spitfire smiled to herself. The attire did indeed have a purpose besides looking silly and a little bit cute. The material she asked Rarity to make it out of was very breathable, and lightweight. It conformed to the wearer’s body on the inside, helping to perfect any movements you make and to create the least amount of resistance possible. Not only that, but it had an air bubble, trapped within the fabric. It helped keep you airborne, and made it easier for you to lift off.
Like Spitfire had told Twilight, it was necessary. She was being harsh on her, but she needed to be. Everything had a purpose. As a teacher, she had her own methods… But as a pony…
“Woah! Spitfire?!”
Oops. Cover blown.
The sound of air being displaced as the pegasus dashed over to her left a sour taste in Spitfire’s mouth. The peaceful morning flight was out.
Spitfire righted herself to meet the pony who had addressed her. She hadn’t thought anypony would be out and about at five in the morning.
“Wow, my Wonderbolt sense really was tingling!” the mare chattered excitedly, “Have you finally come to enlist me?”
Oh, right, Spitfire remembered this pony. It was Rainbow Dash. “Sorry, kiddo, maybe next time.”
“Kiddo?” Rainbow Dash’s nose crinkled up. Moments later, her eyes lit up. She clasped her hooves together and said quietly to herself, “She called me kiddo!”
Spitfire was not a stranger to admirers. She did not reply to Rainbow, and rather focused on the sun behind her.
Rainbow Dash said, “So what are you doing here, then, if not for me? Oh! Is there a show?! Where? When? I want to see it! Wonderbolts show, here I come!”
The mare pumped a hoof into the air.
Spitfire thought it was funny how this pony was acting around her. She ran a hoof through her mane, still slightly messy from when she’d gotten up that morning. “No, I’m afraid not. I’m here on business, actually, but it’s not worth mentioning. What are you doing up so early, anyway?”
Rainbow Dash glowed with happiness at the prospect of her idol asking a question about her. “I was just taking care of my duties around the town, cloud-busting and all. Taking care of crime and helping out any ponies who needed me. Cleaning up the streets,” she boasted.
Spitfire doubted that there were any ponies walking around town at this hour, and doubted even more that Rainbow Dash had gotten up early to bust clouds and clean the streets. She didn’t know her very well, but she could tell that much. Bags were under Rainbow’s eyes.
“Well, kid, why don’t you go back and get some sleep. Heroes need rest, too.”
Spitfire just wanted it to be silent again. Rainbow Dash hesitated, but finally smiled.
“Oh, well, thanks! You've got a point. Um, yeah, I guess I could do that,” she smiled awkwardly as she spoke. “How long will you be in Ponyville?”
“As long as it takes.”
“Oh… Well, see you around?” Rainbow Dash waited, vulnerable and nervous. Spitfire felt that the conversation had been leaning on her the whole time, and the pressure was annoying. She decided to let the pegasus have some peace.
“Yeah, see ya.”
Rainbow beamed, another sun to rival that of the one set in the horizon, before she nodded and flew off. She could improve her form, and her speed could still be maximized. The pegasus had not yet reached her full potential.
At this point in time, Spitfire felt it was time to return to the library. The cool air had already begun to fill with warmth, and the Wonderbolt had found peace that morning. She was prepared to take the next step in Twilight’s training.
Breathing and strength exercises.
Spitfire went ahead and flew back to her current residence. She decided to push herself for the fun of it, and went as fast as she could. It felt great, she hadn’t been able to fly like this in what felt like ages. She rarely participated in the Wonderbolt derbies, and even when she did, she’d throw the race and let one of her teammates win. Everypony already knew her name, so there was no point.
Spitfire was perched back on the windowsill in what she counted as eight and a half seconds. Pleased, she let her wings rest at her sides. Her eyes fell upon a bed now devoid of princesses. It had been made neatly, without a single crease, the pillows stacked perfectly.
The Wonderbolt decided this was to be expected.
She hopped down and closed the window behind her, drawing the curtains. Footsteps sounded outside of the bedroom, so Spitfire trotted to meet them. They were quick and light steps, obviously being taken by someone of small stature with short legs. The way they struck the ground was not hoof-like; there was no clopping sound. It had to be the little dragon.
Spitfire’s deduction was proved as she stepped out into the hallway. Spike had a handful of towels in his claws, precariously tipping from side to side. He hadn’t noticed her over his predicament. Every step was a chore from the looks of it.
“Hey, dragon-man,” Spitfire called, causing the one addressed to almost lose his grip. He glared at her as soon as he had steadied himself.
“What’s the big idea?” he huffed out. “Are you trying to make me drop these?”
Spitfire walked over next to him and bent down. She spread her wings out, the tips reaching toward the ceiling. “Here, I can help you.”
Spike blinked. Then he blinked again. “What?”
“Just place the towels on my back and I’ll take them for you,” she said. “I’ve gotta do something around here, right?”
She smiled. Spike hesitated, but returned a smile of his own. His was thankful and genuine. He lifted the towels up, his arms shaking from the exertion, but was able to steady them onto her back. Spike let out a gust of air now that his arms had been freed.
Spitfire had expected the towels to be much heavier than they actually were. She positioned her wings to ensure they kept the tower on her back straight.
“Thanks!” Spike said, stretching his arms over his head.
Spitfire nodded. “Where did you say these were going?”
“To the bathroom,” he replied, pointing down the hallway. “It’s the last room on the right. We just put them in the cabinet space. I’m going to go downstairs and work on breakfast, how do home-made donuts sound?”
“Lovely,” Spitfire said, “I’ll be down in a moment.”
Spike and Spitfire shared another smile, and the dragon skipped down the steps with an extra bounce in his step. Spitfire didn’t realize she could make someone so happy with such a simple gesture, but it was a rewarding feeling.
Spitfire took her time down the hallway, to ensure she didn’t mess up the towels propped atop her. It wasn’t too difficult a task.
Eventually she reached the door Spike had said belonged to the bathroom. As she approached, she noticed steam billowing out from underneath the door. It was warm on her hooves. Something else caught Spitfire’s attention, however.
Somepony was singing in the shower.
Spitfire couldn’t tell what the words were, but felt that they were beautiful. She wasn’t a fan of music or singing, but this tune was so melodic, it felt as if this mare had reached for the heavens and actually obtained a piece of it with her voice.
Is this Twilight Sparkle? she wondered, fascination creeping into her.
Spitfire listened for a few more moments before she finally found it in her to move. She decided she had to finish this task with the towels, and then she would return to Spike. She wouldn’t alert Twilight that she had heard her singing in the shower, that would just be weird.
So, Spitfire pushed open the door quietly, steam hitting her in the face. It felt inviting, but not nearly as much so as the singing. It was even more amazing with the door open.
The Wonderbolt stepped into the restroom, searching for the cabinet space the dragon had mentioned. It was even closer to the shower.
Spitfire stepped toward it. She opened the doors and stuffed the towels inside. Spitfire didn’t dare glimpse toward the pony showering, and once she had finished her task, all but flew out. Twilight was none the wiser.
Once outside, Spitfire finally found it in her to breathe. She didn’t realize she’d been holding her breath.
What just happened? she wondered. Spitfire swallowed the lump in her throat and dismissed it. So Twilight knew how to sing really well. Big deal. Spitfire rested her wings against her side despite jitters.
She wanted to go out for another flight to get some fresh air, but knew it was better not to. Instead, she trotted away from the bathroom and down the stairs, where the scent of something baking hit her. Even though she could not hear Twilight singing, it was still in her mind.
Spike was munching on a gem at his seat, wearing Spitfire’s fedora once again. He must have really liked it.
But once he saw her, he pulled the jewel away and waved, “Hey, Spitfire! Everything go okay?”
“Yeah, of course,” Spitfire said, smiling to reassure him.
Spike nibbled on the red stone fervently. “Great! Thanks for your help. Twilight was all like ‘we need clean towels, Spike!’ this morning and made me do the laundry… I dunno what the big rush was, really. I mean, today is laundry day; it would have gotten done eventually. Like, what’s more important, laundry or breakfast? I bet it’s ‘cause she wanted to shower.”
The dragon popped the rest of the gem into his mouth and swallowed. “So was she in there?”
Spitfire tried not to think too much about it. She only said, “Yeah.”
“I knew it!” he exclaimed. He pumped a fist into the air with too much excitement. Spike’s smile turned devious. “She’s always doin’ that.”
“Telling you to do something?”
“No, showering. Who does that? I just take a bath once a week. It gets the job done, I tell ya.” Spitfire’s eyes bugged out of her head at the concept. He didn’t seem to notice the reaction she had broadcasted.
Yuck.
Spike got up and went over to the oven, slipping on pink oven mitts. He pulled out a rack full of donuts, and began to put icing and sprinkles on them. The heat of the tray and the donuts didn’t seem to bother him one bit.
“Oh, donuts?”
Spitfire almost jumped. At the top of the staircase stood Twilight Sparkle. She was smiling really widely as she trotted down the staircase. She too had a bounce in her gait.
Spitfire could hear it now. Her voice even when she wasn’t singing was a chime in itself.
“Yup!” chirped Spike. “I was feeling like sweet this morning. Do you think Rarity would like one?”
“I think she would love it.” Twilight took a seat next to Spitfire, directing a smile towards her. “Good morning to you, Captain! I noticed you weren’t here when I got up. Where’d you go?”
Spitfire swallowed. “Just, uh, out flying around. You know the drill… More importantly, did you do the morning exercises?”
“Yes ma’am!” Twilight saluted. She was in such a good mood this morning. “What is our next lesson about? I’m eager to learn!”
Spike handed Spitfire a plate with two donuts on it, and two for Twilight. The donuts were a pale yellow, with purple icing and darker purple and pink sprinkles. They looked delicious. Twilight’s were similar, but with yellow sprinkles instead.
Spitfire said, “We have to continue working on your strength and your breathing. I have some new ideas for exercises.”
She munched on a donut thoughtfully. It felt warm and delicate in her mouth, and it gave her an excuse to keep quiet. Twilight took a bite of her own, smiling. She was not opposed to what Spitfire had said.
Eventually, after Spike had inhaled his own meal, he excused himself for his own venture to the restroom. Twilight joked about him not getting out of the bathtub for the next seven hours, to which Spitfire laughed. Twilight even mentioned that there would be no hot water for the whole town. Spitfire laughed harder.
Spitfire calmed herself down long enough to ask if Twilight was ready for training. Twilight was more than ready, apparently, because at the question she jumped up into the air.
“And for the chicken suit?”
Twilight was a little bit less enthused at the mention of it.
“Don’t look like that, the suit actually has properties embedded into it,” Spitfire said, unable to stop herself. Why was she revealing so much unnecessary information? “It helps with flight. The materials I had it made out of are special. Like I said before, everything has a purpose.”
Twilight brightened up. “Really?”
“Yes. And isn’t it fun?”
“I think I would have more fun if you were the one wearing it.”
Spitfire pretended to be insulted. “Oh, please!” She was having too much fun with this. “Well, maybe one day I’ll get one, you never know. I don’t think it would suit me, really.”
Twilight nodded, smiling slyly. She went upstairs and returned with a bag—the one she would be keeping the chicken suit in. Spitfire got into her own outfit, trench coat and fedora (that Spike conveniently left on the table), and the two trailed outside.
There wasn’t a whole lot of conversation going on between them; Spitfire kept getting lost in her thoughts. She hadn’t even noticed the lack of speech herself. Twilight didn’t mind.
In the field, Spitfire made Twilight repeat her wing exercises. She was getting much, much better already. Spitfire had her go really, agonizingly slow, and then had her do so really quickly. Her form was improving. It was almost to the point where she could fly on those wings… Provided she had the strength for it.
That was what was next, anyway.
Pleased, Spitfire had her stop. Twilight was fixing to put on the chicken suit, but the Wonderbolt stopped her.
“Not yet.”
After seeing Twilight’s confused expression, her eyebrows drawn together, she explained. “The chicken suit’s purpose was to help you when you start flying. It cushions your falls and helps keep you in the air. It actually was helping you when you were doing your wing-ups yesterday. But today? You need to do them alone. No crutch.”
“But wait, why did you make me wear it yesterday, then?” Twilight crossed her forelegs over her chest.
“Two reasons… One, because I thought it would be fun. And two, because it would help you to begin with. But I don’t think you need it right now.”
Spitfire got down on the ground, prompting Twilight to do the same. Spitfire sensed that her companion wanted more of an explanation than she was being given.
“The strength you hold in your wings is one of your greatest assets as a pegasus.” Spitfire pushed herself up on her wings, folded her hooves behind her, and proceeded to do wing-ups with speed that Twilight didn’t think possible. She didn’t break a sweat.
“Unbending will, determination, and practice. That is how you get there. Now, do them with me.”
Twilight nodded, feeling confident. She assumed the position Spitfire did, and pushed herself up. After doing her first wing-up, she could feel the difference from yesterday. She had felt so amazing about it yesterday, but now… Her wings burned.
Spitfire watched as Twilight winced and shook lightly. “Hey, it gets easier. Just get through your first couple and you know you’ll be fine.”
Twilight did five wing-ups and was getting to her sixth, when her wings gave out. They ached.
“What a difference…”
“I know. But come on, you can do it. Let’s try again.”
A whole day passed and Twilight didn’t get to put on the chicken suit once. The sun was already setting, and all they had done was practice wing-ups. Twilight had gotten to a solid seventeen. And Spitfire had even had her do a few different exercises.
One was spreading her wings against resistance. Spitfire had tied her wings down loosely, and Twilight was to get her wings out of their containment. She succeeded eventually. Another exercise she had Twilight do was opening one wing, while keeping the other one down. It was much harder than it sounded, because the other wing would keep trying to go up. Spitfire had said it was to help her grow accustomed to moving her wings around. She even had her twist her wings around in all sorts of ways, which pegasi do when under adverse weather conditions. Oh, and who could forget the breathing exercises?
It was all fun, except the part where Twilight had to keep going back to doing wing-ups. Even after the training, her wings burned.
But there was something Twilight was enjoying most of all. As a student who’d been studying friendship for a long time now, it was thrilling. She felt that she could become good friends with Spitfire with the way things were going.
That night, Spitfire went to take a shower, and complained that there really was no more hot water. Spike slinked away, blushing and avoiding her gaze. Twilight giggled. And as Spitfire gave Spike a smile and Spike grinned back, Twilight couldn’t help smiling, too.
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Good to see the story still lives.
It's back!
I thought you had left the site since you havent been on for so long, but it's so nice to see that you're still writing. Anyway, I liked this chapter. It was a fun read and I'm curious as to what will happen next.
5352805
5352810
Indeed it is.
I am back though, and glad you enjoyed it!
I've read lots of your work Blue Dragon and all of them are amazing my computer is still down but still i continue to write. You inspired me to write with such amazing stories mine may never be good as yours but still no one can compete with such amazing stories I love them.
5352861
Aww, that's really sweet. I'm so happy to hear that I've inspired you!
Why so professional?
I'll have to put this bad boy on my RL. Haven't read a ship fic with Spitfire in eons.
still cant wait to see how rainbow reacts.
Oh hey, this updated. Yay!
Anyways, I'm gonna say that the main issue I can see is pacing. You're doing a lot of summarizing rather than detailing things individually.
For example:
This is summarizing. It makes the story looked rushed and almost like you couldn't be bothered with details.
It would've read better if it was more like this:
Now, the thing is, summarizing does have a place. Every story has less than exciting parts. The parts no one really wants to read but are needed for the story to function. This is when summarizing should be used.
However, this is a story focusing on a romance, and the relationship between two characters. Because this is the point of the story, every interaction between these characters needs to be detailed and explored in depth. You don't have to make a novel out of each scene, but breathe life into each interaction they have. Show that you really feel affection for this pairing and the characters involved, and demonstrate it with extra detail. We don't need to know the specifics on where Spitfire had left her fedora. That can be ignored entirely.
In other words, slow down a bit, add more detail to the character interactions, and consider what other details you can ignore or skim over. A story like this should be in-depth character interactions connected by summary (for boring parts), humor, and internal thoughts/self-reflection.
All that said, I still enjoy reading the story. Spitfire is believable as a celebrity that has managed to avoid arrogance. She is a little temperamental, yet patient and fair. She has a sense of humor despite her stern behavior. In other words, she's a dead ringer for what little we know of canon Spitfire, but with the added bonus of character development as provided by this story.
It's also quite humorous at times. I laughed pretty good at Spike's cringeworthy admission of his bathing habits. Bonus points since he was wearing a fedora at the time. All he needed was a neckbeard.
YAY! New update!
I really enjoyed reading this chapter. I especially liked the part where Rainbow Dash acts like a fangiirl around Spitfire. Keep up the good work and update soon because I can't get enough of this story.
5353032
Thank you for the criticism, I really do appreciate it very much. You do have a point! From what I understand, no one wants to read a story that goes on for a very long time about unnecessary details. I actually felt that I had been too descriptive in some scenes that weren't pertinent to the actual story's plot (at least the bare-bones of it), and was trying to even it out with one of the excerpts you picked. I've been trying to improve showing/telling, and, in particular, instances when it is important to decide which is the better choice. I had decided that the scenes you pointed out as summarizing were times I should add variety, and pull back into a more tell-y environment.
Of course, I could be totally wrong and doing this completely incorrectly. In which case I will still take your advice to heart and try to flesh everything out. Regardless, I am glad that you are enjoying the story and took the time to tell me what you thought. Thank you.
5352992
I hope that you enjoy it whenever you get around to reading it.
5353092
I'm really glad that you enjoyed the story! I will definitely be working on the next chapter within the next couple of days.
5353145 I'll be reading it once I finish my finals. =]
If it's good, I might review it :P
5353170
I hate finals. I have them in two weeks...
That would be cool. Reviews are always good for improvements for the author, and in some cases (when it's balanced with things the author did well), a boost for morale. Really though, I do hope you like the story.
Captain, being Spitfire's title, should be capitalized. An eay way to remember is "the captain" as opposed to "Hello, Captain."
5353440
Thank you, I will fix it. I am aware of the rule, it was just a simple mistake I must have missed when writing.
5353211
And thank you for reading.
Interesting story. I like it and can't wait for future chapters.
Donuts don't sound like a healthy breakfast
Woot update, I must read when I get a chance to do so!
Glad to see you're still working on this; I really enjoy reading it.
Hm, the tone of this chapter feels slightly different, in a good way. Not that it was bad before, but the pacing feels a bit slower. For a romance like this, that is very much a plus. Well, can't upvote or favorite again, so...
Goddess's I am so happy this story is back!!! you have no idea how much I love this story!!!
5354276
Okay, I appreciate that you explained yourself. I really do. The chicken suit was actually explained a little more thoroughly in the chapter with which was published yesterday, after receiving previous criticisms on it. It did have a purpose, if you had read just a bit further, besides just being used for fun.
Younger kids exaggerate punishments. It wasn't literally torture, we just know how much Twilight values her magic (it being her element and special talent), and the way I imagined it, she would have hated it. Further, it's not draining her of her physical prowess, it is just limiting her as a unicorn (taking away the magic) so she can fully develop as a pegasus pony. Another purpose behind it has to do with Twilight's mindset; Spitfire has been trying to make her think like a pegasus in order to fly, so relying on her magic and having it on the backburner was not something that would have been productive.
This other point was also elaborated upon in the next chapter. Being a jerk to superiors does have consequences, but it's more along the lines of the way she thinks it's best to teach Twilight. But I honestly don't think I portrayed her as being a jerk to Spike. She wasn't trying to be rude, and didn't realize the "little dragon" comments were getting on his nerves. Not to mention that she lets him wear the fedora. Plus Celestia (who is higher up than Twilight) gave her this assignment.
I really am not fond of defending my work like this, but I think you have the wrong impression about some of those points, and I don't think you gave it enough of a chance. Had you read just a little bit further, it would have made more sense. But I am not asking that of you.
Thank you for reading.
5354379
5353676
Thanks, I'm really happy to hear that.
5354096
Thank you! That may have to do with the break I had, but I did decide to slow it down some more. I'm glad to hear you think it has made it better.
5353988
That's great to hear, I hope you'll continue to enjoy it.
5353813
They aren't, but how else do ponies get such vibrant colors? Kidding, of course.
5353830
I hope that you enjoy it whenever you get the chance to read it.
5355036 Also, I'd just like to point out how much of an idiot I am right now.
I was going to ask if you were going to ship Spitfire with Twilight, as she seemed to be growing quite fond of her student.
Then I realized this was a romance. And I read your bio.
And I feel dumb
Just thought I'd share this with you.
5355036
Having skimmed the next chapter, I still have most of these issues.
The chicken suit remains badly handled.
1. When Spitfire's only request was a chicken suit made of a certain fabric, it strains credibility that Rarity just happened to make something that actually had all these properties.
2. There's still no reason for it to be an actual chicken suit except to humiliate Twilight.
3. The way you just dropped it in the next chapter feels like a ham-fisted retcon.
The ring is not helpful. Twilight has shown no indication that she can use magic to help her fly, so forbidding her from using it will have no impact on her flying ability. What, is she going to start using her wings to do everything?Not that you've shown. Even if Twilight exaggerated(not conveyed in the text), you have made in clear that it is a very unpleasant experience for her. This would be highly distracting. Also, it will just waste time throughout the day as Twilight performs all her day-to-day tasks with magic. So, useless for stated purpose, distracting, time-wasting and overall a negative experience to no purpose.
Spike has been quite clear that he would like her to use his name. He has angrily reminded her of it on a few occasions. The fact that the assignment was from Celestia doesn't matter to my point, I was talking about after this assignment when Twilight will find herself in command of Spitfire. Given that Spitfire doesn't seem to know anything about her, she should be smart enough to realize that if she makes training an unpleasant experience Twilight could just decide that she should not be running the Wonderbolt Academy and be perfectly justified in removing her.
Finally, it doesn't really work to have the thing that makes Spitfire's training work be very basic exercise. Rainbow Dash is an athlete, it is unbelievable that she had not done anything to strengthen Twilight's wings.
I have little sympathy for your dislike of defending your story, as I don't believe I said anything untrue.
Edit: Also, Spitfire's interaction with Rainbow Dash makes her even more unlikeable.
5355806
Thank you for taking the time to look over the next chapter, and to reply to what I said. You do make some good points, and I will consider them. If you notice the little notes in a few of the chapters (the revision dates), as well as the time between the most recent publication dates, I am actually in the process of fixing some of these things, and am not entirely satisfied myself with the re-writes and revisions I've made thus far. However, I don't think what I have now was enough to warrant a down-vote. These are issues that can be fixed, and some of these points feel very subjective. I personally don't think the characters would behave entirely the way you think they should based on what you wrote.
Please don't think I was looking for sympathy. I call my stories works because that's what they are; I am constantly having to fix things and work on them. We grow as writers like that, and sympathy has no place here.
In any case, I do thank you. I hope I haven't come off badly in this exchange, because I sincerely wasn't trying to be. I really do appreciate what you have done here. If it is any consolation to you I am (and have been these past few weeks) editing and revising the story at its core, trying not to mutilate it for readers who have already read through it.
This chapter is great! The small changes to the story made a big difference to me! Thank you so much for updating this with such a good chapter!
As always, I hope for more soon.
Nice chapter
Good chapter
Singing Twilight will make every mere who hers it fall for her, maybe not immediately but eventually.
wow Spike is kind of like me when it comes to hygiene only i take two showers a week anyways
Looking forward to more and again welcome back
~Tobben
Good chapter. I better go now though... Fox is my editor... People need to think i am at least trying to update my stories. The way Spitfire is now is much better than before. Those personality changes made it a better read. Though the way she treats dash is a bit iffy, Dash saved her life after all.
5369670
I will consider that and likely make a few changes, thank you very much.
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The way I see it, flying is specific to pegasi. Though alicorns can fly and Twilight is an alicorn... The alicorn Princesses came after the unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies were already around, so they are more established. Learning how to fly like an alicorn doesn't sound quite right anyway, at least to me. Besides, learning like a pegasus--that's more along the lines of starting from the basics and working up to incorporate the other elements (AKA magic).
5371915 glad you appreciate the input.
I see what you did with the donuts
Well played
those donuts sound yummy andi hope more comes soon
When is the new chapters coming out?
Where are the new chapters ?