It's been a year since Twist earned her cutie mark and a year since she talked to Apple Bloom. It doesn't matter, right? After all, she has Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon as friends. They're so much more fun then Apple Bloom ever was!
Chapters (5)
- Member Since 1st Jan, 2014
- offline last seen Dec 30th, 2015
Luna1337
Say my name out loud and double over in laughter.
Luna1337
Joined 1st Jan, 2014 ·
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That was pretty good so far. And yay Twist gets a story where she actually has friends! xD
That sounds like a challenge...
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And boy that was way rude of Sweetie and Scoots. And for shame Apple Bloom for all a sudden appearing in Twist's life like that just to eat her candy.
Looking forward to more.
I did wonder what happened to Twist after Apple Bloom ditched her.
I can't wait to read the rest!
Second chapter almost nearing editing stage! Yay!
Your story is now part of the Twist group!
i.imgur.com/RVM1x8i.png
I look forward to seeing where this goes.
Hmm... Very interesting indeed.
I'll have to favorite this and wait for more!
The next chapter is up! Slightly shorter, but then enough it does what I need it to do. :D
Chapter three might not be until tomorrow, since it's fairly late and I have math to do.
Interesting new development
Might, like, pace yourself a bit more and, like, maybe tone down, like, the amount of times they, like, totally say the word "like" and stuff, like, if that's okay with you.
But aside from going overboard a bit with the "like", I'd be okay waiting more than a day for bigger and more fleshed paced chapters. 1k is like two youtube comments (pre-google+ at least) so not much to chew on there. But this chapter did what it wanted to do. Interesting use of Scootaloo there, I'll wait and see what you do with that.
Scootaloo has a side to it that I'll get into later. And I'm not really good with long writing. Longest I ever got was around 8500 words and that took almost a month. xD Oh well. I made myself write 1000. I can write longer.
(For sharp-eyed observers, I'm aware they left during recess. >.< I'll fill the plot hole in maybe two chapters or so.)
Thith thtory ith interethting tho far! I'm liking it.
So Scootaloo used to be evil!
I'll go for 1250 words this chapter, adding 250 words each chapter. How does 2500 words per chapter sound?
3721320 Sounds like this story will continue to be awesome regardless of size of its chapters, long as it fits the roles you want.
Short chapters = typically faster updates
Long chapters = slow updates.
Just do what you feel is *right* for the scene you want to tell, like that last chapter. I just complain I want more...MORE... because good stories make me anxious
And welcome to the group!
This story is pretty interesting. Most stories (as well as the actual show) tend to depict DT and SS either as two-dimensional antagonists or sometimes potential targets for redemption (so they can earn the CMC's forgiveness and friendship and become better ponies). Rarely do we get to see them from their own POV - as two kids who consider their behavior justified given their past experiences, and are actually capable of being friendly with somepony they want to be friends with. Few people in the world actually consider themselves to be the villains - everyone is a hero in their own story.
Also, it's an interesting touch that the CMC actively try to justify their behavior in order to avoid the realization that they're the bad apples here. Scootaloo thinks that it's rude not to allow them to stay, even though they walked in uninvited and ate the candy without permission. And Apple Bloom is fully aware that she basically ditched Twist for her new friends, but tries to shift the blame onto Twist by pretending that she wouldn't want to be friends anyway (even though Twist explicitly said "We can still be friends, right?").
For those who are curious, she's not going to get her cutie mark just like that. She still has to figure out how it ties into a livelihood, the exact details of her special talent, etc etc.
This shows Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon as three dimensional.
3735565
Whenever I see a flat character in the show, I have an urge to round them out. :D
The story of Scootaloo and the squirrel made me crack up.
"If she even knew what she was good at in the first place!" I say to myself. She has a lot of style and grace. Where her talents lie? Could be any number ah' place!
This was a really cute chapter. LOVED IT.
I don't know why, but that Diamond being hung up on Button Mash felt so familiar. It is instantly my favorite scene. She needs to work on her game, literally!
Also, I really loved her sitting on the bed just casually eating her muffin while assessing the now waking mess of a filly on the ground, and that Silver Spoon holding that cup like a teddy bear was just d'aww all over the place.
You really managed to toss in so much cute in such a small amount of time. Combo heavy this chapter!
I loved Scoot's story. I feel bad for her though, she clearly isn't too pleased about her parents being away so much. But it gives her a lot of freedom I guess, very independent filly. Reminds me of my favorite character from that fox kids show anime DoReMi. Poor girl had a Dad as her only parent who worked very hard to give his daughter everything. Scoot's parents I have no idea what they are like, but in DoReMi the dad was pretty awesome, his daughter was totally a Scootaloo.
Anyhow, I think I just re-fell for this story again. That potential is starting to shine a lot brighter!
That was a lot of stuff to digest. Would be be hilarious if those ever were to become her canon parents. x3
I didn't really get the point of the Snips and Snails bushes scene though as to why Apple Bloom felt like checking on what they were up to. Maybe I'm overlooking something from a previous chapter? O.o
Yeesh, Twist and DT are doing some naughty things. From cupcakes to breaking and entering someequine's home along with theft. What are these ponies up to, I have no idea!
To the next chapter and BEYOND!
They're playing a prank on Snips, Snails, and the CMC. xP Snips and Snails think they're in on it.
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Nice chapter. Can't say there was a thing in this I didn't like.
I can just see Rainbow Dash being one of those obnoxious spoiler people...
And those nice little elementary-school word problems...I say "nice" because they aren't geometry or calculus or proofs. *has different perspective after being in school for a looooong time*
I was just rejected from Equestria Daily, so I'm going to be going through and systematically addressing their concerns. If you notice anything different, it's because of that.
I enjoyed reading your story! In fact, I featured it in a blog post of mine. It's not much, but I hope it'll get you a couple of extra views. Keep up the good work!
'Kay...so I lost the EQD review, so I can't make the rest of the changes.
SO NO MORE HIATUS
This story is 100% Diamond Cutters Approved!
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3718137 that was surreal. I mean how the CMC just showed up suddenly. It's something I would expect the writers of the show or comics to do.
I guess that Twist's mom didn't know Bloom had ditched Twist and was just expecting two fillies to show up for the slumber party and didn't question the third. Or Twist told her mom she was bring two new friends over and just accepted Applebloom as the third party.
3719020 you get big Earth Pony Silver Spoon hugs for that remarkable Twist impression!
well that was abrupt. I don't get why Cheerilee called the six of them over in the first place.
Oh and
as a thief,
I like it!
3769608 I think DT and Twist stole the cloak so they could pose as mare coming to be Silver Spoon's governess. Either that or I don't get the joke they were playing on Snips and Snails at all.
3790368 there is one thing I don't like..
the fact that it's canceled just when we learn Silver Spoon has serious self esteem issues with her parents.
but this got me the biggest laugh of the entire story-