Clean
Not fully ready to accept help from her friends directly, Rainbow Dash decided to try to get some information herself. She headed to the library one night, and was greeted by Twilight.
“Oh, hello Rainbow.” She eyed Rainbow carefully. Twilight was very aware of Rainbow Dash’s recent, unhealthy appearance, but like all the other ponies, she was unsure whether or not Dash was getting better or not.
“Hey Twilight.” Rainbow looked across a shelf of books, looking for anything that may be helpful. Twilight was a little concerned by how quiet Rainbow Dash was being... But she decided it was for the better to just let her browse in peace. She quietly stepped away and headed upstairs, leaving Rainbow Dash alone below.
It was relieving to Rainbow Dash that Twilight didn’t really ask any questions. It might have been difficult for her to get out of explaining herself again. She continued to look for a book to help her, but after a while, she gave up, accepting that she was the only pony ever who had her problem.
Dash returned home after failing to find a solution to her problem. When she got home, she felt ill. She had not even eaten much that day, but she still had a nagging feeling that she had eaten too much. Fighting the urges, she stepped back outside...
At this point, it wasn’t just something she did on occasion to empty her stomach when she ate too much. It wasn’t something she did to keep slim. It was nothing less than an addiction, and it was just as deadly as any other addiction.
It wasn’t long before she was in the bathroom, letting the tiny bit of substance her stomach had left into the bathtub. She screamed out in pain between heaves, no longer able to bear it. She broke down into a heavy sob, her hoof still halfway down her throat.
“RAINBOW!” She heard Applejack shout again from behind her. This time, she wrote it off as another hallucination, and curled up on the floor, sobbing helplessly. If ever there was a rock bottom, this was it for her.
“DASHIE!” Pinkie Pie’s voice. The rainbow-clad pegasus was too far gone to notice their cries. She was lost by now, and so she began to drift away from consciousness... Then suddenly, she felt herself moving. She opened her eyes to see the bathtub growing further and further away. Soon, she was out of the bathroom, being dragged away by an unseen force. Finally, she was in her living room, flat on her back.
Her vision was very blurry, but she could faintly see a glass of water floated over her in a purple glow. It lowered to her mouth and poured a small sip of water. Dash accepted it, and swallowed it. It felt good... Very refreshing after what she’d been through.
As Dash’s vision cleared up, she could see Twilight Sparkle standing directly over her to her right, and Applejack too her left. Fluttershy was standing beside Applejack, then Pinkie Pie beside Fluttershy. Lastly, she noticed Rarity, standing a short distance behind Twilight, noticeably shocked and disturbed by the whole ordeal.
Rainbow tried to speak, but she was too weak, and her throat was too sore. She made an effort to roll over and get on her hooves, but Fluttershy laid a gentle hoof on her chest. “You really should rest...” she said. “You’ve been through so much...”
“After you left the library, I was worried about you.” Twilight explained. “So I ran and got the others and used that spell that lets us walk on clouds. We hurried up to try to talk to you, to see what was wrong. Then we noticed your door was wide open and we could hear you... So we kinda came in uninvited.”
It took everything she had in her, but Rainbow Dash allowed a slight smile. It was overwhelming to her, in a good way, that her friends were so supportive, and so kind, even though they should be angry and disappointed.
Applejack and Twilight gently lifted Rainbow up and laid her on her couch. “Now, for your own good...” Twilight started, hovering over Dash. “We don’t feel that you should be left alone for a while.” Rainbow gave her best effort at a nod.
“There’s plenty of room for ya at Sweet Apple Acres.” Applejack offered. “We’ll keep a close eye on ya.”
“If Applejack’s out of town for whatever reason, you can stay with me at the library. I’m sure there’s also room in Fluttershy’s cottage if we need it.”
For the first time in a long time, Rainbow Dash felt something akin to... Happiness. She was calm, and relaxed (though still weak and in a lot of pain.) She had tried so hard to make everypony like her, but she understood now that she was being stupid. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if the entire world hates you, as long as you have a few good friends. And that’s exactly what she had.
It was a little over a month before Rainbow returned to her home. She visited every room in her house, feeling a little good to be back home after all this time. Finally, she stepped inside the last room, her bathroom.
As soon as she stepped inside, she was hit by a wave of cruel memories. She could almost see herself curled up inside the bathtub, sobbing. The room as a whole had a vial stench left over from her many episodes. The mirror was stained with... Who knows what. As she walked by the mirror, she caught a look at her face.
It was rounder than before. She looked down and saw that her once concave stomach had filled out slightly, and her ribs were barely visible now. Her legs were thicker than before too.
Look at you. You’re disgusting.
She’d heard the little voice in her head once more. The mocking little voice. The voice that had driven her over edge so many times. Her voice.
She stepped inside the bathtub and collapsed to her knees. She raised her hoof to her face and opened her mouth wide. However, just as her hoof touched her teeth, she stopped.
Her hoof stayed pressed gently against her front teeth for a good minute, while she stared blankly at it. Finally, she took her hoof away from her mouth, and used it to gently turn on the water. A small trickle of water came down from the showerhead. It slowly grew into a steady spray, which went over Rainbow.
Dash felt the water pour down her face and body. She felt her mane flatten over her back, and her tail grow heavy and flop to the ground. She felt the built up dirt fall from her mane. She shock her head, and her mane flopped side to side, shaking water off onto the walls.
Rainbow watched as the little remnants in the bathtub were washed away, along with several months of built up dirt from her coat. For the past few months, she’d developed a literal fear of her bathtub. The closest thing she had to a shower was flying into a river a few times.
At that moment, she felt cleaner than ever. Her troubles seemed to wash away, along with any remnants of her ill deeds. Physically, and emotionally, she felt cleaner than ever.
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Awsome fanfic. I've always liked happy endings.
wish it was a bit longer, but i still liked it nonetheless.
229864
I'd actually had a bit more planned, but didn't go through with it because it seemed to be such a good place to end it.
I feel like I don't see Rainbow the same way anymore.
I like it
If only it was that easy
You have just changed the way I see Rainbow Dash from now on, good job?
2165769
Yeah, nothing's ever that easy in the real world. Also, I'll take that as a complement
Ahhhh, is it over already? The ending to this chapter makes it appear that the story could be continued, but whatever, it's your story and so you have every right to end it when you see fit. I just wish the story was a bit longer, delving more into Rainbow Dash's psyche. The voice seemed to be controlling her, which would have made for some interesting back and forth conversations between her and it. This was a very good fanfic, one that I enjoyed. Still, I am depressed because I was planning on doing a story exactly like this, where Rainbow Dash is struggling with self-image issues and goes to extreme lengths to maintain a healthy weight and figure. Oh, well, I suppose I could have one of the others going through this, or I could have Rainbow Dash being anorexic.
Again, sorry to be the one pointing out errors in a powerful story, but you use the wrong word here.
vi·al
Noun
A small container, typically cylindrical and made of glass, used esp. for holding liquid medicines.
I believe you mean to use vile.
vile
Adjective
Extremely unpleasant.
Morally bad; wicked: "as vile a rogue as ever lived".
Synonyms
mean - base - villainous - nasty - foul - scurvy - sordid
This is very powerful. No more needs to be said. A well-deserved like and fav.
2394931
Yes I did mean to use vile. In general this story is in need of more editting. I'll try to do that if I get the time.
2394099
It does seem like there's a lot more I could do. I have plans for a continuation of sorts, but I haven't found the time to write it yet.
2412321 No problem. We all make mistakes.
@Prince Colgate
That's fine. Don't worry about it. Take as much time as you need. You can't rush art, after all. I look forward to reading the continuation of this story. :)
This story really made me think more about eating disorders in general. It really hits home with your use of RD as the character. The type of issue that you addressed has been overlooked by most teens and adults because they simply don't know how widespread it is. This was an overall powerful story and I really enjoyed it.
2769260
Thank you for your kind words. Looking back on it over a year later, I'm actually very proud of this piece. I feel like I should do more work like this in the future.
2775619
Ya know, you're right. This is a very late response, and you've probably forgotten about me by now, but I think I'm gonna start writing more stories like this. Stories that express topics I believe in through ponies.
4508628
First I'm gonna finish this one. I don't really like the way it ended. I had talked about a spiritual sequel of sorts before, but I realized all it needs is a real final chapter. A few issues I didn't cover.
4508628 I hope I do not disappoint.
Wait....this fic is still alive!? I thought this died a looong time ago
happy to see you and this fic are still kicking.
Why would she throw up in the bathtub? What about the toilet?