• Member Since 23rd Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen Sunday

BrainLapse


T

Everypony has their breaking point, what happens when a pony reaches theirs? Who will get them back on the right track? But most of all will it be enough?

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 113 )

Oh boy.... The next chapter will greatly determin weather this is one of the most touching stories or one of the most disappointing......good luck.....

I agree with above poster

Wow, this is really good :fluttershbad: tehee!:heart:

Applejack needs more repeating kicks in the face.

18401
QFT (Quoted for Truth.)

This intrigues me.

.......really? I would get that applejack would find fluttershy being a lesbian unnatural and wrong but SAYING THAT FLUTTERSHY WAS TRYING TO CORRUPT HER!?!? Applejack would atleast have Tried to put it gently or have some other feelings other than disgust! Applejack is probably one of the most supportive of the mane six! And you make her out to be....Uggh!!!! Please....rewrite Applejacks dialogue....she wouldn't be cussing at rainbow as she flew away and.....I'm out of here.....

18422

Flip the desk, walk out of the room.

I personally think it's an interesting line of thought, hopefully the author will explore exactly why Applejack feels that way.

Let's see you write something and publish it and then we'll see what has to be said.

Savvy? :pinkiehappy:

18422

while i do agree that it does seem a bit harsh, it is a nice contrast to the 'perfect' world of equestria, to see that sometimes they have just as many problems as humans do, altho i do agree, i would appreciate it if it was toned down a bit

18422

I think it's quite believable that Applejack would respond in such cruel manner if she despises homosexuality as much as some individuals in reality do. It does not matter the time span a friendship has lasted, or the tranquility of the moment. If one hates homosexuality, it is safe to assume that their reaction to a love confession from a close friend would end in extreme negative responses.

Hey yall, sorry it took me so long to reply about this whole AJ reaction. The fact of the matter is I felt that AJ would react this way if it was the way she was raised. She's stubborn enough that if somepony came and questioned her ideals, she would begin to get aggressive. If you notice in the first chapter, she does not start pissed off, or even angry. Rainbow Dash shows up after Fluttershy and then begins to question everything. As for the cussing part, she was just in a fight and her opponent ran away in a manner she couldn't catch up. Of course she's gonna start doing something, and I felt that cussing is an appropriate response. So any other questions to my logic?:trixieshiftright:

It's not that part that have a problem with. It's the fact that it seems like Aj is just purly aggressive and insensitive to Futtershys feelings. I don't know, it just seens like she would be feeling more conflicted over finding that out about Fluttershy. Not just purely "Get away you freak!" if you develop more into AJ and have a nice big morality discussion later on, I'll be fine with it. But from what I'm seeing, your making AJ the unchanged bad guy. So if your doing that, then please take my first comment personally. (no One messes with my forvorite pony!:rainbowkiss:) if your planning on a great heartfelt story involving love, forgiveness, pie, and a lot of friendship...sorry for raging...I'll shut up now and continue reading....:fluttershyouch:

Well written, but dammit Fluttershy trying to hang herself is just depressing.:fluttershbad::flutter:fluttershbad:cry:

18582
Basically this is a things get better story, it's just that for things to get better, they need to be bad, and I might have went a little extreme with where I put their reactions, but I'm gonna stand by it.
18633
I completely agree. I feel like a dick for the fact that in the first chapter of both my stories, I've made Fluttershy cry. :fluttercry:

And as always feel free to message me with anyone who would like to be a pre-reader. Oh, and feel free to message me cause you love me or hate me, I'm fine with chatting with just about anyone.

I've looked over this, and this seems like it has the potential to become a great story. I'll be sending a more detailed PM of things to go over, since it's late, and I need to go to sleep.

So yeah, expect a message soon :D

Great concept, and you're carrying it out perfectly.

I can't help you right now, because I can't think of anything you would need. Keep on writing, champ!

However...

If you make Fluttershy cry one more time, I will high-five you.

In the face.

With a mallet.

Hard.

Repeatedly.

FOREVER. :flutterrage:

Other than that, good job!

29417
Ummmmmmmm. ouch?
but I kinda need to have Fluttershy cry more for plot movement...........:fluttershysad:
It makes me sad too, just I can't help if it makes the plot move

She was Fluttershy’s knight in shining armor, but it was clear that Rainbow did not see mares that way.

whoa whoa rainbow doesn't feel that way, yet she asked applejack? :rainbowderp: i think flutter has it backwards...:moustache:

Jesus.. flutter trying to commit suicide.. that's a fresh idea.

“It seems like that monster has tricked you too. Ah’m not surprised, considerin’ yew and her have known each other for so long. But don’t worry Sugarcube. I took care of that disgusting beast
.... yeah, luckily for you i have an open mind but i still have a border and you put your pinky toe on that border my friend. i shall continue reading

18557 yes just a tad, of course applejack is stubborn but even in the anime and all of the fan fics iv read shes only stubborn towards work and proving herself, and always someone to help another friend
and I've been in enough fights to understand the anger but usually all of the anger being released through pain and energy loss makes most of it go away and just makes you want to just be quiet and some of those fights led to my best friends that i have today , fighting is the most brutal way to get rid of tension as one of my closest friends i broke his glasses and hurt him, he hurt me mentally and physically. now we are great friends. :facehoof:

Hoo boy, this rewrite.

This rewrite.

I'm not sure what to say.

I know I now want to reach into my computer and strangle Applejack.

But still, this rewrite. Wow.

Keep going.

18557 actually, the way you wrote it, it's more like as soon as AJ realizes that shes serious, she just pours on the hate. I used to want to go to Equestria for ponies. Now I want to go murder Applejack.

34300
And now your wish has been granted

"Please sir, can I have some more?" :rainbowkiss:

34445
I'll see what I can do for ya

3p1k as always keep it up.

34445

Lol. That comment made me laugh.

Wow, fantastic. Im willing to ommit OOC AJ because this story is so fantastic. Please please don't stop writing:pinkiehappy:

cant wait for next one
and in my current state only one word will come out of my mouth
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR

I am simply in awe of your writing abilities. You're a genius with words.

I am loving this story! But I want Fluttershy to get better soon! Seeing her so hurt is heartbreaking :fluttercry:

34535
Wow thanks. I just kinda wrote this to get the feelings outta my head. But if you feel it's genius then thanks.
34539
I know what you mean

Oh God

I need more

Right now

Shitshitshitshitshit

Nice story, I can see the passion you took in imbuing this tale with such life. Aside from some minor spelling issues this story is mag-F**king-nificient, and I also caught some inspiration for a new story. I'm tracking and 5 stars. And hey, good shit:trixieshiftright:

I find myself imagining some truly hateful things happening to Applejack right now...

This is not good, 'cause I'm kinda working on a fanfic idea I had and this may or may not affect Applejack's fate in said fic:pinkiecrazy:

But, honest to god, this is a great story you've got going here. Even if it makes me want to beat you within an inch of your life for bringing Fluttershy such despair.

ok now that this chapter is out I just have one thing to say to you, HURRY UP AND WRITE THE NEXT ONE I CAN'T WAIT!!!!:flutterrage:
:raritydespair::applecry:
btw great story I'm really liking it so far.:twilightsmile:

34565
get in line, I think I've now gotten about four almost death threats for the Fluttershy stuff, not to mention all the AJ fans for thee whole bucking AJ in the face.
:ajbemused::trixieshiftright:
34758
Ummmmmmmm I will when the inspiration hits, which actually happened to be earlier today. :pinkiehappy:

[img]<a href='http://cheezburger.com/View/3967760896'><img class='event-item-lol-image' src='http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/9/14/eb253a10-29d0-4ebc-90af-8d736b9f8d6c.jpg' id='_r_a_3967760896' title="Please sir I want some more" alt="Please sir I want some more" /></a>[/img]

34952
Wow, really? Death threats? It saddens me deeply to read of the wonderful Fluttershy in this state, but... just, wow. Some people have issues.

Frankly I'd rather give this version of Applejack a strong talking to. I've actually SAID things like Applejack does here in the past - and to a friend, no less. They're words I regret and wish I had never spoken. I don't distance myself from the words - I said them, and I am to blame for having said them, no ifs, no buts. My views are more or less the polar opposite these days (I support full equality - I can't see any truly logical argument that justifies anything else that holds water).

...And that's why stories like these NEED to be told. People DO, sometimes, change their mind. If I hadn't changed my views already, this would have given me pause. Keep writing, it's a fantastic story, and I look forward to seeing it unfold.

35300
Well thank ya kindly. I completely support the messages told in this story, well the positive ones.

Right about now, all that sums up how I feel about this story is the following: "OMG I DESIRE MORE! GIVE ME MORE!" and I will do anything to help this story keep going! You can have my soul, take it, if it means you will keep writing this story. I could keep going on about how awesome this story is, but I feel that I would only end up repeating things that have been said and making myself look like a completely obsessed fan, which I am btw. You earned an instant watch and 5 stares.

Excellent. I require more of this. Can't wait to see more Rainbow Dash comforting Fluttershy.:rainbowkiss:

umm... this fic kinda had me like wtf at the beginning because I just read fading colors where AJ asked Dashie... lol... except in the other fic it worked out... :fluttercry:

I want more of this... also this makes me kinda hate applejack... Also fluttershy is hurt... :fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry:

I am going t buck the buck out of:ajsmug: if she ever does anything mean to Fluttershy (Best Pony)

This gets my EPIC Stamp

/---------------------------\
EPIC
\---------------------------/

There you go...:scootangel:

*In the words of an angry Avatar<*
"Nopony hurts Fluttershy and gets away with it"
Bam! Rd foot to your face AJ!

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