Just realized nobody really knows what my OC really looks like. So here he is, very thrilled about his debut appearance here on FimFic.
It's a hippogriff, trust me. Pony Town sprites are just very limiting. And the name 'A Toaster Oven' is what I usually go by online. His name is 100% Toast or Toaster. Either one will do.
If you're like me when you want to eat some toast, you prefer it when you add the butter while the toast is still hot, straight out of the toaster, so you can hear the butter melt and ooze into the very fabric of the toasty canvas. You may also like to add some strawberry jam, or whatever else strikes your fancy. But then you realise that it's a fantasy only, for somebody never cleans the knife between jams and butter.
This actually turned out a lot better than I thought, seeing as how this was my first time putting together egg wash, and second time making pancakes (I'm mostly an egg guy).
Toast.
Toawst.
Thouwst.
ToAsT.
ToAwSt.
'Nd jam.
'Nd JAYM.
TOAWST 'ND JAYM!
TOAST AND JAYUM!
TOE-ST UND JAYHUM!
White toawst 'n' jam.
Brown ToAwSt 'n' JaYm.
50/50 ToAwSt 'n' JAYM.
White, Brown, 50/50 Toawst 'n' Jaym.
ALL THE TOAWST!
Heya, ponies. Knocked out another reading, this time with improved audio settings!
I'm gonna try to keep posting these, at least one or two a week, though probably more right now because I feel genuinely motivated to do so.
Here's the video: Boop
This story's more or less a literal dump for scrapped ideas from Pony-Me. I do plan on eventually making a fic that'd basically be like this one, but for all of my stories instead. Given how these are already rejected ideas or random scenes I messed around with, I'm not sure if there's even anything to roast.
Oh, neat. We've got a canceled story focusing on a pair of OCs that were reused from the canceled sequel to another story.
Also, long delay between posts is long. I'm feeling moderately annoyed by stuff going on at the moment so let's keep this short.
"Jewel?" I yawned, wiping my face with a towel hanging by the garage door as I entered the house. "You feel like eating out somewhere, or should I heat up yesterday's leftovers?"
And then they get food poisoning.
Look, it's a story that I killed off before it could get off the ground! And guess what happened to its reboot? Yeah, that was shot down in the same way!
Given how short this thing was, let's just go ahead and tear the story a new one. 
Twilight bashed through the doors of Town hall. "I DID IT!" she hollered, "I'VE FINALLY DID IT!"
I forgot to mention this, but there's exactly one redeeming trait in the story that still exists to this day in my current fics:
Using the chapter names to tell another, separate story.
I really, really like doing this, if you couldn't tell by the fact that I do it in just about every recent story I've written that doesn't have the comedy tag now. 
This story's by far the most experimental of my stories. I'm not even sure what I'd roast here.
You were my sister, dear Luna. Why didn’t you tell me before?
Um... I guess this could be taken completely out of context?
A thousand years since I have last felt true joy.
F for Celestia.
throughout my many protégés,
I know that this isn't my regular kind of blog post but I feel like I need to know this...
IS IT TRUE THAT PRAWN COCKTAIL FLAVOURED CRISPS ARN'T REALLY A THING IN ANY OTHER PART OF THE WORLD?!?!?! I saw it in a YouTube video and I had to know... PLEASE tell me this is not true... 
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
...
...
*Looks again at the story*
Hey, ya heckers, it's me again, ya boi with the toasty self-roasty reviews. We gon burn up Equestria Forever in a bit.
Neat, another follower special.
No comment on the story itself. Let's get right into it.
Twilight shrieked as she set hoof into her castle. Except... it wasn't exactly a castle anymore, but rather a large, BLT-shaped railgun mounted on an absurdly large golden statue of Twilight's head.
Aaaaaand that happened.
Hey, it's another fic that has a major influence on my stories today!
Funnily enough, apparently I considered this story a sequel to I Think I Summoned a Ponk. I guess I wasn't quite ready to let that fic die just yet after Equestria Forever ended up as a mess in a hole.
Hey look, it's what was supposed to be what is now What If!
Seriously though, What If was supposed to be the serious story, while this one was supposed to go wacko-insane. Funny how life throws curveballs at you, eh? Either way, I've got a new comment-driven story sitting somewhere along the approval queue. We'll see how well that one goes. 
Don't mind the fact that I got distracted and played Angry Birds for half an hour before starting on this.
Yup. We're knocking out an entire series this time 'round.
Mmm... I love the smell of reboots in the morning.
I should probably put some work into this fic now that Splintershard's on hiatus, shouldn't I? I mean, I'm already here, roasting it, so I'd might as well take the step and actually write another chapter, right?
Nah. I'ma roast this thing and then probably go to bed or something. Or lurk on Discord for another hour.
Anyway.
Back at it again with the smurfhorses, Tonkus!
Anyway, you know the drill. Long story, skip out on some chapters (unless it's something I especially like).
Slowly, with a groan, I opened an eye. It was just as I feared... the portal led us to the wrong location, and from the looks of it, that wrong location is a freakin' space station.
Whoops.
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