• Member Since 10th Aug, 2012

Derpamena


Muffins, if you know what I mean...

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Total Words: 6,839,564
Estimated Reading: 2 weeks

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Octavia tells her friends she's dating Discord.

They take it well.


Proofread by Soundslikeponies, Pearple Prose, Themaskedferret and Octavia Harmony.

Chapters (1)
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"I've got crabs."

Those three little words, spoken to Rainbow Dash over the phone, set Canterlot High School on fire.

Because even though most of the student body has forgiven Sunset Shimmer for her past transgressions and she has more friends than ever now, some gossip is just too juicy to ignore.

Besides, everybody's more than a little curious as to the finer details--and who else might be dealing with the same problem.

(Rated Teen for discussion of sensitive topics.)

Chapters (1)
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No one alive today can say where she came from; simply that she has always been there.

And yet, few ponies have had a greater impact on Princess Celestia's life than Raven, her most faithful aide.


Inspired by and based off of a headcanon put forth by Heir-of-Rick, though perhaps a bit less insidious than what he had in mind. He very kindly provided an alternate version of his image for me to use as my cover image! Text added by me.

All comments and criticism very welcome!

Featured in the Royal Canterlot Library! Go there to read the interview for some behind-the-scenes info on this story!

Translations: Chinese, Spanish!

Chapters (10)
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Vanilla oat swirl ice cream is a girl's best friend when she's alone on Hearts and Hooves Day, and at half-off, it would be a shame not to buy any. But when Rarity runs into Applejack at the store, Applejack offers to keep her company.

Rarity is thrilled that she has someone to commiserate with about being single.

Applejack is happy to have a date for Hearts and Hooves Day.

This may be a problem even vanilla oat swirl can't solve.

Chapters (1)
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After moving to Ponyville, you met a celebrity known for her speed and for being a members of the council of friendship. You and her get along fine, she's your boss at work since you do weather stuff, and as of a week ago you and her have become close friends. She's invited you to her house. Why? The better question is why care, you're going to be in THE Rainbow Dash's house. Man, what could possibly go wrong?

Well, only one thing. You may not have noticed, but she's making moves on you. You, not being the brightest of bulbs, don't really get it, but Rainbow is stubborn, and she isn't going to give up after one try. So after inviting you to her house, something's bound to go wrong.

Chapters (1)
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Trying to patrol the dreams of every pony in Equestria can be stressful. To ease her burden, Luna retools the Tantabus to turn nightmares into good dreams instead of vice versa. Aware of her mistakes from last time, she tests it out thoroughly, making sure there are no unexpected behaviors. And as far as she can tell, there are none.

Except that it's started calling her "Mom".

Faced with the prospect of possibly creating life, Luna seeks out Twilight's advice and assistance. With a little luck, they can get this all sorted out before the sun rises.

Chapters (5)
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Spike's got three whole days to himself while Twilight is away at the Crystal Empire. Three whole days to be independent and free to do whatever he wants.

Or he would have, if a female dragon hadn't mistaken him for an abandoned hatchling. Now he's been snatched up and taken to her home to be "properly cared for."

Stuck in a cave with an overly-protective dragon intent on mothering him...maybe he should have just gone with Twilight.

Thanks to QueenCold for letting me use this picture of theirs as cover art!

Chapters (12)
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On her latest visit to the human world, Twilight decides that she likes having a smartphone too much. So she steals one and takes it back to Ponyville with her.

Sunset does not approve.


This story was Featured on February 3, 2016.

Chapters (1)
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One day, while working at Sugar Cube Corner, Pinkie Pie comes to a startling realization.

She has no idea how Fluttershy earns money.

For Pinkie Pie, not knowing something so important about one of her closest friends is intolerable. But when she asks Fluttershy, the only answer she'll give is:

"I do odd jobs."

Now, Pinkie Pie is determined to find out exactly what Fluttershy does to make ends meet...

(Rated Teen for mild risque humor.)

Chapters (1)
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Long ago, Commander Hurricane set an example that still resonates with all pegasi who fall in love with their ground bound kin. Every pegasus knows the story, the tradition is deeply engrained and held dear to their hearts.

Now, if only Twilight could curb her curiosity long enough to enjoy and appreciate just how important she is to Rainbow.

Pre-reading and editing assistance by Melon Hunter and Timaeus.

Art originally by ELZZombie

Chapters (1)