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T
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“Sometimes, you can’t have the family you want. Even if you’d give anything for it.”

For Sunburst, risen from obscurity to Court Wizard of the Crystal Empire, life has taken an incomparably good turn. Shining Armor and Cadence have almost become a second family to him, and Princess Flurry Heart like the daughter he never had.

Hoops, by contrast, has lived life on his terms since day one. With flight school behind him, his career in the professional leagues ought to be all but guaranteed—if only the pros would let him in already.

And when Sugarcube Corner burns down, it should not affect either of them.

Yet, when façades start to fracture, their connections to Ponyville's model family will threaten even the most sacred bonds. Before long, Sunburst, Hoops, and the Cakes will all have to decide if the past can be buried again, or if the old, comfortable stories just aren't enough anymore. In only one way, they are all alike: To get what they want, they are all willing to risk shattering every life around them—and maybe even their own.


Audio version by the immensely talented Neighrator Pony here!

Original story concept co-developed with Astro Brony and Obabscribbler. This story would not exist without them.

Special thanks to my beta readers: Luna Farrowe, Neighrator Pony, Chaotic/Sojourner, and AShadowOfCygnus, whose encouragement and guidance made publishing this a reality.

Cover art by UrbanQhoul.

Chapters (18)
T

Pinkie loves Rainbow. Pinkie tries to kill Rainbow. Pinkie finds she's not the only one who's crazy.

Psychopaths don't like to share the fact they're psychopaths—besides with the victims locked up in their basement. Pinkie is one of those psychopaths, only she has a victim instead of victims, the one and only Rainbow Dash. Every attempt on her life has been avoided and unnoticed.

Pinkie doesn't mind this game of cat and mouse, and if she didn't know better, she might suspect the same being true for Rainbow. With every attempt, Pinkie gains clarity on her feelings for the pegasus, before finding out the truth.

Apparently, Pinkie isn't the only one who's crazy.


Inspired by this video.

Chapters (1)
E
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Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie dress up as superheroes and head out to fight crime - or boredom. Same thing, really. When Pinkie Pie reveals that her favorite superhero is even cooler than Daring Do, trying to find an opportunity for heroics won't be the only thing gnawing on Rainbow's mind.

Chapters (1)
T

Twilight’s flying lessons have taken to a slow pace, but things quickly heat up when she gets her very first wingboner... right in front of Rainbow Dash.

Could her best friend be responsible for this?


Youtube reading by Doom Pie Network

Chapters (1)
E
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Sunset is beat after a long day at school. After a day of stress, Sunset just wants to have a bit of fun after school. Luckily for her, her friend Pinkie Pie is a master of fun. And what's more fun than visiting a carnival? With rides and fried foods and fun in store for the evening, Pinkie Pie plans to help Sunset have a night she'll never forget.

Of course, if Pinkie's being super-duper honest with herself, the carnival might provide the opportunity she needs to get something off her chest. A secret that makes her feel like she'll explode if she doesn't say it soon. But how do you tell your friend something this big when you know it might change everything?

Chapters (1)
T
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When Fluttershy went to bed, she was a normal mare. When she woke up, she could see numbers floating over everypony's heads. They were timers, each one counting down to some unknown event. Most ponies had timers that wouldn't end for years, some for many decades. But everypony had different numbers.

So why does Rainbow Dash's timer end in three hours?


Editing provided by TheMaskedFerret and SolidFire.
Cover art by HopefulSparks!
Spanish translation by SPANIARD KIWI!

Chapters (1)
T
Source

Doomie, like most of his brothers, hasn't eaten in a while.
So, when a random pink pony asks for him to "do her"
and intercourse love is the tastiest kind of love out there,
and the pony herself looks pretty pretty:
How could he refuse?


Author's diary: DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAR diary. There is not enough Doomie pie fanfics out there....That is all.

Chapters (14)
T
Source

When the Royal Wedding scatters defeated changelings all over Equestria, a member of the hive winds up being captured in Ponyville, tied up, stunned, repeatedly shot by a cannon, and held against his will.

The truly frightening part is he’s starting to like it.

Thank you to my twisted editors: Tek, Seether00, GameKnut, Cerulean Blue and Peter
The picture Pinkie Pie uses Party Canon is from Atmospark at DeviantArt

This story is listed as comedy⁽*⁾ because the author has an odd sense of humor. No changelings were harmed⁽¹⁾ during the production of this story, despite what the newspapers printed or the ongoing lawsuit from the ESPCA⁽²⁾. The management would like to remind all readers to spay and neuter your pets. Unless your pet is a changeling, in which case…


(*) Dark humor, to be exact. If you are someone who finds pleasure in the misfortune of others, enjoys watching the occasional inept chainsaw juggler or cheers during a NASCAR crash, welcome home. Also, get help.

(1) Excluding blunt trauma, thermal impingement, chemical exposure, radiation, thaumaturgic infusions, and confetti ingestion. All characters represented, including changelings, are the exclusive property of Hasbro, no matter what they may shout at you from between the bars of their cell. Any violence or pain inflicted on the changeling in this story was simulated on a stunt changeling with special effects and mirrors. Except for the cannon. There is no truth to the rumor that Queen Chrysalis provided the stunt changelings from a supply of disobedient changelings in her dungeon⁽³⁾.

(2) Equestrian Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Arthropods

(3) The Changeling Kingdom does not have dungeons. They have Call Centers. It explains a lot, actually.


Here is a link to some appropriate background music to listen to while reading: Piotr Tchaikovneigh’s 1812 Overture

Additional Note: This story is tagged Sex because it has the occasional reference to… well, sex. There are no explicit references, but there are things.

Chapters (21)