• Member Since 7th Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Sep 17th, 2019

Princess Glitzy


I'm a human being who writes stories about ponies.

E

Love. Romance. These are not things that you associate with Angel Bunny. You might hear annoying, picky or bossy, but never anything like love. What if he does have a bunnyfriend? What if she`s totally adorable and awesome? This cool bunny`s name is Buttercup. This is a love story between two fluffy bunnies.


This is a side story to Diamonds and Butterflies.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 12 )

AWWWWWW... I LOVE THIS STORY *cries* SO HAPPY XD

And then they start breeding like rabbits.
Very cute story :scootangel:

2535505 We might want to wait a little bit before that, but I enjoy your enthusiasm in having more baby bunnies! BABY BUNNIES!!!

-Good Story, Very enjoyable.:pinkiehappy:

-Needs work, Sections definitely seem skimmed.
EXAMPLE:

Buttercup shot a large quantity of water at him with her paw.

:unsuresweetie:
ALTERNATIVE:

Buttercup rolled backwards, with hind legs tucked in tight. Aiming for Angel, She Launched her paws out with all her might, causing a sizable wave to clash right into Angel's face.

:rainbowlaugh:

-Not trying to insult your work, just helping you get a idea to improve it.:twilightsheepish:

Anyway, just put a little bit more work into each scene, detail the crap out of it. and it makes it more enjoyable. just take those two quote for example! Which one is more enjoyable to imagine?:twilightsmile:


(also the Characterization needs work, just imagine hearing the character say what you have down, if it sounds like something they'd say, your fine, if it sounds weird or not like the character; Then fix it.)

2607677 I know that it`s not the best, but I wasn`t aiming for the best. I just wanted my idea of a short and cute story to be written out. Also, I tried to add detail. Sure, it could be better, but I like it. Nice example for a sentence by the way. I think that Rarity and Fluttershy etc. would speak/act that way, it`s just what I imagine them being like. Angel may act a little bit different than the show, but he`s in love and love make people crazy or crazy happy.

2608902

Well thats not a problem, its good you wrote it out, but can still seek to make it better, but to me it feels like rarity had a little too much coffee. She is normally a little more chilled and relaxed, You dont have to make fixes or anything just giving constructive criticism. and I understand the Love makes people crazy. but its rarity that really stood out of character. anyway, its your story, im just giving my thoughts if you ever want to improve. and btw if you want you can take my Example and use it if you want.

2611460 Who knows? Maybe she did have too much coffee. Either way, the two mares were just fillers, something to make the story longer.

Rabbits can swim?

3045784 Yes, they can swim in water. It needs to be at the correct temperature and preferably water without chlorine. They also cannot be in for a long period of time for if they are in to long it may cause their skin to get dry and or shrivel up slightly (like when a human stays in for too long and their fingers look weird). Also, the rabbit would have to like it or it would jump out. Here`s a video of one!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX79yUD0OhQ

In this video the bunny is in rather deep, chlorine filled water which is a bad idea. The water should be rather shallow as well. A rabbit could swim in chlorine filled, deep, freezing cold water for a long period of time, but it would need to be cleaned and possibly taken to a vet afterwards. A solid fact is that bunnies can swim, they know how by instincts.

3045784 Sorry, I forgot to put it into the Youtube thing.

3045784

3046584 Well I'll be damned!

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