Walking on Clouds

by Kapuchu

Chapter 5 - Under the tree's shadow Part 3

“I went over to visit Fluttershy, seeing as her cottage is the nearest thing to Sweet Apple Acres. I was hoping that she’d be home for a chat or something of the sort.” Twilight closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the tree’s trunk.

“So... What then, Twi?” She gave the unicorn a light nudge between the ribs, causing her to yelp in surprise. Rainbow snorted. “Seriously, dozing off like that while telling a story?”

“I wasn’t dozing off,” Twilight retorted, sitting back besides Dash and once again leaning her head against the tree. “I was just trying to remember just what we did.”

“Okay, so what did you do then?” Rainbow Dash pressed, strangely impatient to have the unicorn start talking.

“Well, she was trying to coax out a hedgehog from under a bush.”

The sound of a single set of steps on a wooden surface could be heard as Twilight Sparkle crossed the small bridge that went across the little river separating Fluttershy’s cottage from the road towards Ponyville. She breathed in the smell of the place around it. It was wild but very serene and calm at the same time. It didn’t hold the same air as the Apple Orchard, this one made her want to relax rather than work. It wasn’t only the smell, however, as the area around her spelt one word, a single word that encompassed everything that this small grove was; Sanctuary.

Yes, this place that surrounded the small hill upon which a lone pegasus mare had made her home could only be called a sanctuary, and the one closest to the position of dominance in this place of peace was currently bent low to the point of eye-height with woodland critters, her gaze focused solely on a small figure hidden among the branches of a small raspberry bush.

“Come out little friend, there’s nothing to be scared of,” Fluttershy cooed, extending a hoof ever so slightly to the concealed subject of her attention. “You don’t have to be scared of the other critters, Mr. Hoggy.” She continued trying to persuade the little fellow to come out of hiding but to no avail.

She was interrupted from further attempts by the sound of hooves on tight packed dirt this time, and a voice calling out to her. “Fluttershy!” Twilight called, waving a hoof at her.

“Oh, h-hi, Twilight. I didn’t see you coming, what brings you here? N-not that I’m not happy to see you, because I am.” She asked, halfway hiding behind her mane as the sudden call-out had startled her just a little.

Twilight chuckled, going into a light canter the last of the way over to Fluttershy, stopping just short of her and the bush. “Don’t worry, Fluttershy, I just came here, hoping you’d have some time to spend with me... unless you have something else you need to do first, because I can wait-”

“Oh nono! I have time, Twilight. I have some cocoa and some cookies I baked this morning if you want to? I just need to feed the hedgehogs if that’s okay with you.” She looked at Twilight with both hope and hesitation in her eyes, hoping that she hadn’t offended Twilight in some way. She prayed that her friend wouldn’t get angry because she had to wait some.

“It’s fine, I have all day afterall, don’t have much to do today. I think it’s due time the library has a day where it’s closed. It’s open everyday, so I think one day of it being closed wouldn’t be much of a problem.” Her brows furrowed. “Not that very many ponies visit it either.” She perked back up again, not wanting to let her annoyance at the lack of visitors affect her time with the pegasus. “But don’t worry about that, I’m not here to complain about the library, just to spend some time with a friend.”

Fluttershy smiled a small demure smile before returning her attention to the raspberry bush again, trying to coax Mr. Hoggy out of hiding once again, but her attempts were fruitless as the little critter refused to get out of hiding, especially now that there was a new, strange pony present. “I’ll get their food then. Umm... would you mind getting the cookies and the cocoa ready? It’ll be a little fast that way.”

“No problem Fluttershy, you don’t have to be so hesitant about asking me to help a little, you know I’m always willing to help a friend.” She trotted into the cottage, following the yellow pegasus. Once inside she made her way to the kitchen but not before quickly being told where the different things were. Fluttershy then grabbed an already prepared number of bowls filled with salad and various vegetables on her back, a little help coming from Twilight. She then went outside to feed Mr. Hoggy and and the other hedgehogs that made the cottage and the area surrounding it their home.

It was only a few minutes later when Fluttershy returned, the hedgehogs fed and a few other things taken care of that had popped up while she was out there. One of them being a bird whose nest had become a little askew thanks to Mr. Eagle practicing a new trick to impress Rainbow Dash and then crashing into it. The bird, a robin, had asked Fluttershy’s help with making sure it sat firmly in the tree again. She had, of course, helped the robin. How could she not?

The pegasus stepped inside and was immediately met with the pleasant smell of warm cocoa wafting from the twin cups standing on the table with a small plate laden with cookies between them, Twilight sitting on one side of the table with an expectant smile on her face. A quick glance to the side revealed that there was a small fire burning in the fireplace, but there were no smoke and very little warmth coming from it.

“A little something for the ambience, I thought it would make it a bit more cozy and comfortable,” Twilight explaining, having noticed Fluttershy’s confused glance.

“Oh. Well, that’s alright. It’s actually nice, really... does it burn the wood?”

Twilight shook her head. “No, it doesn’t. It’s more of an illusion coupled with a heating spell. It gives off a little warmth and light, but it doesn’t actually burn.”

A smile appeared on Fluttershy’s face as she made her way over to the other side of the table, sitting down as gently as a butterfly landed upon the crown leaf of a flower. She tentatively reached out for one cup of cocoa while Twilight grasped the other in her telekinesis. They each sipped once, then twice, before either of them spoke.

“So, Twilight, how has your day been so far?” Fluttershy asked cautiously, taking another sip of the cocoa held between her hooves.

A light brown cookie with pieces of dark chocolate in it floated from the small pile on the table and up to Twilight’s mouth where she took a small bite before answering. “I’ve been having a little trouble the past day or two. I have a friendship report I want to sent to the princess, but I don’t really know what to write in it, so I took the day off to spend some time with my friends. You know, to clear my head.”

Fluttershy didn’t seem to quite believe the lie, although she nodded her head and refrained from commenting on it. She figured that it wasn’t her place to call out Twilight on not telling the entire truth. That is, if she actually was lying. She decided to just stay quiet on that matter and try to forget about it. She instead chose to delve into something else.

“How’s your love life going, Twilight?” She asked, though quickly retreating behind her mane in shame, fearing that she may have offended or upset one of her friends. “I-I’m sorry, Twilight, I shouldn’t have said that. You -umm- don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I mean, you can answer if you want to, but you also can’t- oooh...”

Twilight, to her credit, managed to somehow keep the embarrassed blush to a minimum, though her cheeks still flared brightly enough to be visible. She slowly set the cup back down on the table in her now wobbly telekinetic aura, her concentration halfway broken by the completely unexpected question from her friend.

“I hear there are rumours about a particular set of musicians,” Fluttershy continued, “I think it was Octavia and Vinyl Scratch. It was in the newspaper the other day.”

“W-Well,” Twilight stuttered, having finally managed to get her blush under control, though there was still some slightly nervous fiddling with her hooves. “It isn’t going well, been alone for quite some time... Didn’t really go well the one time I had a love life. I had a coltfriend once, it ended horribly.”

“Oh my... What happened?” Fluttershy almost whispered. “That is... If you don’t mind me asking, because it’s okay if you don’t want to since it... didn’t go so well.”

“It’s okay. I haven’t really spoken with anyone about it before. I suppose I should at least let one other pony know.” She sighed and let a smile spread across her lips as she recalled the time she had with her first coltfriend.

“It started as nothing more than a fillyhoof crush. His name was Dazzle, a young unicorn colt with a vanilla coat and light purple mane. His Cutie Mark was a golden star in the middle of a square made up of four squares; two black and two white, exactly like a disco floor. Man, he could dance. I met him at a small party I was at with Celestia, it was just a formal gathering of some sort, a little soiree arranged by Fleur De Lis, I think.

“It was still on the days where I did nothing but study, I even had a book on Advanced Abjuration with me that my nose buried in. It was at that point that he came over to me and asked for a dance. I had never really danced before outside of my parents teaching me every now and then, so I was, of course, nervous and immediately tried to find a way out.” She chuckled a little as she remembered her own almost panicked state of mind when Dazzle had asked her.

“It took a bit of coaxing from Celestia to make me finally accept his offer, and he just stood there the entire time, waiting for me.” Her cheeks took on a slightly darker colour as blood rushed to her face. “I had more fun that night than I ever had before. I didn’t know why or what compelled me to do it, but as the party approached its end, I had come to like him. It wasn’t really anything but a little bit of infatuation at that point, but it was enough that I remember pecking him on the cheek.” A noticeable 'squee' sound could be heard from across the table, one that caused a small grin to appear on the unicorn.

“We kept seeing each other for quite some time after that, in secret of course. We just chatted with each other for the majority of the time, watched the night sky or walked through the gardens. My... infatuation with him grew into a real crush after a little time, I genuinely started to like him and be with him. I think he felt the same. The occasional peck I had given him before soon became actual kisses.” The blush adorning her cheeks visibly darkened. “He wasn’t just a great dancer, that I can assure you.

“Anyway, we actually ended up having a real relationship with a date here and there, the moonlit walks in the gardens, as hopelessly romantic as that sounds, and so on. It was a serious yet innocent relationship until...” A melancholic sigh escaped the unicorn’s lips. “Until his family had to move. I never found out exactly what it was about, but I think it was some sort of business arrangement that forced them to move out of Canterlot and to Trottingham.”

Fluttershy, easily being able to see that Twilight had been affected by bringing up the memories of her lost love from way back when, moved over and embraced her friend.

“It’s not a big deal, Fluttershy,” Twilight protested, “it was years ago, I’ll be okay.”

“You may say you’re okay, Twilight, but I can see that you’re not. It hurt you that he had to move, broke your heart.”

Twilight would have protested further had it been anypony other than her dear friend. She eventually just shrugged and wrapped her hooves around the pegasus in return, fully accepting the hug and letting the one tear that had gathered in the corner of her eye slip.

The two of them sat for some time like that, Fluttershy holding Twilight while said unicorn went down memory lane, reminiscing about all the small dates and meetings she had with her one-time coltfriend. The wound she had received the day she got the news that he was forced to move had long since healed, but there was still a scar where it used to be. A small needle had come and poked the scar, prompting a small part of it to open up and let some of the hurt out again. Despite this, it never amounted to more than the one tear she had already shed.

She had liked Dazzle, liked him enough that she had wanted to stay with him and almost wished that she was still together with him. What would have happened had he not been forced to move? Would they have broken apart at a later date, or would they still be with each other? The fact that Twilight had moved to Ponyville may have been what tore them apart this time.

It eventually came to the point where Fluttershy let go of her embrace and took a step back, watching her friend as she, too, returned to the world of the living. Twilight took a quick sip of what was left of her cocoa, finding it cold. They had been sitting there, embracing each other for quite some time by now, longer than she cared to admit.

“Are you okay, Twilight?”

“I’m okay, Fluttershy, thank you for looking out for me.” She glanced out the window above the kitchen sink. It was getting a little late, and she’d prefer to have time enough at hoof to give both Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash a visit before the day ended. “It’s getting a little late, I should be going. I plan to give both Pinkie and Rainbow a visit before dinner.”

Fluttershy quickly brought her hooves up, covering her mouth in shock and what looked to be guilt. “Oh! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to keep you away from the other girls.”

“Don’t worry,” Twilight chuckled, “I’m sure they won’t mind if I spend a little more time with you one day than I do with them.”

“O-Okay, if you say so.” She let her hooves back down on the floor, though there was still some hesitation in her demeanor. That’s Fluttershy for you.

Twilight stood up and made for the front door, thanking the pegasus for the cocoa and the cookies before she grasped the doorknob in her telekinesis and opened the door. Fluttershy followed behind and, when the door was swung open, brought Twilight in for a quick hug, saying that if she needed anything or needed somepony to talk to, then the cottage was always open for her. As it was for all of her friends, Fluttershy was quick to reassure.

During the embrace, Twilight couldn’t help but realise that hugging Fluttershy felt strangely similar to how it felt to hugging Dazzle way back when. She especially noticed the softness of her friend’s fur but chalked it up to good coat-care. She hadn’t really noticed this before seeing as she had almost all but forgotten her one-time coltfriend, but now that the memories had been brought to the surface, so did the memory of how embracing him felt which allowed her to compare it to the current sensory input her brain received.

Shouldn’t it feel more platonic to be embraced by a mare when I am one myself? Not important, I guess.

Pulling out of the embrace, Twilight told her goodbye one last time and went out of the door, immediately setting course for Ponyville. She didn’t make it more than three steps, however, before she was heard Fluttershy call out to her, or her equivalent of it anyway.

“Umm... Me and some of the girls were talking about a get-together in town one of these days. You want to come, right?”

Twilight hummed and tapped her cheek in a thinking motion. “I’ll think about it. When did you think we should do it?”

Fluttershy’s brow creased in thought as she struggled to remember what days they had talked about going. “I think it was in four or five days,” she answered after a few moments. “I can’t remember the exact date, but I’m sure Rarity remembers. I’ll ask her later today or tomorrow to be sure.”

“Thanks, I guess I’ll see you then,” Twilight replied with a nod and a smile, then turned back towards the small bridge that lead to the road to ponyville. That means I still have the next three days to decide exactly who I should spend time with to get that friendship report in order. It will all be done! She then gleefully skipped down the dirt road, aiming for Sugarcube Corner in Ponyville. She was hoping to find Pinkie Pie there.

“Woohoo! Funtimes inbound! Pinkie Pie is coming!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, punching a hoof into the air.

“You’d be surprised,” Twilight muttered under her breath, too quiet for the pegasus to hear.

A light breeze blew through Twilight’s mane as she trotted peacefully towards Ponyville, her destination in mind being Sugarcube Corner. She had so far visited three of her friends and had only spent about five or six hours in total, now she only needed Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash, then she could go home and find out who she should spend time with in order to have the best chance of learning something new to write in her friendship report to Princess Celestia.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she did not notice the pink ball of energy bouncing along the dirt with a gleeful smile on her face. Pinkie Pie stopped in front of Twilight. “HI!” She almost yelled.

Twilight jumped, absolutely certain that her fur had been scared right off of her body. She landed on her rump and looked up at Pinkie, her breathing ragged and uneven. She lifted her right hoof to her chest, inhaled and, as she moved the hoof in in front of her, exhaled again. This action was repeated thrice before she stood up, having finally regained that ability to speak.

“Pinkie! You scared the living daylights out of me!” Twilight exclaimed, exasperated.

“Pfft, Twi, no I didn’t, I couldn’t have.” She poked Twilight in the chest. “You don’t have daylight inside of you, I mean, how could it get inside of you? That’s just silly.” She giggled and stood up beside Twilight, flashing the unicorn a winning smile.

Don’t even attempt to use logic against her, Twilight berated herself as she opened her mouth to retort that it was just a figure of speech rather than a literal statement. She had tried using logic against Pinkie Pie before, and all it had done was give her the nickname ‘Rapidash’. It took three months to get Pinkie to stop using that name, and she still has no idea what the name meant.

“Anyway,” she said. “How are you doing, Pinkie?”

“I’m doing just superrific! I’ve been baking cake for Carrot Top, ran around town for supplies for Mrs. Cake and had all sorts of fun by myself the rest of the time!” The pink pony was jumping circles around Twilight as the two trotted, and jumped, ever closer to Ponyville. “So how about you, Twi, have you been having fun today? Done all sorts of mad unicorn scientist experiments, huh?”

“I’m afraid not,” Twilight replied, holding back a snicker. Despite how annoying Pinkie could be from time to time with her incessant rambling, she could also be quite fun to be around. One thing was certain, she’d get you smiling at some point during your time together. “I’ve been visiting Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy, just chatting a bit, and actually wanted to go see you now.”

Pinkie gasped, her smile widening just a bit more. “Then what are we waiting for? Let’s talk!”

True to her word, Pinkie started talking and she hardly stopped to breathe, a fact that really surprised Twilight. She talked for minutes on end, only stopping to allow Twilight to answer a question. Her random speeches ranged from new recipes she had in mind to theories as to how she could use alcohol in her cupcakes and muffins for ponies of legal age. She even waved off Twilight’s attempt to say that she couldn’t do that since ethanol evaporates at a lower temperature than water does.

At one point, however, when they were just two minutes from Ponyville’s border, Twilight felt like she had to stop the waterfall of randomness that was Pinkie talking.

“And that is how I befriended the king of the ants in Antville and saved thei-” A hoof interrupted further speech of the heroics deed of Pinkie Pie and the ants.

“Pinkie, sorry, but I have to go now. I also need to find Rainbow Dash, you know.” Twilight flashed Pinkie an apologetic smile, trying to convey that she regretted having to leave her.

“Aaaw, but I wanted to tell you the whole story about Mrs. Antmy and her autumn leaf pie.”

“Tell me some other day, is that okay?” Another smile was flashed Pinkie’s way, this one hopeful rather than apologetic.

A pink hoof was tapped against an equally pink chin as Pinkie contemplated the proposition. As she eventually found nothing wrong with it she nodded her head vigorously. “Okie Dokie Lokie! I’ll see you some other time, bye Twilight!”

Twilight waved goodbye as well, smiling genuinely this time rather than trying to make Pinkie understand that she was sorry for going or hoping for some response. Purple light enveloped her horn and with a flash of light she was gone, reappearing somewhere else on the other side of town.

“Note to self; Pinkie will not work for the test. She’s much easier to spend time with when there’s more than just her and me.” She drew in a deep breath through her nose and let it out slowly through her mouth. It had been a challenging twenty minutes to be with Pinkie, but she had survived with her sanity intact.

“And that is the conclusion of my daring adventures for today,” Twilight said, letting out a low chuckle. “Pinkie was a challenge, I’ll admit, but it was fun in its own right.”

“So, what now?” Rainbow asked, turning her head to look at Twilight.

“Now? Now I plan to just spend a little time with my favourite blue pegasus.” A few moments later Twilight’s hoof impacted with her forehead, a loud smack and a possible mark being the result. “That sounded better in my head,” she grumbled.

Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash didn’t quite know if she should be blushing or laughing at her friend’s remark. It ended up becoming a mix of both. She chuckled loudly while her cheeks were ever so slightly darker in colour than usual. “That was priceless, Twi!”

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up,” The unicorn mumbled, her head buried in her own hooves.

Unbeknownst to the two of them, several clouds were gathering overhead. Not only that, but they were slowly getting darker and darker. It was not yet enough for the sun to be blotted out, but it wouldn’t be long. A light breeze picked up where there had previously been almost nothing, rustling a few loose leaves in the tree crowns.

“I was thinking,” Rainbow said after a few minutes of mindless chatter about this and that. A few mentions about a new trick of Rainbow’s and a minute or two of questions asked about business in the library and the everyday life of Twilight Sparkle. “Do you have that Daring Do book with you?” She fidgeted nervously with her hooves as well as darting her eyes around.

“I do,” Twilight replied with a hint of mischievousness glinting in her eyes. Her horn lit up briefly and the book appearing with a flash of light, landing in Twilight’s hooves when gravity took effect. “Why? Do you want to read it?”

The look on Rainbow’s face as the book literally dropped out of the sky was worth every bit Twilight owned. Her eyes widened, pupils filling almost the entirety of her eyes. Her lower lip was pushed forward, quivering, and her ears were splayed back. She swore she could even see small sparkles in Rainbow’s eyes.

Note to self; ask Celestia to officially rename the ‘Puppy dog eyes’ to ‘Rainbow Dash eyes,’ Twilight noted, grinning widely on the outside.

“Yes please, I want to read it!” Rainbow exclaimed, jerking her entire body as if she only just stopped herself from diving towards it.

“Alright then.” The book was enveloped in a light purple glow, trademark of Twilight’s magic, and the book opens, the first page turned over. “Daring Do trotted along the cobbled roads of Canterlot-” Twilight is interrupted from her readings by Rainbow Dash pressing fully up against her, her eyes shining with joy as they are transfixed on the page as she silently read the words her brain could easily have confused with alcohol. She didn’t even acknowledge, or didn’t notice, that her entire body was pressed up against Twilight in order to get a better look at the page.

“Ahrem,” Twilight cleared her throat, her face flushed by the contact between them. She glanced to Rainbow and, when she saw only the pegasus staring at the page, returned her own attention to the book. “Daring Do trotted along the cobbled roads of Canterlot, heading for her assistant’s home. Posey had mailed her a few days prior, briefly mentioning something about a new expedition he thought would be of interest for Daring. The letter said hardly anything, and it was only made harder thanks to Pokey’s new decryption method. Paranoid little bugger, Daring thought...”

A few minutes passed as the two continued to read side by side. Both pressed against the other to get the best look at the book, neither making anything more of it than that, though the thought of it not being anything did nothing to remove the slight blush on Twilight’s cheeks.

A drop of water fell from the now darkened sky. Neither of the two ponies beneath the tree had noticed the clouds had multiplied in number or that they had darkened to grey rain clouds.

Twilight looked up and frowned, the pegasus copying her actions. They had both been enjoying this little outdoor reading session with each other.

“It’s raining,” Twilight muttered, still staring up at the sky.

“Really? That’s the best you can come up with?” Rainbow jabbed, smirking.

Rather than taking the bait, Twilight brought a bookmark into existence with a flash of her horn and placed it between the pages of the book, closing it before it was returned to her temporal pocket. “I think I should be going home. What about you? Wanna come back to the Library and read a little more?”

Rainbow Dash grinned widely at the prospect of getting to read more Daring Do despite the waterl. She looked like a filly in Bon Bon’s confectionary, so wide was her grin.

“Race ya!” She announced and ran towards Ponyville.

Twilight shook her head, smiling, and took off as well, galloping as fast as she could to try and catch up. A flash of magic and she re-appeared on Rainbow’s side, matching her pace as best as possible. They ran through the now-drumming rain, manes and tails matted and clinging to their faces and necks.

Their eyes met and they both grinned at each other, speeding up even further. Rainbow increased the speed with which she ran, prompting Twilight to step past her boundaries and exceed her limits. Wind roared past them, hoof-falls thundered across the ground as they ran.

They entered Ponyville and the sound of their hooves changed from the pounding in dirt to the loud clicking of hooves on cobble stone. Houses passed by them in a blur as they rushed to the library and Twilight’s home. They were neck and neck, Rainbow having matched Twilight’s speed. Golden Oak’s Library came into view, quickly coming closer as they ran faster and faster. Nothing else mattered for the two of them, only the wind rushing past their ears, their hearts beating hard in their chests and the feeling of the other being with them.

Rainbow increased her speed just a little, getting centimetres ahead of Twilight as said unicorn reached out with her magic and opened the door from a distance. Closer and closer they came, the entrance to the tree being their goal. Rainbow was half a body’s length forward. She entered into the library, but stubbed her hoof on the threshold. Twilight crashed into her from behind, sending them both tumbling through the door.

Author's Note:

Patience is a virtue... One I do not posses

This is chapter five done, and a new record in chapter length.
I'd like to point out that this chapter hasn't gone through my two lovely editors yet, so there will probably be a mistake here and there, or a lot more than usual. Here's to hoping my own look through it was enough to rid it of the worst.

Corrections and so on will be added when it has been fully edited... I was just too impatient and really wanted this out before school starts wednesday. Changes has been made! Enjoy!

Comments

[LeopardCay]

You my freind are way to good at this.

Puppy-eye master Rainbow Dash xD

10/10

[Dark-Gold-J]

3036199 No it is need to be

1 to 999999999999999999999999999999 999999999999999999999999999999

[EddWar]

Great chapter

[TheTownCrier]

That squee!

[LeopardCay]

3036736 I dont think i can make so many Photo Finishes....

[Dark-Gold-J]

3041644 Can i try ?

[LeopardCay]

3041864 Shoot.

[Dark-Gold-J]

3041961 Man it's 20 only

[LeopardCay]

3042007 I told you so.
Belive me...
Ive tried....

[Dark-Gold-J]

3044440
Well i got to 20 and you to 10

[LeopardCay]

3045413 I can get 20 too.
I just choose 10 cuz its... easier.

[Dark-Gold-J]

3047142 Derpy Know that

[Stormgnome]

Unedited or not this had me laughing.(well there's more but this one was the best).

It had been a challenging twenty minutes to be with Pinkie, but she had survived with her insanity intact.

Now who's to say Twilight isn't a mad scientist.

[Knight of the Raven]

It's well written, the narration has a few gems. It was also cute (and admittedly, slightly disturbing) to see Rainbow's adoration of Daring Do. Her eyes seem less 'puppy' and more 'oh god I need this' though.

I can't help but think Twilight learned that heating, non-burning spell because she set at least one house on fire with it. I also can't help but think Dazzle will make an appearance in the future. Knowing Twilight's concept of dancing, I'm also wondering if he can actually dance.

I liked these lines;

'It wasn’t only the smell, however, as the area around her spelt one word, a single word that encompassed everything that this small grove was; Sanctuary,' where I believe the capitalization of the last word isn't necessary,

'Fluttershy cooed, extending a hoof ever so slightly to the concealed subject of her attention,'

'One of them being a bird whose nest had become a little askew thanks to Mr. Eagle practicing a new trick to impress Rainbow Dash and then crashing into it,'

'sitting down as gently as a butterfly landed upon the crown leaf of a flower,'

'though there was still some slightly nervous fiddling with her hooves,'

'He wasn’t just a great dancer, that I can assure you,'

'Shouldn’t it feel more platonic to be embraced by a mare when I am one myself? Not important, I guess,'

'Twilight jumped, absolutely certain that her fur had been scared right off of her body,'

'It took three months to get Pinkie to stop using that name, and she still has no idea what the name meant,'

'She even waved off Twilight’s attempt to say that she couldn’t do that since ethanol evaporates at a lower temperature than water does,'

'A hoof interrupted further speech of the heroics deed of Pinkie Pie and the ants,'

'“And that is the conclusion of my daring adventures for today,”'

'Note to self; ask Celestia to officially rename the ‘Puppy dog eyes’ to ‘Rainbow Dash eyes,’'

'the words her brain could easily have confused with alcohol,'

'They ran through the now-drumming rain, manes and tails matted and clinging to their faces and necks'

and

'Wind roared past them, hoof-falls thundered across the ground as they ran.'

I found some mistakes;

'looks' should be 'looked' in 'She looks at Twilight with both hope and hesitation in her eyes,'

'winged' isn't necessary in 'from her winged friend,'

'Squee' shouldn't be capitalized in 'A noticeable Squee sound could be heard from across the table, one that caused a small grin to appear on the unicorn,' or you could write 'A noticeable "squee" could be heard from across the table, one that caused a small grin to appear on the unicorn,'

'yellow friend' feels off, unpersonal in 'Twilight would have protested further had it been anypony other than her yellow friend.' 'Fluttershy' would fit better,

'“You may say you’re okay, Twilight, but I can see that you’re not. It hurt you that he had to move, broke your heart.” Twilight would have protested further had it been anypony other than her yellow friend. She eventually just shrugged and wrapped her hooves around the pegasus in return, fully accepting the hug and letting the one tear slip that had gathered in the corner of her eye'

should be

'“You may say you’re okay, Twilight, but I can see that you’re not. It hurt you that he had to move, broke your heart.”

Twilight would have protested further had it been anypony other than her yellow friend. She eventually just shrugged and wrapped her hooves around the pegasus in return, fully accepting the hug and letting the one tear slip that had gathered in the corner of her eye,'

I think 'slip' should be at the end of 'letting the one tear slip that had gathered in the corner of her eye,' not after 'one tear,'

You forgot to capitalize 'Twilight' in 'a fact that really surprised twilight,'

'insanity' should be 'sanity' in 'but she had survived with her insanity intact,' otherwise Celestia should start worrying about her most faithful student

and

I think it should be 'worth every bit Twilight owned,' not 'worthy.'

[Kapuchu]

3077326

'Note to self; ask Celestia to officially rename the ‘Puppy dog eyes’ to ‘Rainbow Dash eyes,’'

I am actually mildly proud of that one :3 While it wasn't necessarily one that requires a lot of brain power to write or think of, I think it's funny xP

And once again, thank you for pointing out the mistakes that I inevitably make and that my editors don't catch.

And yes, Twilight possibly learned that spell the hard way. Or perhaps because she has a little bit of common sense.

As for Dazzle... HEY LOOK! A MOOSE!
ww2.valdosta.edu/~ckbeck/moose.jpg

[Unbridled Dolly]

Why did you cancel this?

[Kapuchu]

4184978
Clicky Clicky

[Unbridled Dolly]

4187639 Did anyone ever end up finishing it?

[Kapuchu]

4187706
Not that I know of. No one ever contacted me.

[Unbridled Dolly]

4187743 Oh thats too bad.