• Member Since 12th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Oct 2nd, 2018


It's true, you know. In space, no one can hear you scream like a little girl.


Rainbow Dash. The independent, strong-willed filly brought up in Cloudsdale. Outwardly tough and hard-boiled, but her inner workings are far from perfect.

Preread (partially) by Smoking Gun.

Cover art by TwilightPoint at DeviantArt.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 20 )

So, I've been working on this on and off for a couple of weeks. No real, serious thought was put into it; I was just doing it to give my fingers something to do. Something productive.
If you don't like it, I understand. If you do like it . . . that confuses me a little more. Whatever.
Here's hoping this doesn't fail miserably!
Cheers! :pinkiehappy:

As always, filly Dash makes my heart stop. You got down a father and daughter very well. I thumbed up!

Why does it take me so long to find these adorable stories, I never read enough of them. :raritydespair:
this is Ad'awwrable :trollestia:

The amount of "D'aaaw" almost killed me.
So I had to go into the Glass Case of Emotion and regenerate my heart.

Aww, that's bloody precious. I love these types of cute stories that leave a smile on your face at the end.

Even then you could see the awesomeness starting to develop, even if she didn't know it at the time. :rainbowhuh:

Looks like eventually she got over Thunderlane...:rainbowlaugh:

1403001 excuse me sir excuse me but i must inquire why this is a one shot because well :flutterrage:moar:flutterrage:MOAR:flutterrage:MOAR:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage:

Hmmm.... I feel odd. Be right back.

*Drives off and comes back*

Guess who has diabetes!


Unfortunately, I lack the intelligence to carry this on for more than one chapter. Maybe in the future I'll think of something.

Awwww that's so cute. So is her dad a pony version of her dad in My Little Dashie?


Nah, not really. Just my headcanon for what Rainbow's dad might actually be like. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Rainbow_Dash.png




Alright, while I peel my face off the floor, here's an Inky Analysis list:

1) I Touched the Cute, and I Lived to Tell of it! Doing a story with this level of (HNNNNNG), ironically enough, takes balls. You have to be a strong mofo to touch something like this, because it really is touchy-feely. You touch it, it touches you back, and you often lose audience over this stuff in favor of "LOL TWILIGHT BONES LUNA" fics. It's also got the potential to open up a can of wriggly little 'feelings'...

2) Beast Awakened. I know in reading this that I'm not the only one who will have personal flashbacks as Rainbow Dash relates her school troubles. I think a vast majority of bronies have been there. And, yes, even the great Inky has had to face some of the shittiest, stupidest, most ignorant asshole children in unregulated elementary and middle schools--and has scars that still throb when there is a stimulant like this.

Like all great writers on here (and great writers in general), you struck a vein that most people absolutely fail to notice, even though it contains the richest blood: the truth we haven't seen. In regards to what we know of Rainbow Dash and what her peers were like in the filly years, it only makes sense that she was way more deeply affected (and probably even molded) by such things as bullying and condescending wannabes. Dash was made fun of (like everyone who is different) because she was different... and then, she showed everyone a huge reason that she was really awesome... and that gets under cold kids' skin like nothing else, driving them to hate you and tear you apart even more; if they're not right, everyone is wrong, and the more you provide evidence that their view is false, the harsher they will become.

This may have spurred from a thought of, "What was Dash's daddy like?" but has become a way more introspective look into who Rainbow Dash is, and possibly, what created her. In being bullied and tormented, two things will happen:

A) You will crack, splinter, and be broken in some serious way forever; never a full recovery, and no true benefits.

B) You will crack, splinter, and finally lash out, using all the pain and rage to become the complete opposite of every awful thing your hateful enemies said you were or would be; from weakness applied to pressure, strength and willpower will be born.

If we see how RD is now (confident, competitive, ambitious, even a little egotistic), we see the traits of someone who probably has experienced a lot of torment and punches to her self-esteem in the past. It's when someone pushes you into the dirt and you get furious enough to strike back that you lunge up faster than anyone would ever expect... and you stay that way, looking for opportunities to prove yourself after months or years of being told, "You can't, and you won't."

It becomes your motto: "I will."

Congrats, brah--you stumbled on a psychology nugget.

3) A Looking in View. And, finally, we have the original idea of the piece: "A moment from Rainbow Dash's fillyhood." That's something that takes a maturity and curiosity to approach and spend effort entertaining and developing that a lot of folks just don't have. It's easy enough for everyone to get caught up in the action and thrills, but to sit back and joyfully experience the mundane is a trait that is rare. To approach a childhood memory with an aching emotional pain in the middle is brave.

So, yah, I liked it.

*You guys have no idea how many awful, sexually explicit things I saw searching for that "HNNNNG" image. So many penises...


I daresay that you put far more psychological meaning into the story than I did.
Nevertheless, I appreciate readers who give such comprehensive feedback such as this. It makes a writer really feel good about himself when he sees that someone actually has taken the time to get something out of something he's written.
And for that, thank you. :twilightsmile:


Hey, man--take writing as seriously as you've done and even go beyond that, and you'll always earn my respect and fully supportive critique. :rainbowdetermined2:

Excellent story. A nice little one shot full of adorable moments. I especially like the way you portrayed Rainbow's dad. Her personality in the show would actually make a lot of sense if she had a father as understanding as the one you've portrayed.

D'awwww D'awww and D'awwww again! :pinkiesad2:

I bucking love this story! :pinkiehappy: Great work! :twilightsmile:

Cute. And I might ad, a rare filly dash and father fic where its not about rainbow being a lesbian. There are so many of those around thats its actually refresing to see one where she's straight. Another bonus, though i might have misread this is that its a filly dashie fic where Rainbows mother is alive! There are almost none of these! Kudos.

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