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This story is a sequel to The Rejects
While Equestria sits on the brink of war, a band of misfits must come together to foil corrupt Canterlot elite, war criminals, and old enemies. Meanwhile, Princess Twilight Sparkle must divert her attention between a fractured Equestria and a vengeful threat beyond the sea.
*Next Chapter out in January!
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DISCORD!?
No fucking way is GlimGlam about to get the lord of chaos on board...
Let's goooooo
Smooth moves, Trixie.
Now to wait on GlimGlam's reaction and Discord going to explode from glee because of the chaos.
Wonder when Shimmy and the Crew will meet back up with Ms. Unkillable Bastard, though.
On other news, Spike is confirmed 🦀🦀🦀GONE🦀🦀🦀, so that's good.
Finally! About time the truth came out. Right now though, the biggest question on my mind is what the heck is in that briefcase from the first work.
Absolutely loving this, you're clearly a talented writer and I can't wait to see how this all unfolds.
11509642
Thank you!!
Sunset will unleash the war crimes soon. I am giddy to see what she does. Although I feel her personality doesn't add up entirely, she reminds me more of Movie 1 Sunset more than "nice" Sunset, but I still love her.
Plus, Celestia above knows that having her kill Twilight would be the most beautiful irony known to man. But we all know the honor of chopping off her head is going to GlimGlam.
This is awesome
Luna is PISSED. Now, where's Sunbutt so we can have Daybreaker and Nightmare Moon set loose? At this point, God knows Twiggles has it coming.
Amazing chapter as always. You my friend are one of the best writers on this site. Thank goodness we finally returned to the briefcase plot, I was beginning to worry that had been forgotten. I was way off on its contents. I'd theorized it was some sort of legal document proving the existence of the true heir to the throne of Equestria. Looks like its some sort of weapon instead... Can't wait for the next chapter!
11569989
Thank you for the very kind words!
i hope the next chapter Comes out soon i Can't wait on why Luna is acting hostile with Starlight
Rarity is dead... Lightning's crew got themselves a fine plate of shit, Trixie's after Cadance, Luna and Starlight are together, and GOD ALMIGHTY knows what Sunset, Suri and Wallflower are doing.
Rainbow and the crime gang also fucked shit sideways.
It's all further downhill from here isn't it?
D: There’s no way smolder would approve of all this
I can't tell if she means anything she's saying or is just using him for something
that's my sleepy queen
I don't know if I love how one-sided the rivalry between them is. Like at least in the last one Twilight is constantly thinking about Starlight and has regrets somewhat. I can't remember Twilight ever actually thinking about Sunset. It's fine as a motivation for Sunset, but down the line when they meet again it won't have as much impact as it could.
no.
skill issue
the consequences of 0 rizz
she's 100% correct
I thought she would be able to keep it up for way longer than that
oh we straight up skipped over the battle :(
kill bill energy
Neighsay levels of racism
...do they need the same tools that Celestia went searching for? Or are they doing their own thing
oh he dead dead
I hate her already
time for a teamup with rainbow and blondie
why do I feel like this chapter was more violent than usual lol
this guy is a problem
Great work as always!
11751902
Thanks!! <3
nice achilles reference from the movie troy lol
are we ever going to see him again?
every time someone says something like this in this story they end up betraying someone lol
she should've gone to him from the very beginning
LOOK WHOS TALKING
hoping this is elaborated on
what is his deal
neighsay would love all this anti dragon propaganda
did not expect this teamup
I'm liking her more and more in this story, but I hope she gets more of a role than just being the damsel in distress
iconic
the changelings are really not put in a good light for most of this story. like all of them are backstabbers or cowards, all except for Ocellus. Not sure I'm a fan of writing them AND the dragons both as stereotypical villainous monoliths.
this girl cannot catch a break
the dialogue is always my favorite thing about this story
whelp. Terramar is marked for death now
what is featherglass's goal here? I have a hard time believing he's making these plans just to help them out
when did this guy turn into a badass loll
ok so we've gotten all of the young six except gallus and smolder, hoping they make an appearance too at some point
jeez
I hope he's being fr because she rly needs some friends
New favorite side character
yesssss
nvm fuck him
SHES BACK
I was beginning to think we were never going to see her again
ok I have trouble believing Twilight would put any trust in Lavender at all. My best guess is she trusts that Lavender is self-interested enough to do it with the hopes of taking the position in the north that the other guy who joined broadwing has. But like why did Twilight just stop trying to kill her after it didn't work out the first time. She's like "oh well I guess that's it then." Kind of ooc for this story's version of Twilight imo.
this too - if she's so paranoid about everyone why doesn't she actually DO something about it? Twilight needs to be taking more of an active role instead of just being surprised when everyone around her starts turning on her.
twilight is going off the deep end.
we need more of her
barely an inconvenience
luna is a certified edgelord now
I am 99% sure that this is what's in the briefcase
guessing this is the king that luna was talking about earlier?
w h a t
holy cliffhanger. this was my favorite chapter since the gala one.
Excellent work as always, though I have trouble believing that any of the people Twilight assassinated were behind Celestia's death. It just seems so out of character. Then again, so was Twilight killing them... Would it be possible for you to create a brief recap chapter to sum up the events of the timeline so far? This story's been going on so long I've lost all track of quite of few of the characters and their roles.
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Yea I've been thinking about doing a recap at some point either in an author's note or as a comment. Not sure where the best place to put that is, but that will definitely appear somehow in the next five chapters. I totally get that with the time between chapters and the length it ends up being a lot to keep track of. I had even thought about doing an entire chapter that was literally just a prequel explaining all of the events that led up to the beginning Rejects 1, but I don't think I'll ever do that until after the main story is completely finished. But yea count on a recap of some sort showing up soon. Thanks again for your support, means a lot! <3
Great work as always!
This one was good but yeah next chapter better have a ton of wallflower's group in it because them going two chapters without an appearance is insane. Good work though update soon plz
Yeah, and she's been dicking around in Manehattan for the past 200k words.
My first thought was that Luna's words meant she was intended Twilight to be the first target of her roaring rampage of revenge.
However, I suspect that Twilight might instead be the first ally she intends to recruit against the Erased, oblivious of course to the Everything that's been going on.
Very much surprised Pharynx was the first to find out. You'd think any changeling could sense the disguise on another ling, it at least her emotions.
Generally my critiques from before continue to hold true. I still cannot develop the cognitive dissonance required to believe that this miserable setting, with these bastardous characters, also created the events of the show; that these craven murderers didn't take a sledgehammer to the petrified Legion of Doom at the first opportunity and mix their fragments in with the cement foundation for Canterlot's newest orphan-juicing facility.
But I do not want to repeat myself too much. Rather, I'd like to talk about tone.
I will happily admit that we're getting deeper into the realm of my personal opinion. Still, I should hope it is not my opinion alone.
I wish to stress: I was not forcing myself to read this. My fatigue does not come from unenjoyment or lack of stamina.
Still, even though I couldn't pull myself away, this was an exhausting read.
"It's going to get worse before it gets worse" is the prevailing tone.
The misery and malice in everything is suffocating. Every good thing that happens is a bad thing in disguise. Of all the kind strangers that shelter our heroes, half intended to betray them from the start, half simply wish to exploit them until a better offer falls into their lap, and a third half get iced before we even get to know them. Nopony gets any time to lick their wounds or come to admire each other. There's an attempted rape every other chapter, and an abusive family behind every other mare. Ponies have been socked in the jaw for speaking or not speaking more times than I can count.
I have noted before that by all appearances, this Equestria you've made has always been a terrible place -- that it'll require more than just dethroning Twilight to make it live up to her teachings.
But at this point, I don't care enough about this Equestria anymore to be invested in seeing it saved. Now I kinda wanna see Twilight finally give up and burn it down herself, just to spite this super-intimidating threat from overseas.
Like. Buck it. It was good when she murdered those guys actually. Not because she was right to do so, but because statistically, if you were to put a random named character to death, you'd probably take down an unrepentant murderer with a body count in the double digits.
This ubiquitous oppressiveness may well be intentional, but I cannot recommend it. Without any spots of brightness and happiness to contrast the constant darkness, you paint the kind of picture I can get by turning my monitor off, and the story becomes unfortunately only moderately more engaging than doing so.
When you brought out the Surgeon, there was no shock. All I could think was, "Yeah, that tracks."
I'll track this for the sake of the next update, but I cannot promise that I will read it as soon as it comes out.
I am a reader from another country and am looking forward to the next story!
Woohoo! Another new chapter on my favorite ongoing story!
11874476
Sheesh, is it really that terrible!?
Finished reading, and WOW what an update! I was wondering if Mayor Mare was still kicking after all of this, thought maybe Twilight had disposed of her after the events of the first story. Seems she's still alive...what a shame.
twixie moment
lol
in her failqueen era
the whole rarity part actually got my heart racing
literally
finally! now where is smolder
he folded instantly
at last some justice
good work as always!
11874476
Hey, sorry for being late with a proper response to this!
Your criticisms are interesting and for sure got me thinking, and though I agree with you on some things, I feel as though I should defend myself on some stuff. You wrote a lot so I will too, but I’ll try to be as brief as possible. I don't usually do extensive replies like this to criticism. I am trying to come at this in good faith and do not mean to be disrespectful at all in how I respond, but obv I've devoted a lot of time to writing the story and so I feel like I should give it a shot and address some points you brought up.
Your comments, while occasionally touching on interesting questions about to what extent AU fanfiction is allowed to stray from the source material, most of the time feels sensationalist, misconstruing, and not very substantive beyond “the tone is too dark and I don’t like that,” a sentiment that is fine to have, but does not necessitate the passive-aggressive tone you take at points in your comments, nor the essay-length comments. The evidence you cite is grossly exaggerated in order to get your point across, and I’ll go over your claims now.
The claim there is a “rape every other chapter” is insane. I can count the number of *attempted* sexual assaults in the story on my hand, and the number of *actually-depicted rapes* is ZERO. I have never and probably will never write a graphic on-screen rape scene. The two attempted assaults take place in 1x03 with Stewball and Starlight, and 2x02 with Juno and Hask. If you’re wondering why those scenes were included, here’s my explanation. The Stewball scene is meant to communicate the degree of danger that Starlight and the other prisoners are in at Hellhatch. But mainly, that scene has more to do with Sunset, whose murder of Stewball is meant to challenge Starlight’s conviction in never using violence as a means to protect herself and/or others. This conflict between the two endures from their first meeting to the current path in the story. As for Juno and Hask - Juno’s character has to do with thrusting someone young and naive in an unforgiving world without anybody to hold your hand. The first ponies she meets after leaving home ending up being Hask is supposed to shake her entire worldview, even more so after the death of her parents. She is a child witnessing the world at its worst. And she is going to have to either embrace the kind of evil she’s been exposed to, in Sunset, Hask, and the Surgeon, or set herself on a better path. That assault scene is meant to be heavy, and is thematically significant for her character. You can say that the Hask scene was not necessary to achieve this and that would be fine, you might even be right. But no, I really do not agree that there is a “rape every other chapter,” or that rape is something I treat lightly in the story.
The claim “abusive family behind every mare” is also very strange. Lightning Dust is the *only* example of this! Again, you can say “I don’t like that you included child abuse in this story,” and that’s fine. But this claim is blowing that issue up to crazy proportions.
Another thing - I really do not think the story supports the idea that every leading character is a psychotic bastard or an "unrepentant murderer." Here are all the POV characters whose statements and actions do not support your claim: Starlight, Wallflower, Trixie, Cadance, Rainbow, Broadwing, Moon Dancer, Rarity, Bandolier, Juno, Orion, Trixie, Bon Bon, Shining Armor, Snowfall, Silver Stream, Lightning Dust.
And here are all the POV characters who do support your claim: kinda Twilight, for sure Sunset, in a way Vertigo, and maybe Alias if I’m being really charitable. All of whom are villainous to some degree and NOT meant to be role models! Twilight and Sunset act differently from how they are in the show because they are not the exact same characters as they are in the show. This is an AU, in which certain aspects of them are different. Certain conditions for how they came to be who they are exist in this story that did not exist in MLP.
On the claim “These three in particular (Twi, Sunset, Mayor) feel like you hollowed them out and stretched their skins onto the characters you actually needed because Equestria didn't have the good leader fallen into paranoid despotism, amoral vengeance-seeker, and corrupt territorial mayor you needed.” This is strange. Of course these versions of the characters did not exist in the show, they are versions created for this story. You are attacking the premise for being what it is instead of for how it is executed.
On the claim “I didn’t come here for these meandering sections that take half the story to involve any characters I recognize and mostly just interrupt the scenes involving these ‘Rejects’ that actually interested me in the first place.” It’s fine to feel that way, but disregarding parts of the story just because they involve OCs isn’t being fair to the story on its own merit, especially when there are tons of valid story complaints you could have made against those characters like Blondie or Kickstart, who I struggle a lot with.
On the claim “What of the Pillars or the Young 6?” Both these groups were always going to be included, but not until the time was right to throw them into the mix. Was the expectation that I spend time going over how every character from the show reacts to the events of the story? I didn’t include them early on because they were not relevant to the story yet.
On the claim “nopony gets any time to lick their wounds,” I actually agree with. The story is just so large in scope I end up not focusing on smaller moments like that in order to make sure everything fits in. This is not an easy story to execute, and I have to cut a lot out that I would otherwise include for the sake of not having 40k+ wordcounts per chapter.
I think it’s fine to not like stories with darker tones. With this being the case for you, I’m not sure why you made yourself read it. My guess is Sunset and Twilight in particular are two characters you like a lot and you really did not like how I wrote them in this story. I'm not sure that warrants your comments, but if so that's fair I guess. A constructive takeaway I got from your comments is to include more “let’s breath a little” moments, so I will try to do more of that in the future, though again, there are constraints with how large and spread out the story has gotten, and I wholeheartedly accept that this is a huge flaw of the story I wish I did more to fix. But, again, thanks for the feedback, I appreciate it.
I love this story man, but I need a summary of what's going on where. There's too many plot-lines and characters to keep track of!
Finally updated! I want to review the previous article, before a lot of characters have forgotten, looking forward to the follow-up!
12053763
Yeah I def have too many storylines going on, it’s a big reason why it takes so long to update now and it’s an issue I need to work on. I’m thinking about what the best way to try and handle summarizing everything could be, like maybe adding stuff in the author’s note of each chapter just briefly touching on where everyone is and what they’re up to, but lmk if you would prefer another way! Thanks for reading man, means a lot
12055226
Pretty much the only reason I'm still using thus site, :D
I don't know how you manage to keep this story so well organized, but you manage. Great work!
I'm really looking forward to the next story, will Starlight and Twilight fight again? What kind of secret is Celestia guarding? Will the world be all right?