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Argonaut44

I unexpect the expected

Argonaut44 Joined 1st Jan, 2020 · Offline

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Starlight Glimmer, having recently escaped the clutches of her old enemy Queen Chrysalis, has run away from her old life. Yet, she is forced to confront some old wounds when the past catches up to her.
Chapters (20)
Complete Published: Sep 9th, 2020 Download
147,076 words
Comments ( 106 )
Starlight Nova
Starlight Nova #1 · Sep 9th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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Is this a sequel? In what episode did Chrysalis capture Starlight?

Pete100
Pete100 #2 · Sep 9th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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There was a scar that creased along her right eye, and she had a limp in one of her legs. Not everything always healed.

How did that happen?

She wanted this job not for the money, rather for the one thing she missed most about her old life, aside from the friendships she once thought she had: the books.

Is this implying that they weren’t really her friends?

She had met them both by chance, and would act the most like her old self when around them.

How?

He saw all three ponies go down, burned alive in an instantaneous flash of light. Then he saw who did it, a unicorn, pink coat, purple hair with a teal streak. He backed up slightly, afraid he’d be spotted by whoever this pony was, who was wreaking havoc like no other pony he’d ever seen. He saw the unicorn step down on the throat of one pony who had managed to survive, pressing down so hard that the pony succumbed to the asphyxiation, dying slowly, and undoubtedly painfully.

I think I know who that is, and when starlight finds out she is going to kill her.

Mystic Sunrise
Mystic Sunrise #3 · Sep 9th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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10425952
It might be a sequel to the author's first story. Where Cheeselegs did catch Starlight, and did not very nice things to her.

Argonaut44
Argonaut44 #4 · Sep 9th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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10425952
There’s a predecessor to this one, where all that goes down

the book keeper
the book keeper #5 · Sep 9th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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Glad to see that you have started the sequel I'm looking forward to reading it I hope that Twilight and the others will be able to fix their friendship with Starlight. You never know might get new princess at the end finger cross. Keep up the good work I look forward to future chapters

Comment posted by TheProAlpha deleted Sep 10th, 2020
TheProAlpha
TheProAlpha #7 · Sep 10th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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I just now figured out who it is! Its Crystalis!

TheProAlpha
TheProAlpha #8 · Sep 10th, 2020 · · · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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When’s the next chapter coming!:heart::pinkiehappy:

Pete100
Pete100 #11 · Sep 16th, 2020 · · · Chapter Two: Anywhere But Here ·
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“Then try harder! She’s out there, somewhere, I know she is! Every city from coast to coast should know her face! Then if she’s spotted, we’ll find her.”

Then you look for her then.

“Starlight, you’re the best friend I could’ve ever asked for, and let me tell you, if I hadn’t met you, I’d be a lot more miserable.”

Maybe dusk could help clear starlight’s name by vouching for her.

“Last night? Why I wanted to stay over? I saw these two ponies at the bar, they were staring at me...for a while...I wanted to think it was nothing, but...I thought it was weird, so I didn’t want to be alone.”

I thought they were already suspicious of what was wrong.

“This scar, and the limp, and the bruises, and all that. I used to be...friends, sort of, with Twilight Sparkle...the alicorn Princess in Ponyville. I had done a lot of bad things, and she...she took me in. As a kind of student...to learn about friendship. But the ponies in that town, and her friends, and Twilight too, they never quite accepted me. I was always the...the dangerous threat they had been told I was. I...I wanted to be better, but nothing I did ever seemed to change anypony’s minds. And I couldn’t admit that they were just using me...until….well you see, Twilight Sparkle had a lot of enemies, and one of them, a changeling, the queen of the changelings...C-Chrysalis. One day, me and a friend were heading home from a trip, and she...she kidnapped us both. She had my friend hostage, and my father, and a bunch of other friends too, and she made me...suffer, for her amusement, and if I didn’t do what she wanted, she’d hurt or kill them...Twilight came looking for me, and eventually we all got out. But I couldn’t go back...I just didn't want that life anymore. Risking all my friends’ lives because of my...selfishness. I was unfulfilled...just a...plaything for the good and the bad to use against each other. So I left. As far I could go, which was here. Then I met you guys, and...you’ve both helped me start a new life. But, the problem is...I think those ponies I saw yesterday...the ones who broke into my house...they’re going to take me back...and I...I can’t go back…”

I feel like some things aren’t making sense here.

“She’s supposed to be at home!” said another.

Who are they?

“Starlight, what the hell have you gotten me into?” Jackpot said, desolately.

How is it her fault?

Starlight was exhilarated. She hadn’t used magic outside of her home in so long.

Wasn’t she trying to avoid that?

the book keeper
the book keeper #12 · Sep 16th, 2020 · · · Chapter Two: Anywhere But Here ·
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Thanks for the update. It was a really good chapter I wonder where Starlight and her friends are going to go? I hope we don't have to wait too long until Starlight's past starts to entwine with her current life. I hope it won't be long until Twilight meets Starlight again.

I hope you will be able to update again I look forward to the next chapter keep up the great work.

the book keeper
the book keeper #14 · Sep 16th, 2020 · · · Chapter Two: Anywhere But Here ·
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10437133
You're welcome keep up the great work I look forward to the next chapter

Shiny Kelp
Shiny Kelp #15 · Sep 20th, 2020 · · · Chapter Two: Anywhere But Here ·
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After reading through all of Fading Star and this in a single afternoon (yes I have zero self-control, do not expose yourself to near 100k words of raw suffering and tension, kids), now you mean to tell me I have to wait for the rest of the story to come out?

Nah, just kidding. The story's great even if too cruel on my fragile little heart, and you had me in the edge of my seat for most of it :rainbowlaugh:.
Will be eagerly waiting for more chapters!

Pete100
Pete100 #16 · Sep 23rd, 2020 · · · Chapter Three: Get Out While You Can ·
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They all stood up, Jonagold hugging Applejack tightly, possibly for the last time.

Does that mean aj might die?

There was a knot in Starlight’s stomach, and her mind was dizzy, anxious over having to deal with the problems she had thought she’d outran. Using her magic on another pony, which she had swore she’d never do again, brought her back into the mindset she was stuck in when she was under Chrysalis’ control. She was scared, both of what she was capable of, and whether she’d ever hurt anypony again.

Are we ever gonna get a flashback about that?

“And we won’t...Just... calm down, and come with us. We just want to talk to you, Starlight.”

We could talk right now from a distance.

She sat up, took a breath to put aside the embarrassment, and bent down, pressing her mouth against his and breathing in air.

I don’t know much about CPR, so I can’t confirm if that works or not.

“That’s not your concern, is it?” Twilight asked, narrowing her eyes.

It technically is, because your in his town.

Without warning, Twilight’s horn ignited a bright purple, and a blast of magic sprang out in the form of a beam, slicing directly through Sawtooth’s left arm. The arm fell right off from the stump, landing on the ground with a loud thump. Sawtooth howled in pain, grabbing at his burning, bleeding wound and collapsing to the ground. Applejack and Pinkie stared, shocked and horrified at Twilight’s actions.

At that moment I wouldn’t have told her sh*t.

Xp45
Xp45 #17 · Sep 23rd, 2020 · · · Chapter Three: Get Out While You Can ·
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Please more! I love this story and the direction its headed!

Shiny Kelp
Shiny Kelp #18 · Sep 23rd, 2020 · · · Chapter Three: Get Out While You Can ·
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Dayum, Chrysalis really broke Twilight.

the book keeper
the book keeper #19 · Sep 23rd, 2020 · · · Chapter Three: Get Out While You Can ·
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Thanks for another great chapter i wonder who is after Stralight and I wonder what will be found in the tomb I'm very intrigued I hope you will be able to update again soon keep up the great work.

AC97
AC97 #20 · Sep 27th, 2020 · · · Chapter Three: Get Out While You Can ·
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If it meant getting to find and kill Chrysalis, Twilight would mow down every one of these low-lives with little hesitation.

Surprisingly, Twilight seemed more relaxed, content even. A small smile forced its way onto her face.

“Have it your way.”

Without warning, Twilight’s horn ignited a bright purple, and a blast of magic sprang out in the form of a beam, slicing directly through Sawtooth’s left arm. The arm fell right off from the stump, landing on the ground with a loud thump. Sawtooth howled in pain, grabbing at his burning, bleeding wound and collapsing to the ground. Applejack and Pinkie stared, shocked and horrified at Twilight’s actions.

It might sound rather paradoxical/odd considering what I've said before (regarding "Twilight would be willing to use lethal force to begin with," isn't "'weak'" [as I... perhaps questionably put it], among other stuff, with the previous story), but dang, Twilight is uh... not doing too well.

Chrysalis really, really got to her. She really needs to find some peace of sorts in the future, because this road is not one she'd ideally stay on, for everyone's sake, including her own, to be that casual about doing something like that.

There is a bit of a mystery going, with what that red unicorn and her cronies/lackeys (and if she's working for someone by extension) want in regards to Starlight, and of course, Chrysalis is being Chrysalis, a particularly driven villain, against her two hated dusk synonyms.

(I think this story might feel more... refined in a way, than the previous one was, perhaps in terms of pacing, or something else, thus far, not entirely sure how to explain it [unfortunately]. Practice/experience makes better, in any case)

Waiting on my 20s
Waiting on my 20s #21 · Sep 30th, 2020 · · · Chapter Four: When the Whole World is Quiet ·
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HOLY FUCKING SHIT

YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Pete100
Pete100 #24 · Sep 30th, 2020 · · · Chapter Four: When the Whole World is Quiet ·
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She jumped out of the way to solid ground, as the spot she had been standing collapsed in on itself, dirt and rock crashing into a large pit that led beneath the earth.

Wait, how did she get on solid ground? I thought she was in a dessert.

Twilight had forced the others to let her take a turn pulling the mighty carriage, insisting she share the burden. Everypony could sense something was off about her, though none of them were brave enough to say anything.

I would

“Fine. Fifteen minutes,” Twilight said, dully. Rainbow smiled, and immediately trotted over to a shady undercliff, for a quick nap.

Sike, My break is gonna be an hour.

Applejack accepted she’d have no luck trying to talk to her, and sighed, joining Pinkie and Fluttershy a few yards away, all of them concerned about Twilight’s well-being.

I wouldn’t care less about her well-being.

“Jackpot!” Dust snapped, annoyed at his insensitivity.

What’s she mad about? That was a good speech.

Indulging their entitled brat, I guess,” Dust said, hurting her own feelings.

How did she hurt her own feelings?

The others all struggled to a halt, Rarity collapsing to the ground in exhaustion. Rainbow, who was right behind Twilight, and didn’t think there was any point in going any further, glared at the princess, bitterly.

“ What ?” Rainbow spat.

Bruh, I’m just waiting for one of them to just explode on twilight.

“It is not within my power to give the artifact, nor can I take it away. I am simply the guide.

You could just not tell them.

“Well, I’m going to bed. You three enjoy the luxuries of my vessel. Except you, Jackpot. I hope you have the most uncomfortable sleep you’ve ever had.”

I actually laughed at this.

“When I was little...I loved the stars. They were special to me, like I owned each one of them. There were some days when...I felt like I just couldn’t take it anymore...Being at home, I mean. Mom...and Dad, they just....they just never stopped. They always had something to be mad about. Like they liked being angry at each other. I’d listen sometimes, and usually I didn’t even understand what it was about, but every time it sounded like it was the breaking point. Like it couldn’t get any worse. And sometimes I would just leave….for anywhere else. Far away. When no one would know I was gone, at night. Because at night, the whole world is quiet. It was like this, right now...just peaceful. Nothing else to it. Just you and the stars. When I looked up there, I could forget about all my problems...my parents….that I...that I wasn’t good enough...all that, I could ignore, just for a little while. And only then, would I really feel happy…” Starlight said, feeling tears forming in her eyes. She sighed, relaxing her body even more, desperately trying to feel that same happiness in the current moment.

I was expecting jackpot to say that.

Starlight turned her head to look at him, into his tired, hopeful eyes. She cracked a smile, leaned in suddenly, and planted a kiss, right on his unexpecting mouth.

My heart would have been jumping for joy.

the book keeper
the book keeper #25 · Sep 30th, 2020 · · · Chapter Four: When the Whole World is Quiet ·
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Thanks again for another great chapter. I wonder when Starlight's path get entwined with both Twilight's and Chrysalis adventure. I hope you will be able to update again soon. I wounder if The Queen’s Jewel is related to Starlight Glimmer in someway anyway keep up the great work please update soon.

Pete100
Pete100 #26 · Oct 7th, 2020 · · · Chapter Five: A Friend In Need ·
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All I got from this is starlight x jackpot moments, twilight is still a psychopath, and chrysalis was captured, but escaped.

the book keeper
the book keeper #27 · Oct 7th, 2020 · · · Chapter Five: A Friend In Need ·
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Thanks for another good chapter I really am not looking forward to when Twilight and Chrysalis meet there is going to be fireworks. I hope we find out who is after Starlight as well keep up the good work I look forward to the next chapter I hope you will be able to update again soon.

Pete100
Pete100 #28 · Oct 14th, 2020 · · 3 · Chapter Six: Momentary Happiness ·
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Twilight had a tremendous headache. She was beginning to fear what she was doing to herself, that perhaps by the end of their virtuous quest, she would end up as corrupted as the monster they were hunting. She knew right from wrong, and yet, had never desired to see anypony be in pain so badly before. She began to feel the sting of guilt, for how she’d been treating her friends, for what she did to that dragon, and worst of all, for betraying Starlight’s memory. Deep down, she believed Starlight would disapprove of her desire for violent revenge. Thinking of her failed student put Twilight back into a dark place of remorse and regret, one that seemed inescapable.

Isn’t too late for that? Also, what does she mean by “betraying Starlight’s memory”?

“Because I know her! I trust her! And apparently none of you do, since you all thought Chrysalis was her!” Twilight yelled, angrily.

And she’s back to being crazy.

The other ponies all stayed quiet, ashamed for falsely blaming her. Twilight regretted her harshness almost instantly.

I mean you can’t really blame them.

“I’m sorry...I’m just...I just want to see her again, it’s just...I’m afraid she won’t like me anymore. That’s it…”

I would not have accepted that apology.

“I’ve treated you all poorly, and I’m sorry. I just...I just want to find Chrysalis, and put an end to all this madness.”

I don’t think that’s a good excuse.

“What would I do without you?” she said, glad she had friends to keep her heading past the brink of sanity.

Probably still be doing what you were doing not long ago.

“Yeah...one of the first things I bought when I got here,” she said, laughing at herself, “It was an impulsive buy. I thought I’d get to use it. Had to pawn all the records I got with it for the cash. That thing’s next, I guess but...I don’t want to get rid of it. I want it to motivate me, you know? Like maybe one day I can get those records back,” she said, forlornly.

I hope she does.

the book keeper
the book keeper #29 · Oct 14th, 2020 · · · Chapter Six: Momentary Happiness ·
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Thanks again for another good chapter. I wonder how Chrysalis is going to get out of this. I do hope that it wont be long until Twilight and Starlight meet again. I look foward to the next chapter and I hope you will be able to update again soon.

Waiting on my 20s
Waiting on my 20s #30 · Oct 15th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter One: A New Beginning ·
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Okay, so it seems to be that Chrysalis still has unfinished business with Starlight. So to find her, she's attempting to frame her. Framing her will alter the search for Starlight into a hunt for a mass murderer, which the Mane Six will embark on. To hunt down Starlight, probably kill her, or get Chrysalis close enough to capture her.

Pete100
Pete100 #31 · Oct 21st, 2020 · · · Chapter Seven: No Safe Haven ·
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Starlight stepped closer to the window and followed Elodea’s hoof, down to the streets below. She dropped her apple to the floor in shock, at the sight of at least sixteen royal guards exiting a parked carriage, rushing into the apartment complex.

How did they find her?

Along the streets of Saddleopolis, four ponies spontaneously arrived in a flash of light, all covered in dust and bruises. They fell to the sidewalk, pony pedestrians taking a moment to check if they were alive, and then continuing along, ignoring them.

Wow, that’s f*cked up.

“I take it you’re not one for any sort of introduction, Miss Glimmer. That’s quite alright. I already know much about you. In my time here I’ve been able to learn a great deal about what happens out there. And now you’re here. We so rarely bring ponies here, er...still breathing. Ponies...they are the takers. All they do is take what shouldn’t be theirs. But you, Miss Glimmer, you’re quite different. I’ve heard so much about you, it’s really quite strange to be meeting you in the flesh…”

Isn’t he a pony?

Then they were silenced, after the pony’s axe came down through the restrained pony’s neck, separating his head from his body, blood jetting out in every possible direction. Chrysalis flinched, which she found odd of herself to do, given how well-acquainted she was with death. But something about the nature of that stallion’s death just didn’t sit right with her.

Character Development?

“And they call me mad ,” he said aloud, staring off into nothing. He seemed to neither love nor hate what he had brought about. Merely, he was weeding out the evil of Equestria he so despised. To him, it was a natural obligation.

Ok, I don’t understand comrade at all.

Twilight relented, dropping him to the ground as the crowd hissed and jeered at him. Savoy glared at Twilight, enraged. Twilight remained unimpressed.

I would be mad too.

She helped the colt to his hooves. The colt clearly didn’t want to help them, but given she had the power to kill him in an instant, he knew he didn’t really have a choice.

She would have to kill me.

the book keeper
the book keeper #32 · Oct 21st, 2020 · · · Chapter Seven: No Safe Haven ·
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Wow what a chapter I was seating on the edge of my seat while i was reading. I do hope that Elodea dose not betray them when they get Vanhoover alos I can't belive that Luna is now after them also I can just see it now that if they are betrayed they will be a entire army of Royal guards wating for them. Keep up the great work I look forward to the next chapter I hope you will be able to update again soon.

Pete100
Pete100 #33 · Oct 28th, 2020 · · · Chapter Eight: Escape From Saddleopolis ·
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“If we find her...you have to kill her,” the colt said, his guilt slowly being replaced by a vengeful hatred. Twilight blinked a few times, and simply smiled, a delightful, cruel, half-delirious smile.

“Oh, I’m going to kill her.”

Look who’s back to being crazy.

the book keeper
the book keeper #34 · Oct 28th, 2020 · · · Chapter Eight: Escape From Saddleopolis ·
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Can't Starlight's group catch a break it like the whole world has it in for her I do hope that it gets easier for them. Also when Twilight finds Chrysalis I wouldn't like be in Chrysails shoes as I dread what Twilight is goin g to do to her. I also hope that it won't be long until Twilight and Starlight meet again as that would be an interesting event in it's self. Thanks for another great chapter I hope you will be able to update again soon.

Pete100
Pete100 #35 · Nov 4th, 2020 · · · Chapter Nine: Something To Live For ·
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The ground beneath them suddenly began to rupture, and tear itself apart, beneath it rising a form, burly and primal, hairy, with powerful, defined muscles that stretched beneath its leathery skin. It had the proportions of a bat, with large, arm-like forelegs, and smaller hind legs. It was covered in wiry brown hair, and had horrible claws, that were like a handful of sharpened knives. It’s head resembled that of a wolf or a dog, with yellow and red eyes, pointed ears, razor sharp teeth, and a thick snout. It stood almost the size of a school bus, towering over the ponies.

Is that really what a behemoth looks like?

“I’ve studied this beast in books. I knew we’d have to face it.”

When?

Dust, without thinking, retrieved the weapon, until she realized what he intended for her to do with it.

“Jackpot, I can’t kill anypony!”

“It’s us or them!”

Welp, that’s an easy decision.

“Starlight, you can’t take the fall for whatever that changeling is doing!” she said.

How does she know she’s a changeling?

Starlight shook her head regretfully. The more ponies on their side, the better.

Is it?

the book keeper
the book keeper #36 · Nov 4th, 2020 · · · Chapter Nine: Something To Live For ·
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What a chapter I can't believe Twilight's group are giving up. It's for reasons like this that Chrysalis will succeed in her plans. I do wonder when the truth will come out about her identity. I do hope that in the end Starlight becomes a princess after making a massive sacrifice in stoping Chrysalis fingers cross.

Keep up the great work I look forward to the next chapter I hope you will be able to update again soon.

superfun
superfun #37 · Nov 6th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter Nine: Something To Live For ·
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I just hope this ultimately has a happier ending than the first one

superfun
superfun #38 · Nov 6th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter Nine: Something To Live For ·
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I'm also curious how long this one is going to be in comparison to the first one.

I kind of hope it ends up a bit shorter, but that also seems unlikely

titanhades70
titanhades70 #39 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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Starlight never seems to catch a break.

Pete100
Pete100 #40 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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“This isn’t about me, or you. This is about her ,” Jackpot said, glancing back at a heartfelt Starlight. Dust bit her lip in jealousy.

I can’t believe this is happening.

Dust found herself hesitating, to her surprise. On one hoof, she was beginning to get tired of watching Starlight and Jackpot grow closer to each other, but on the other hoof, they were her friends.

You had your chance, get over it.

“Princess, we found this pony trying to sneak into the local armory, while we were on patrol. We believe she came from the forest...She’s been extraordinarily hostile, she’s already sent four of the locals to the infirmary.”

Was that before or after they pinned her down?

Applejack, whose hoof was on Violet’s neck, pressed harder, trying to force the truth out of her.

Oh no, I wouldn’t tell them sh*t, now.

The red unicorn swung the club down one last time, hard, carving a hole into Jackpot’s head, smashing his skull in.

Starlight is going to kill her.

superfun
superfun #41 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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I really can't wait for when things start turning around for her.

Shiny Kelp
Shiny Kelp #42 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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Wait, am I dumb or is that first Twilight section repeated from the previous chapter?
Edit: No, I'm not crazy. The first section is the same as the previous chapter's last section.

the book keeper
the book keeper #43 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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WOW just WOW I can't believe it poor Starlight it's like she can't ever catch a break she has lost all her friends that she made I do hope that in the end of this Stralight becomes an Alicorn as I feel she has totally earned it or becomes an element of harmony personal I do feel she should become an Alicorn in the end of all this. I aslo liked THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK refrence very nice touch. I hope you will update again soon I'm totally hooked on your story keep up the great work.

Shiny Kelp
Shiny Kelp #45 · Nov 11th, 2020 · · · Chapter Ten: The Reunion ·
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Well now that I've actually managed to read the chapter...
I kinda saw this coming, given your tendency of killing off side characters, it was a matter of time that either Dust or Jackpot died; though I expected Elodea to be the first victim. Didn't expect it to happen this early, nor this brutally, though. Dayum.

Xp45
Xp45 #46 · Nov 18th, 2020 · · · Chapter Eleven: The Troubled Trio ·
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The Plot thickens to a hard crisp

Pete100
Pete100 #47 · Nov 18th, 2020 · · · Chapter Eleven: The Troubled Trio ·
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She recalled what Jackpot had told her, to accept herself and focus on moving forward.

When did he say that?

Starlight spent most of the time in the shower crying, the paper-thin walls of the hotel room providing easy access for Elodea’s ears. Elodea winced at the heartbreaking whimpers leaking from the bathroom. She wasn’t typically one to be emotional, though something about Starlight’s plight softened her.

Something?

Twilight, who wanted to preserve her energy for the upcoming confrontation, sat inside the mighty carriage they had been traveling with, sitting across from Cadance. Violet was forced to help pull the carriage, and was not to be given any breaks for the entire duration of their trek up into the mountains. They had outfitted her with cuffs around her ankles and her neck, that were all chained to the carriage, preventing her from running off. As one could imagine, she was less than pleased with this arrangement.

They would have had me f*cked up.

Elodea had already dropped the lighter onto her trail of gunpowder that led around the house, setting a small fragment of its rear ablaze. Starlight was mortified, having just gone out of her way to spare Counterfeit, believing it to be morally correct.

“Starlight, if we let them live, they’ll tell those other ponies we’re coming. Didn’t you hear him? He just wants to save his own skin. You’ve already lost one friend. We can’t give them an opportunity to take some more.”

Starlight wished there was another way, but it was far too late already, half the building having already gone up in flames. Strangely, Starlight heard no pounding from Counterfeit trying to escape, and hoped that if he was dead, it hadn’t been too painful.

Wait, won’t that make people think the scourge of the south is there?

“Hey, asshole! Look at me! You’re done for! It’s over! But listen, you still got time to tell me one thing, can you do that?”

Damn, I was expecting him to help him.

“I told you, I followed you from the docks. Counterfeit, the pony you jumped, I’ve been on his case for months. I was upstairs the whole time you were strangling the shit out of him.”

So, they technically should be arrested?

Starlight recalled that red unicorn, who had so mercilessly killed Jackpot, her sinister smile, her heartless indifference to Starlight’s cries. Now she finally had a name for the face. Ruby Heart.

So both her and twilight is crazy?

“Not my business to clear that up...And I don’t buy that, even with this ‘I care about my friends’ act...You just burned down a house with two ponies inside, you know.”

I would’ve been the same way.

Chrysalis turned her head slowly, as Twilight Sparkle exited out of the darkness, her mouth agape and her face red with anger at the sight of Chrysalis in her Starlight disguise. Chrysalis’s eye twitched in frustration, which worsened, when an entire entourage of ponies filed out of the darkness behind Twilight, nervously shuffling around the circular sides of the room, trying to encircle Chrysalis. Chrysalis saw not just Starlight’s friends, but Cadance, Shining Armor, and a host of soldiers, all prepared for a fight.

Is that really them?

superfun
superfun #48 · Nov 18th, 2020 · · 1 · Chapter Eleven: The Troubled Trio ·
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Glad to see things starting to turn around

the book keeper
the book keeper #49 · Nov 18th, 2020 · · · Chapter Eleven: The Troubled Trio ·
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Finally the truth is out I hope from here onwards it gets easier for Starlight and I do hope it won't be long untilTwilight and Starlight meet again I hope there is going to be a new Alicorn on the cards fingers cross. I hope you will be able to update again soon keep up the great work I look forward to the next chapter.

Waiting on my 20s
Waiting on my 20s #50 · Nov 19th, 2020 · · · Chapter Seven: No Safe Haven ·
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“Hey!” cried one of the guards, before being incinerated by Chrysalis’ spell. She blasted every building, pony, and tree in sight, setting fire to the entire village. While the village was thrown into a panic, Violet assumed they would make a run for it while they had the chance. Yet Chrysalis just continued on through the town, up the cliffs towards the top of the hill, destroying everything in her path.

Dude, I love your story, but sweet Jesus, the pacing is awful. This is just an example of what you’ve been doing throughout. I mean, you’re telling me Chrysalis set fire to everything in one paragraph? That should be six paragraphs! Three, at least.

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