A Beautiful Lie (Or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Become a Totalitarian Dictator)

by Leondude

We Have So Many Questions

“And then I conquered the rest of Equestria and turned the Young Six into a big popsicle,” Tom stately rather chuffly, “The end.”

The princesses stared at the unicorn overlord, gobsmacked by how easily Tom took over the majority of Equestria’s population with nothing but his wits, a few mind-control spells, and surprisingly effective use of Discord’s magic. It was as if he knew where Tirek, Discord and even King Sombra went right but was smart enough to not repeat their mistakes nor to underestimate potential developments that would have otherwise blindsided him. They were also horrified by his ruthlessness and willingness to destroy his enemies without hesitation, even though he could have bent them to his will just as he did everypony else. But despite the odds being against them, they still had one ace in the hole. And knowing Tom’s ego was exacerbated by the Alicorn Amulet’s influence, they knew it wouldn't be long until Tom was defeated like every other opponent they faced. And Tom needed to be defeated because not even Trixie went as far as to kill anypony when she was under the Amulet’s influence.

“You said you destroyed the Elements of Harmony even though you have most of the element bearers under your spell,” Celestia said inquisitively, “Tell me, what are you going to do about the Plunderseeds and, by extension, the Everfree Forest?”

Tom scoffed, “Isn’t it obvious? I’m gonna give the ponies with the right talents jobs in containing the resulting overgrowth, starting with your mentor.”

“But what of the wildlife?” Luna asked.

“Like everypony in the land, except you three because I was in a hurry, I assimilated them,” Tom casually replied.

“To continue off of Celestia’s question, why did you destroy the Elements of Harmony?” Twilight asked “You already mind-controlled one of my friends and then moved on to the rest of them. Doesn’t that seem kinda overkill?”

“Not really because a group of individuals that possess all the necessary qualities to wield the Elements and Rainbow Power might become a threat to me and, if fortune favours them, they might resist my efforts at controlling them just like you did,” Tom replied.

“Is that why you froze my students today?” Twilight asked.

“Yes,” Tom bluntly stated, “But if you’re worried that I might have killed them, I can assure you it’s the cartoony non-lethal freezing so the worst they’d have to deal with once I eventually free them is a common cold. I may be an evil overlord but I’m not pure evil. Just a necessary one.”

“You murdered an entire race just because you can’t be bothered to claim their territory!” Luna exclaimed, “And in a slow and painful manner, no less! How is the extinction of an entire race necessary?!”

“Okay, maybe I went a bit too far with killing all the seaponies,” Tom said casually, “But it makes it easier for me to check on my subjects so it’s not really that bad. Besides, I can’t have turned the sea into unmeltable ice or into a big pile of sand. Everypony would die of thirst if I did that. So what’s a small sacrifice in the name of order?”

“I’d hardly consider enslaving everypony to your will to be harmonious,” Luna stated.

“Did I say harmony?” Tom asked rhetorically, “No. I said order. They are very different things. And as you can see, I have brought peace, justice, and security to my new empire!”

Luna raised an eyebrow, “Your new empire?”

“Yes,” Tom replied, “I shall call it the Equestrian Mental Unification. And since I have been rambling for too long and, for all I know, an alien invasion might have started in my distracted state, I’m gonna do what I should have done when I absorbed all of your magic.”

Before Tom could have the chance to enthrall the three alicorns before him, Sunset Shimmer and the Humane Six burst through the cottage door in spectacular fashion. Being very much aware that destroying the entrances to the human world should have been one of the first things he did in his conquest, Tom counted on their arrival and was more than ready to rectify this little error of his.

“Aw, yeah!” the alternate Rainbow exclaimed, “The cavalry has arri-”

“Nope,” Tom stated as he zapped them with the-oh, you get the idea.

The three princesses stared in shock at how easily Tom dealt with the alternate element bearers, something that Tom picked up on almost immediately.

“What did you expect?” Tom asked with a shrug, “It’s not like I couldn’t see with my own two eyes that they were not corrupted nor controlled in any way and therefore sit on my throne and expect them to fail in their attempts at turning me into stone. Also, need I remind you that I enthralled this world’s element bearer’s before they had the chance to blast me with a rainbow laser as well?!”

After another rant, Tom calmly breathed in then out and proceeded to rob the princesses of their free will. Deciding he needed to be prepared for his invasion of Farasi, he sat back down and continued reading the list of things an evil overlord should and should not do.

“Number 36,” Tom muttered to himself as he read the list, “I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.”

Author's Note:

And that's the story of Tom.

Would have made it longer but, after a while, it would just be the same thing over and over. Tom invades place then controls its denizens. Then again, maybe I should have shown him murdering all of the seaponies rather than saying it happened. Though, if I did that, it would have resulted in the story going down a seriously dark path.

Comments

[Horseus King of Horses]

“Did I say harmony?” Tom asked rhetorically, “No. I said order. They are very different things. And as you can see, I have brought peace, justice, and security to my new empire!”

Luna raised an eyebrow, “Your new empire?”

Tom Skywalker then jumps towards Luna Kenobi with a lightsaber.

[Leondude]

10800092
Yeah, I was not subtle with that reference. And given what day tomorrow is, why would I be?

Though, if you have a keen eye, you would notice Tom left "freedom" out of that quote. Tells you all you need to know about Tom, doesn't it?

[Horseus King of Horses]

10800155
I actually forgot that freedom was in the original line.

Also, yep.

[Kadigan]

Now that I've gone through this (surprisingly short, but quite to the point) story, I felt I needed to point out a particular issue: the god of this story was on Tom's side.

I'm not saying it's bad - or good, for that matter. It simply is, and it seems to have influenced a number of events (like him being OP from the get-go) in his favour. He's essentially guilty of winning by plot-induced circumstance himself, and all of his predispositions, ruthlessness and so on only add flavour to a story that was resolved long before the first word was even written.

In the end, the story is for our amusement, so it's not like I find this flaw particularly egregious, no. But if there was some sort of moral to the story, it essentially defeats itself.

The story is, in itself, a beatiful lie. :-)

[Leondude]

10858837

The story is, in itself, a beatiful lie. :-)

Heh. I never thought about it like that.