• Member Since 30th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen March 19th


The wheel kept turning: ages came, time passed us by. We lived in perfect harmony!


When Celestia doesn't seem to be putting in a solid two months' work on raising the sun, Dash and the other weather ponies unite and fight!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 23 )

And this is how Celestia fucked up being ruler of Equestria

I was going to say, Rainbow had a very fair request, despite her approach.

Then I got to the last letter. :derpytongue2:

This was really good! Practically no (if any) unintentional errors that I could spot! (I friggin' love "borj-waw" :rainbowlaugh:)

Three days in, Rainbow Dash was assassinated. Unable to stand a muffin-free world, Derpy removed her from power, declared that "As muffins are happiness AND life, let them eat muffins." and became princess of a utopian Equestria. Everyone was happy and well fed, the sun rose and set regularly, and Celestia(s) NOT WELCOME!!!

(Luna is cool though)

I have a feeling THIS will become your best-known story, and it is quite hilarious and sharp-witted to boot.

This good.

Headcanon accepted.

This needs another chapter or sequel.

Dear Retired Celestia,

You know, turning Rainbow Dash’s entirely legitimate request to actually raise the sun into what the Stable-Street Journal is calling, “the strike that busted unions” might not have been a good idea.

Your faithful student,
Princess Twilight Sparkle

Yeah... turns out countering a perfectly legitimate strike with a massive political gaff while you laze around and get shit-faced is actually a bad idea, who knew?

You know what? It kinda does. I never managed to work in anarchists and austerity measures.
If you don't mind, could I take that thing about Derpy and run with it?

So... equestrian ponies have no bread, and celestia eats cake?
Prepare the gillotine! :pinkiecrazy:

Feel free!

Y'know, flattery will get you everywhere.

I'd be careful if I was Celestia. If she's retired and Rainbow Dash is a Princess, what's stopping RD from having Starlight commandeer Celestia's cutie mark and give it to someone else to raise the sun?

Thaaaanks! It really is another great punchline to the whole thing :heart:.

Ah, simple: Dashie doesn't have Celestia's cutie mark. She's going to have to organize a bunch of unicorns to do the astronomy.

8295658 She doesn't have Celestia's cutie mark currently. But since Starlight can yank it right off the Flanks that Pancakes Built and put it on some random unicorn, and Rainbow Dash can authorize this as a Princess....

I'm really wondering how you're planning for Starlight, an ordinary-sized unicorn, to hold down Celestia - an alicorn princess with the magic all three tribes - long enough for the Staff of SamenessLance of Longinus to actually work.

8296027 She did it once already, ripped the cutie mark right off Celestia's flank and gave it to another pony in an instant. It takes a second, the victim merely needs to be in proximity, not touch, and is Celestia really going to resist? This would be happening under the lawful orders of a princess, so Discord could freely help in "holding Celestia down" if he wants to. If Celestia resists then she is an outlaw, holding the sun hostage.


She did it once already, ripped the cutie mark right off Celestia's flank and gave it to another pony in an instant.

... Did I miss the episode where this happened?

8297519 Sounds like you did. Have you not watched "A Royal Problem" yet? It aired officially in the US a month ago.


One of the relative recent episodes, actually. Though it was less 'ripping off' and more 'Freaky Friday'. Luna and Celestia were having a 'your job is easier than my job' fight spanning across a few days, so Starlight switched their cutie marks so they could do the whole 'mindswap' thing.

Why did Starlight do this? Twilight asked her to. : ^)

Watched that episode. Really loved seeing Starlight drive Twilight into panic attacks and then be proved right :rainbowkiss:.


>tfw your bureaucracy is so old, it's gone through multiple number systems.

In any case, yeah, I don't see this ending well for Celestia. Twilight may have had to brute force the sun the first time around, but she'll probably have the cosmos dancing to her tune within the month.

All told, most amusing. Thanks for linking to it.

Aside from assassinating Fast Horse, I'm okay with this.

Lets be honest. Rainbow won't even last a week before she surrenders everything back to Celestia and Luna. Why? Because Rainbow is nowhere near competent enough for this. Neither is Starlight for that matter.

Me thinks the sisters did this on purpose. To teach the ungrateful twats of Equestria why you don't mess with them and why Equestria needs them. And to get a break.

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