• Member Since 22nd Dec, 2015
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

SmokeTester


This is probably a bad idea

E

Sunset Shimmer has no place to go for Christmas. Although she says she doesn’t mind, the truth is she's already feeling very lonely. Seeing her friend in distress, Fluttershy steps up and invites Sunset to spend Christmas with her family. But there’s something Fluttershy isn’t telling Sunset - something she hasn’t told any of their friends.

Author’s Note: I am aware of IDW’s ‘Equestria Girls Holiday Special’ comic, but this story disregards it in favor of exploring my own ideas.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 19 )

merry christmas to you! and thank you for this wonderful andheart warming story! and thank you so much for showing fluttershy in all her sweet ways, she is the best! this story in it self was a wonderful gift! well done to you!!

What a sweet story. Very much in the spirit of MLP and the holiday.

There are a few places which had me guessing about how things were going to pan out. Though I was able to predict some of them, the details took some pretty unexpected twists and turns. The characters are also well-written, particularly the banter between Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack... the whole scene is awesome :pinkiesmile:

Hadn't heard of a Caucasian Shepherd before. Looked it up and was pretty impressed by the size. At least they don't look unfriendly... except the growling pictures, yeesh :rainbowderp:

Maybe a few minor things might've been glossed over, though they weren't essential to the story. For example, what type of Christmas traditions would the character's family have? Might've been neat to read a bit more about.

Found a two minor errors:

"But It is a big deal," accidental capital it.

Fluttershy said, her void a little uneasy. void, think you meant voice

Whew! So yeah, awesome first story. Glad you were able to make it in time for the holiday. Thanks for sharing and Merry Christmas to ya! :eeyup:

6764261 I'm very glad you enjoyed it! Merry Christmas to you as well! Also, the P-61 was a fine aircraft :rainbowdetermined2:

6765092 Thank you very much, sir! I had a lot of fun writing this story, and I am happy to see people enjoying it. That is very rewarding.

I did sort of gloss over some things, but that was on purpose. The nature of the holiday can be somewhat divisive among people with different world views, and I wanted to keep everything is general as possible. Make it about the story and not inject my own world view, or favor that of another. I think we can all agree that this is a time for people coming together, regardless of race, blood or creed, so I made it about that.

And thank you for pointing out the mistakes. It is amazing how we can miss those even after reading it over and over, isn't it? I'll fix those today.

Merry Christmas to you good sir!

Heheheh. Fluttershy would have a giant loveable dogstrosity like that.

THIS:
dog-breeds-expert.com/images/caucasian-shepherd-attacking-courtesy-crackdotcom.jpg

Turns into THIS:
2puppies.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Caucasian-Shepherd-Dog.jpg

Nature is so fascinating.

A very heartwarming (pun intended, :trollestia:) holiday tale, :twilightsmile:
s6.postimg.org/5pzpmopep/Pirate_Approved2.jpg

6772117 I figured that's the closest I could get to her having a bear in the biped world. Not that she would mind having a bear. :yay:

6775515 I'm very glad you enjoyed it! And I'm also glad it has been Pirate Approved :twilightsmile:

good story thoe im shocked that hard steel and ruby have not adopted fluttershy

7517946 Thanks!

Though, I think you might be just a little bit confused...

6765092

Hadn't heard of a Caucasian Shepherd before. Looked it up and was pretty impressed by the size. At least they don't look unfriendly... except the growling pictures, yeesh :rainbowderp:

It's not the biggest of the Asian breeds either. There are a few that compare favorably to the smaller breeds of horses.

7524900
Being foster parents implies that they haven't adopted her yet. Otherwise they would be her actual parents.

7604150

Being foster parents implies that they haven't adopted her yet. Otherwise they would be her actual parents.

Oh, right. That makes sense. I guess that's what I get for not reading my own story for like nine months. Also I was a bit thrown by the Hard Steel comment :twilightsmile:

okay, the begining of this fic was brilliant. it was at first confusing me with what i'd read in the short description and then when it got to the hooded figure outside the window i wanted to hi-five you, good author. that was wonderfully done.

in regards to fluttershy's family, soon as i read whom you made her parents and the fact she was adopted, a stupid part of me wanted to call out "Wrong! We've seen her parents!" but seeing as this was written BEFORE Flutter Brutter, i was able to let it slide. Plus, it also kinda would still work anyway. you could say that this is what human fluttershy had happen to her that derails away from her pony counterpart. after all, we know that has happened a fair bit, Twilight being the prime example.

Also, i do love how you worked Fluttershy's brother in before he was officially canon due to his intro episode and fluttershy saying “That’s another long story,” i felt was perfect, especially since we all now know what he's like and would explain why fluttershy didn't go into detail, even though i know that wasn't you're plan for this fic.

overall, a lovely read, even if we're not in the christmas/hearth's warming season yet.

7620621

Thanks for the kind words!

Yeah, I wrote this for Christmas 2015 (released December 24, 2015) and that was well before we were introduced to Fluttershy's family. At the time, there had not been a single mention of her family, and her having a brother was only something that had been mentioned was upcoming, but hadn't been fleshed out yet. I'm glad that it (sort of) worked out in my favor.

Of course, "Flutter Brutter" utterly smashed my headcanon, but like you say, it's possible it could still apply in the EQG world (for now).

Thanks again!

Who are you, why are you so good at this, and how do you not work for hasbro yet?

7847469 How do you know I don't?
......
...
..
Okay, I don't.

Seriously, though, thanks for the kindness :twilightsmile:

7848534 ah no problem. But really, look for a story writer job at hasbro. You deserve it.

7848540
7848534
Yeah, seriously! Hasbro would be idiots not to at the very least consider you as a writer!

8046125 Why, thank you! Though, I'm not sure if my track record of roughly one story a year would fly in a professional environment :twilightblush:

8046976 Quality over quantity my friend.

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