Chapter 1
It was nice to get together like this. Applejack thought to herself, sipping at her cider contently. Just to get together and unwind with her friends in Twilight's library. Twilight had closed the library early that day just for this getaway from the busy week her and her friends were having. She even gave Spike the day off, who went with the Crusaders on their latest endeavour for cutie marks.
Applejack sat listening to Twilight and Rarity. Twilight was discussing all the ponies with over due books and her latest friendship report she had sent to the Princess. Rarity was bragging all about her latest dress order from Canterlot and her new colt friend.
Across the room Applejack could see Fluttershy doing the same listening to Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash talk about Pinkie’s new cake creation at Sugar Cube Corners. As Rainbow went on about all of the clouds the weather patrol was moving that week and the Wonderbolts recent show.
Applejack made her way over the yellow pegasus to share about their own week and other happenings in the town.
“So how about you Sugar Cube, How's things with you and all them little critters?” Applejack asked Fluttershy, who turned to Applejack with a warm smile. She was all too happy to talk abut her animal friends.
“Oh... Their good, all my chickens are laying eggs and the upcoming bunny census is just around the corner and I can't wait to see all the new bunny's!” Fluttershy calmed Her eyes wide with excitement at the thought of all the new bunny's.
“Who-wee, it must be hard work going n' counting all them little critters? Don't they send you somepony to help you find n' count em all up?” Applejack asked curiously.
“Who?...”
“I'd recon the same ponies that pay ya ta take care of all them critters?”Applejack wondered out loud. Scratching her head under her hat, at the odd remark.
“But I'm not paid....” Fluttershy stopped. Realizing what she just said, covering her mouth with her forehooves. Trying to hide her self from her friend's puzzled look.
“So... If your not paid to look after all those animals, then what are you paid to do?”Twilight asked out of her own curiosity when she over heard Fluttershy. Now making her way over to the yellow pegasus and Applejack to join in. Followed by Rarity, the white unicorn displeased that Twilight left her in mid sentence.
“Ya who counts bunny's for nothing?” Rainbow asked, now hovering over the purple unicorn and Pinkie Pie. All before Fluttershy knew it she had her five best friends surrounding her, all wondering why she wouldn't be getting paid to take care of all those animals?
“So who looks after that many animals if they're not paid to?... Come to think of it are you even a licensed vet?” Rainbow asked for the group. Hovering above them, her forehooves crossed.
Fluttershy merely retreated behind her pink mane avoiding the stares and accusations from her friends and the mounting pressure she could feel being put on her. Twilight was first to come to her friend knowing the yellow pegasus was uncomfortable with the situation, but still looking for an answer to their question herself, to feed her own curiosity.
“It's OK you can tell us.”Twilight said trying to reassure her friend.
Fluttershy retreated further into her mane, trying to hide her eyes welling up with tears from her friends, unwilling to answer, unwilling to tell them how she got any of her bits.
“It's all right you can tell us, you're among friends here and what ever ya say is safe with us.” Applejack said trying to get her friend to open up, and that she could tell them anything.
“Ya it's not like some pony's going to write about it.” Rainbow laughed. Still hovering above them.
“I SUED RUBBER COLT!” Flutershy yelled out of the pressure to end her interrogation. Curling up into a heap on the floor tears filling her eyes. Looking out from behind her mane to meet her friend's stunned faces. Rarity fainted to the floor, Rainbow stopped hovering and landed with a thud between an equally shocked Applejack and Twilight. The only pony that seemed unaffected was Pinkie Pie, who was left bouncing about the now silent room.
“Rubber Colt aren’t they a balloon maker?”The pink party pony asked. Stopping to rub her chin with her hoof.
“No.... Pinkie they're a condom manufacturer” Twilight said quietly, to correct Pinkie.
“That's silly, why would Flutershy need to sue a condom maker?” Pinkie Pie wondered out loud, stepping between Rainbow and Applejack. Both wondering the same thing she was.
Flutershy was now a heap of yellow and pink. On the floor coming to the sad realization that she had to tell her friends the truth about apart of her past she would have liked to have forgotten.
/ / /
Rarity finally came to, gasping for breath still shocked at the news of her friend.
“You mean to tell us you were one of the ponies in the Rubber Colt lawsuit!” Rarity explained between gasps still trying to get to her hooves.
“What's the Rubber Colt lawsuit?” Twilight asked assuming that if she didn’t know, no pony did. As she tried to help Rarity to her wobbly hooves.
Rarity pulled her self up with Twilight's help and made her way over to the mess on the floor that was Fluttershy, throwing her forehooves around her friend's neck in a sympathetic hug. To explain the incident.
“The Rubber Colt lawsuit all started back when a bunch of defective condoms got through quality control and then a bunch of unsuspecting ponies ended up getting pregnant! Why they then sued for compensation of course, it was all over the news when it happened.” The white unicorn claimed. Still holding her friend.
“Ya we can see why you'd need to follow it closely.”Rainbow muttered to a giggling Pinkie Pie.
“So... what you're trying to say is Fluttershy was one of those ponies.” Twilight said looking to Fluttershy, who gave them a sad nod that she was right about being one of the ponies involved in the lawsuit.
Flutershy remembered back to the sad days of the lawsuit and what had to happen to get her involved in them. All the pressure of being on the stand. Wondering what would happen when it was all over and done. With a deep breath she explained how it all happened.
“It was my first year at veterinary school.” The nervousness ever present in the shy pegasus voice as she carried on. “when I met this nice earth pony in one of my classes. We went out for awhile before “it” happened. Then when I found out I was pregnant and told him he dropped out of school and skipped town, I never saw him again after that.” Fluttershy cried, her painful memories of the pony that left her slowly returning. “That's when I had to drop out of school. and join the lawsuit my self.” Taking in another deep breath to allow her self to continue. “When it was all over I moved to Ponyville and gave my filly up for adoption, and I've had enough to live off of ever since.” Fluttershy cried no longer holding back her tears as she watched them hit the floor, trying to chase away her pain.
“Fluttershy we had no idea that's what happened and giving your filly up for adoption, that must have been very difficult.” Twilight said with the deepest sympathy for her friend.
“I know you must think I'm a horrible pony!” Fluttershy cried out, letting more and more tears roll down her face.
“No we don't think you're a horrible pony.” Twilight said moving to the side of the yellow pegasus, now openly sobbing on the floor between her's and Rarity's embrace.
“You mean you're not mad?”Fluttershy choked between her tears.
“Of course we're not mad at you. We just wa'n know what kind of pony could just get up and abandon the sweetest, kindest pony we ever met and pregnant to.” Applejack said with disdain at the thought. Moving to Fluttershy to console the still crying pegasus in a group hug with her and all her friends.
Fluttershy pushed her self away from her friend's hug, wiping away the tears in her eyes. She thought to her self if she came this far she could tell her friends what happened to the filly she gave up.
“Whats wrong?” Asked Pinkie Pie, in the disbelief of somepony being sad in a group hug.
“Its nothing just the filly I gave up you all know her.” Fluttershy let out in a sigh, turning to Applejack and Rarity in particularly.
“It's Scootaloo.”
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Interesting premise, but your grammar and prose need some work.
This could likely be very good if expanded upon and maybe cleaned up a bit.
huh. makes sense. they're both bad fliers.
How did I see that plot twist coming?
Anyway, it's short, well written, and knows what it's trying to do. I like it.
good plot, kept me engaged, but i feel as though the writing leaves something to be desired. and it's been said a million times to everybody on this site, but grammar. each error is like a burst of static when watching the show.
621461
Think about it, Fluttershy is a pegasus who can only fly to certain heights, and can't fly as freely as most pegasi
Chicken = a bird that can only fly to certain heights, and can't fly as freely as most birds
Makes perfect sense
Faved.
Needs heavy grammar fixes.
Sugarcube Corner
sugarcube,
about
wan't
And many more that I'm too lazy to sort through.
I'd say get a prereader and sort through this, clean it up, and smooth out some rough spots. It has the potential to be really good, but it'll need a nice buff to make it presentable.
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia.png
img.ponibooru.org/_images/39554d6adaa296352ab2f996928a9927/45505%20-%20macro%20seems_legit.PNG
Very nice one-shot, like the idea of her being Scoots mom. Really short, sweet, and good. Could see this becoming the beginning of a longer story. Good Job!
And this is complete? Why?
lookatmyhappyrainbow.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/why.jpg
Dude.. its bunnIES... 'IES'
Now the gist of my critique is the same as everybody else, I really like the idea behind it, like ,very much, its totally new. But the execution was a bit less interesting. The dialogue is very hit and miss and overall it should have been longer to accomodate more subtelty.
Keep going !
What a twist!
621455
Precisely...
It's like you read my mind
Apart from the grammar errors, the story's pretty interesting - good ending too! Now my mind is full of derp
I suggest getting "White Smoke" to help you out with your grammar.
"It's Scootaloo"
I literally fell off my bed at that! (My laptop was on my bed)
WAHT A
!!
Okay I wasn't expecting that.
Though I did see the ending coming as soon as it mentioned "adoption".
Looking toward to what happens next.
Vet school-- chicken-- IT ALL MAKES SENSE
OK that ending, we need a sequel now. Shy and scoot must be reunited!
Actually now I'd like to know how old the mane 6 are I'm thinking somewhere between 16 and 21
Wait, but... I... And Fluttershy, she... Condoms... Scootaloo... Buh?
On a more serious note, that was really well done! I wish it was a bit longer, it felt a bit rushed. But it was a solid story, and you wrote well!
Four Scoots for you!
static4.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/3707814+_96c4ceacb8acb71c4dd120ab7c9d0dfa.gif comprehend how it happened. My mind is blown.
.....*BSOD*
3.bp.blogspot.com/-yh1aP7MH-UE/Tfg8BiLCN8I/AAAAAAAAF6w/WLMkujKkGX0/s320/24519+-+artist+kloudmutt+fluttershy+scootaloo.png
Whoa!! Did not see that coming!!
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SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL
Wait... Why is this in the Flutterdash group?
Fluttershy is Scootaloo's MOTHER?!
Oh buck it all makes sense now.
Well that threw me for a loop.
Failure to know the difference between 'They're,' 'Their' and 'There'; failure to know how to use an apostrophe, (it does not mean look out, here comes an 's'!); so overall grammar fail, and pacing feels off. But I love the plot. It needs more. You can't end on that line without a continuation. Get to woik!!!
626471 That's what I want to know!
Sequel please
Hilarious premise, but damn you need to go back and fix it up. Your spelling, grammar, sentence structure, they're all over the bloody place and it makes the piece hard to read.
Wasted...potential...that's all I see.
I suggest an editor.
This story had a REALLY good idea and then...it...it has errors...all over it. So many errors...
Also, I'd like to see it continued, it doesn't really feel like a one-shot.
Don't get me wrong, I liked it, but I still could barely see past all the errors.
PLOT TWIST!
+ ???= 
i could see that
1915040 I see whst you did there
this feels like this should go on, whether its a sequel or simply adding more chapters. Pontential is what there is, if you don't grab it and use it, you're going to let so many fans down
Bet the inspiration for this came from this image?