• Published 14th May 2015
  • 3,474 Views, 136 Comments

Shattered Souls: Sunny Town - Brony Parasite



A Brony goes to Brony-con, and gets sent to his favorite show as Pinkamena. But sarrow takes its hold on him, and he must protect Equestria from monsters, MLP bad guys, Sunny Town, and... Himself...

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Plans*Super-Short(Sorry)*

Author's Note:

I haven't had the time to write, but I'll try and fix my schedule. If I had one...

But I'll be working hard from now on!

{Third PoV}

And there was none. Well, none that weren’t booked anyway. Apparently there was a coronation, and the ‘purple killer’ as Fourth called her, was now a Princess. That just made the mare all the more scared.

Fourth Wall and Mitta settled for an empty alleyway with two trash cans(thank god they weren’t full).

The two slept next to one another to keep warm, but that didn’t help much. When they woke up, Fourth didn’t feel good. Luckily she didn’t have a cold. They’d need all the pony power they could muster for taking down Sunny Town.

Then there was this ‘Displaced’ thing. How or why would anypony need her? Sure she had some of Pinkie’s powers over physics, and even some skill with knives(though how, she wasn’t sure). But how would that help someone who was fighting something even Blood Cleaver couldn’t face? She shook the thought out of her head.

“That was tough on my stomach…” Fourth mumbled, to which Mitta nodded.

“We need to get something to help use. I think I got a cramp…” Mitta lazily stood up. The front of her red mane was sticking up. Fourth Wall laughed her flank off. “What’s so…” The undead pony looked up, a sighed. “Not funny. We need to take care of Sunny Town, and I doubt we’ll get help by asking. We’ll need to get information.”

Fourth finally calmed down, and sat back up. “What would we need? I’ve got a weapon, you got your… whatever, and we’re both earth ponies. I don’t think magic can help since we can’t use the stuff. What would we need to learn other than how to kill them, and even though they are scary and evil, I can’t just outright kill them. Even if I could… How are we going to beat them?”

The pink mare's question made Mitta facehoof. She rubbed her face a bit, then asked, “What were we thinking? We should just leave before they overrun Ponyville!”

Fourth gave Mitta a disapproving look. “No. My friends live here, and I’m going to protect them, and Apple Bloom.” Mitta gave Fourth a sad frown.

“Look… There’s nothing we can do… I really wish there was…”

But Fourth Wall didn’t cave. “I’m going into that forest tonight whether you're coming or not. I don’t even care if I die in the process. I’m going.”

The two sat in silence. Neither wanted to break it, and Mitta was in turmoil. After ten minutes, she sighed.

“Fine…”

Fourth Wall suddenly smiled, and embraced the grey mare. Mitta was surprised, but didn’t reject. During the hug, Mitta saw Fourth Wall’s mane and tail were as poofy as Three Leaf’s. ‘Does this mare’s mane change between straight and poofy?’

The two finally broke apart, though Fourth was more reluctant.

“I still think it’s a bad idea… But I have nothing to live for anyway, so why not?”

Fourth ignored what Mitta said after the pause. “I think you should check the library and learn about curses. Maybe that’ll help with our resolve!”

Mitta nodded. “And you?”

Fourth Wall gained a sheepish grin. “I kinda want to check the town. I’ll pretend to be Pinkie, and I doubt they’ve been looking for me, so I’ll be fine.”

Mitta didn’t seem to sure about that, but gave in with a nod.

“Later!” Fourth said, hugging Mitta. The hug lasted four-point-two second, before the pink mare disappeared.

Mitta shook her head as she looked around. “I need to figure out that mare...”

Comments ( 43 )

better short than nothing,.... thank you.
However, i think you should have waited to make a longer chapter later, at least this wasn´t rushed.

I understand your reasons, but i prefer to wait longer, for a bigger chapter, than to have a short chapter very fast.

6233877 I realized that I hadn't written in forever, so I made the chapter to say I'm not done. The next part will be a lot longer my friend.:moustache:

6233904 i know otherwise you would not have mentioned it, and i honestly thought you would not even add anything else to this chapter.
Since we got a little bit of the story, well i could somehow say exactly what i said, that it was short.

However, this is not the best time for me to write much, don´t know what the time is where you live right now, but it is pretty late here, and if i am tired, i maybe say stuff i don´t mean that way, so i stop for now, don´t want to sound mean.

Good chapter can't wait for the nex one

When are you doing the next one

RC

6368743 time cheak?

6406556 I'm having problems...

RC

6407970 such as internet or more like editorial?

6408989 Internet... And real life...

RC

6409199 so stress and challenges from your "co workers?"

6409335 Uh... You could say that.

I know you've got a lot on your plate, but Draigo deems them worthy of protection *tosses hourglass and awaits his summoning*

6409390
This has nothing todo with the story and everything to do with your profile picture.
I chose one... basket full of ponies. Put that Aplejack back in there!

Other than that, I'm just awaiting for the next chapter

When is the next chapter

When are you going to do more chapters

He arrived, and bout a knife

He fought a knife? How you do that? And what did that knife do to him?
Questions that remain a mystery...
Da Word is: 'bought'.

while sorting out his feeling towards a curtain cyan Pegasus.

I didn't know Rainbow Dash was made of fabrics used to cover up windows, but it's no wonder considering how she always seems to "hang out" on a cloud.
Da Word is: 'certain'

That said, please clean up your story's summary/introduction, it leaves a bad taste reading errors like those right up front and scares away potential readers.

The cover must be clean and give a sheen after all.

6707757 There's nothing that tells me that. Thank you.

Anyone know about stories like this about alternate personas

6787765 There's a group called Why Am I X. Maybe that?

when I read this my mind goes to fourth hacking and slashing using her knife well the song "gonna go far kid" plays don't know why tho maybe it's because I've been listing to it to much and have been watching a lot of fight scenes

7163878 I saw this:

While she hacked them apart! :pinkiecrazy:

Is this story dead?:fluttercry:

7554612 No, I'm just having trouble coming up with what's next. I need inspiration.

7555234 have you tried brainstorming with a friend? :duck:

7557677 I don't have any friends interested in it...

7559250 I know... I may get back into it next year after I've worked of some other fics.

I would like to have a new chapter please.

7661404 I'm looking for help... :fluttercry: I don't have any ideas how to continue...

7663141 I guess if I have the time I could at least read it and see if I get even the strangest idea, but I can't say when this is going to happen exactly

7663141
Gets caught up in a conversation about why 'Her' and rainbow dash have been leaving were they then get called to 'Fix a problem'

COuld you considering to continue this? It is probably better than most of the stuff I can choose from recently.

8714903
I realized I hadn't any plans for it. I might, but that's a huge if.

8716762
Maybe if you don't get an idea you could just slightly change it from it being an horror/adventure story to something more random?, just in chase you don't know what to do with it anymore.

The only thing I hope for, that "if" you continue, then don't let the main six change his personality or manipulate him for no reason like it happens way to often.
I remember many lone wolfs, that suddenly started to be overly friendly and happy for every visit they got.

8716801
Fourth Wall isn't exactly a lone wolf, he was just hidden for his safety. But he isn't exactly entirely friendly. I enjoy more villainous or anti-hero/villain characters anyways, even if Fourth isn't any of those. Yet.

8716821
Fourth wall was the main char right?; but I only meant that I hope you don't make it look like the main char is forced to change by the others and not because he wants it himself.

9343104
Ouch, that... hurts? :rainbowhuh:

Not sure where you were going there, but I already knew those things. But I've improved, and plan on rebooting the story with improvements. I'm surprised I did that well four years ago, I'd only just learned how to write. If you want to judge me as a writer then check out my newer stuff. I love criticism but this is four years too late. :facehoof: It's just common sense to take a look at more recent things before you call someone a bad writer.

9343104
Y'know, I find it ironic how you call Mr. Parasite here a bad writer, yet you make several grammatical errors.

That's like saying someone is bad at soccer, but you don't know how to kick a ball; it makes your point initially invalid, and shows how unaware of yourself you are.
Now, I'm not saying I'm better at writing than you are, or the story is bad or something, seeing as I haven't read it yet, but I just find the situation funny.

But hey, everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

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