Chapter 1: Well this is great
I wake up one morning. Which I thought would be normal. But apparently things didn't go on like planned. Today was a Tuesday. I am a morning person. I'm kinda use to waking up in the morning. But on school days my mom wakes me up. She shakes me. I open my eyes and look at her. She has a look of disbelief.
"What's wrong?" I said putting a hand to my mouth. What I see is not a hand, but a hoof!?!
My voice. What the heck happened to it. It sounds like a femine voice. A familiar voice. But the big question is, what am I?! I look down at my body and see that it's a cyan color. I get off of my bed to hit the ground.
"Honey?! Is that you?!?" Asked my mom.
"I don't know anymore." I replied.
I try and learn how to walk on four hooves. I try and remember how my cat walks. Right forleg first, then left backleg, then left forleg, then right backleg. Okay. I got it! I start to walk to the bathroom across from my room. I jump up onto the counter. What I see takes my breath away. I see Rainbow Dash. The rainbow colored mane, the rainbow colored tail, the cyan fur, the wings, and the eye color is magenta. I also have a cloud with a rainbow lightning bolt.
Yep I'm Rainbow Dash. I gulp. I lost my manhood. Now I'm a mare. A girl pony. I get off the counter and walk back to my mom. I look at the steps for a moment. How am I going to get down there? I get to my mom and tell her it's me your son, John Robertson?!
She finally snaps back to reality and kneels down and runs her hand through my mane.
"It's okay, everything will be alright." She says to herself trying to calm down.
She picks me up and takes me downstairs. I know I can't eat meat. So I pull the rag around the fridge Handle until it's opened. I get out an apple and eat it. Well I guess no more pills for me. Because we don't know what they would do to a pony from Equestria. So I guess no bookbag either. It would be to heavy to carry. My mom gets on a coat and grabs my bookbag and follows after me. She opens the van door and lets me in. She gives the bookbag to the van driver.
"Okay make sure someone helps him get the bookbag to his room." Said my mom. She told me she loves me and closed the doors.
I try and buckle my self in. It took me a couple of tries but I finally made it in. I had to use my mouth and my hooves. It took a bit but when I got it buckled that was easy. But now getting out is a question. I have my IPad at home and I have nothing to do. So I play with my tail. It was kinda fun. So then I looked out the window. One student got on. Then when the other one got on they looked at me with a suprised look. Well I'm now a female so yeah, that's great.
After we got to school I asked the kid sitting next to me to help me unbuckle my seat belt and they said sure. They unbuckled the seat belt for me and we all got out. The teachers looked at me with shock. They take us upstairs and we enter the second floor. We get our stuff on our hangers and we get sit at our hangers. The other students in my class came over and they looked at me with shock. Some of my friends at school were freaked out but some were happy that there was a pony here.
"Hey guys, it's me, John." I mumbled loud enough so they can hear it.
"John!?! That's you!!!" Said Nick," That's impossible!!! You can't be a pony. A talking pony with wings!?!"
"Hey what could I say the teachers had to help me get my bookbag on the hanger and get my folder out. It's hard carrying it." I said.
Our new teacher get here and let's us in the classroom. Xander looks at me in disbelief that Rainbow Dash is really here.
We get ready for the day and stuff. I get off of my desk and trot around outside of the classroom. I get my hooves on the water fountain and I try my best to get up there. I get up there and I press the button with my hoof. I drink the water.
I get down and go back into the classroom. Which is very close to the water fountain. The water fountain is just outside the classroom. The whistle blows. We head upstairs and start typing. But sadly I can't type because of, well you know hooves. So I just sat on the stool and waited. Then when next period started I used my mouth to wright. Which I know doesn't sound like a good idea. But hey I have no other choice. So after that we go back down at go to science. We wright notes in our notebooks. Then we have homroom. Which I just drew. But I realized that I wouldn't be about to play on my IPad and wright a new chapter for my story The Silence of Middle-Earth. Because the touch screen doesn't work for hooves. Because it's fur. But maybe it could.
So anyways we go to lunch. My friend Miah sits next to me while Shaun sits next to me as well.
"What happened to you?" Asks Miah.
"I don't know, I just woke up as a pony. A girl pony." I replied.
"Well what happened? Wait who are you? What pony are you?" Asked Shaun.
"I'm Rainbow Dash. A mare pony from Equestria." I answered.
After lunch we went to science again, we watched Bill Nye The Science Guy. Then we went to reading. Which I was stared at by that teacher. Then we went to math. Math was our final class. After that we went back to the classroom. Our new teacher had to help me out. We then left and we went home.
Well the first day didn't go so well. Let's home tomorrow is better.
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I've seen a lot of stories come from you,
But this is going to be the SHITTIEST, Most UNORIGINAL, And CLICHED Story.
Get this off my interwebs.
Brutal Honesty, But Don't beat a dead horse.
I'll do a review soon, But i already Know What I'm getting from this.
top rofl, man
Good start.
Needs work though XD
5694237 well I don't care what you say my friend may wright better stories than me but you don't need to be mean to him. You just crossed the line it's my story. You don't to that. I don't let anyone do that to my friends so just leave. Nobody cares for haters like you. So you get off the inter web.
~SkullKing
Great so far. Keep up the good work!
5694358 thank you.
:D
~SkullKing
5694237 hey just to let you know my friend skulking is new to the world of writing, and doesn't know which techniques to use or anything like that. So just go easy on the beginners. People aren't just born with a gift to write amazing stories, it takes a lot of time to develope skills, and the necessary grammar to do as such. Took me two months to gain some skills and now I can write decent stories that a good handful of people will enjoy. Yes I will say the story does need a lot of work, but nobody is a perfect writer. I know you were just the same when you started out.
5694763
"New"
>Has 17 Stories
Top rofl
5694795 11 of which are mine :)
pleeeease continue!
I drew you some fan art
5697951 cool thanks :)
5694763 thanks pal I just wanted to protect you. I will let anyone talk mean about me but not about my friends. :D
You clearly know what you like, but not why you like it. So you write in everything you like from other stories, but it's just parrotting everything without understanding it. A big pile of imitation poorly executed. You don't describe anything. You jump from idea to idea too quickly. You only write about a life like your own, which others can't relate with. Your grammar errors are homophonic, which means you use the wrong words that sound right when spoken, and that means you've been talked to more than you've read anything. You rely on repeated ! and ?s to try to give your words emotional weight, which never works.
It's kind of like that story I wrote in middle school, except I had a slightly more creative fantasy scenario and it was like 3 times longer. (That's not a good thing.)
You also hide behind a joint account instead of making your own account for free, so that people have a harder time identifying you, which is kind of mean.
I like what you like, so I hope you'll help yourself and read more stories, trying to figure out why they're writing what they write, and spend some time thinking to yourself. What you enjoy about what you read, and what you want to see more of.
5698446 hey I'd like to say thanks since you're the first to actually not insult on my friend, but rather encouraged him. Btw he does have his own account. We just share mine. I'm the "vinyl" side of this account.
This is really cool. I love rainbow dash tg/tf fics. Keep it up
yeah this is not really realistic I mean 1 his mom just letting him go school (was she crazy or in shock ) 2 when s/he got on the bus no one freak out
and called the police or something like that or took pictures ( I know this sounds mean to people but when we face the unknown we go bat shit
crazy one person is smart but people in group goes dumb) 3 by the time when s/he got to school the FBI or some like them should have put him in a cage or something 4 the one that turned into Rainbow Dash was to calm about the all if it what about his the future or something
and other things that should have but happened didn't anyway you really need to think about your Characters and how they react to things and im not just saying this to be mean but if you what more people to read this get your shit together and make this better and make sense
6074397 I agree that this doesn't make sense really. This was my friends work. I share or did share my account with another user. He's new to all this writing stuff.
not true.
6295573 I found that out as well
what a sham its only one chapter
I was actually thinking of doing a story like this, but it looks like someone beat me to it. It's good. But why don't the teachers say anything?