Caverns & Cutie Marks

by TheColtTrio

Chapter 88: We’re About to See Some Serious Crap

The mares were watching the battles on the walls from a balcony high up on the castle. The Armoroids had yet to force a breach in the castle but it likely wouldn’t be much longer. “Well it looks like Purple Heart’s back.” Twilight said, gesturing to where his forces were assaulting the wall. Amber tried to contain her sigh of relief at the appearance of the purple earth pony as he stood on the wall. She shook her head, fighting off the tears that tried to fall. He was only returning to save the city. She wouldn’t be hopeful. And yet, she couldn’t help it. She frowned, narrowing her eyes at the wall.

“Are those...rabbits?”

“Hares,” Twilight corrected. “He explicitly said that they’re called hares. For what reason, I’m not sure, but he was pretty specific about it.”

“Why’d he bring rab- hares with him?”

“To help retake the city,” Rarity replied. She looked aside at the Queen. “Did you not receive notification about the situation at Mistakwe?”

Amber nodded. “I did,” she said. “But the report was vague. ‘Hostilities have ceased thanks to threatening from a powerful pony.’ The problem was solved, that much I gathered. I just didn’t know how and between whom the problem was.”

“Purple Heart will be able to explain,” Rainbow Dash piped up. “Seeing as he was the one who got there first.”

“It’s a shame that an entire army stands between us and Fluttershy,” Rarity chimed in, “I can’t imagine it had been easy for the poor dear to go along with Purple Hea-” Her words trailed into a shriek of surprise as two hares landed on the balcony with the four mares followed closely by Fluttershy landing next to them.

“So, this the queen, huh?” one of the hares said, examining Amber. “Thought she’d be a bit taller.”

“Expectations,” the other hare said, waving a paw. “Civilians always think of heroes as larger than life up until you meet them. Remember Purple Bruise talking about Equard Elquine? Larger than life hero, yet he’s the size of a beansprout.” Both hares were garbed in light armor, thin rapiers sheathed at their sides. Both were ignored by the four mares.

“FLUTTERSHY!” Twilight, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash cried together, rushing to embrace the yellow pegasus.

“Oh, it’s so good to see you three again!” Fluttershy wailed, hugging the other three. “How are you holding up? You haven’t been injured, have you? Have you heard anything from Pinkie or Applejack?”

“We’re about as well as one can when in a castle under siege,” Rarity consoled, pulling out of the hug. “None of us have been hurt, thankfully. They haven’t forced a breach yet.” The implications of her words hung in the air for a few moments before Twilight cleared her throat.

“I haven’t heard anything from Pinkie for a bit, nor have I heard from Applejack. Then again, I’ve been a bit too busy to try contacting them,” she explained.

Fluttershy looked down from the balcony at the battle below. “It looks like they’re about even down there,” she muttered, watching the battle between Bael’s legionaries and Discord’s assortment. She frowned. “Do you think we should go help?”

“I’m sure he’s fine,” Rarity said. “After all, darling, it is Discord. I’m sure if he needed help, he’d ask for it.”

“You’re right,” Fluttershy sighed with a nod. “I guess he doesn’t need help.”

* * *

“HELP!” Discord screamed from under a pile of semi-demonic ponies. He flailed his mismatched arms, sending the Traitor Legionaries flying in comedic spirals and distant star-like twinkles. He whirled about, glaring at the the troops behind him. “And where were you?”

Landed Title shot a look at him, fighting off a trio of the Legionaries herself. “I’m a little busy at the moment!” she shouted back.

“Right,” Discord muttered. “Carry on.” He turned back to the battlefield at large, trying to ignore the equally chaotic fighting behind him. Word had arrived that Purple Heart was at the front gates, which was good, but it also meant that he wasn’t here to get beaten up instead of Discord. The forces of his own hastily assembled troops and Bael’s traitors were equal in number, but the daemon’s influence made each one as strong as 5, maybe 10 ponies. In addition, they were better armed, better armored, and better organized.

In other words, Discord needed a miracle. Something difficult to get when he was the highest authority in the cosmos. For a moment, he wondered if there was something else out there that could help him. He sighed, shrugged, and dropped to what he assumed was an appropriate stance, looking up at the sky. “Can I get a little bit of help here?”

Silence filled the battlefield; not exactly silent silence, but the dramatic dampening of sound. The sound of the wind whistling through the battlefield was all that was unaffected by the dramatic sound editing. A surprisingly loud wind, for that matter. Almost like a loud, cyclical wail.

Just in front of him, a faint blue shape began to materialize. It appeared to be the source of the wail, with the sound growing in intensity as it became more opaque. Finally, the shape became fully solid, the wail ending with a thud. Before Discord stood an old-fashioned, blue box, as tall as he was. Across the top of the box read the word “Police.”

Discord blinked. “What.”

The police box door creaked open, revealing a mint-colored pony on the other side. A truncated red cone sat on his head at a jaunty angle, the tassel hanging down in front of his face. “Hello!” the pony said with a grin. “One question: what year is this?”

Discord was, in a word, unamused. “Wits, what are you doing?”

“I’m the Witstor,” Wits End said, perfectly serious.

“I’m not giving you my clothes.” Discord said looking down at the pony. “So what are you doing here?”

“I have a device that goes ding when there’s stuff.” Wits took the fez off his head and tossed it back into the police box. “But seriously, I’m here ‘cause you called for help like a little wimp.” He leaned back behind the door. “Come along, Pinkie Pond!”

Pinkie Pie poked her head out from behind the door. “Oh hey, Discord!” she shouted with a smile. “What’s up?”

Discord blinked at the pink mare and shrugged. “Oh, we’re just retaking a city that’s been conquered by villain ponies I created based off the questionably sane minds of three humans,” he replied nonchalantly. “Up until a few minutes ago, I was being squished by semi-demonic ponies. Other than that, nothing much else is ‘up,’ as you say.”

“The sky is up and so is the sun,” Pinkie said, pointing with a hoof skyward.

Discord blinked again and crossed his arms. “Well, you’re not wrong,” he groused.

“Sounds like you could use some help,” Wits said. “Lucky for you, you’ve got us.”

“Well, that’s something at least,” Discord sighed. He saw the expectant look on Wits End and Pinkie Pie’s faces. “What?”

“Say the thing,” Wits said.

“What thing?” Discord asked.

“The thing,” Pinkie repeated. “You know. ‘You and’...”

Discord sighed. “You and what army.”

The two ponies stepped out of the way of the blue box’s doorway, motioning for Discord to do the same. Wits knocked on the side of the box. “This army!”

The first one to exit the blue box was clad in heavy armor, calmly stepping out with a greatshield engraved with a dragon’s head. With one swing, the alicorn send a legionnaire flying backwards into the fray. More and more armored alicorns exited the box, forming a perimeter around them, shields facing outward and pushing the demonic ponies back.

The second wave shot out in a wave, taking to the skies with light armor and heavy lances. They flew in formation, cutting swaths through the battlefield.

Wits End raised his eyebrows repeatedly at the Draconequus. “Eh? Ehh?”

Discord watched the seemingly endless stream of battle-ready alicorns. “How-”

“It’s a portal back to the Alicorn sanctuary!” Pinkie explained. “Minty got his marefriends Salad Eater and Pickled Umbra to help us out!”

“Are you even trying anymore?” Wits asked the mare.

“It’s been a long day.”

Discord stared down at the stallion. “And what exactly did you have to do to get that help?”

Wits glanced off to one side. “So, you might not be very happy about that.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because it involves us,” Sol Eater purred, stepping out of the police box.

Discord’s eyes widened slightly. “You made a deal with literally the last villain you fought? I thought you were the one to call that sort of stuff out!”

“Oh, that’s not the bad part yet,” Wits said.

“IT GETS WORSE?”

“Verily.” Penumbra stepped out behind her sister, clad in dyed silks and leathers. A long, thin blade was strapped to her side. “As Strategos End hath said, thou art attached to another object via an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis.”

The look Discord shot at Wits End, if the Draconequus was at full power, would have required the mint-colored colt to roll a new character. “Why.”

Wits grinned. “Basically, run.”

* * *

“Well, it looks like Discord might be regretting a few choices in world creation,” Rainbow Dash chortled between snickers as she caught sight of the new army.

“I just hope they’re going to get here quick,” Twilight said, looking over the balcony towards the source of the loud banging noises “It sounds like the Armoroids are redoubling their efforts and I think I see Just Duty down there.”

From behind Twilight, Rainbow made a victorious hoofpump at the usage of ‘Armoroids’. Rarity and Amber Glitter rolled their eyes and sighed, looking back to Twilight

“Don’t think you’ve won yet, Rainbow,” Twilight warned. “You and I are going to have a serious etymological and linguistic discussion of a proper name for the armoroids later. But for now, we have more important battles.” A deep boom that the mares felt as much as they heard punctuated her point.

“Speaking of which, perhaps we should head back inside and get ready to fight,” Rarity suggested.

“Yes, it doesn’t seem like any of the armies are going to get here in time to stop the… armoroids,” Amber said, gazing at the battles on the walls.

“I’d say we hold out for Purple Heart,” Fluttershy suggested, “but he’s facing his archenemy now. He might take a while.” The mares and the two hares guarding the stairs leading up from the castle proper all turned northward to consider the gate guarded by Bael and under siege by Purple Heart. The Purple Barbarian’s combined force of Hares and Loyal Legionnaires had breached the portcullis and were engaging Bael’s Traitor Legion and the outlying Armoroids from Holdfast’s host. It appeared that the fighting was evenly matched, more so than it was up at the castle. The Hares were primarily melee fighters and their powerful kicks and jabs were extremely effective against the plate armor of the Armoroids. The Legionnaires of Purple Heart were a true compliment to the Hares, as they took over the task of dealing with the Traitor Legion.

Amber Glitter frowned. “That seems cruel,” she mused. The other mares blinked and looked at her in confusion, questioning looks on their faces as they awaited an explanation.

“I’m not certain if it was Bael’s doing, Purple Heart’s intention, or mere coincidence that the Legionnaires fight with each other,” Amber explained. “Up until a while ago, from what my messengers tell me, the Legion was once whole and existed under one leader. Now, they are split, fighting for their leaders’ respective goals, killing friends and comrades who they once fought beside. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were crying as they fight.”

The mares looked amongst each other thoughts of how’d they react if they’d had to fight each other running through their heads. Tears started to form and each one of them looked like they wanted to say something, but were failing to find any words. Twilight squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep but shaky breath in and slowly let it out. “We need to go get ready to hold the Armoroids back while we wait for reinforcements to get to us,” she decided resolutely, forcing any sorrowful thoughts out of her head. The others nodded and followed along quietly, all focusing on the task at hoof and feeling relieved that they’d be fighting beside their friends and not against.

* * *

“Enough waiting,” Holdfast grumbled. The gate was taking damage, but far too slowly; especially with word that the legendary Alicorns had returned. He motioned to one of the larger suits of armor. “Take it down.”

The armor stood at attention, faint black powder trickling from its joints. It marched forward, other suits of armor pulling away from the gate as it approached. With a grin, Holdfast watched as another suit retrieved a torch from a wall sconce. The powder that filled the large suit was an import—ironically enough—from Ghuilder, and would make short work of the structure.
Without a moment of hesitation, the torch-bearing suit of armor charged the gate, striking the powder-filled suit with the firebrand. For a moment, the world seemed to be made entirely of light and fire, with a roar like that of an enraged dragon. When the flames faded, a massive hole stood where a gate once was.

“Should have done that from the start,” Holdfast mused. “Good to know.” He waved a forehoof to the suits of armor around him. “Well? Take the castle.”

“That will not be easy now.” Just Duty said. “They’ve had more than enough time to prepare. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve gone and been stripping wood paneling from walls to reinforce barricades and tearing stone and brick from non-essential walls. It’s what I’d be doing.”

“I would expect nothing less,” Holdfast replied. He looked back at Just Duty with a wry smile. “But I know the procedure the guards have been trained to follow in case of a siege. They’ll attempt defence in depth, holding on to guard posts throughout the city. The castle itself is relatively unguarded, since ideally, soldiers would fall back to is as the outer wall fell.” His smile widened. “So it would certainly be a shame if somepony attacked the wall and the castle at the same time, wouldn’t it?”

“Yes, but I am worried about how much of a corner we have backed them into. With nowhere to flee to when they break, they are going to fight like never before. With them having everything to lose and everything to gain, I’d feel more comfortable if we more heavily outnumbered them.” The ex-paladin paused to think. “Or if we had another heavy hitter on our side. Your armors are decent soldiers but lack ingenuity and finesse, or the sheer strength to just power through, as the gate just proved to us. I’d feel better if Bael was here to assist me in leading the fight; he’s strong enough to be trouble and, while I doubt he lacks deep tactical knowledge, he knows how to handle a fight.”

Holdfast frowned. As much as he hated to admit it, Just Duty made sense. The suits of armor were strong, but they hadn’t had a real fight thanks to most of the guards defending the wall from Bael and the Traitor Legionaries. Inside that castle they would be ready. “Very well,” he said. “I’ll defer to your judgement in this matter of war.” The snow-white stallion turned to one of the suits of armor, who had been cleaning up scraps of metal from the powder-filled suit. “Send a signal to the daemon. We’ll crush the enemy here, and clean up the wall later.”

The suit tilted its helmet slightly in apparent confusion. Holdfast sighed. “Just set something on fire. I’m sure the beast will get the message.” He turned to Just Duty again as the suit of armor galloped off. “I will say, you’re right about their lack of ingenuity.”

* * *

Purple Heart and Bael stood there, looking pensively at each other. Legionnaires clashed with Legionnaires below them while Hares hammered away at the armor suits, fighting to gain at least some modicum of ground. But they were at a stand still. Both armies were stuck in the gatehouse, neither giving an inch, nor advancing one.

“This stalemate won’t last forever. Eventually, one of our armies will fail.” Bael punctuated the statement with a lunge at Purple Heart, initiating combat. The Purple Barbarian leapt sideways to avoid the attack, skirting around the grey being to flank him. With a grunt of exertion, Purple Heart swung his own attack at Bael, aiming for the creature’s midriff. Bael snapped around and blocked the strike with crossed forearms. However, there was such power in the punch that he slid backwards on impact, skidding across the wall top. He dug his clawed toes into the stone of the wall and stopped his backward motion after he’d gone twenty paces.

Purple Heart clicked his teeth in irritation when he saw Bael’s smug grin. “Am I strong enough for you yet?” the purple earth pony hissed. “Have I come far enough to make a challenge for you?”

Bael chuckled, dropping his arms as he straightened, looking at his adversary with poisonous green eyes. “Oh, yes,” he chortled. “I can fully enjoy our fight now. No god-being dictating who wins or loses, no outside forces, just the two of us.” Grin still on his face, Bael settled into a forward leaning posture, head and chest out towards Purple Heart. His long fingers braced against the stone of the wall top, supporting his sprinter start posture.

Purple Heart cracked his neck and rolled the kinks from his shoulders and back before settling into a similar ready stance. He narrowed his eyes at the crouched grey figure, preparing for the coming fight.

The two tensed, ready to begin.

“Lord Bael! Lord Bael!” a pegasus Traitor Legionnaire called from above, landing on the wall..

The tension on the wall evaporated as Bael hung his head in annoyance and Purple Heart groaned.

Bael looked skyward and sighed. “Ye carping heck,” he whispered. “Something save me from interrupting pansies. Sorry.” He apologized to Purple Heart.

“It happens,” Purple Heart shrugged.

“What?!” Bael snapped, looking at the pegasus.

“The beacons are lit!” the Traitor Legionnaire gasped, pointing to the castle where pyres blazed on the ramparts. “Holdfast calls for aid!”

Bael rolled his eyes and huffed irritably. “Well, guess I’ll have to answer,” he grumbled in an extremely put upon tone. He stood from his crouched stance to walk over to the pegasus. “Looks like we’ll continue this at the castle.”

Purple Heart straightened and nodded. “See you there,” he said. Bael and the pegasus departed, one leaping over rooftops, the other flapping panically behind. The Traitor Legion broke in the gatehouse, fleeing over the supporting armor suits.

“We have the gatehouse, lads!” a Hare cheered. “On to the castle!” A roar of victory boomed as Purple Heart sat on his haunches, looking at the bouncing grey dot.

“Well,” he sighed, “that was underwhelming.”

Author's Note:

Authors: Purple Heart, Wits End, Light Patch

Comments

[Mix-up]

It's was great to see the colt back in action again.