WolfeFang, Rainbow Dash's estranged older brother is hot on the trail of the Reaper along side Alomond 'Al' Pie. Will they catch him? And what dark seceret does Wolfe hold...Several OCs. Rated for language.
Chapters (4)
wolfefang
Joined 18th Dec, 2014 ·
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OH BOY, LOOK EVERYONE, HE IS DELETING COMMENTS! POINT AT HIM AND LAUGH!
The edginess from this story pierced my soul.
Da fuck?
More than two OCs in a story is a crime against equinity and needs to be brought to justice, swift and without mercy.
5398089
There are exceptions when we're talking about veteran fiction writers who have experience and prior work proving they can do this sort of thing right.
That said, this writer is not of that cloth or else one of the OC's names wouldn't be WolfeFang, let alone a sibling of dear old Miss Dash (Who has a tendency to attract these sort of figures it would seem.)
The suffix that means "city" is spelled "-polis", as in metropolis, necropolis, and Acropolis.
1100 hours isn't at night, it's an hour before noon. If you want 11 PM, that's 2300 hours. Do your research.
Also, you should spell it consistently. Where did that extra letter come from?
One, when someone is addressed directly in dialogue, there needs to be a comma in between their name and the rest of the dialogue. For another, don't capitalize "Partner" unless that's his actual name.
It's spelled "fifteen". Also, how incompetent are these cops if the killer has been able to carry on for a decade and a half at a rate of twenty victims or more a year?
Needlessly edgy.
I don't care what you've seen in anime and videogames; scythes are agricultural tools, not weapons. They're very poorly suited for combat.
Okay, I take it back -- the black coat was just dumb. This, though... this is seriously, unnecessarily edgy. (Not to mention an indication that your protagonist is probably overpowered.) And I'll be pleasantly surprised if it gets explained any time soon.
I don't know what's worse: the fact that your OC name and your user name are the same (making this a self-insert), or the fact that this doesn't sound like any name that a pony would have in a million years.
Either split that into two words or put the H into lower case -- don't capitalize in the middle of a name. Also, your character is named after a terrible cartoon.
No
Solid downvote bar? Several OCs? C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!!!!!!files.sharenator.com/combo_breaker_2-s512x533-104272.jpg
5397601 Just so you know Pilgrim, I haven't deleted any posts. Unlike some I don't care what negative things you have to say. If anything I get a kick out of your cowardice. I am willing to bet none of you people, and I use that word loosely, would have the balls to say anything to mine or anyone else's faces that you have insulted. On a positive note, Elric thank you for pointing out my grammar/spelling mistakes. That was very kind of you. As for the rest of you since no one else will say it, I will; ALL of you are massive wastes of space and PRIME examples of what a worthless excuse for a HUMAN being is. Except for you bestrfcplayer, I'm still on the fence about you. Don't if I should be insulted or not. Now I'll wrap this up in a pleasant and respectable way by saying Merry Christmas to you all and may the Goddess have pity on your pathetic existences.
Respectfully
WolfeFang aka DT Sallee
5411605 Even your insults are poorly written.
5426280 Who said I was insulting anyone. I find it to be beneath me. I spoke the truth.
"NEEDLESSLY EDGY ORIGINAL CHARACTER, DON'T STEAL" alert.
Aaaand deleted in 3...2...1...
5426772 unfounded accusations of cowardice, being wastes of space and other mean comments are very insulting.
I think you're mad because people don't like your story, you lash out and then act as if such childish behavior is "beneath you" in a sad attempt to dodge the very valid criticisms of your fic.
Is this really the best you can do?
5429424 I have no issue with criticism. It's when people go above the norm to degrade an individual's work that I have a problem. Last I checked writing a fanfic was something meant to be fun. So what if it's poorly written or has grammatical errors out the wazoo, as long as the writer enjoyed it what's it matter. And if there were some people that read and enjoyed it then that's a plus. Why do people insist on speaking down on something someone put hours or even weeks of their time into to make. For someone to go and judge another's work so critically is unneeded. If you don't like it then fine. You don't need to go out of your way to trample a person self worth. It's sad really, so many writers give up on writing because of excessively harsh critics. Writers that have great potential. I don't write often so my abilities are unhoned. I know this and I'll still post the few stories I've written. Because I'm sure someone somewhere will enjoy it and that's all I care about. Perhaps I was harsher then needed in my previous comment. I had been having a bad day and took it out on everyone that commented on my story. But I do not see why they decided they needed to comment. If they didn't like it then fine. There's a button for that. If they had constructive criticism, great. Otherwise keep it to yourself. Don't hide behind the protection of the internet and trash someone's work. Whether it be fanart, fanfiction, or any other form of expression for a fandom. It's not needed. It just isn't cool man. In truth it is just another form of bullying and I hate bullies.
5411605 I have no qualms telling someone to their face if their story is bad. Even if they're close friends. Sitting right next to me, in my backyard, telling crappy ghost stories over a s'more fire.
Hell, my lack of knowledge of or respect for you makes me MORE liable to do it to you.
5438151 That's great for you. But be honest how many people really have the spine to be so up front? They fear what may happen if they speak that way to another's face and you can't deny that to be true. I have more respect for those that speak honest and helpful criticism then those that just put down someone's work. My major issue is no one takes fanfics for what they are, a fan's work on fiction. Nothing more. Something meant to be enjoyed either by the writer themselves by writing it or by those that read it. If people like it that's great, if not oh well. That's life. It shouldn't matter if the story is poorly written as long as it was enjoyed somehow. If it's read just for laughs that's fine, just keep it to yourself. If you honestly ant to give someone constructive criticism then do so but don't be an arse about it. Does that make any sort of sense to you? If not then there's nothing more I can say to any of you.
5439126
Fixed that for you.
If the only purpose of the story is your own gratification, that leads to the question of why you bother sharing it in a public place to people that won't be likely to receive it as well as you did writing it. I've seen a million excuses applied by authors to the quality of their stories, and most of them are only made as a flimsy shield against valid criticism and a hollow alibi for not making the effort to go back and make it readable.
The moment your story gets published, it's not just about YOU anymore.
5439254 HAHAHAHAHA! Now that's how you make a point. So few people have the ability to make a point like that. I am not above admitting when I've been beat. Kudos to you. I still stand by what I said but I will admit that you have made your point.
5440784 At least you're mostly civil about this. Just yesterday I spent a good half-hour on another author who just threw a tantrum and called me a gay atheist (which pissed me off as an ally AND an atheist). Weirdly enough, the exchange I had with him is some of the only comments he DIDN'T delete on his story, which further strengthened my belief that he was trolling.
Elric, at the very least, made a few points about the failings of your story. Blunt and laced with sarcasm, but it doesn't mean they aren't valid. If you come away with anything from this, let it be some means to improve a broken work.
5441702 As I said in an earlier comment Elric was the only one with valid criticism. And I appreciate it, sarcastic or not. As long as it is valid.
5430222
ALL of you are massive wastes of space and PRIME examples of what a worthless excuse for a HUMAN being is
That's a quote from you.
I'm simply trying to point out your attitude. It seems quite hypocritical.
Honestly, I think you have an imagination that could produce something good. But don't shy away from citics or indulge trolling attempts. People are going to try and get your goat or even just rip on your story for no reason.
In this case the people who say your fic is bad are right, your skills are very rough but it takes time to refine your writing. No matter what you write people will try and give you shit for it, but it comes with putting out something in public.
By embracing all commenters you'll learn to separate the constructive criticism from mean comments. Then you can take another look at your work and why it is bad and how to improve.
Tl;dr don't skip what I wrote. There's constructive criticism in there.