• Member Since 19th May, 2013
  • offline last seen Sep 14th, 2017

Darkryt Orbinautz


Still slowly trying to disentangle from MLP. It is ... slow going.

T
Source

They came down from the stars in boats made of iron and steel. They descended onto the planet and freed it from the greed and tyranny of its reagent.

The ponies called them heroes. They call themselves Decepticons.

But whatever they are, they've done their best to improve life for the people of Equestria. To bring them out of poverty and slavery, to bring them out of fear and despair. When Queen Celestia returns, she can't abide, so she decides it's time to remind the ponies of the status quo ... whatever it takes, even if it means terminating the Decepticon leader.



Note: Takes places in the Transformers "Shattered Glass" universe.

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 26 )

i'm guessing this is from the 'Shattered Glass' continuity?

FINALLY!!! A SHATTERED GLASS STORY!!!

The Good::twilightsmile:

They descended from the stars. Giants forged of steel and copper. For transport, they rode atop giant, thundering discs or on spurts of fire. For weapons, they used beams of light or eyeless dragons nailed to their arms. Some of them stood on their fellows' shoulders. Others transforme themselves as monstrous beasts with swords for nails or vast birds of prey …
And they floated down from the stars … and they saved us from tyranny and greed … and they will protect us from the cruelty of others as well.

Always a fan on Comic Book style narration. I think you misspelled Transform though.

"SUPERION … SMASH."

Ya know what's better than one giant robot? Two giant robots that are also one even more giant robot.

"I've always wanted to say that!"

Everyone who isn’t left handed has wanted to say that. And hooray for Rumbler!

Couldn’t find just one quote to use here, so I'll just say that I really like the way you write Twilights villain diologue.

The Bad::twilightangry2:

"Heh. You know, now I think about it, this might make a good place for an -"
Megatron was interrupted by a laser blast striking him in the dead-center of his back, knocking him down.
"An ambush?"

Hurray for tactical expert Megaton. A round of applause, everyone.

"Uh ..." Cheerilee lost her voice. "Vell, you see … it's good for the children. It toughens them up."

...I see what you’re trying to do with Cheerilee, but as the sun of teacher, I have to call it. No preschool teacher would ever act like that.
And, while I like Megatron helping his friend, I'm not sure that this was the smartest route.

Just one last thing: You already have a ton of characters here. Your other story got bogged down with too many people and lost track of most of them. Try and keep the cast smaller.

Ah yes I remember reading your last SG fic way back when.

The Good::twilightsmile:
Starscream is useful!
I really liked Megatron. He kinda remeinds me of Animated!Prime.
EvilTwilgiht is an amazing villain, as always.
Sideswipe and Cliffjumper have good chemistry.
Rodimus is decent at leading.
Terrific fight.
Chrysalis is fantastic here.

The Bad: :twilightangry2:
A few descriptions felt a bit beige, mainly in the beginning.

He dropped to his knees. Starscream and Soundwave rushed to his side.

Megatron's indecision over the Stunticon's wasn't necessary, seeing as it had such an easy fix.

We are pleased with this offering. We will not kill you... For now.

FINALLY! I'm sorry this has taken so long.

Celestia, curious about the origins of the behemoth before, gave a quizzical tilt of the head. Her reflection in the giant's visor matched her expression. "What are you, my friend?"
This seemed to spark a reaction from the giant. The soldiers gasped and ducked for cover when an arc of electricity traveled across the giant's visor. Celestia flexed her wings and jumped backwards to avoid electrocution, using her wings to glide. All with the calm and grace of a beautiful swan.

Barely started and I already like Evilestia.

Unbeknownst to him, Celestia was drooling because she was imagining having an army of these Autobots titans under her command. Why, with such power, overwhelming Tirek's forces would prove child's play, and she would have legion of iron enforcers to see to it her own iron will would be done.

It's a bit odd of a reaction from a smug snake like Evilestia.

“Good point.” Cliffjumper began to fiddle with a knob on the radar. “I hadn't thought of that since, with Menasor around, I figured we would've caught Superion on the first try. I'll see about making some adjustments ...” Cliffjumper walked off, oblivious to Motormaster's wincing.

Good job, Cliffjumper.

“Oh, I miss collecting taxes.” Cadenza moaned. “The look of horror on those peasants' faces when they learned the tax rate had been upped again … the screams as those who couldn't pay were arrested and sent to the dungeon … oh, I miss it all so much!” Cadence placed a hoof to her head and made as if she was going to faint. “Those stupid Decepticons ruined everything.” Cadence pounded a hoof against the rock.

“I'm torn.” Twilight Sparkle glared at him. “Part of me wants to hug you and kiss you both. Part of me wants to wants to tear your heart out … but another part of me wants to chop you up with a chainsaw.”

You have the best villains.

Celestia rolled her eyes. “Only after you tried to betray and usurp me. Or have you conveniently forgotten those key details?”

Semantics. You're too thin skinned.

Megatron examined the force field for a moment. “From a strictly aesthetic view, yes. The transparency combined with the soft pink colors makes for a pleasing visual. But … will it hold?”

Of course it will. Since when do giant force fields made to keep out giant robots fail in modern fiction?

The force field began to crack. The cracks spread further and further, traveling all around the force field before the force field shattered into a thousand fragments, which faded away into non-existence as they fell towards the ground.

...Now that I'm thinking about it... do force fields ever work?

“Celestia!” The stallion answered. “Queen Celestia! She's back from her mission of conquest, and now she's returned to Canterlot! We're doomed! DOOMED, I TELL YOU! And after your Decepticons were making our lives so much easier ...” The stallion covered his face as he broke into tears.

He handles shock well.

“I mean, no, things will not be going back to the way they were!” Fancy Pants insisted. “As much as it might pain to me to admit, the Decepticons have done some good work here. They've improved our quality of life here, in that now we can LIVE instead of just 'surviving'! We no longer have to worry about if we'll make enough to feed our children hay. We don't have to look over our shoulders at every corner for fear a Royal Guard will arrest us for some minor offense! And to toss all that aside, simply because you say so, well … to me, that would seem to be the epitome of cowardice!”

Well, those are some impressively brave hidden depth's.

“A duel. One on one, between you and I.” Megatron explained. “If I win, you have to leave Canterlot and deactivate all of the Autobots … including Rodimus and the Aerialbots.”
“And if I win?”
“You don't have to do anything. I'll gather up my Decepticons and together, we'll leave Canterlot and exile ourselves into the wilderness.”

Oooo, classic!

As it turned, Megatron may have been the one in a false sense of security the whole time. Before his fist connected with any part of Celestia's body, Celestia held her hoof out and caught it, not only blocking his punch and stopping the momentum Megatron gathered, but injuring his hand as well.

...this is gonna be one of those episodes, isn't it?:twilightoops:

Letting out a pitiful groan, Megatron's engines shut off and he fell to earth. Megatron's body hit the side of the mountain and tumbled down. On his way down, he would occasionally hit a jagged rock, which shredded his already damaged body even further. Sprockets, gears, and springs bled out from Megatron's wounds as his battered body was beaten by the rocks until he landed at the base of the mountain.

Yep, its definitely time for new toys in Hasbro land.

Ultimately, this is fantastic. Emotional in the rights parts, and the pacing was solid. On the other hand, it was a bit cliched in places. Great job.

“Oh, don't get your turbines in a twist.” Chrysalis crawled into the driver's seat. Once all the Changelings were in, Cliffjumper slammed his doors and revved his engine.
“Ooh nooo!” The pony exclaimed, realizing he was never going to catch up to the Decepticon car once it took off. “Now I will have to bake more bread!”
“Hey!” Chrysalis shouted through Cliffjumper's lowered car window. “At least you can bake more bread! The pones in Canterlot can't even manage that!”
The baker pony gave them an odd look. “I don't understand. If you just wanted bread for the Canterlot ponies, why wouldn't you just pay for it? I'd be happy to make you a sale!”
“Because!” Chrysalis shouted back. “Do you know what Celestia would do to you if she found out you were collaborating with the Decepticons? She'd probably separate your head from your neck or something! This way, when we steal it and she finds out, all she can be mad about is that you couldn't stop a theft, rather than being mad about you working with those she's dubbed 'criminals!' We're stealing this bread from the rich (or at least the financially stable) to give to the poor!”

How slowly are they driving away?

“Burn it.” Celestia said. The Autobot began to move. “But only half of it. Divvy it up into two piles and burn one. I want these ponies to understand they live as I see fit, so to express a small shred of mercy would do that quite effectively.”

Cliche evil, but pragmatic and not illogical. Have I mentioned Evilestia is a great villain today? It needs to be a once a day thing.

It was obvious to everyone Starscream was frustrated, even without him swinging his arms around and throwing his fists aimlessly through the air.

That was a really weird description.

“Mm-hmm.” Twilight nodded, continuing to enjoy their tender nuzzling. “ … you know one of these days, we're going to repeat nuzzling each other like this and it's going to end with one of us taking a knife to the other?”
“Oh, yes, I'm aware. But until that day, I intend to enjoy it while it lasts.” Celestia lifted her head and cast her eyes on Twilight's desk. “Why don't you show me what you've been working on?”

That was adorable. This whole scene was fantastic.

“It makes no logical sense.” Rainbow Dash said. “”Twilight Sparkle has faith in you” is not valid criteria to give us the job of removing the Decepticon population from Ponyville. How are a statistical analyst like myself, a daredevil pegasus, a dietitian, a unicorn who enjoys anything to do with mud, and an Earth pony who hates anything to do with mud, possibly qualified to deal with giant alien robots equipped with advanced technology?”

Not a big fan of the Mane Six's alternate personalities; unlike Evilestia and Evilight, they aren't evil version of our beloved ponies, their just reveres ed versions of our beloved ponies.

“Yep!” Fluttershy said. “See, we know you've been hanging around Ponyville and stealing things, so Twilight Sparkle used her magic to put this force field up which will let us in … but keep you out.”
“Is that so?” Starscream asked.
Starscream held his arms out, readying the blasters mounted to the side of said arms. He unleashed a furious barrage of laser fire on the force field, pelting it with energy bullets. It had no effect, failing to damage or weaken the integrity of the force field in any way.
Fluttershy laughed at Starscream. “Too bad. So sad.”

"And now, we will let you get away, instead of trying to catch as is our job! It's a nuanced plan, but give it time."

“I want to help you.” Sideways said, holding his hands out in an open, welcoming gesture. “I know you're trying to fight Celestia and the Autobots. I can help you with that. You just need to agree to a few terms and conditions, including licensing fees, and I can give you everything you ever dreamed of. I can make you a capable leader. I can make it so Megatron would look down on you and be proud of what you've accomplished. I can give you victory over the Autobots. Your name will be written in Cybertronian history – no! Cybertronian legend!” Sideways walked up to Starscream. “All you have to do is shake my hand.” He presented Starscream with a hand.

And then Starscream proves to be competent. I really liked how far you pushed Starscream this chapter, you had me going there.

This is golden!

You're totally gettin' good at writing this fic.

The Transformer-pony interactions are the very best thing about this story you're writing, my friend.

Stuff's gettin' real. ;)

Sideways walked up to Starscream. “All you have to do is shake my hand.” He presented Starscream with a hand.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aggjIMqaRn4

I'm enjoying this fic more and more. :)

6841544

Not gonna lie;

I was expecting that to lead to Doctor Facilier's Friends From The Other Side from The Princess and the Frog.

In fact ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZAY-78zhmw

*watches your link*

:twilightoops: :raritystarry:I didn't know someone had made a male cover to that song!

I like this one. The brief history lesson on the Cyber Planet Keys is my favorite part.

Bravo on yet another great chapter! The characters are so epicly realized!

You write warfare so good. And once again, you nail the Transformer-pony dynamic.

You've ended this story with a literal bang. You've got a talent for storytelling. :)

What a ending! :pinkiehappy: I love it!

Anyone noticed the Star Wars Episode 2 reference in the end? I did :pinkiesmile:

Love it.

Absolutely love it.

Okay so last chapter Megs got offlined so how long till Galavtron pops up?

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