"Cakevorce, Cakeswinging, Cakedultery, Cakeold and other similar complete garbage"

Hey now! You're talking about something I love.

Seriously though, this looks like a great story! I can't wait to read it!

4353248

I am so opposed to even consensual, non-pressured swinging that I bring popcorn, soda and a giant foam finger for that swinger episode of CSI. It's a personal and emotional thing. And since I love the Cakes so much I feel it even more strongly. Honestly, that story and the humiliation of 120 Days made me feel exceptionally uncomfortable about working with you. But then, I pushed through. You're just positing silly sex situations. "What if the Cakes were horrible ponies who didn't actually love one another enough to honor a legal union?" So I learned to float on.

I hope you like it. It was me, as I said, writing a love letter to the Cakes.

Unf, dat married sex.

Fuck it must be lonely up there on that pedestal. :(

FINALLY!
I thought the whole fandom was going mad with 'Cakes not the correct pair for the babies.'
It was fueled thanks to the explanation on how far the child related to them based on Pony-type.

Cakevorce, Cakeswinging, Cakedultery, Cakeold and other similar complete garbage

I have multiple problems with this sentence, but it would be unwise to judge a story based upon it's description or it's author's opinions on what exactly quanitifies and qualifies love. I'll give it a Read Later if only because I'm very interested to see how this plays out.

"What if the Cakes were horrible ponies who didn't actually love one another enough to honor a legal union?"

I also have a major problem with this sentence, that insinuates swingers are horrible people who don't love each other ever and that legal unions are permanent binds that prevent you from legally having sex with anyone else ever despite compelling evidence that suggests humans aren't particularily monogamous or polygamous. Again, I won't judge a story based upon it's author or it's content because that's childish.

I by no means intend to rile you up or change your views with a comment on your story. I just felt that you came off pretty strong and it bothered me a bit and compelled me to share and support my own viewpoint because I'm a dick and how could u hurt muh hedcannon. Again, I have yet to read the fic, though I'm familiar with your work and if I recall correctly it was pretty good.

Anyways, added to Read Later because interesting Take That to major headcanons MUH HEDCANNON. I'll see what you've got when I get home.

Not rally my Ship, but your gettin' a thumbs up from me for the sake of keepin' it real, and not making them a broken family for once.

4353546

I've loved the Cakes from the start. I admit, some is because Cup just looks so cute and Carrot is a pefect match. But just having this lovely married couple be a lovely married couple is my main drive.

4353364

It can be just as kinky, varied and passionate as other kinds.

4353555

I've grown from casual indifference to genuine rage because of how all-pervasive (to the point of ubiquity) it has become. It's like it has become WRONG for the Cakes to be happy. It's like how I used to think Gayburn was slightly funny and now want the ability to punch people over TCP/IP when they bust out another "O-ho-ho-ho, gay Braeburn is a total coc-slut."

I u derstand there are other ways. It's a personal feeling. But given how the Cakes seem and how their family unit seems strong... it just seems (to me) they'd have to be terrible ponies to just swing around.

So... I take it you write extensively on Cakevorce? Or similar? (I actually do have a positive poly story. A couple. Raridogs in "Iron Will vs. The Penile Code" and in a chapter of my Interspecies request series; and a buffalo/griffn/pony trio in that same series.)

4353926

It's my thing. I love the two of them and like their happy family.

4354117 Well it has my Support, even tho it does not intrigue me that much as a ship, simply because it's sweet.

4354105

No, but my headcanon is that the Cakes are swingers. And the swinging lifestyle, as far as I'm aware of, doesn't preclude strong parenting or strong family units. As far as I'm aware, a successful pair of swingers are just as if not more loving and affectionate to their spouse as they are to their partners. I'll have to ask a swinging friend or two, but I don't recall it being detrimental to the kids. It's not like they're involved in the sex or anything which is another fetish of mine

But we could debate/argue all day and go absolutely nowhere. let's talk about your story.

I felt that the frosting bit was the strongest part of the piece. Hands down. Really kinky, really well portrayed, and really ties into the characters of the Cakes. I would have liked a bit more sensory stuff throughout besides touch and sight, and a bit more focus on more smells and more sounds. You mentioned the scent offhandly a few times but it wasn't significant. That's a minor nitpick, though, and overall that was a really neat scene.

I don't get the pornography angle, though, because it feels like it cheapens the whole piece. It makes the Cake's interactions feel ever so slightly artificial and fake. I know they're amateurs, but it still doesn't feel as genuine as it should. It doesn't preclude the message that they're happily married but it cheapens it significantly.

I think a better angle would be a more animalistic approach. Mrs. Cake can't keep her hooves off of Mister Cake, and as soon as shop closes she pretty much pounces him. They find they've left the icing out while passionately making out in the kitchen, they put two and two together, and they "try something new". No cameras, no contrivances. It would feel more natural and help the point that they love each other deeply as much as the pornography angle hurts it.

Pinkie Pie popping up out of nowhere? Definitely the weakest part. It distracts from the main purpose of the piece for literally no reason and the reaction the two have to it is weak at best. I don't know what compelled you to plug your OTP into the fic, but if you were going to do it, there are better ways that don't jaggedly interrupt the flow of the action. Perhaps Pinkie and Twilight are chatting outside the kitchen while Mrs. Cake jumps Mr. Cake's bones? As is, it's a huge blow to the rest of the fic and the focus on the Cakes. We don't learn anything from it besides stuff that we don't need to know to enjoy the piece, so why bother having it in there?

But long winded and pretentious me digresses endlessly. This is still a fairly strong fic and I like it a bunch. In short, I recommend practice writing more stuff with the other senses and try to keep things natural and flowing. A good pre-reader can definitely help with the latter, pointing out when something seems to sort of interrupt what's going on in a negative way. I hope my needlessly big, long comment doesn't leave you with the impression I didn't like it since I spent longer on the negatives than the positives, but I really did like it. It's 5k worth of Mrs. Cake butt. You don't see that every day, and you certainly don't see it well written every day.

What's this, a story that accurately depicts the cake's marriage?

You sir, you have yourself a follower.

4354316

Pretty much everything this guy said. He covered everything I would have said.

With regard to the fic at least. My opinions on married sex and swinging are irrelevant and we're all entitled to our own views.

Good show despite the flaws. Looking forward to more stories from you.

--CG

(PS: infant twins and a kinky fic with a scene with tit sucking, but no milk? Wut? XD)

4354316

I've found that sometimes spending a long time on the negatives with a positive intent is a good thing, it means you care a lot.

There was really a lot going on with this, which could have been parsed out to other stories. One is the idea that Equestria has porn that is basically happily married couples with active and involved love lives. The other was Pinkie... being Pinkie. It would be contrived to have her be otherwise. She will literally pop up in the middle of things because that's her. It was also another facet of the normalized porn, like Luna's offhanded comment about the legitimacy of prostitution in "Dames of the Tea Table 6." I'm building a world here and that takes a lot of elements to make certain some facets are clear.

Sensual details are in some cases my bread and butter yet at the same time my bane. I am amazingly dainty. Clop stories can be ruined by an author's mention of a taste or smell that hits my OCD and forces me into a fixated loop until I do a compulsive ritual to get rid of it. So the wrong sort of musk, anything with fish or sulfur, general filth, the taste of certain things, none of that strikes me as erotic, so I "scrub" my writing because, reading it is bad; I have to write this stuff and keep focus. If I don't like it it's not getting into the story. I had a hard enough time writing in stabbing and blood and lingering on the details in "O Fortuna" because it was a hard necessity. And I felt bad about it.

As for Swinging Cakes... headcanons ahoy I guess. They strike me as... well... beyond something like that. I honestly more expect the uncertainty to creep in. Is the sex sex or is it not? By the numbers, with assaults and murders from infidelity and similar, I more expect "cool, hip, with-it" swingerCakes to be in newspapers under headlines like "Mr. Cake blows off stallion's face with a shotgun" or "Mrs. Cake castrates husband with a bread knife." "Jealousy. Yes, jealousy will drive you mad."

But this is headcanons ahoy. Never mind the Cakes. It comes down to a personal feeling regarding the implausibility of swinging to promote stability in an environment of monogamous support structures and suburbanite plenitude. Doubly so in this particular universe. More worldbuilding going on, in that "herding" and anything like it is considered a heresy and pursued by the equivalent of the FBI. The average citizen would be the ones to dial up the OCFG themselves and applaud as the spooks took those involved in for questioning. So there's really a lot going on.

Thank you for the review. I'm sorry the framing story wasn't to your taste or standards and the attempt at funny Pinkie fell flat. But I think this was written with far less... not picky, not finicky, not pretentious... "particular" and "serious" readers in mind.

By the way, even if it involved a ghost gang bang (which was done well and was honestly very hot; devoid of context I'd be trumpeting it up and down the street) I liked "Stroke of a brush" because I ship Zecorabloom too. I just show the patient waiting portion ("Hatred would be better..." is their story; background references abound. They're about the most common background couple I show, everywhere from Canterlot to the Ponyville County Fair.)

I'm always glad to see some stories about good loving relationships.

Pretty much any critiques I had were already covered by 4354316 but still an enjoyable read.

4355119

Thank you very kindly

4355119

Oddly a rarity on this site, considering our source material.

4353272

I am so opposed to even consensual, non-pressured swinging that I bring popcorn, soda and a giant foam finger for that swinger episode of CSI

I nominate this for best sassy comeback of the year.

And I so knew what this was when I looked at the title. But I like consensual, married sex, course with two women instead of man and woman. So, keep the force strong master. And no I'm still not going to read it, just came to comment and see if I was right.

4355663

Check "Motherhood, Mayhem and the Mane-iac's Return", the latest chapter, "Jocks and Nerds." Furious tribbing and mutual clopping from Matter-horn and Zapp.

4355329

It's very weird. It's one reason I'm here. Loving relationships aplenty.

It's surprisingly hard to find simple, straight clop on this site, so thanks for making some more. And thanks for making it good

4359568

I try my best. I findthe lack of that sad as well.

I understand what you mean when you talk about all the sh*t the cakes are put through in the fanbase, I question why most of it exists honestly. In fact, this reminds me of a quote:

"In fact, it says here the cakes are getting a divorce."
The cakes burst into the room. "We are?"
I scoffed "Please, you guys getting a divorce? That'd be like Pinkie eating sugar free foods; you're great for each other.
They looked at each other and smiled. "Yeah, you're right." They walked back into the kitchen. "Thanks buddy" Carrot Cake said
"Anytime."

4362312

Because at least some portion of the fanbase are painfully "hip" hipsters who have a near-pathological hatred of suburban plenitude and stability. They want insincerity, the destruction of stable systems and opportunities to laugh as happy things are turned into misery. They think dysfunctional relationships are funny and therefore ideal.

I do my best to counteract the notion.

4363084 Very artistically put.

Really enjoyed the food oriented hoof play. A little bit of a hoofjob and a little bit of tickling *drools*

I found Pinkie popping up randomly and the Cakes being so casual about it, despite being right in the having sex, to be friggin hilarious. From personal experience, getting walked in on is a buzzkill and an absolute normal reaction would be to be freaked the fuck out. Pinkie being here cranks up the absurdity levels from 0 to 100 in a heartbeat. I do wonder if it would have been more impactful if the sentence she was wrote in on was deprecated into its own paragraph.

4419694

I have a bit of a hoof fetish, and paw fetish as well though not as much a some, and not with the usual focus. It's about the look, not smell. And I'm glad you liked it. I knew I had hoof fetishsts as readers so I hoped it would appeal.

The idea is that the Cakes understand Pinkie. On some level they always expect her to do something weird and audacious. Popping up randomly just... is Pinkie, purified. Plus I needed the Cakes and another pony to show that porn is normalized.

This was rather vanilla by your standards.

Get it? Vanilla. Because their cakes... or something.

I'll just see myself out.

4426846

Kinkiest vanilla ever!

Heh. Glad you liked it enough to make a bad joke.

This is fantastic! This couple is seriously one of my favorites because they have this adorable relationship and with love, their sex would be better than most others'. The fact that this was based on their marraige made this a more sentimental fic :3.

4359568

Especially the likes of Carrot x Cup and PinkieJack...

4353272

You're talking about that reactionary fantasy, right?

4883731

What?

4884987

CSI, remember; you were talking about it just earlier, am I right?

4886925

I was mentioning that I enjoyed the end of the episode because human nature obliterated the dope-smoking hippie ideals.

4888050

And how did they do that; what episode was it?

4890229

Feck if I know. I watched CSI went they gave blocks of it on one of the cable networks. Don't know the title, season or episode. Sorry but that's how it goes. I just remember it was about swingers.

4890602

Figures...

4900958

I would offer help but if I switch from this screen I'll crash or force a reload. Google might be of help.

4901481

Okay...

Yay! I love me some Good Kinky Married Sex for the Cake Couple! Good job!

Excellent story, but there is one very minor thing you may want to edit.

“She really is a sweet girl,” carrot said with a nod.

You forgot to capitalize Carrot's name in this one spot.

Can't break the bond, thumbs up!