Goodness Gracious, Vinyl
"Hey, 'Tavi?" a white Unicorn mare with a two toned blue mane asked to her girlfriend, whom of which the white mare was holding.
"Yes, Vinyl?" a light grey Earth pony mare responded back to her mate, twiddling a piece of her mane between her hooves, which were being held to her chest by her girlfriend's arms.
"You're the best girlfriend a pony could ever have." Vinyl Scartch gave Octavia a slight squeeze of her arms and kissed the top of Octavia's well groomed head.
"Oh, you!" Octavia sat up and playfully pushed Vinyl away, giggling to herself.
"What? It's true. You're the best thing to ever come into my life, Octy' and, well, I just wanted to say, I love you, Octavia, with all my heart. Eh, I probably sound like the most sappiest pony alive, huh? Oh, well-oof!" Vinyl Scratch was knocked over onto her back when Octavia leaped at her and wrapped her arms around the Unicorn's neck, and her hind legs around Vinyl's stomach.
"I think, that was the most beautiful and sweetest thing you have ever said to me, Vinyl Scratch." Octavia nipped at Vinyl's ear and blew hot breaths over it. "And, maybe I should say 'thank you'?"
Vinyl shuddered under Octavia, then pushed the Earth pony's head down into a deep, passionate kiss. "O-ohh! I wuv woo, Octavia! So much!" The hooves around Vinyl's neck and stomach, as well as Vinyl's hooves around Octavia, tightened, making their embrace impossible to get out from. Vinyl opened her mouth ever so slightly, and a warm, wet object flew into her mouth, she grinned while tongue-wrestling with her girlfriend, knowing Octavia always loved
tongue-time. Vinyl undid Octavia's white collar with one hoof, the other still holding Octavia to her, and she put the collar around her neck instead.
Octavia looked down at her girlfriend's neck, seeing that her collar had been removed and transferred to Vinyls neck. "Grrr. You look dashing in a collar, perhaps I should get you one?" Octavia licked Vinyl on her cheek and the tip of her nose. "Maybe only when we play like this, though." Vinyl retracted her hooves then slowly pushed Octavia down her into her back reversing positions.
"Ah, hello there, ma'am. I heard you needed a security guard to keep those fans at bay?" Vinyl looked at Octavia lusciously while waggling her eyebrows at her.
"Wha-oh! I mean, oh yes, Mr. Security Guard. I need a brave, strong stallion to protect me from those ruffian fans!" Octavia exclaimed, playing along with their foreplay.
"Don't worry, ma'am. I'll protect ya. But, what do I get in return?" Vinyl leaned over and pinned Octavia's hooves to the bed, earning a grin from her cello-playing 'friend'.
"It depends."
"On what, exactly?"
"What do you want?"
"Okie-dokie, ma'am. I believe I'll take some smoking, hot, earth." Vinyl spread Octavia's hind legs open and looked down grinning, but came up horrified.
"Yes, Vinyl? What is it? What's the matter?" Octavia tried to see what Vinyl saw, but Vinyl was frozen with fear and was blocking her view.
"I-it-it's a-a MOSQUITO!" Vinyl got off of Octavia and dove under the bed covers with only her tail showing and shaking in fright.
Octavia looked at Vinyl with a 'are you kidding me' look and sighed. "Vinyl Scratch, are you actually telling me that you, the most coltush mare I know, the baddest of the bad, the bravest of all stallions and monsters, is afraid of a little bug?" The shaking stopped under the covers and two large eyes appeared from the other side of the bed.
"Maybe? I mean noo!" Vinyl took off the covers and crawled over to her mate. "I just....don't like them. That's all."
"Really?"
"Really!"
"So, you don't mind at all that there's a spider on your shoulder, then, hmm?" Octavia grinned a little.
"Yes, I don't mind that there's a-a, wha? Ahhhhh!!!!" Vinyl looked at her shoulder to find, a shoulder, no spider or any other bug or insect. "You're mean."
"Relax, Vinyl. It's okay, everyone has a fear. Mine is not being accepted by my peers because of who I am. Yours is just your afraid of mosquitos or something."
"Actually, I'm afraid of all insects and bugs, even the ones that don't do anything. I think it was a phobia called...insectaphobia or entomophobia. I don't know. All I know is that I've been afraid of bugs for as long as I could remember."
"Oh, well, that's okay! There comes a time in everyponys' life that they must face their greatest fear. And I think I can 'help', too. Grrr.l Octavia pushed Vinyl back onto the bed, laying her flat and splayed out.
"Ooh, you gonna kiss my boo-boo all better, Nurse 'Tavi?" Vinyl fkuttered her eyes innocently.
"I'll do you one better, I'll go straight to the source." Octavia slid down and spread Vinyl's hind legs open.
"Mmm, I think I'm healing, Nurse.I need a smidgen more of medicine, though."
Octavia got closer and with her mouth to Vinyl, slowly, slooowly, and....
"Ahhhhhhhh! The mosquito! It's back again! Oh my gosh! It got bigger!"
Octavia facehoofed herself. "Seriously, Vinyl? Would you be happy if I killed the bug?" She received a tiny and hesitant nod. Octavia looked around and tried to find the bug, she searched everywhere, too. "Vinyl, I can't find it, so just relax and-"
"Ahhhh! It's right there! On the pillow! IT WANTS TO SUCK MY BLOOD!!"
"Oh good-Vinyl! It doesn't want to 'suck your blood', so just calm down and-"
"Ahhhhhh! Oh my gosh! It's not a mosquito! It's a BEE!!!!" Vinyl jumped off the bed and tried to hide under it, but, alas, she could only do that if she was a foal.
"Oh come on, Vinyl! Show some backbone! It's just a bug!"
"Y-yeah, you're right Octy'. It is just a bug, it can't kill me. I'm bigger than it, and stronger than it, and braver than i-AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"What happened? Are you alright, Vinyl?"Octavia walked over to the cowering Vinyl Scratch, putting a hoof upon her head to comfort her, hopefully.
"I-it f-fl-"
"What!? What is it? I'm here for you Vinyl." Octavia grabbed Vinyl in for an awkward hug.
"It flew in front of my face, and, and-"
"And what, Vinyl?"
"and, it brushed my nose with it's legs!"
"Seriously? Goodness gracious, Vinyl Scratch!" Octavia dropped Vinyl on the bed, threw a blanket over her, turned off the lights, and slept next to the shaking Vinyl Scratch with her backed turned to her. "Goodnight, Vinyl."
"B-but, 'Ta-"
"Goodnight, Vinyl! Octavia said sterner.
"N-night, Octy'." And with that, Vinyl fell asleep, only to be awoken when she felt a pinch on her flank, when the bee stung her. She was also silence once again when Octavia threw a pillow in her face and told her to sleep on the floor in silence.
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LOL. In rl, mosquitos spread some pretty nasty diseases.
Nice! Polish your writing style a bit and you'll be famous in no time!
Also, tiny amount of punctuation mistake, but excellent overall!
Thanks for the tips.
And it's true mosquitos are not the best bug to be in a room with when you're sleeping.
Loving this so far!
How long is the whole story going to be though?
this was enjoyable. I liked it.
>>CanterlotGarden
Thanks.
>>CanterlotGarden
Thanks.
Guughh, I am going to have to agree with vinyl here. Mosquitos are the fucking worst.
Not bad, but could use a bit of work on the grammar and spelling here and there.
Also, any particular reason Vinyl keeps spontaneously changing her gender?
4239403
It's my first fic. I was trying to go for roleplaying.
I'm going to release a new, different story, way better than this. Probably today or tomorrow.
4239725 Don't get me wrong, it was pretty good. I liked the concept, and for the most part I was able to look past the issues. A good rule of thumb, though: read the story aloud. If there's anything that doesn't make sense, it'll be a lot more obvious when it comes out of your mouth. Just a little editing advice. Anyway, great job for a first story; keep up the good work!
Oh, you should read my second story, I've been getting a lot of people favoriting it, and saying it's good. It's not finished though. But it's still good.
While the story was enjoyable. I do agree with deli73<< said. A little more polishing up and you'll be popular in no time.
Maybe an editor would help?
Just suggesting it.
Thanks for the tips, but this was a practice story, my other are better.
Did I miss an anthro tag?
Was funny and cute but seriously I figured most things as anthro when I'm not particularly attached to those stories.
Nothing to be ashamed of Vinyl, I once used my mini glock to kill a spider
Well I liked for the sake of just having enjoyed the story... I liked... regardless of the fact that I do not like the idea of lesbian ponies or gays...
Also I do believe the editing could use a bit of a touch up - which I wouldn't mind helping with, if the author would accept.
But over all it was a good story. :scootangel
4535600 Well, this is my very first fic, which I don't really like that much after some thinking and never really had a chance to really edit it.
4535982 Well that's very understandable.
This is so funny! Thpugh I feel bad for Vinyl though I agree with Octavia: They're just freakin' bugs!
4646378 Thanks, but I have to agree with Vinyl. I mean if anything pops out of nowhere, bug or not, I would be freaking out.
4647382 True. Hey, are you gonna continue "What Howls at Night"?
4647926 Of course. I'm working on the next chapter, but I don't think it'll come so soon.
4648071 Ok.
4648121 I'll let you know when the next chapter is out, though.
4648142 Thanks!
4648200 No problem.
I love this XD
This is amazing! But still needs some editing.
Have you ever considered doing a sequel where some members of the mane 6 come in and help Vinyl get over her fear?
5719020 Never thought of it.
5729925 Oh...
Well, at least I gave you the idea.
5729976 True. You are good and you should feel good.
5729981 Thanks
Awww poor vinal I can totally relate