• Member Since 18th Aug, 2014
  • offline last seen 12 minutes ago

Rainbow FlutterDash


"I was just thinking. Maybe I was wrong before. Who cares if the stars are dead? As long as we can see them, that means they're real... to us. Right?" "Right." - Rachel Amber and Chloe Price

T
Source

Just a little short story about Octavia and Vinyl Scratch practicing their respective instruments… in the same room. Which, for anypony who knows them, obviously will lead to… problems.

The name also has a double meaning because I’m practicing. Practicing writing that is.

This is my first story posted on Fimfiction, and is mostly only just practice as I said. It is also to figure out how posting a story even works!






POV Characters:
- Octavia Melody

Other Characters:
- Vinyl Scratch AKA DJ-pon3

NOTICES:
Contains Octavia x Vinyl, which is a lesbian shipping. If you are homophobic feel free to NOT read my story. But if you wish to read it, realize that there is nothing wrong with homosexuality, and then become a good, loving and tolerant person… That’s okay too.

I don’t have an editor or pre-reader and I wrote this really quickly, so it probably sucks. I'm not really a good writer and I know that. Just enjoy it as it is, for what it is: Fluff.
(I also know I overuse ellipses!)

Constructive criticism is welcome, but I’ll be honest: I'm kind of easily hurt, so try to be kind about it please.

There will be no clop… but there will be subtle hints. (Or maybe not so subtle). All only mention of course. No explicit mentions though, don’t worry…

This story concept could very easily have already been used by someone on this site or beyond. However, if this is the case, I have not ever seen it. So sorry if I seem to be copying someone. It’s entirely accidental.

Cover art from MLP wiki.

Edit: This fic now has a dramatic reading on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-5UUJ4bvn0

PS: Not planning a sequel or anything, but if I get surprisingly positive results I might. Let me know if you want one etc. etc.
I’m not a huge shipper of Octavia x Vinyl, but I do passively ship them. I’ve been reading a lot of fics about them lately and decided write some myself. That way, if I screw up, I won’t ruin one of my favourite ships!

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 66 )

Like Mydarkcookie said, you did do an excellent job on this story! (And that's saying a lot, considering this is your first one!) For most of the story, your mechanics and writing style was pretty good. The details you put in were top-notch! :pinkiehappy: And you know what, since I enjoyed this story so much, I'm becoming one of your creepers! :twilightsmile::pinkiecrazy::rainbowkiss:

5271706
5271685
Thank you both so much, it made me happy to know someone enjoyed my story. And Mydarkcookie, I was indeed intending some smiling. I actually wasn't even going for actual laughter, so the fact that you chuckled is a welcome surprise. ... I guess I should read through it again and check for the grammar mistakes... I'm too lazy for that at the moment though.
xStellar_Bubbles I'm glad you liked my writing style! It's actually not my natural style, as a crazy :pinkiecrazy: fan of the Hunger Games, I prefer first-person AND present-tense. It's a chore for my to write third-person and past-tense.
Still, I'm glad you enjoyed it so much!

PS: Since both of you are watching me, I feel I should warn you I might not post anything for awhile... if I do it'll probably be fluff. I should also warn you it could likely be Rarijack, LyraBon or FlutterDash. Or maybe not a romance at all! (Though another Tavi x Vinyl isn't out of the question...)

Great story,really made my morning

5271741
Thanks! It's night where I live though lol.

5271740 Aw, really? :applecry: Oh well, you can take your time on whatever idea comes next! :pinkiehappy:

5271912
Thanks, it's nice to feel pressured, but not too pressured, you know?
And I said it could be a long time. It could also be tomorrow. I have to let myself be spontaneous, as I am the victim of terrible mood swings lol.
Got any suggestions for my next story? Would you like to see more Octavia and Vinyl or perhaps something else?

Not one for same-gender shipping... even so you're a good writer.

While I'm not a fan of Octascratch, personally, I still enjoyed this story. Well written, and quite interesting.

5272435
Thanks! That means even more coming from a non-shipper of OctaScatch/TaviScratch (Whatever you call it...)

I saw on your profile that you like FlutterDash... you can expect some of that from me someday! Best. Ship. EVER! :rainbowkiss:

Hah that was incredibly fun to read, well done! Certainly for a first story, keep it up. :pinkiehappy:

Lol this was hilarious I really enjoyed this fic

My main problem with this story is that Octavia plays the double bass, because she stands whilst playing.

Comment posted by Rainbow FlutterDash deleted Nov 15th, 2014

5273170
Yeah she does seem to. However, in merchandise, such as cards, it says that she plays a cello.
Also, William Anderson, Meghan McCarthy and Jayson Thiessen - the show's composer, writer and director respectively - have all referred to it as a cello. And I have yet to see a fanfic that refers to it as a double bass. (Not that the fans opinions matter that much...) Anyway, not asking for you to agree with me, just explaining my reasons.

I hope you enjoyed the fiction other than that. :pinkiehappy:

Beside grammar mistakes it was very good story bravo to your first piece I really enjoyed it

I enjoyed this. Like, fav, and since I loved your other fic, follow.

5279500
Thank you! I'm thinking of writing another short OctaScratch soon... but I'm fresh out of ideas.

5279508 What about Octavia and Vinyl go to one of Octavia's friend's B-day party(who doesn't know Octavia and Vinyl are dating, or that Octavia is a fillyfooler leading to a cliche him asking out Octavia and being rejected), and Vinyl crashes it with wubs. Somehow. That may or may not be a good idea. I don't tend to have good ideas...and anything in parentheses isn't good I think...

5279553
Hmm, that's actually not terrible. A little cliche maybe, but cliches are cliches because they work.
I might not use it it, but I'll copy and paste your comment into my "Ideas" document on my computer. :pinkiesmile:

5279580 I am planning on writing an idea I had a while ago once I get internet back, that Apple Bloom got her cutie mark...and she doesn't like it. I think that's cliche, but...well, I kind of want to see if I can write good.

5279637
That's not a bad plot really.
If you want my advice - based on being a 'just posted first story writer' - would be do something simple, short. Get the hang of writing and letting people read it online. I was really nervous before posting both stories.
Another advice I'd have is try to do something that's hard to dislike. It doesn't have to be great, but if it's something simple like Octy and Vinyl practice in a 2000 word one-shot... as long as the grammar is coherent, no one is going to dislike it unless they are spiteful or homophobic.

I've had a plot in the back of my head regarding the CMC for awhile... I though what if only one of the CMC gets her cutie mark? Then the others would have to deal with jealousy, and her with possible rejection from the group. Anyhow, it's probably been done before...

5279678 Part of me wants to do a short fic with Button Mash waking up one day feeling...different Instead of staying inside all day and playing video games, he has a foreign want. He wants to go outside

5279709
Sure! Whatever feels good to you and whatever you're comfortable with. I don't know anything about Button Mash myself, except that he's the colt that Sweetie Belle says "This one's too young." about in "The Perfect Stallion" song. I also know that he apparently likes video games. But then again, I've heard Princess Luna does too... (Which is ridiculous!)
But really, the choice is yours. Your Button Mash story sounds simple and not very dislikeable, so it's great. Same is true for your Apple Bloom story.

I am really lucky that both my stories had positive feedback, the opposite, I imagine could be devastating. I am really no master at fanfiction writing yet and am hardly the one to give advice. However, I am pleased to relay my discovers to another potential author.

5279746 Thank you! I guess when I have more than a phone to go on this site, I will try to write one or both.

5279769
Ahh yeah... this site's mobile version is terrible. Not to mention, writing on a phone would kill your fingers...
Good luck! I'm watching you, so I'll probably read them when you post them. Especially the Apple Bloom one, as I said, I'm not too interested in Button Mash.

Nice job! This was a fun read, I always love a good Vinyl x Tavi fic, and it had the right amount of witty humor, fannon character quirks, and just that hint of romance without going too overboard. Thanks for your hard work and I look forward to seeing more stories from you. :pinkiehappy:

5298656
Thanks so much! Your feedback is greatly appreciated!
I hope to post another story next week... But no promises.

I already have another story up though. It's a LyraBon featuring a certain pink party pony.. You should check that out if you haven't!

PS: Thanks for the watch!

Vinyl Scratch! VS! Octavia Melody!

BEGIN!

[youtube=youtube.com/watch?v=EmxUTR5kLzs]

5741664
Haha! Yes! :twilightsmile:

Glad you liked the fic, and thanks for the fav!

First off I have to say I absolutely adore Octavia and find her quite elusive, if you will. Not much is known about he and yet we can see so much just from observing her design and the way she holds herself to the truthfulness of the old classic musicians producing beautiful symphonies and arias and truly awe inspiring works of art (I am a sucker for string instruments if you couldn't tell lol). You have a rather eloquent style and are really good at writing as far as I am concerned (sorry I have been reading too many troll and bad fanfics for research purposes and the quality of this was a huge whiplash lol). Okay enough about technicalities! lets get down for the story yo!

How she had ended up with such an uncivilized DJ is anypony’s guess.

It's not that difficult. Both of you are musicians with interesting opposite styles and have complimentary values i.e the perfect posinega relationship.

Okay this fanfic is going in my favorites pile. I don't care what anypony else says this is a wonderful tale. A true shipfic (at least for me) makes me believe the ship that the author is building and even changes my perception of the age old question 'Could they work?'. This fic certainly did so (even though I already believe in Octascratch but that is besides the point). You did a wonderful job at fusing comedy romance and slice of life in this piece of work. And for your first work it is realllyyy impressive. Also

Octavia facehoofed – no, that's a terribly unrefined term – she placed her forehoof on her forehead in exasperation

I just love little tid bids like these. The detail here is a blik and you'll miss it moment but it really leaps out like when you find a hidden chamber in a videogame. You just feel like the work has rewarded you with something and it just feels so nice to find a detail like this which is both funny and character building. Beautiful! So yeah I officially support this fanfic! And in conclusion I have only one thing to say:
31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4nin8iAye1qfndyi.gif

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Okay, being a first fic explains a lot about this. You definitely did better than a lot of other first fics I've read, so that's something. :)

Really Fun story, Good job! :scootangel:

6182445
Then why didn't you "like"?! :flutterrage: ... I'm kidding. :raritywink: :rainbowlaugh:

6182526 Oh my gosh, for the second there, you scared me. :rainbowlaugh:

6182529
Heheh, sorry. :rainbowlaugh:
Thanks for liking it though. :twilightsmile:

6182533 No problem! :ajsmug:

Have you read any of my stories yet? Just asking, i only like 2 of my stories, hehe. :twilightblush:

6182540
:pinkiehappy:

No, no I haven't yet. :rainbowwild: I haven't read a fic in months tbh. :twilightsheepish: :rainbowlaugh: Which stories do you like? Perhaps I'll look at them, but I'm very picky when it comes to stories I read. I haven't even read my boyfriend's only story! :rainbowlaugh:

6182549 Don't worry, I don't mind, since My grammar can be a problem. Well, i do like My story "Sonata apologizes" and "You're day with Twilight" But, that one is still getting approved. :twilightsheepish:

6182564
Ah, human tag is no go for me, :twilightsheepish: I have very strict rules... :rainbowlaugh:

6182577 Haha, Alright. :pinkiehappy:

6182581
Thank you for being understanding! :twilightsheepish:

You need to write more baby :heart:

6427400 you can do it. I believe in you baby :heart:

6441924
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it! :pinkiehappy:

6441933
I did. You have gained my attention.:twilightsmile:

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