Portal82
Joined 17th Sep, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Larvo · 22k words · 195 65 · 8.3k views
- wolfman93 · 1.4m words · 1,181 202 · 59k views
- Trillionaire Doge · 78k words · 500 102 · 15k views
- MoJoK20X · 41k words · 238 48 · 12k views
- Clip-Clop · 54k words · 481 80 · 17k views
- saltybedspackle · 182k words · 652 58 · 7.9k views
- SonicBlitz18 · 104k words · 734 152 · 26k views
- StormHoof32 · 47k words · 274 51 · 5.6k views
Featured In22
Clopfics11,546 stories ·15,814 members
Human in Equestria16,976 stories ·16,819 members
Looking for Editors3,384 stories ·5,415 members
Humans falling in love with ponies.2,411 stories ·6,065 members
Babs Seed326 stories ·352 members
Foalcon2,794 stories ·4,488 members
Human Harems518 stories ·3,624 members
TheBronyFiction1,787 stories ·239 members
Stats
Page generated in 0.038 seconds
Total duration
935 users online
355,635 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This was awkward But not terrible
More!
Will the story continue with the CMC next?
Not bad, but you really need to correct your spelling errors. I'ts kinda difficult to read with them all. but other then that pretty good story! Keep it up.
Here are some examples of the errors. Heheh sorry for not giving any!
It's small instead of smal and 'you' after gives.
walks
The first mistake is ride, the second is liked instead of like, and after Applebloom add a comma.
Hmm, this one is really confusing. I think you meant to say Babs looked back at you grinning, or something along those lines.
There are more but those are some examples. Just little mishaps along the way. I suggest getting a proof reader.
This was.... Readable. Aside from the numerous grammatical errors I will say that the flow of the action was written pretty well. As long as you improve on your spellchecking I'd say this might turn out good.
Hello readers
After some thinking and a boost of new idees
This one time babs fic will become a story with several chapter
where we will follow "your" adventure
will make the changes for that
I was planing to post the next fic that was to be a romance zecora x human one
but will post it in a new own story fic later
hey, como es que no les gusta a todos?, esto esta marabilloso, embarazo, bodas, potros reciendo, es todo lo que siempre quise leer.... porfavor continuar escribiendo.... saludos y... la historia esta bien como esta.... animo que seguire leyendo
don´t worry, i understand english too, but i like spanish much more, besides i like you story, just keep going please
2795704 SO AWESOME!
need an editor
The more you know~
there is one spelling error that just made me laugh and i wish you would keep it in there it is where it should say she started to bob her head, but instead it says booband i don't know why i just could not stop laughing
2799145
Hmm sorry but it have to go
but thanks for reading my story
hope it was fun
holy shit so many spelling errors, errors as far as the eye can see.
added a little to the story
intro still in the works
You need a proofreader, that much is certain...
And oh my God! What have I done to spark the idea of a Babs Seed x Human rape and mindbreak scenario where the guy is raped?
By the time the story is over, I imagine the poor bastard will be a mindless automaton, only there to hump ponies. Well, we will see how this story continues... 
um babs will be disappointed when she finds out humans and ponies can't mate.
2821466
Well I'm writing the background story for this
*Spoiler*
And well he get a mare pregnant
will be explained more
Hmm do you readers mind if I change it so that "you" becomes a person with a name
example
Anon
Think it will be easier to write and do it in a general point of view
What do you say?
This is interesting, I am Fav this and Follow it
2822479
you should use "got" or "will get"
The concept is good....but you dreadfully need an editor....
Have heard your readers comments about me needing an editor
so have taking it to heart
I have a follow author that will take a look at it
but he is quite busy with Collage so hope he can help
Agreed, I could barely trudge past a few paragraphs
I'm no gonna lie, I like it, a lot. but you need an editor and pronto.
*Seeing characters tags*
I can understand Cherilee but Mrs.Cake?
i could proofread it for you.
just PM me your e-mail or something so i can send it to you when i'm done.
3378713
*spoiler alert*
The mrs cake tag is there becouse she will come in later
about three chapters from now
3382626 Three FUCKING chapters?! How long do you plan to keep this going?!
i.imgur.com/wqCcUa6.gif
JESUS SHALL DIE FOR THY GRAMMAR SINS
3383009
have up to chapter 14 in mind as of now
will see if I can add more
3386667
I belive he did...
Well...
Getting help now with it so hopefully, the story will be more fun to read in the future
I'm definitely going to hell for reading this... meh, who cares.
I know this is clop, but...
You really, really need an editor. As it is, this is nearly unreadable due to a large number of issues. Your tense keeps jumping from point to point, sometimes in the same sentence. The story structure is uneven and tends to stumble, mainly from the large number of run-on sentences where you jammed together two sentences that needed to be kept separate. I almost get the impression that English is not your first language.
This story needs a serious run-through for spelling & grammar errors. There's at least one or two in every sentence. Your verb tense constantly changes, there are spelling errors everywhere that should have been caught by any spell check, including the chapter title which is a very bad indicator.
As it is right now, it's practically unreadable because all the time I'm forced out of the story in order to figure out what you meant to write instead of what is written. At the very least you should put this through a word processor and do a basic spelling & grammar check to fix the most glaring mistakes.
static1.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/4883563+_84f96b1e555aa94f34a0a20e5ce43b54.gif
Please fix the spelling and grammar mistakes. It takes away from the entire thing.
I am looking for an editor my self?=, If interested We could do each other's stories. I don't mind rereading to help a fellow writer.
Grammar errors distract from the work as a whole, good concept, however I'm guessing English isn't your first language. Either way just get an editor and this would be quite good.
3550078
Yes english is not my first language and know of the error and gramar mistakes
trying to find an editor or two
talked to Xunsusp3cted anomalyX, send him a chapter to edit, but have been some time now
have some chapters in wait but will not post them until some had have someone take a look at them so that it will not be an error nightmare for you readers to experiance
3554960
Trying but it is taking it's sweet time
This needs editing from someone whose first language is english.
3586702
Have someone from Canada helping me now
My God. The spelling and grammar is unacceptable. When I have the chance, I will edit this myself and fix all of the mistakes. Because clearly your editor is not the best at this. No offense. However, the ideas here are...very acceptable.
The Saddle Arabia history was fucked up.
3642744
I read one about a sultan like that
don't remember where
great story. I know some people don't like a story with the 'herd' concept being used, but I for one like it.
3651724
Like it too, willl see where this go
Getting help with all the chapter i have posted
A helpful brony here is Editing the chapters
So look forward to the further edited ones
And hopefully I can post one or two new chapters later this coming week
Strange. My name just happens to be James. I guess that made the story a whole lot better.