Let ideas and all speech be free. I will respect your ideas, your characters, your ponies. Feel free to ask me anything!
The Rainbow Factory, a place of nightmares where murder is justified to create hope for the greater good. The factory's never been a place that's ethical and lately it's becoming impractical. Following some recent changes to the factory's layout and workforce, new positions have opened up that need immediate filling. Why anypony would want to work here is a mystery...
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Oooh rainbow factory huh?
Just be prepared for there are alot of fans out there who will tear your story to shreds if it dosn't meet their desires. I got huge backlash when I first started Fall of the Rainbow Factory. Even though I finished it a long time ago, i still continue to be berated by people who come across it. I will admit that I did manage to gain some followers who did like it for its action but I think that it and maybe the characters where all that saved it. Just want to say good luck and prepare for the onslaught.
2512453
Fall of the Rainbow Factory was actually the inspiration for this one, this is sort of my rewrite of your story from a different perspective. When you asked me to review your story, I felt compelled to write my own. And yes, I sympathize with you but I also see the point of view of others who harshley critisize works similar to Fall and Tour. Specifically, Rainbow Factory is sort of a famous fan fic in its own right, people see anything adding on to it as trying to capitilize of its success, not being original.
Unfortunately for writers, the ORIGINAL IDEA FACTORY burned to the ground a LONG time ago. Tour is a reimagining of Rainbow Factory-style stories with more emphasis on comedy. What I'm trying to say is, I'm busting my flank to be both original and funny and people will still be unfairly critical of it. Such is life my friend.
But you can be happy. I enjoyed your story, especially the imagery so much that I decided to write my own. You're idea wasn't the most original thing but neither are mine. You inspired me to write this, consider the Tour to be partially a tribute to you.
2512557 ................First time I have ever been left speachless due to a comment.
Wow thanks and I really do like your story so far. And I think you are spot on by the way. 
2512596
Speechless? I made you speechless? Well then, let me give you a speech.
Are we not bronies? I said, Are we not bronies? When we do suffer harsh and at times unfair, unjust criticism, do we not ignore it? Do we not shrug it off as the senseless beating of a parasprite's wings? Do we not accept the constructive criticism? Do we not acknowledge, neigh(and I do mean neigh) cherish our own ideas, our ideals, our spirits?!!! Well let me ask you again, ARE WE NOT BRONIES?!!
I am a brony damn it and a writer. I was given this cutie mark, this talent in writing. and I am damn proud to use it. We all know there's no such thing as an original idea. We like to consider something 'original' when it doesn't have as much borrowed from something overused or is reinvented in some new way. My fanfics are the latter and they are still cliche sometimes. At the same time though, they're also classy. It's a beautiful contradiction.
Let me get to the point. No idea comes soley from you. But you know if you've stolen an idea or not. You did not steal Rainbow Factory, neither did I. I took Rainbow Factory, turned it upside down and covered it in tabasco sauce. Now that's original. If one thing Fluttersized taught me after being abducted by my own imagination, it's to be proud of your ideas. Believe in your own ideas no matter how cheesey they seem. Because any idea can be good if you put the right amount of effort into it.
So... you want to be friends? We could collab stuff. What say you, Shadow? I'll put faith in your ideas and you put faith in mine. Barro and Shadow. Now that sounds like an original idea to me.
2513240........
.........Yes. Hold on while I copy that speech over and show it to my speech class.
You are a brilliant writer and I can't wait to see what you do in the future and this story as well. Also, friends.
Heck yes! I look forward to collaberating with you. Hey, any chance you might be going to Bronycon?
2513792 Sadly no, can't afford to travel. Please tell me of your journies! I wish we could join our bretheren and demonstrate our dominance to the bipeds. The days are numbered for the upright mammals. Not including anthropomorphic hedgehogs or 'hejhogs' lol
2513919
Alright well maybe someday. Just out of curiosity which state do you live in? (Might be able to pick you up along the way.)
2513937
I live in the state of Equinsanity brother. Appreciate the gesture but I must decline at this time. For now, an amount of anonymity I must claim for my ideas, not myself, I want to find fame. Fear not, for soon the day will dawn where my ship will come in and I will get on. Until that day comes, remember this phrase: that you have a friend in me, always.
2514201 Ok, seriously do you come up with this stuff on the spot or are you just that talented?
2515215
Yes, I come up with it on the spot and I wouldn't really call it talent more like just luck but if people don't like it then I don't give a buck. Okay, that's enough of that. This is the talent that I think every brony has, what seperates us from a fandom is that we don't do anything halfway. We put effort, devotion into everything. And Friendship is Magic is the perfect thing to put devotion into because it's just got so much depth so it's really easy to dive into. Just take any idea, put effort into it and I think you'll be surprised with the result.
Racism in Equestria doesn't surprise me. It wasn't that long ago when the 3 different types of ponies didn't see eye to eye. Not to mention Earth ponies where considered slaves and Thestrals where considered a bad omen or curse and needed to be cleansed. Anyways....Interesting so it seems we have a spy. I am liking the build up so far. Keep it up.
2537456You poor thestral. *hug*
2545764 Oh yeah, been meaning to ask but, are you going to put up an avatar at some point? I mean the grey picture is fine and all but wouldn't it be awesome have you're OC there as well?
The reason I thought of this was, well, the weird image of you hugging my OC and I realized I have no idea what you or your OC looks like.
2546956 Ah, but you do know what he looks like. He's a white, somewhat pale stallion with dark brown hair. You know this from Fluttersized.
If I was to choose an avatar picture, I suppose it would be myself and Michael Hay probably in some sort of aggressive poise.
2548371 Oh yeah. Well hope you can find someone who can draw that. If it was just your OC I could maybe help with that but I can't do anything special beyond that.
Hmm interesting. Alternatives...Anyways, interesting how you mention the songs. But if everyone knew of it then I have tough time believing that no pony has tried to stop that. Besides what Booster is currently tying to do now. Also I can't help but wonder (random thought) why pegasi taste spicy according to Pinkie Pie?
2552644 It was accepted by too many as a 'necessary evil'. Remember the Rainbow Mill, this has been something that's been going on for a long time. There's just never been an alternative before. Until now it seems.
2552832 Oh yeah, also I sometimes forget that in Dark stories ponies can be...Dark.
Now that I did not see coming.
Oh. And now that song is stuck in my head.
2563518 Seriously, who honestly thought I was going to write a generic Rainbow Factory fic? And which song, Rainbow Factory or I guess that's why they call it the blues?
2563583
Blue by Eiffel 65
2563664Ah, forgot about that reference. Yeah, that's one that gets stuck in my head every now and then. I love how it fits in there though.
2563702
Especially the "Da ba die" part. I wasn't sure if I should laugh or facepalm.
2563734 Both.
Finally found an internet connection on the roof of the place I work at. Anyways good to see you have a new chapter out. This one was awesome! it has me really excited for the next chapter. Sorry but I won't be able to read these right when they come out any more.
I am currently working up north and getting an internet connection can be tricky. I will do my best to get on whenever I can. The good news is however that I have a bit more time on my hands so I am really pumping on the writing aspect. Anyways (sorry about the rant) hope you get the next chapter out soon!
2571794 Should be out soon. Looking forward to working on Fluttersized and a couple surprises soon. Should be just as 'controversial' as this fic.
2571794
Also, next chapter is the darkest one by far. Beware.
2573337 Awsome I love Dark stories.
I think you meant to say I don't THINK that's part of the tour.
Anyways nicely done. It really had me on the edge of my seat these past few chapters. Congrates on making this one heck of a Rainbow Factory story.
Edit:..... Wait. The CMC are on there. They have yet to show up in this story. This story isn't over yet is it?
2583457
Fixing and done. Thanks for catching that. And yes, the CMC are in the next chapter which is also the last. All and all, I'm happy with how it turned out too. This was a nice break but I'll be back to Fluttersized soon enough.
2638218 I can't take much credit for these ideas, for any of them. There's no such thing as a 100% original idea, that's something I've come to accept.
Credit for the idea is given to the artist the way someone looks up to a torch bearer. But he didn't discover fire; he only lit the torch. Attention is given to both the holder and the torch, we look up to them, worship them as artists because they were lucky enough to hold the flame.
I don't think I have much talent. The ability to create is an illusion I can't give myself. So I, like so many, make torches hoping that one will look down on me and light it or carry it. If one doesn't work, than maybe a thousand will. I'll make a thousand torches and I'll keep making them, hoping that one day they'll burn just as brightly and even brighter than the ones that came before. I'll do this every day until every fire goes out... or the world is lit with my ideas. My Little Pony.
2638218 But this one Shadow, this torch is for you. This was based on Fall of the Rainbow Factory, I said that from the beginning. I may have came up with a few different things but this is your fire, I just ran with it a little ways. We'll share the warmth.
It's literally only an idea that I took and ran with.
2642204 Well I think you just explained why we all like to write fanfics. Technically all other RF stories are Fanfics of a fanfic.
I also still think that you are a very talented writer because you come up with stuff I have yet to see in any other story. I love RF side stories, but only a small amount of them could actually be called my favorite. There are infinite ways to tell a story but only so many ways that people will actually want to read or listen to them. You manage to find those ways to make people want to read your stories. Can't wait to see what you come out with next.
Oh one last thing, if you aren't to busy, I am trying something a little new. Crusaders of the NLR is a universe that I am trying to bring into focus and I was wondering if you would be interested in checking it out? I only have one chapter out so far but I plan to release the next one really soon.
2644679 Again, how much of my work have you actually read? I guess... I guess I can admit that my ideas are original. Unique in some ways maybe. It's been so long since I had any self-confidence. I've been so focused on starting fires... I never considered that I could be warmed by them. Can I really take credit for any of this? I guess I could try.
I'd be only honored to assist you in your endeavours my friend. I'd be more than happy to help you with this universe you're creating in any way possible.
2645308 Thanks.
way better than the original rainbow factory
2654880 It's based on Fall of The Rainbow Factory by SHADOWtheHEJHOG, it's where I got the inspiration.
Least to say... I AM IMPRESSED!
The oddest thing to me about this story is that in this version, RD is NOT the factory's manager.
That's not really a complaint, though.
I don't usually fave OC-focused stories, but this one was well done enough that I had to.
8092010 I prefer creating other characters and scenarios that are going to involve the dark concepts rather than changing the ponies' personalities. Happy you enjoyed it!
I was just thinking, How much a changeling could Expose the Factory
*Cue Seinfeld Theme*