Life in the Crystal Empire over the last twenty years has been everything you could have ever hoped for. As Princess Cadance, the alicorn Princess of Love and one of the rulers of Equestria, you're married to the stallion of your dreams with a wonderful daughter in a beautiful place. Not to mention your many friends that love you as well.

What more could a pony ask for?

But recently, something's changed as the years passed by. One day, you learn that even the best of ponies can make mistakes. Even a goddess of love in regards to that very thing you know best.

Love and passion aren't always rational.

A cuddlefic involving you, the reader, and horse-sized ponies. Cover art by me. Edited by Kaidan

Higher res cover photo and an alternate can be found here.

Around a year ago, you were found unconscious in some reeds by the bank of Ponyville's river. With very little intact memories and nowhere else to go, Twilight Sparkle took you under her wing at the castle. She and Spike quickly became your found family in this new world. It helped that you fit right in with your voracious reading habit, almost enough to rival Twilight's. "Reader the Human" became your name over time and you saw a counselor, Mrs. Tendercare, about the issues that followed you through whatever portal took you here.

Now, you fight against your own negative self-talk as you do the taboo, and ask Twilight for a hug.

You and Umbra have been going steady for the better part of a year now. With a stable job and some nice friends to boot, you both have finally made the decision to move in together. Although, there's that lingering question in your mind of how a displaced human like you can get along with a queen like her.

One picture can answer that for you.

Contains: M/F, Human x Anthro Pony, Unguligrade Anthro, Rule 63 Sombra, Mentions and Implications of Sex (I put the tag just in case)

Cover art is NOT made by me. It's made by the lovely Evehly. (Derpibooru 2966607 - Pic is semi-nsfw)

Featured on 8/21/2023 (Thank you all!)

Anon awakes in a blizzard in Ponyville, vaguely remembering a past life. Anon tries to reconcile his understandings with an enigmatic new world, and Twilight tries to understand her. During this, Anon is given the opportunity to venture to Canterlot under Celestia's offer, and prepares.

Making money is kind of difficult in Ponyville, what with it being a small town. Luckily, Anon has found she's pretty darn good with kids, and there are plenty of parents who need a foalsitter. So far, nothing at all has gone wrong.
Until, that is, she's left taking care of a Pegasus foal. Nothing works like it should, nothing makes any sense! And it just. Won't. Eat! Hopefully, Rainbow Dash can lend her a hoof before the little darling starves to death.

Warning: Contains vomit. And Anon. Are you really surprised?
Image by MistyDash

LISTEN TO THE LIVE READING HERE!

You've never heard of this newfangled "League of Legends," but Luna seems determined to get a team going in the strange 5 vs 5 game. With Celestia, Cadance, Twilight, and yourself in tow, surely nothing could go wrong.

I mean, when has League ever upset anyone?

The Dazzlings have bounced back! The only thing that stands between them and total world domination is you, a gung-ho brony with a cool jacket, and Anon, a mysterious man with a well-pressed suit.

That and friendship lasers, if you wanna get technical.

Contains: Second Person, Anon, Present Tense, Equestria Girls, Parodied Song Lyrics, and a complete lack of respect for any of the above.

Alright, listen up and listen good because I'm only going to say this once. We are not a highly classified government organization. We do not operate above the System, over it or beyond it. Our primary objective is not to monitor, license, regulate and police extrademensional activities and beings on this great country. These interdemensional beings are not cartoon ponies from a kid's show called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. We do not officially exist.

You don't exist.

Got that?

...

Never heard of it?

...

Good. Welcome to the U.S. Department of Strategic Extradimensional Enforcement

Inspired by Tales Of The Canterlot Deportation Agency: A Typical Day by Estee.

[Warning: Tags might be added and/or removed as the story progresses]

"Looks like somepony has a crush on the new guy!" "WHAT! No, no I don't!" "Oh, she does! She totally does!" You heard them. Twilight has a crush on somepony else. You'll never have a chance with her. Just give it up, Dash.

Penniless, desperate for gold, starved for adventure! You are Anonymous, and you've found your way to Ponyville in your struggle for gold and glory. Instead of riches and fame you find three annoying fillies, perfect!

Originally written in late 2013, and converted into prose now. I've tried my best to weed out mistakes but there were many and I don't think I got them all.

Cover art by docwario. If you want your art back you can pry it from my warm, understanding hands!