You reminisce about your time with the now reformed tyrant, Umbra.
You and Umbra have been going steady for the better part of a year now. With a stable job and some nice friends to boot, you both have finally made the decision to move in together. Although, there's that lingering question in your mind of how a displaced human like you can get along with a queen like her.
One picture can answer that for you.
Contains: M/F, Human x Anthro Pony, Unguligrade Anthro, Rule 63 Sombra, Mentions and Implications of Sex (I put the tag just in case)
Cover art is NOT made by me. It's made by the lovely Evehly. (Derpibooru 2966607 - Pic is semi-nsfw)
The rhythmic sound of liquid pattering on the ground reverberated through the air as your plants drank the life giving water it needed from the watering can. You hummed a small tune as you washed over the roses and then over to the daises, swinging the can from left to right in a concentrated motion. The ground underneath was already becoming a little muddy from the excess water, leaving a smushing sound every time you walk across the dirt.
"Just a little more... aaaannnndddd, there."
The downpour of water slowed to a small trickle as you pulled back and admired your garden patch that you've been slowly building up for the past couple months. You weren't a perfectionist by heart; you can give or take on most things, but the way the daisies rose over the roses, didn't look too appealing. While this sort of activity wasn't exactly your forte, the lack of technology and other job-related opportunities has caused you to pick up a couple hobbies to pass the time. Not dying from boredom in this rainbow-filled land was difficult enough as it is; it was the fact that being in a rainbow-filled land was the cause of said boredom.
Who knew being whisked away to a fantasy world can be this boring. Isn't this every kids dream?
You shrugged away the dull thoughts and focused on your plants. With the summer sun shining brighter than ever, making sure your plants get the water they need was a top priority.
"Hmm, you need a little more—w-woah!"
The watering can in your hand was unceremoniously dropped when a strong pair of arms wrapped around you from behind, heaving you up into the air in the process. A familiar muzzle pushed into your sweaty hair before letting out a big ol' sniff, taking in your scent with gusto. Any person would've panicked if they found themselves dangling a good foot off the ground—that is, if you weren't already used to this.
"H-Honey, I'm a little sweaty, at least let me get a shower first."
The answer you were given was another deep sniff into your scalp, "*Sniff... Your smell isn't foul my king..."
You blushed at the nickname, raising a singular arm to reach behind and give those fuzzy ears a good scritch. The large figure didn't object as she leaned into your hand, sighing as her grip slowly loosened. Once your feet found purchase on the ground, you turned around to inspect your sneaky lover.
By looks alone, some might call you crazy, mad, or even deranged for even daring to call this pony your lover, but you didn't care.
Yea... you're dating a pony. A unicorn at that... Crazy...
Your love stood a solid foot above you—not putting her horn into account—causing you to crank your head back whenever you wanted to speak with her. While it wasn't too big of an issue, it has caused you to become the brunt of some jokes by your marefriend, when you accidentally wander into her chest when you're not paying attention. Hell, her biceps are probably half the size of your head, makes sense if she used to be the leader and queen of an entire empire.
Damn, you're getting off track here.
Shaking your now blushing face, you forced your eyes away from her muscles and... chest area, and looked up to the grinning features of the unicorn standing before you.
"Getting a little lost there my love? It has been a while since our romp in the bedroom."
"When you mean 'a little while,' you mean last week, right? I dealt with your heat already, my hips still aches you know..." The blush that was on your face burned out, but began anew when the memories of what happened in the bedroom started to reemerge. "You're not... staring up again... are you? Is that even possible...?"
Now it was her turn to blush, "No... but I can use my magic to speed up—"
"—I'm good, I'm good." Your bruised hips will thank you later.
She tilted her head before shrugging, "Are you done now Anon? We still have to move all my stuff to your abode."
Wiping the sweat from your forehead, you gave an exasperated sigh, "I still don't understand why we don't just hire some unicorns to use their magic for us." You then raised your arms in a sarcastic manner, "Orrrr, somepony may perhaps have some magic of her own. The dark magic kind, but I'm not sure where I'd find one... Do you know anypony of some kind, my love?" To top off your little display, you placed a hand under your chin, giving the best "thinking" face you could muster up.
To say the unicorn was unimpressed is an understatement. She crossed her arms and looked down at you. "Well, on the contrary, Anon. I'm not allowed to show public displays of dark magic whatsoever—"
"—You're just moving boxes—"
"—AND, I can't be seen in public without my magic dampener—"
"—You hate that thing!—"
"—ALSO, we mustn't use our bits on mundane things, such as moving and packing unicorns."
Jeez, the sass on this woman. You rolled your eyes and picked up the watering can, which was already empty at this point. "Whatever am I going to do with you, Umbra..."
"Nothing from what I can see."
With your free arm, you wrapped around the tall pony waist and reached up to give her a small peck on the cheek. "To be honest, I'm glad the universe spat me out to these lands; otherwise... I would've never met you." Leaning your head onto her arm, you both made the short trek back to your house.
Umbra took advantage of the closeness and returned the kiss to your head. "My return here to Equestria may have been for... other purposes. But I won't deny that my time with you has been the best of my entire 1000 years of living."
"You don't look a day over 1000 my queen."
She gave you a snort in response.
With the backdoor in view, you quickly shook off any dirt that was stuck to your gardening shoes and laid the watering can right next to the steps leading up to your house. With a quick swipe on the doormat, you both were inside.
"I'm going to take a shower now. Once done, we can go to your house and bring your stuff in." You turn to her and awaited a response, only for her to tilt her head and frown a little. "...What?" No, not again...
"You know what I'm going to say," She crossed her arms.
"Come ooonnnnnn, I need my shower, I feel dirty."
This was and still is a consistent argument you both have. It's so stupid that you can't help but dread when she sees you go into the bathroom at any time of the day.
She likes your scent. A lot.
"Marking your stallion" plays a big part in relationships for ponies. The mare would usually leave their scent all over their stallion to "mark" their lover—this is usually done by cuddling or rubbing their fur on your body—basically telling any other mare "fuck off, he's taken" without actually having to be there. When you wash yourself, your basically ridding all the hard work that your mate has put in and they have to start from square one, leading to more cuddling sessions—you didn't mind of course. When you both officially became a couple, she was aaaallll over you. Literally.
Snuggling in bed? She's basically crushing you with her body.
Walking in public? She rubs your head with hers and growls at any other mare who gets too close.
Even going to the marketplace was a problem. That poor worker... But hey, you love her and she loves you back, that's all that matters.
That being said, you never understood her clinginess. When you first got here and met her, she was a... loner, to say the least. Always staying away from the big crowds, never attending parties, that kind of stuff. The first time you attempted to start up a conversation, you were mostly given one word responses before she just walked away. Of course, once Twilight explained who she was and what she did, you kept your distance, but there was that nagging feeling that something wasn't right.
She was like you.
Not the whole taking over Ponyville and brainwashing the citizens thing, nothing like that; it was the fact that both of you didn't fit in with the crowd.
A human who was thrown halfway across the universe for some unknown reason, and an ex-queen who is now serving time in the very place she wanted to take over. Twilight's reasoning behind her stationing in Ponyville was that she hoped Umbra could learn the values of friendship in the same place where she learned them.
But it's hard to make friends when the entire populace avoids you like the plague.
Luckily you weren't shown the same treatment. Ponies were wary, but with some parties from Pinkie and a couple of good deeds, you got on the nice side of mostly every pony in the town. Same couldn't be said for Umbra.
Maybe that's where her clinginess comes from? She must be touch-starved from all the negative reactions she has been getting from the public eye... or maybe this is what she wanted all along...
Theorizing can wait, you really needed to get clean.
"Soooooo, shower?"
"...No. You smell fine."
"Well... my house, my rules-w-wait I was j-joking!"
You had the unpleasant feeling of being lifted up in the air again just as she started to turn for the door, "C-Come on Umbra! I'm not a baby, put me down!"
"No."
Uuugghhhh.
"Didn't know you had so much stuff..."
The walk to Umbra's house didn't take too long, probably five minutes. The once filled living room was now covered in various boxes of different sizes. To your surprise, there was a lot more than you were expecting. You've been to her house from time-to-time, but you never actually took the chance to look around thoroughly and see how many knick-knacks she really had.
"My lifestyle is not a minimalist one. I had some of my goods transported from the... Crystal Empire." Her eyes go distant as soon as she mentioned the empire she once ruled, something you always tried to not bring up.
Alright, change the subject...
"I-um-uhhh, what is this?" You grabbed a random black crystal that sat on one of the many boxes. It was perfectly shaped in a flower that shined in the light when you turned it. "Is this a... angelonia?"
Her disconnection was broken when you mentioned the dark crystal flower. Her eyes widen for a moment before she reached for the shiny crystalline. "No, it's a black petunia... My favorite." Oh? I didn't know she liked flowers.
"O-Oh! Why didn't you tell me petunias were your favorite? I could see if Roseluck has any."
She shook her head, "No. Black petunias require special care. The specific climate needed are difficult to maintain for such a plant, especially in Ponyville. They can't be naturally grown by seeds."
Noticing the confusion on your face, she started to give you the rundown of how such plants are grown, giving you details of how they needed to be made by "cuttings." Suffice to say, she knew more about flowers than you do... and you're a gardener now!
Need to talk to Rose about this. At least she's not thinking about the Crystal Empire anymore.
You now had a goal set in mind, "Hmm, I'll see what I can do Umbra."
The next couple of minutes consisted of laborious and strenuous effort on your part. You weren't the fittest person in the world, with a more lean build compared to your marefriend's muscular stature. Your new strictly vegan diet—with fish on certain occasions—removed any lingering fat that was left on your body, giving you that, "new year, new me" look that you never thought you would have if you were still living on Earth. Although your time in the apple fields with Applejack and Big Mac are slowly building up your muscles.
Who knows? Maybe you will get as strong as Umbra one day... yea no.
Wonder what this box is filled wit—
BANGCRASH
"OW, motherf... ouch." You held your curse in and inspected your big toe that just crashed into the doorway. "Terrible day to wear flip-flops... and I dropped the box." The contents of the package were thankfully not anything fragile, just a couple of books and a picture frame.
Picture frame?
"Picture frame?"
The small brown frame stuck out to you like a sore thumb, you can't really recall if Umbra ever hung any photos, she isn't the memorabilia type. Unless this is... "It can't be..." The picture in question held a moment that you will cherish for the rest of your life.
The very first kiss you and Umbra had under the moonlight.
Although you were peeved that Rarity ruined the moment by sneaking a picture without consulting you or Umbra, but you can at least thank her for the fond memory that you can look back on in years to come.
Umbra was just now coming back from the wagon from the corner of your eye, so with a turn of your head, you smiled.
"UMBRA! Couldn't you have gotten your own shopping cart?!"
Both you and the unicorn stood in the middle of an aisle, with the mare holding a plastic box in her hand. Some ponies, hearing the commotion, turned their heads towards the odd pair, some with raised eyebrows and others with concerned expressions. It's not every day you see a human and an ex-tyrant browsing in the cooking section. The unicorn in question gave you the side-eye before dumping the box of pasta into your cart. You could only sigh as you continue down the aisle, ignoring the stares from the small crowd around you. Not the shopping trip I was hoping for...
You were expecting a nice, relaxing outing to get the day started. The new market store that opened up in Ponyville gave you the perfect chance to invite Umbra and maybe even buy some sweets so you can both share. God, how wrong you were... She clearly took the chance to use you as a free bits machine to buy whatever she wanted. In hindsight, maybe you should've gone alone.
"When I asked you to join me, I meant for it be a nice little get together between friends. Not for you to rinse my wallet dry." You grumbled.
"You insisted I come out to join you, so I'm doing just that." She replied with a small shrug.
She wasn't wrong; you did go up to her house and wake her up from her morning nap. It was the first time you'd ever seen her with a frazzled mane and some... cute pajamas, most likely made by Rarity.
"Yeah, I invited you because you're always cooped up in your house Umbra, it's not good for you. If you want ponies to start trusting you, than you're going to need to start getting out more to socialize."
She gave you a disgusted look and continued forward, "Bah! I don't need to socialize. All these ponies should know their places, and that's underneath my hooves." She stuck her head up in the air like a noble would and stared down all the other ponies who were browsing goods.
You huffed in indignation, "Including me?"
That actually got her to stop, causing you to accidently bump into her butt with the shopping cart.
After a brief moment of silence, you were about to speak before she beat you to the punch, "...No, you're different." Then she continued onward, disappearing around a corner.
Great... Nice job Anon...
You sighed and pushed forward through the different aisles, trying to find the ingredients you needed for the special dish you wanted to make tonight. Unknowingly, you made it to the cereal section, "Sparkle-O's? Does Twilight even know they have a cereal named after her?" You turned the box around and were greeted with a small word search. A crudely drawn picture of your purple friend stood right next to the box of letters. "...Meh, good enough." You tossed the box into the cart and moved forward.
The right side of the store was completely empty, no doubt from the big unicorn passing by and scaring anypony who was in her way. Finally, you were able to get most of the ingredients you needed, crossing the items off your list in the process.
"Ooookay, done now. Where's the checkout line?"
A couple of turns led you towards a line of ponies who were waiting to check their items—just what you were looking for—but before you could even reach it, you heard the distant sounds of hooves, accompanied by a faint giggle. You paid no mind, thinking it was just some random foal running around and getting a peek at the odd alien—that is, until the noise got closer and closer until they were just behind you. Before you even had the chance to turn around, something collided with your back.
"HEY NON-NON! HOW ARE YOU!"
There was only one mare you knew who had that bubbly, high-pitched voice. "A-Alright Pinkie... you can let go now. Y-You're... kinda crushing m-me..." Despite being a good couple inches above the mare, she still managed to slightly lift you off the ground with that bone-crushing hug, no doubt from the earth pony strength she possesses. Hell, if this is how Pinkie hugs, then you don't want to imagine what Applejack can do...
The hyperactive mare finally lets go after a good couple taps on her arm, letting you heave some air into your body. "Oops, heh. Sorry Non-non."
Your heavy breathing dies down as you set your eyes on the pink pony, "It's fine..." Wait. "Non-non? You couldn't think of anything better?" You chuckled.
This was a one-sided game Pinkie liked to play; you couldn't remember who started it or if you even did anything to warrant such odd behavior from the mare, but whenever you two met up, she would always have a different variation of your name.
"Well I think it's better than Nonny. Unless you want me to start calling you Ann-Ann."
You cringed, "Yea, no. I'll stick with Non-non, thank you."
She giggled, "Soooooooo... what are you buying? OOH! Sparkle-O's!"
In the blink of an eye, she somehow teleported to the inside of your shopping cart, inspecting the box of cereal you had hand-picked a while ago. By now, you've already gotten used to the antics of the earth pony. You honestly don't know how Cheese Sandwich (you can't believe that's an actual name) manages to put up with the energetic mare, but he seems to be on par with the mare's bubbly personality, so that's probably why.
"Oh yea, about that. Should we tell Twilight about this?"
The pink mare shook her head, "Nahhh, I think she'd actually like it. Ooh! I'll send her one actually!" And just like that, she puts the box in her hair.
How does she function? And where did the box go?! "Umm... Pinkie. You wouldn't happen to see Umbra anywhere? She was with me before she took off, and I haven't seen her since."
Her eyes lit up, "Umbra is here?! I still have to give that grumpy mare her party!" She pulls out a notepad from... wherever, "What do you think she likes? You know her the best out of anypony! Frosted sprinkle cupcakes? Or a chocolate-filled donut? Ooh! Or maybe she wants a big ol' cake?"
You... honestly don't know. For the seven months you've known the mare, you've barely had any clue what her favorite confections are. "Uhh... probably chocolate."
"Okey-dokey-lokey! I'll make sure to keep that in mind! Thank you, Non-non, but I have to go now!" She jumps out of your cart and bounces to the front of the store. A stallion who was scouring the magazine section barely had time to maneuver out of the way from the bouncing pony.
You sigh, "Jeez, she has too much energy for 10 o'clock in the morning."
"I must agree."
The voice beside you belonged to none other than the unicorn you were looking for. "And where were you? You just walked off on me!"
She looked away from you, "...Thinking."
"About?"
She took a deep breath, "I apologize for my actions before. I shouldn't have been... rude, you were only trying to be nice to me. This entire... friendship lesson is new to me. When we first began speaking to each other, I thought all of this was for naught. I—"
You held out a hand, stopping her line of talk that she had most definitely rehearsed. "Umbra, it's alright; I forgive you. Just you apologizing shows how far you've come." You weren't wrong in any way, if this was Umbra seven months ago, you wouldn't even have gotten an acknowledgement. After you spoke those words, she did something unexpected.
She smiled.
In all your months of knowing this unicorn, she never once smiled. Even on the brightest days from Twilight's sun, you never seen her mouth do a 180 from that frown she always wears. You felt special, knowing that you were the only individual she could let her guard down around. It was... nice. It's now or never.
"Umbra... I-I have to tell you something." You nervously said.
She tilted her head. "What is it Anon?"
"I-I..." COME ON, SAY IT. "I just w-wanted to know... if you would like to join me for dinner t-tonight? A-At my house..."
Her eyes went wide a little. She definitely was not expecting that question to come out of your mouth. Seconds ticked by as the silence only made your anxiety grow to even higher levels. It's like you dipped your hands in a bucket of water with how sweaty they started to get. You tried to hide the fact by wiping your palms on the sides of your pants.
After what seemed like forever, she spoke. "...Sure Anon, at what time?"
Hearing those words just lifted a major weight off your shoulders. You wanted to scream to the heavens, but there were more important matters at hand right now, like figuring out the correct time. "At eight. Nothing too fancy, just some dinner between f-friends."
"Alright, I'll be waiting." She said, her smile not leaving.
That large, stupid grin on your face said it all as you continued to wait in line...
... ...
"You're paying..."
Sigh...
"RARITY! PLEASE! I JUST NEED SOME ADVICE!"
"Darling, couldn't you have come at a different time? A mare such as myself is very busy at this moment."
You never thought you would stoop this low in life. You're currently on your knees, tugging the fashionista's dress as she tries her best to sew her latest line of clothes despite the added difficulty of a whole human trying to mess up her work. A couple hours had passed since the shopping trip, with Umbra returning back to her house while you scrambled to come up with anything to set the mood for tonight. The thing is... you don't know shit about mares.
You never asked a girl out before back on Earth, so you don't have a clue what a female needs or wants from a man. You were quite the loner. But this is no ordinary female; she's a pony first off, part of royalty back in the day, and not to mention, you have NO IDEA what she even likes! Does having fangs in her mouth mean she can eat meat? Is she expecting a five-star meal from you?! God! So many questions!
Wait... Is this a date? I did say it was dinner between friends, but that could mean anything!
Your line of thought was cut off when the unicorn let out a frustrated sigh, "If I help you out with your little problem, will you let me continue my work?"
You rapidly nodded.
She dropped the sewing needle she was holding and took her reading glasses off. "Fine darling, what is the issue?"
"I uhh... I asked... Umbra... out on a... date..." This is so embarrassing...
Rarity gasped, a small glint appearing in her eyes, "OH! Why didn't you just say so? Darling, this is wonderful! You're finally coming out of your shell!" She got off her chair just as you stood up with aching knees. "You made the right choice coming to me darling! Although I won't question your taste in that brute of a unicorn, I will help nonetheless!"
You frowned a little at her wording, but overall, you were just happy for her assistance. "W-What do I need to do? She's coming over to my place at eight, and I don't have a clue on what to make or prep."
"Do not fret my darling! Just give me all the details while I prepare some tea."
You nodded, "Well, it started this morning..."
For the better part of an hour, you went over in great detail what transpired this morning. Waking up Umbra, heading to the new shopping center, your small verbal fight you both had, then her apologizing in the end, you explained everything while the unicorn sitting opposite you listened with great interest. She is no doubt taking mental notes to tell all her friends like the gossip mare she is.
That isn't to say she wasn't any help; she explained all the things a stallion should do in a situation with a mare. Some of them were quite obvious, like holding the door open or pulling back their chair like a gentlecolt, or in your case, a gentleman. But some advice was much harder to learn, like the body language of a pony. Ears and tail could indicate if your date is having a good time or not; tail flicks can reveal if one is nervous, while ears pointing forward can mean they're interested in whatever topic you're discussing. Suffice to say, you're overwhelmed by all this information.
"Crap! Thank you Rarity, b-but I gotta start cooking now. Thanks for the tea!" You only had four hours till the clock strikes eight. Cooking and cleaning your house will take up the better part of a hour or two, getting started early will be the most ideal.
"Alright darling, make sure to come by tomorrow so I can get all the juicy details, ta-ta~"
You dashed out of the boutique in a hurry while Rarity's words registered in your head, leaving a red blush on your cheeks.
"Yes YES! She'll love them!"
The apple fritters that you made came out beautifully as you laid them out on the kitchen table. Who knew those cooking lessons with Applejack would pay off? Next was the hay; to any person, a hayburger with dandelions on the side may be the most disgusting thing ever, but to a pony, it's a delicacy. To add on, you grabbed a basket and filled it with as many different fruits as you could think of, ending off with apple cider as the drink for tonight. 'Ending off' may have been a little lie. You had one last dish in your arsenal: tuna casserole.
A huge 50/50 on your part. If she eats meat, good! You both can enjoy it. If she can't, then you'll just pretend you never made it and throw it away.
"Remember, nothing special, just a casual dinner." You mumbled to yourself.
With 30 minutes to spare, you used your remaining time to throw all the pots and pans into the sink while you freshened up. Once all was said and done, you waited in your living room.
"Five more minutes... Just relax, man, you got this."
... ... ...
"Fuck me! Why, WHY! Out of all ponies, why'd it have to be her?!" This small crush was something you thought would go away eventually with time, but as the months went on and you two continued to talk, it blossomed into something bigger. She was the enslaver of the crystal ponies! A tyrant who wanted to rule Equestria! So why were you drawn to her so badly?! It doesn't make sense...
Hell, does she even see me as a potential companion? I mean, I am just a normal guy, and she's a queen... sorta... Maybe this is all for nothing...
Knock Knock Knock
Your heart rate spiked. You honestly contemplated not even opening the door, maybe she would go away after a while? No, no, that'd be terrible, she obviously knows your home with all your lights turned on. With as much courage you can muster, you walked up to the door and turned the knob with shaky hands.
...Oh
You don't know why you expected her to be strutting in with the most expensive dress known to ponykind, you clearly did say this was supposed to be a casual dinner. She wore a plain gray hoodie that almost matched her coat of fur, with some black leggings to boot that accentuate her nice butt—STOP IT BRAIN.
Kinda odd to see a pony such as her wear these types of clothes; you always tried to imagine her wearing regalia like the illustrations you've seen, but now she's reduced to these "commoner garments," as she likes to call them.
"H-Hey Umbra! Glad you can make it!" You winced at your stutter, "Come in! I have all the food prepped and ready!"
She nodded but stood still in place.
...
"Are you going to move?"
"W-What?"
"You're... in the doorway." She pointed out.
You were indeed in the doorway. "S-Silly me! Come in!"
She gave you a questioning look as she passed by, but you were more interested in looking at your feet in embarrassment than actually looking at the mare. Once you shut the door, you both entered the kitchen.
"Ta-da! It's not the best, but I tried."
You quickly walked ahead and pulled a chair out for her while she stood star-struck.
"You... made this all for me?" She said, while staring at the row of fritters. She knew the smell was familiar the second she entered your abode, but she couldn't put her finger on it.
"Well... for the both of us! Mainly for you, I can't really handle sweets all that much." The bag of colored marshmallows you had in the cabinet said otherwise.
She took the invitation and sat down while you pulled out two glasses for the cider. You turned around and suppressed a chuckle. The unicorn looked like an anxious child just waiting to dig into their food, and it didn't help that the chair she sat on was a bit too small for her. Wouldn't be surprised if she started drooling any second now.
You didn't want to keep the hungry mare waiting any longer, so you quickly sat down with utensils by your plate. "Before we eat, I gotta ask. Do you eat meat? Or are those sharp teeth just for show?"
She looked up at you, "My body drastically changed when I became imbued with my magic. So to answer your question, yes, I can eat meat."
"So, you wouldn't mind some tuna casserole?"
She shook her head, giving you the all-clear. You laid the casserole in the middle of the table, completing the large spread of food. If your phone survived the transportation to Equestria, you'd take a picture of this.
"Alright, dig in."
No sooner than you said that, she reached for the plate of fritters with one of her large hands. You couldn't help but stare as she opened her mouth, revealing rows of sharp teeth in which she chomped down on the delicacy you spent all afternoon making. It made you shudder.
You stopped staring before she noticed and took a bite out of the casserole. Hmm, not bad. Mom would be proud.
You both sat in comfortable silence for the next couple of minutes; the only noise being made was the forks clattering on plates while you both dig into your respective foods. After a couple fritters, she than went on to eat some of the hayburgers you made, a visible grin on her face while doing so. You weren't even done with your portion before she started to eat her side of the casserole. You think being royalty, she at least have the courtesy to eat slow...
"Jeez Umbra, you're eating like you haven't had food all day." You joked.
"I haven't." She nonchalantly replied.
"I—wait you haven't? What do you mean?"
She laid her fork down, "What's confusing? I haven't eaten."
Was she trying to mess with you? "Like... is that a... thing... you don't have to do now? Are you like, magically able to not eat anything—"
"—I can't cook Anon." She bluntly stated
"Like... your stove's... broken...?"
"I. Don't. Know. How. To. Cook." She angrily said. Her ears raised up while her tail started giving angry flicks. "I had servants and maids prepare my food for me. I didn't need to lift a single finger, I'm a ruler. Not a chef."
Okay! Diffuse the situation. NOW. "S-S-Sorry, I d-didn't mean it in a bad way! Y-You're an independent p-pony! I get it! You've been living in P-Ponyville for more than a year, so I just thought you knew h-how to... I'm sorry i-if I offended you..."
She let out a loud sigh, "I... for the past year, I've been exclusively eating fruit and flowers. Only treating myself when that pink pony decides to drop by and bringing whatever confectionaries to my abode. I don't need as much sustenance like you do so I never saw any point in eating much... or learning how to cook for the matter. I can keep my health and physique in check easily."
What was once a comfortable atmosphere has now turned into awkward silence as you took in this new info.
...
"Umbra... can I show you something?"
She brought her head up to stare at you. Her piercing red irises staring into your soul before she nodded. On cue, you got up from your seat at the table and walked to the backdoor. Motioning towards the mare to follow, you walked away from your house and up a grassy hill. The unicorn behind you didn't even bother to close the door behind her, not did it matter, crime rates in Ponyville are practically zero. Turning your head to make sure your friend is following you—the only indication being her red eyes as her body is practically invisible in the dead of night—you continued your ascent up the hill. Once at the top, you took a seat and padded the spot right next to you. She took the invitation and sat down, her tail slightly brushing up against you, once more making you shudder.
Almost as if Twilight was watching, the clouds parted to reveal the large night sky, with its moon situated in the center. The small hill gave you and your compadre a view of the entire town and its beauties with key landmarks being easily spotted. The town hall, the castle of friendship, school of friendship, everything was in plane view for you. "I usually come up here during my free time or just when I want to get away from everything, it's a nice really nice spot to read a book or two..."
"...What do you want to get away from?"
Straight to the point I see.
"...Thinking of home... or... my old life I should say... I haven't really been able to let go of the past just yet. I try so hard to not forget the faces of my parents or siblings..." You choked back a sob. "It h-hurts you know, just knowing one day I'll forget how they will look like, like a leaf in the wind, my mind will blow the memories away as I grow older..."
Silence, and then she spoke. "Do you wish you can go back?"
You sighed, "At some point I did... Twilight and the retired princesses tried their best to come up with any type of spell they can think of. Old spells, new spells, none of them worked. Heh, big ol' waste of time anyway since I can't even be affected by magic... some natural resistance bullshit..."
You wiped a tear from your eye, "So... I gave up. Cried for weeks on end if you couldn't tell. I only stopped when Twilight and her friends decided to help me from the ground up. Despite all of them being busy with their lives, they still took the time to make sure I was comfortable enough till I was on my own two feet again."
This time, you shifted to face her, "But... there was still something missing. I mean, I was thrown into this world for a reason right? It couldn't have been all for nothing. I must have a purpose... and that's when I got my answer. You."
You took her silence as a sign to continue, "When I learned that you were living in Ponyville, I—like many other individuals—stayed a fair distance away, it's only when we started to talk that I realized we had a lot more in common than I originally thought." You took a deep breath, "I made it my mission to try and teach you the values of friendship, whether I'm doing a good job or not is all up to... well, you."
...
"You have, Anon."
You raised an eyebrow.
"When I got reduced to dust from those ponies you call friends, I was left in a void; I couldn't remember much, but it was cold, so cold... I thought my fate was ultimately sealed—to wander this black space for all eternity for my sins—but then I saw a light. It was faint, but its warmth compelled me to move closer." She looked up to the sky, "And then I woke up in a pasture... I don't know if it was fate or some being decided to take pity on me, but I returned to Equestria."
"Upon my arrival, I realized I was outnumbered, temporarily de-powered from my 'resurrection', and fatigued beyond belief; there was nothing else for me to do but regretfully surrender. I thought my fate was sealed, to be encased in stone for all eternity, but they took pity instead..." She touched the dampener on her horn, "They placed this vile thing on me to prevent my use of magic, and then they sent me on my merry way. I thought they truly lost their minds."
"To spite the princesses, I vowed to never learn the ways of friendship. Any opportunity they've found to try and 'reform' me, I made sure they failed." She chuckled, "I became as petty as any pony can be, and I reveled in it. They culminated one final attempt, and that was to send me to this town. A Queen, such as myself, couldn't possibly conform to these rules, so over time, I've come to despise these peasants, and they decided to show me the same vitriol..." She faced you once more, "Until one decided to grow a backbone... and he wasn't even a pony, no, an odd creature of the sort. One of the likes I've never seen before in all my years of living."
"You, Anon, are probably one of the most interesting creatures I've ever met. A being from another world, one where 'technology,' as you call it, dominates the landscape, to say I was intrigued would be an understatement. And look what came from it; unlike the other ponies who I send running away with their tail between their legs, you didn't show that fear; you kept coming back, and back, and back. These talks eventually turned into... conversation between friends..."
She reached over and grabbed your hands. A blush crossed your face as your eyes met her own.
She smiled, "To answer your question from before... yes. I do believe you accomplished your mission and shown this mare the ways of... f-friendship."
She got closer.
"U-Umbra?" You stuttered.
And closer.
"My friend."
Closer.
"My crush."
Closer.
"And now... my King."
Your heart almost stopped when her muzzle connected with your lips. She moved her hands from your palms and up to your shoulders as she deepened the embrace. You couldn't believe this was happening. All this time, you thought this was some sort of pipe dream, a wish that would never be granted. You mentally berated yourself each time you thought about loving this mare, foolishly thinking it would never work out. And now? You couldn't give a damn about what your mind says.
Your hands went up to her face as you cupped her cheeks. She let out a moan of delight as you pushed back with an equal amount of force, creating a small suction between your mouths.
Time at this very moment stood still. Two beings under the moonlight and stars, letting each other's long-awaited emotions out as they continue to exchange deep breaths with every inhale and exhale. Any passerby nearby would see two lovers finally letting their inner feelings out, not knowing that they were the two most unlikely individuals coming together to embrace their true desires.
One pony, one human.
A tyrant, an alien.
Nothing, can ruin this mome—
Click. Snap!
You both parted—much to each other's dismay—with a loud smacking of the lips and turned to face the noise. It was hard to discern anything under the moonlight, but the movement from the bush caught you and your lover's attention as she held you securely in her arms, baring her teeth to the intruder that dared to ruin this moment.
"Oh horseapples... that was a little too loud." A feminine voice spoke from the shrubbery.
That voice. "...Rarity?" You said.
Almost as if she were waiting for her name to be called, she popped out of the bush with a couple sticks in her hair, and a... camera?
Wait, that noise...
Umbra—who was still holding you in her arms—seemed to have caught on as well, as her temper rose to unprecedented levels as she started to breathe heavily, her tail giving angry flicks.
"Y-You... You... YOU HARLOT! YOU ABSOLUTE WENCH! I'LL HAVE YOUR HEAD ON A SPIKE AND YOUR BODY FLAYED FOR ALL TO SEE FOR RUINING THIS MOMENT—"
"—Umbra!"
"—AND AS SOON AS I'M DONE, I'LL THROW YOUR BODY OUT IN THE OPEN FIELDS TO LET EVERYPONY KNOW TO NOT—"
"—UMBRA, CALM DOWN!"
Rarity seemed to have gotten the message because she quickly got up and ran like an Ursa Major just entered the town as the dark pony continued to throw every obscenity she could think of. She even used some impolite words that you maaaay have taught her... yeah, you probably shouldn't have. Your lover wasn't done, though, as she quickly got on her hooves to pursue the mare.
You honestly don't know what would've happened if you weren't there; your hold on her hips is the only thing preventing the unicorn from making any hasty decisions.
The mare easily had the strength to rip herself out of your grip, but instead she held back. You stayed hugging her for the next couple minutes as she slowly calmed down from her vexation. Her arms eventually snake their way back around your back, giving you a chance to let out a sigh of relief. That doesn't mean you aren't angry as well; you may have to pay a visit to the boutique tomorrow for a little chat.
Let's not let this moment go to waste... You kiss her neck and slowly creep back up to her muzzle, reaching her surprisingly smooth lips in the end. The mare continued on with her angry glare as she stared where Rarity once stood, but at some point she had to give in to your affections. Cracks in her facade started to appear, which eventually turned into a grin as her lips puckered to return the gesture.
A curveball was thrown when Umbra started to lick your lips for entry.
Getting feisty I see... You accept her invitation and introduced your tongue to hers. This was your first time French kissing with any girl before, but by God! Did it feel wonderful, especially when you're doing it with the mare you love. You honestly couldn't tell how long you were kissing for. A Minute? Two? Five? Whatever it was, at some point you started to feel that strain in your chest, forcing you to sadly depart from her wonderful lips to take in a breath of air.
"Hah... hah... Umbra? Can I... try something? It's been bugging me for the past couple days..." You pointed at her red horn.
"Sure...?"
With her confirmation, you reached up and touched the dampener on her horn. The purple contraption glowed faintly before losing all color, letting you lift it up.
"W-Wait, it's going to—" *Swiiiiiiiiiip "—burn?"
You sighed in relief. "Phew! Didn't think that was going to work."
"H-How?" She felt around her horn, sensing no magic disruption of any kind.
"Well, I had a theory to see if my natural resistance to magic could counteract the abilities of this dampener. Seems like I was right." You twirled the object around with your finger.
Umbra looked at you in amazement before her horn suddenly started to glow. From the corner of your eye, you noticed a small rock being lifted up in the air, surrounded by a large, smoky, purple glow. She tested her capabilities by lifting the object, moving it left and right, and throwing it up in the air a couple of times before focusing all her magic in its center. What was once a rock suddenly transformed into a black crystal.
"Woah... that's cool." You said, mouth opened in awe.
She smirked, dropping the crystal in your palm. "You surprise me every day, my King~"
God, that sultry voice. "Heh, yea..." Your face turned apprehensive. "Umbra... you know you have to put this back on, right? If anybody sees you with this off, you know what will happen..."
As much as she hates to admit it, you're right. If any citizen, or worse, the princess, finds out, she'll be thrown back into a dungeon. With a loud sigh, she grabbed the dampener and slowly slipped it back onto her horn, wincing in the process. All the magic flowing through her body disappeared in a heartbeat as she gripped your hands in what must be a painful process.
"Hey, hey! It's alright... I got you..." Seeing your mare scrunch her face in agony was painful to watch. Fortunately, it lasted only for a couple of seconds as her features slowly softened back to what they were before.
Once the final box has been placed on the wagon, you are able to let out a sigh of relief that the entire thing hasn't collapsed yet.
Your mare stood next to you. "You should have never doubted your Queen. As you can see, your wagon is structurally stable and fit for the task."
"Yea, until we hit a rock, that is..." You had every right to be worried; the wheels were now bending at an awkward angle from the bulk of the entire thing. You really didn't want to spend any bits on repairs if this entire thing does collapse in on itself. And it was a gift too...
In response, you got a small slap on your back. 'Small' means you almost got launched to the grassy floor by your mare's immense strength.
"Don't dwell on such things and help me with transporting."
"Why'd you want to leave so soon anyway? Got places to be?"
The main plan was to clump all the boxes into small piles before making short roundtrips to your house. What happened instead was your marefriend disregarding your plan completely and just dumping all the boxes into the back and expecting everything to be hunky dory. You tried to object, but a stern glare shut you up real quick.
"I want to leave because of this dreaded sun. If you want to stay in an empty cottage with nothing to do, than be my guest; I'm going to my new home." She stated.
Great, now she's all pissy. You rolled your eyes (behind her back, of course) and made some effort to help. You occupied the back of the wooden vehicle while your mare took up the front. You thought about helping with the metal ring that should go around the waist, but she seemed to get everything on just fine. Odd how ponies act just like horses with this whole wagon thing...
"Ready?" She yelled back.
"Ready as I can be!" Please don't break, please don't break, please don't break.
With a great heave from your marefriend that would easily put Big Mac and Applejack to shame, the wheels started to slowly spin as the wagon groaned in protest, causing you to cringe just ever so slightly. A couple of boxes slid back, which threatened to slam into your fingers, but a rope tied around the top was able to prevent anything from falling out. And with that, you both were off!
"You good, Umbra?" You yelled towards the front.
She grunted heavily, "Yes, I'm fine."
That doesn't sound reassuring... The walk to your house should only take five minutes, but you honestly couldn't tell how long it would take with this much added weight. You awkwardly stared and waved at anypony standing by, trying your best not to look like you were dying inside.
You can only hope it will be a pleasant journey...
Yea... scratch that, everything went completely wrong. Just ten minutes into pushing and pulling, you and your marefriend had the unpleasant chance to encounter Derpy. You had no problems with the mare; you found her clumsiness quite adorable, if only a little inconvenient at times.
Like now.
"L-L-LOOK OUT!"
That was the only warning you were given as the gray mare slammed into the side of the wagon with the force of an oncoming train, causing the front right wheel to finally give out. From there, the three remaining wheels popped off as well, leading to an avalanche of boxes that nearly crushed you. Once the dust settled, all that was left was just a pile of packages, scattered mail, a broken wagon, and a dazed mare on the side.
You crouched down and checked to see if the mailmare had any injuries. Surprisingly, despite diving head first into the side of the wagon, her muzzle had no notable injuries whatsoever, not even a bloody nose. Likely a byproduct of the countless times she rammed or busted her face during her mail routines. She's practically immune at this point!
"You alright, Derpy?"
"Ooo... my head... yeah, I'm fin-EEP!"
Her wings immediately spread out once she saw the large form of your marefriend. She spared no time in flying up to the nearest cloud she could find, kicking up dirt in the process. The speed and buildup of dust in your face nearly made you bust your ass.
Luckily, two strong arms stopped your fall.
Coughing, you padded both arms that held your sides, "Thanks, Umbra." You turned your body, only to be met with an angry visage. Ah jeez... "Now, Umbra, it'll be fine. I'll just get some unicorns who can help us—"
"—Take it off."
"W-What?"
"The dampener. Off. Now."
You gulped, "U-Umbra... you know you can't. Look." You gestured to a crowd that was just starting to form.
Despite your nervousness, you knew Umbra would never hurt you in any shape or form, giving you the confidence to get closer to the raging mare. "Please... just calm down... I can get some ponies who can help. This will only make things worse for you." You whispered. It's hard enough that she gets a bad rep for all the things she has done; you definitely don't want it to exacerbate any more than what it is already.
Finally, her scowl slowly dwindled away and was replaced with an unreadable expression. She reached out and held your hand in hers before leaning down for a kiss. A collective gasp erupted behind her, making you remember that your relationship was mostly kept a secret—besides Rarity, who knew about your little paramour. You can only imagine the headlines in the newspaper tomorrow...
Who cares at this point...
You ended the kiss with a little mwah and faced the group of wide-eyed ponies. "So, uhh... can somepony help us?" . . . "Thank you, Mr. Davenport! You really didn't have to do this..."
"Ahh, nonsense, you're a great employee! Just, uhm... when you said you were taking time off to help your marefriend, I didn't think you were referring to... her." He pointed with his eyes to the large unicorn standing in the corner with her classic, unreadable expression.
"Yea... she's a... handful, you can say..."
You helped and coordinated where the last remaining boxes should go for the next couple of minutes as your mare continued to stare at the floor. When all was said and done, you bid your boss and his movers farewell before closing the front door. "Well, that turned out better than I expected! See, I told you everything would-" You turn around only to find an empty spot where she stood.
Wow, she's quiet for almost being 7 feet tall. "Umbra!" You yelled out. "Where are you?"
It didn't take too long to find the oversize unicorn crouched over a box in your bedroom, or technically, her room as well. "Hey... you, um... alright?"
"Yes."
Yea, no. You crouched down opposite her and closed the box lid, stopping whatever she was doing. "Hey... look at me... please." She raised her head with an exhale from her nose. "What did I do wrong?"
She turned her head away from you. "I'm a bit annoyed that you leapt to the rescue for that ingrate-" You raised an eyebrow. "Grrrr... that mailmare... instead of being angry with her actions like any understanding pony would..."
"Oh, Umbra..." You smirked, "Is somepony getting a little jealous?" Reaching forward, you pinched her cheeks just like any mother would to a child, which earned you a slap across your hand.
"Stop it. I'm not a foal, and I'm most definitely not jealous. I won your heart, and I know it." She confidently said.
A smile came to your face, "Heh, you know I never go for any other mare..."
"Good, because if you did, your presence would never be seen by any other pony. Ever."
You gulped, "R-Right... so um... what's in the box?" You lift the lid up and are met with an abundance of different colored crystals.
"This..." She waved with a hand, "...is my personal coffer."
"Coffer?"
"A chest of valuables... well, not much of a chest, but you know what I mean. All of this used to be in my castle before that excuse for a crystal princess confiscated all my commodities. I don't know what compelled her to do such a thing, but she gave me everything back."
Thank God, I put that word in for her.
You lifted up a crystal. In fact, mostly everything were crystals. "Wow, you really love your crystals, huh?"
She gently plucked the crystalline off your hand. "Mmm, yes... crystals..."
...Right.
You eyed all the contents. "I didn't even know you had this much!"
"Of course! It's my little secret. I have to hide it from anypony who wants to lay their grubby little hands on it."
"But why from me? You trust me, right?"
"How would I know you wouldn't steal these from me right under my nose?"
That hurt. "Umbra. You know I never do such a thing..."
"I know, my love, which is why I'm letting you use them." She pushed the box until it reached your legs. "With all of these gems in our possession, we'd be funded for the foreseeable future. No more of that job you have as a... ugh... a store clerk. My King shouldn't have to do such frivolous activities."
Your eyes scanned through every single gemstone in the box. If you trade these in, you and Umbra will probably be able to buy the most expensive mansion in Canterlot! Or...
"Umbra. You do know what's next week, right?"
She smiled, "Of course! I can never forget such a momentous occasion."
A wide grin split across your face. "Let's go pay a visit to Rarity..."
An exact week has passed since your mare moved in; all her little decor was finally set up, which made the interior design look a lot more livelier and not 'wearisome' as she likes to call it. One wall of the house you're especially proud of is dedicated only to pictures. Said wall contained almost every single important event you both shared during your time together: a picnic where she's wearing a cute sunhat, her flipping off the camera, the first time you try to teach her how to cook with a burning oven in the background, and most importantly, smack dab right in the middle is you and her kissing under the moonlight.
And here you stand today, wearing a suit and tie as you prepare for one of the biggest nights of your life. You reached out with a finger and brushed away any lingering dust that settled on the picture frame.
"I'm not fond of that memory as much as you are..."
Your eyes widen once you hear her voice. Turning around, you are greeted with the incredible sight of your mare in the most jaw-dropping dress.
"How do I look?"
Rarity did a tremendous job. Umbra's box of crystals worked perfectly in this situation, as her red dress positively dazzled. Quite literally, as all the crystals adorning the garment from top to bottom made her shine from every angle, making her the center of attention. Her red lipstick, coupled with the eyeliner that the fashionista helped apply, made her look gorgeous. While not as pretty as your mare, your suit also had the same careful crystals lined up on the lapel of your outfit, two on each sleeve, and a line of them right under the breast pocket. All of this is being done to celebrate your 1-year anniversary of being together.
"Y-You look... stunning. Beautiful even..."
A blush streaked across her muzzle. "O-Oh you... flatterer. Y-You're just saying that..."
You stepped closer, "I'm not."
"A-And these scars?"
You eyed both of her arms from top to bottom. Over the years as a ruler, she has gotten into many countless fights with ponies and alicorn alike, some of these battle scars being very visible across her body. A couple of lines where the skin hasn't healed cover parts of her arm—two large ones on her upper right and left shoulder, while some minor ones occupy her forearm. The most obvious has to be on her face; a small line went from the left side of her muzzle to the underside of her lips.
"Umbra... I could care less about these scars. In fact... I think they make you look prettier. It shows that you're not afraid to be... you."
She smiled and leaned in for a small kiss. Mwah.
"Aaannnddd... it makes my girl look badasss." Standing on your tippy toes, you locked onto your mare's exposed neck and attacked her with small kisses. She squirmed and giggled from your little smooches, a noise you rarely hear from her.
A noise you very much wanna hear more.
"Hehehehe, alright, A-Anon, t-t-that's enough!"
You obliged and ended your rainstorm of kisses. Adjusting your suit and tie, you offered your hand. "May I?"
With her blush still lingering, she reached out and took your hand in hers. "Yes... yes you may, my King."
The moon shined high above the dark sky and left its light on your mare's body. Your walk through the darkened streets of Ponyville meant less attention for you and your company, but that doesn't mean you didn't experience the one stare or two—you've lost count of how many times stallions had to pick their jaws up from looking at the mare next to you. But she wasn't the only one getting the attention, as some mares took turns taking peeks at you from around corners or through windows, but one look at your marefriend's disapproving glare was enough to send them away.
Everypony knows that you are hers and hers only.
Newspaper headlines had a field day once they caught wind of your relationship with the reformed tyrant. Hell, you even had a couple reporters come up to you during your working hours. Your close friends didn't shy away from questioning you either, as they were surprised that Umbra even had an affectionate side to begin with. Applejack congratulated you, Rainbow gave you a rough pat on the back when she returned from doing Wonderbolt stuff, Fluttershy gave you her best wishes, Pinkie threw a small party, Spike gave you a fist pump, Twilight sent you a letter, and Rarity... well, she knew as much already.
What gave you the most surprise was the message from Twilight, as she wasn't the only one congratulating you. Retired princesses Celestia and Luna wrote down their cheers and praises for showing Umbra the ways of love and friendship, with Luna stating, 'You're the only person Umbra dreams about'. While you got praise from the two, Cadance did give you some caution against your mare—her weariness stemming from Umbra's attack on The Crystal Empire—but either way, she gave you the equivalent of 'good luck' at the end.
Umbra promptly ripped up the letter when you read it to her.
The feeling of her tail wrapping around your waist brought you back to the present.
"Umbra! Nobody is looking; relax!" The tall mare was scouting the area with her red eyes, sweeping left and right to locate any unwanted attention. "They are all looking at you. Harlots, they are... I'll sho—"
"—None of that! Come on! We're almost there." You wrapped an arm around her waist and speed-walked through town, nearly crashing into a post at one point.
Finally, the restaurant came into view. "We're here! What do you think?"
Her eyes landed on the name of the building, "The Big Lily?"
"Rarity recommended it. Come on, I set us up with a private booth."
Despite the majority of restaurants in Ponyville taking a more medieval-style theme, it's clearly obvious that this building took inspiration from various establishments in Canterlot with its 'rich' aesthetic and noble themes.
Basically, only rich ponies dine here.
Once inside, a stallion waiter with a fancy suit and monocle approached you. And a killer mustache. "Anon and Umbra?"
Surprise he's not freaking out. Either he's really good at hiding it or he's just not scared. "Yea, that's us."
"This way, please."
Almost everypony in the room took subtle glances at your mare; some waiters paused while others continued on with their work. You noticed her gaze starting to divert as you continued to follow the stallion, her eyes wildly searching for any active 'threats'. A small squeeze from your hand was enough comfort to reassure her.
You and Umbra pass through a large doorway to the back part of the restaurant. The loud clattering of forks and ponies chatting decreased in volume as you both were taken to your designated table. From what you can tell, only a minimal number of ponies occupied the booths; it is hard to tell when the curtains are all shut.
"Please, take a seat; our waiter will be here with you shortly." And with that, he left.
Your mare took her seat while you shut the large red curtain to give some privacy. You turn back around to see that your chairs weren't actually chairs to begin with. More of a couch—a fancy couch—shaped in a half-circle, allowing you to sit next to your marefriend instead of the traditional face-to-face that you're both used to. More handholding for the both of us.
"So, what do you think?" You asked while you took your spot. The menus are already lying flat on the table, with a whole multitude of choices. Half of them you probably can't even eat because of the 'humans can't eat hay' thing.
"It's nice; it makes me feel like I'm in my castle again. Although a couple more crystal designs would be better."
Right, her crystal addiction. "Well, I'm glad you like it. What are you going to order?" The menu had almost everything, from salads all the way down to small sandwich bites. Your eyes glided to the desert section, "Hey, what's a... mi-cu... a mi-cuit aaa... a mi—"
"—Mi-cuit au chocolat. It's Prench for molten chocolate cake." She spoke fluently.
"Didn't know you spoke Fr-Prench?"
"There's no need for me to learn it; I can learn any language just..." She pointed to her horn. "...from this."
"Wow, impressive."
She nodded. "Yes, indeed. Now, confectioneries can come after; right now, you should be choosing what you want to eat."
You also nodded and browsed the different sections. No fish? Bummer... Reading the menu over, you noticed a slight trend. "Lot of hay and wheat-related products... guess I'll just take a carrot sandwich with some cider."
Right on cue, the waitress arrived. You immediately noticed her tail giving off nervous flicks. "Hello! W-What would you want today."
Once you both gave your orders, she was off, leaving you alone with your beautiful date. From there, you and Umbra talked about the future. The quiet and calm atmosphere, accompanied by the sounds of violins playing in the background, provided the perfect backdrop for your conversation to flow smoothly as you both awaited your meals. The topic of future plans then went on to talking about each other's lives. Despite Umbra knowing your time on Earth and vice versa, you still enjoyed making her laugh with all your outlandish stories of 'boxes being able to make moving images', or 'the entire knowledge of a library being able to fit inside of a small brick'.
Her past life was... well, complicated. She never really likes talking about the old days of her ruling, as the stories aren't really family-friendly per se. Her life as a filly was also lost on her. Being able to only remember small glimpses of what her foalhood used to be like. You scoured whole libraries to see if any could give you details about her life; sadly, the cons outweigh the pros, and you were only given the negative aspects of her existence. The food arrived shortly after, prematurely ending your conversation.
You picked up your drink, "To one year of being with my Queen..."
She picked up hers, "To one year of being with my King..."
You both clinked your drinks and took a sip. The hard cider, being much stronger than what you're used to, burned your mouth and throat. Umbra, on the other hand, didn't seem to have too much trouble drinking her glass. From there, you both ate your respective meals, with moans of delight coming from the both of you as you took your first bites. Taking advantage of the closeness, you wrapped an arm around her back while she ate. She wiped her mouth with a napkin and gave you a small lick on the cheek. Returning the gesture would only leave you with fur in your mouth, so you gave a kiss instead.
With the main course now being finished, it was time to move onto desserts. "I may have that lava cake now. What do you want?"
"I'm not in the sweets mood right now, but more cider wouldn't hurt."
You nodded and opened the curtain to wave down a waiter. After giving your next order, the stallion took the empty plates and glasses before leaving you and your marefriend alone. Wait, my glass wasn't empty...?
"Did you drink my cider?"
"...No." Her bright red cheeks said otherwise.
"I didn't ever take you for a lightweight. Now that I think about it, we don't drink a lot, do we?"
"No, the last time we ever drank was during the—HEY! I'm not a lightweight!" She loudly exclaimed.
You covered her mouth, "Shush! We can be kicked out for being too loud!" You hurriedly whispered. Despite the situation, you couldn't help but let out a small smile.
She removed your hand, "Take it back..."
"Take what back?"
"Take. It. Back..."
"What, that you're a lightweight?"
The close proximity meant that she was able to grab you tightly without much struggling on your part. "H-Hey, let me go! Let me go! The waiter will be back any minute now!" You whispered as quietly as possible. You tried spreading your arms out, but that only gave her more incentive to squeeze harder. Eventually, her muzzle connected with your hair, and she took large sniffs. "HAH! U-U-Umbra, STOP! That tickles..." Her sniffs traveled downward and into your neck, where she started to give long licks along your skin, causing you to involuntarily shiver.
She stopped, "I'll let you go if you take back what you said." And then continued.
There was no denying that she was taking pleasure in your 'torture'. You can practically sense that smile in her tone of voice, despite not being able to face her directly. "Last chanc—"
"—Umm... Ma'am? Sir?"
You both froze. You stopped mid-struggle, while your mare stopped mid-lick.
"Y-You're... dessert's ready..." Damn, the service here is quick...
Awkwardly, the waiter leaves your plate of cake and places Umbra's glass of cider down. The stallion gives a bow and closes the curtain.
"..."
"..."
Lick lick lick.
"Really? Even after we got caught, you still want to play."
Licks were your only answer. Wrenching one arm out of her deadly grip, you reached for a fork and took small bites out of your cake. Mmm, warm. Finally, you felt Umbra's arm leave your midsection and instead reach for the glass of cider. Even with your newfound freedom, you still stuck next to her and occasionally plopped your head on her shoulder. Stabbing your cake for another piece, you leaned in for a bite, just for your mare to chomp down on your poor utensil. Her sharp teeth quite literally bent the fork, making a 90-degree angle from the base to the neck of it.
Wide-eyed, you looked over at the sight of a giggly mare chewing on your piece of chocolate cake. "I-I—Umbra, I think you're drunk enough. You almost took my face off."
"Hey! I'mmmno lightweight."
"With the utmost respect, your majesty... yes, you are."
She merely grunted and drank her last bit of cider. "Mmmmore." How weak is the pony liver?
"I'm getting the check now."
You stumbled out of the restaurant with a drunk mare in tow. Her incoherent mumbling and shaky movement didn't help as you trudged through town in the dark with half her body leaning onto your shoulder. "Umbra! Can you at least stand up a little?! I'm trying not to fall here!" You only got a grunt in response before she dropped her head onto yours. Luckily, nopony was out this late at night, meaning you didn't have to feel embarrassed if you accidentally encountered a wandering stallion or mare. "C'mon, Anon, you got this."
The occasional streetlamp helped with your vision a bit. Having a reliable source of light made the trek much easier since you weren't planning on tripping and having the full weight of a 6'11 unicorn on your body. Crossing a small bridge, you recognized the path that led up to your house. It was at this point that you felt the sensation of drool streaking down your neck. Gross.
Reaching the front door, you opened and stumbled into the entrance as you dropped your mare onto the couch. "Anooonnnn... where'd you go?" You shut the door and turned to see your mare pawing the open air.
Cute. "C'mon, let's get you to bed." You took hold of her hand and pulled with all your might, only making slight progress in your effort to get the pony up. Eventually, she got the message and helped with your struggle. "A-Alright, up we go." You pulled her through the hallway and into the bedroom. Kicking your shoes off with a flick of your feet, you didn't bother taking off your clothes or pulling the covers off before collapsing onto the bed with Umbra by your side.
Man, what a day... "Goodnight, my love..."
No response. Not surprising, she's most likely asleep—
Your thoughts were cut short when your body did a complete flip in the air. Facing up now, the only thing you were able to see were the two glowing red eyes in the dark. "U-Umbra?"
A large hand rested on your torso, clenching your suit as—
RIIIP
"U-UMBRA! What the hell?! I paid good money for this!"
She didn't respond before giving your pants the same treatment.
Oh God...
You awoke with a jump, or at least, your body tried too. If it wasn't for the heavy weight holding you down, you would have fallen off the bed by now. The claustrophobic feeling of having your entire torso crush will throw anyone into a panic attack; luckily, you're used to it, as weird as it is. You sighed and laid your head back, Man, what a weird dream... Although the contents of said dream have since left your mind, you could tell it was a bad one—a really bad one. "When was the last time I had a nightmare like that?" Realizing that you were talking to yourself, you check the clock on your bedside table.
"6:20... 10 more minutes..."
You freed one arm and preemptively turned off the alarm. If there was anything else that you hated, it was that stupid ringing that you have to wake up to every day. "Why'd you buy that thing..." You whispered to the sleeping beauty that laid on you. Her tail subconsciously coiled tighter around your calf upon hearing your voice, a small smile coming to her face. It's only now that you start to feel the familiar soreness coming from your pelvis; the pain grew even higher when your mare decided to shift in her sleep, her head now resting right next to yours. Fucking ow...
During her shift, her red sharp horn came dangerously close to your face. It's a surprise you haven't ended up in the hospital sooner, given how many times you both end up in this position. Taking a scan of the room, the first thing you noticed was all your clothes strewn across the floor and table. Clothes may not be the right word, just a pile of torn fabric at this point. Even her red dress, which had so much care put into it, suffered the same treatment. "Rarity's going to kill us..." Her angry posh accent is already ringing in your ears as you imagine the berating you're going to get later.
"Why do you care about what she thinks..."
Turning your head to the side, you faced Umbra, who now had one eye open. "Look who's awake now." Looking past her head, you check the time once more. 6:26
She leaned forward and licked your face, "How much... did I drink last night?" She mumbled, her eye closing.
"Too much, to the point where you clawed all my clothes off."
She chuckled, "Good..." Her arms squeezed you tighter, pulling your head to rest under her muzzle. "Now... rest my love..."
While her neck fluff was a good motivator to lull you back to sleep, you really had other things to do. So, with great reluctance, you pulled away from her. "As much as I would love to stay in bed all day, I sadly have work to do."
She squeezed you tighter, "Take a day off..."
"That's the problem, Umbra; I've already taken days off to help you move out. Anymore, and Davenport may have to reconsider my position." That last part was a lie; your boss stated that you can take as many days off as you want. Saying something along the lines of, 'Mares. Am I right? Of course, that was before he knew the ex-ruler of The Crystal Empire was your marefriend, you're sure that he wouldn't have said that if he had known.
She growled, "If that no good-AH!"
You stopped her soon-to-come tirade by scratching her ear that wasn't covered by the pillow. "Stop. It's too early to be angry. I'm also assuming you have a hangover, correct?" An abundance of 'ahh' and 'ooh' was her answer as you continued your scritching.
"I-I-mmm-sto-op-op-I-I-mmmmmm-grraaaaHH! I COMMAND YOU TO CEASE."
"Not until you get off of me."
Hearing your disobedience, she grabbed your hand and pulled you up against her. Seeing an opportunity, she snaked her other arm under you and wrapped tightly around your back, stopping any thoughts you even had of escaping. "I-I won't allow such acts; now, go to bed, my King." She sniffed your scalp and rested her muzzle on your hair. A satisfied smirk crossed her muzzle.
God dammit. "U-Umbra! Come on! L-Let go!" No matter how hard you pulled, her grip was just way too strong for your feeble human body. With a sigh, you resigned to your fate and stuck your nose back into her neck.
"There you go... submit to your Queen's warmth..."
You rolled your eyes and took a peek at the clock. 6:31
Fantastic. "If you want, I can bring you a glass of water. It'll help with the hangover."
She contemplated her answer with a small hum. "Hmmm... will my King try to run away? Leaving her Queen to suffer all alone in the cold?"
"Uhhh... no?"
"Your tone suggests otherwise... I'm fine where I lay..."
You blew a raspberry into her neck, which caused a small giggle. If you were going to be forced to stay in bed against your will, then you'd make her regret it. With her eyes closed, she didn't even see your hand lifting up before it suddenly attacked her exposed neck. With all your strength gathered in your palm, you gave her what she deserved...
Tickle tickle tickle tickle
Surprisingly, she kept a straight face. Her pride won't allow her to admit it, but she's probably the most ticklish pony you'll ever meet in your lifetime. During a particular grueling cooking session that involved her burning almost all the ingredients for a cake, you poked her hips playfully to lighten up the mood. What you didn't expect was for her to let out a yelp and drop the flour onto the floor. Using this forbidden knowledge, you glided down her neck and onto her hips to continue your escapade.
Finally, her facade broke, and she released her hold on you. "HEHEH-HAHAHA A-A-ANON S-STOP! THIS I-I-IS T-TREASON!"
With your newfound advantage, you gathered your strength and pushed her onto her back to continue the assault. "Heh, look who's on top now, my love." A response was not needed as her laughs answered for her. Grinning like a madman, you scooted down and started blowing raspberries all over her stomach while continuing the tickle session. Seconds passed by with her laughs not dying down in the slightest. Sensing the losing battle, she tried raising one of her arms to retaliate, but one good tickle under the armpit was enough to halt her efforts.
Seeing tears starting to form in her eyes, you decided that she had enough and quickly got off. Leaving the sputtering mare, you grabbed your boxers off the floor and threw them on. "Well honey. It was fun, but I need a shower."
She sat up, albeit shakily, "I... hah... I-I'll join you..."
"As long as you don't attempt to bring me into bed again, we can go take one together." With what just happened, you didn't expect her to do anything hasty, but you kept your guard up regardless.
One messy shower later, you were now sitting happily at your kitchen table with some toast in hand. Sitting next to you was an equally happy Umbra who munched on some oats while she read a newspaper. "It seems like we're still making the news, honey."
Leaning over, you rolled your eyes at the outlandish title and claims the press has made again. "Will they ever make a better title? I mean, come on, 'WILL THE TYRANT AND ALIEN OVERTHROW EQUESTRIA?' They're trying way too hard at this point."
You finished your last piece of toast and drank your coffee before standing up, "Anyways, my Queen. I'm going to work now; I'll bring back some of your favori—"
"—I'm coming with." She said while putting her bowl in the sink.
You looked up at her, "I uhh... sure? What are we missing? Some groceries?"
She looked away, "No... I've been thinking for some time, and I've come to the conclusion that I need an occupation to earn some bits. We used up all the crystals for our late-night escapade. With me living here now, I'm a burden until I can provide for the both of us."
"Hey. You're far from a burden... but I won't lie by saying we are getting low on bits..."
She moved closer, "I was... thinking if I can work alongside you... or maybe some other occupation you know of." She added on quickly. "Staying in the comforts of my abode is nice, but I would feel rather safe if I worked closer with... you."
I... make her feel safe? You reached forward to hold her hands. Davenport is looking for some new movers... maybe she can handle the heavy stuff? "I... I think I can make something work out. Let's talk to my boss." That warm feeling in your chest grew tenfold when a smile appeared on her face. Leaning up, you both met in the middle with a long passionate kiss, with your hands resting on her hips.
Ending the kiss with a smile on both of your faces, you opened the front door. The morning sun greeted you with its warm rays while ponies around you took the time to pause and stare. Some went on with their mornings while others gave a wave; only a few looked on with nervous glances. "Come on, my King, don't want to be late now, do we?" She said while walking ahead.
Shutting the door behind you, you sped up to the fast mare, "Hey! What's the rush? I guarantee that we're already late with the morning that we had. Besides..."
