"Hey everyone how are you all?"
"Good."
"Up to any fun or anything you want to talk about or?.."
"Nah."
"You- you're a writer on this site, how do you have such little to say, I'm inviting you to talk about yourself."
"Nah."
"I see that you have this hobby! What do you like about said hobby?"
No response.
"Okay..."
darf is one of the most visible authors on this site, and his story is known to many: built an audience by writing clop, was dismayed to find said audience wasn't interested in his more literary, less prurient pursuits. It was a hard lesson, but a good one to have learned, for the sake of us all. And then, three years ago, he took off.
It has never come up before, but I have a secret to share: Mr. Darf and Mr. Horse Voice happen to live relatively close together—within fairly easy driving distance.
The funny part is that he and I have never spoken, in person or otherwise. But just as I begin considering introductions, he melts down completely and vanishes from the Internet.
Fimfiction author darf has thousands of followers, but that might be because they mostly write clopfics. I don't see a lot of chatter about them on my feed and this is my second post on the topic.
darf lives with mental illness and is currently in jeopardy.
I'll be the first to admit that I'm not exactly an active user of this site. It's often enough that I wish I were. Unfortunately, real life tends to eclipse my pony writing projects, though I hope to get some more content up on FiMFiction before the end of the year, at least. In the last couple of months, I have been absent entirely from this site. When I came back, I found that the prominent writer darf had left again, and taken his stories with
darf recently made public that he is also NTSTS, so I can finally show you this tree I made using stylo back in 2014 of some fimfic authors:
Look closely at the darf / NTSTS entries:
I uploaded four songs I had laying around, because why not.
https://soundcloud.com/greymusic-1/you-can-take-me-anywhere
https://soundcloud.com/greymusic-1/video-game-beats
If you seriously thought blocking me was going to silence me, boy you are wrong. I've only known about you for about a week or two and holy crap I could not believe all the lies and the promises you're breaking, but what transpired in the last few hours, I feel, pretty much sums up who you are.
https://web.archive.org/web/20160722063329/https://www.fimfiction.net/user/darf
Ladies and Gentlemen, darf is back from his very short hiatus and has done three things on the site that speak for themselves.
I'm going to start off this year with drama! Well, drama that's been over with for months now. I couldn't find a working copy of the story (you'll find out why, below), so I compromised.
Without further ado, let's get on with 2017! Imagine the possibilities below the break.
when your story gets good views, but the like/dislike ratio is almost exactly even
that's 'darf energy'
it would be cool to review video games semi-professionally. we think we will make that a goal for this year.
here is our list of goals so far. some of these may or may not be able to accomplish within an infinite time frame.
Hello. Today our landlady had a psychotic episode and locked us out along with most of our things. We are on a public starbucks wifi for the next two hours. If you are able to help us with a place to stay the night or other help somehow please message us. That's all for now. Sorry.
UPDATE 2:
https://www.twitch.tv/greymusic_/v/79751877
He admits to having $1200 in the bank just after the 20 minute mark. You can thank The Abyss for helping me out with this one.
PS: Oh and the context is that he's not going to spend it on rent but rather just for his own personal gains.
If the link above doesn't work, here's a Youtube one.
https://youtu.be/Xc2dF8BtlQ8
UPDATE 1:
Well it seems like the mods had enough of darf's bullshit.
first, that's a metaphor. i am not dead, and i am feeling surprisingly non-suicidal, so take that as you will.
over the last few days i reached out to what i hope are all my commissioners, offering them full refunds on their purchases. i won't share any more details about that here, other than to say it's something that i can't really afford but am hoping to sort out through various means.
Q: HOLY SHIT DARF IS THAT REALLY YOU?????
A: You know it, puddin' pop. Let's do hand stuff like the old days.
Q: Why aren't you on your old account?
A: This applies for all my accounts: I forgot the password, and I can't do Forgot Your Password because I sold my last email address to a phisher for food money. No, I lied, that money was spent on meth, not food. Don't worry, I've long stopped using it! I'm coping with heroin addiction though by smoking weed.
henlo everypony
around this time last year i emerged from the sightless goop of internet absenteeism and returned to my favorite website to write about ponies.
how have things gone since then?
well.
UPDATE 1:
Just as expected. It's a poser account.
The context? The real darf and The Abyss don't like each other very much. They had a very nasty spat and Abyss never agreed to edit any story of darf's. Nice work, m8.
SEPTEMBER 7TH, 2016.
He is indeed back.
https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/688594/so-lets-get-some-shit-sorted-a-useless-qa-based-off-questions-i-was-already-asked
A busy day today for people I follow – four new stories in my feed, from three different authors, including the long-absent Darf, who is oft spoken of in hushed tones, for fear that he might return if you said his name in front of a mirror three times.
Seems someone finally did. And so, I thought, what better way to welcome him back from two years of absence than to review two of his new stories?
I’m so sorry.
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