This story is a sequel to Error 503

Error 504: Gateway Timeout

A story was once told of a group of Anons displaced from reality. As their very existences needed a bit of time to re-calibrate, they found solace in the company of each other. However, unbeknownst to them, they were not the only ones experiencing a fatal, reality-ending error. For while they merrily gave each other silly names and drove themselves mad over the course of an excruciatingly long eight minutes, their wives were also having an accidental meet-up.

And it was much more awkward.

Error 503: Service Unavailable.

The fabric of reality is currently undergoing maintenance, leaving Anon, Anon, and... a lot of other Anons trapped in a white void. With no other ways to kill time, their only means of entertainment while they wait to be returned to their worlds is each other.

What do Anons even do in their spare time?

Celestia, Princess of the Sun and Princess of Equestria, has led a long life. She's made a lot of decisions, for good and for ill, and she's decided it's time to quit. Twilight Sparkle, her faithful student and fellow Princess, will assume the crown and rule Equestria in a month's time with the help of her friends. But before that can happen, Celestia has to host one last Grand Galloping Gala. She decided it would go out with a bang.

That was last night.

Today, the Princess awakens with a ring on her horn and a strange earth pony in her bathroom. She's hungover, and the pounding in her skull triggers some memories of events she pushed far out of her mind for many years. Because Princess Celestia wasn't always a Princess or even Celestia.

And her new husband won't stop running his mouth.

(Cover art by cadillac_dynamite.)

What do you do when your best friend licks your face out of nowhere? You lick back, obviously.

Cover done by IrradiatedPirateBooty.

Thanks to 6-D Pegasus for pre-reading.

Now with a reading done by Lotus Moon.

The princess just finished her last task for the day. Spike is out of the castle on an official errand. You know how to slip by the guards without drawing attention to yourself. Everything is falling into place.

You have business to take care of, but you'll have to do the unthinkable first: You have to kidnap Princess Twilight Sparkle.

Uhh... why?

Equestria is an old nation, and one that has had the luxury of the same, immortal, regime for centuries. While this has given them unprecedent stability, especially in a land that seeks to throw a world-ending threat at them every other Tuesday, it does come with a tendency for the rulers to not so much repeal laws as just ignore them and act as if they've been done away with already.

Most of the time, this works out just fine. Until another immortal--such as, say, a starving royal changeling looking for somepony to help her regain her strength--remembers these laws and invokes them to use to their own advantage. By arriving at Twilight Sparkle's castle and declaring herself a member of Twilight's royal harem.

And she's just the first.

Written on commission, for Spamotron, with money sent to a GoFundMe. If you'd like to commission me yourself, my rules are right here.
Also check out author Patreon and Ko-Fi.

Pinkie Pie is a great friend to everyone in Ponyville. That's just common knowledge. Even you, the resident human, aren't safe from her charm and enthusiasm. Over time, though, you've come to see her as more than just a friend. But considering how she greets everyone she knows with equal amounts of unbridled joy, you have no idea if you're as special to her as she is to you, or if you're just another name on a very long list of friends.

Your wife, the now-retired Celestia, has been acting strange lately. Tonight, she has something she needs to say, and the look on her face is all you need to know that it is important.

So important, in fact, that the trajectory of your lives hinges on your response.

While your thrill-seeking wife, Celestia, is a big fan of attractions like water coasters, you're a bit less excited by the prospect. Even still, you're pretty sure it will be a fun time. At least, that's what you thought until the coaster broke down with the two of you still on it. It doesn't help that waiting for the coaster to be fixed may take a bit longer than either of you had hoped.

And you having nothing to do in the meantime.

Rating and tag for scritch-based innuendo.

One day you were living an ordinary, dreary life. The next, you were in a magical world of friendship and ponies. Your new life took a lot of getting used to, but you eventually found happiness in your new friends, particularly the ruler of Equestria herself, Princess Celestia. Then one day, you found yourself somehow saving the world, and Celestia wanted to thank you by offering you one request. Feeling content with your life, you decide to make the best use of the request that you can think of by helping Celestia with whatever seems to be bothering her. But getting Celestia to open up to you about her troubles may be more difficult than you first imagined. Tea for two it is, then.