Everything has fallen apart for Scootaloo.

Her Cutie Mark will never come. The doctor said so. Her blood is just wrong.

As she stays in the Cutie Mark Crusader's Clubhouse, her friends show up. Now she has to explain that her crusade is over, and that there's even worse news.

Life as she knows it is over.

A/N: Kind of a sad story, with an upbeat ending. Listed as Slice-of-Life because it contains headcanon that makes some modicum of sense. Pretty light (Scoot's not even an orphan in this), and may have been done before, but this idea's been bothering me for too long, so here it is. Bonus points if you know what the title means. Avoid comments for massive spoilers, even if you do know what the title implies.

And yes, I do have some background in genetics, but I'm skimming it a bit for show feel.

Edit 28/7: Made the whole thing a little longer, and I think better in general. Hope you enjoy!

Watch out for the sequel, being worked on now.

A young Equestrian Guard recruit is ordered to attend - of all things - the retirement party of a complete stranger.

However, things at the party turn out to be not quite what he expected. As the night progresses, he learns some valuable lessons about himself and just what the duties of being a Guardspony in Her Eternal Princesses' Royal Guards entails.

(A slightly humorous yet slightly bittersweet look at the life and traditions of the Royal Guard)

As a cross-eyed mailmare, Ditzy Doo has had her fair share of accidents. Landing on roofs, through windows...you name it, it's happened. Despite all that, her job provides her with enough money to support herself and her daughter, Dinky. Dinky, however, seems to need something else, something her mother hasn't quite picked up yet.

A/N
DerpyMac shipping because why the hell not. I got the idea from Loyal 2-1 in one of his livestreams when he said he thought the best stallion for Derpy was Big Macintosh. His reasons for thinking this are irrelevant; Big Macintosh just has enough swag to attract about any mare...and a few stallions.
Also, I think the couple seems kinda cute.

Also, I refer to Derpy as Ditzy throughout the story. I'm fine with the name Derpy, but in my mind she would probably prefer being called Ditzy Doo.

Recently rewritten. Contains occasional adult humor and violence.
***
On a request from Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle and the rest of the mane six explore an abandoned mansion located deep in the woods. While doing so, they unwittingly stumble across an enchanted mirror that scrambles their DNA and pops out three brand new bouncing baby ponies. Hilarity and drama ensue as the mane six must cope with being suddenly thrust into motherhood, as well as protect their new foals from a dark god that wishes to use them for his own sinister gain.

***

Fanart:
The three foals. by Freefraq on Deviantart.

This story is a sequel to The Sisters Doo

Twilight Sparkle is a scientific pony. She understands things when they are explained.

Pinkie Pie is... uh... not a scientific pony. And she can't explain anything.

But there are secrets in the Wabe that Twilight needs to know, and only Pinkie has the answers.

A side-story to "The Sisters Doo".

Pinkie Pie throws excellent parties. This is a fact of life, like Fluttershy being rather demure, or Rarity having a sense of style. But the fact is, Pinkie's parties cost bits, and her job at the bakery isn't supporting her passions anymore. So she dusts off her degree and opens a side business...

This story is a sequel to Shadows of Canterlot

Join Trixie, agent of the Conclave – an elite and covert congregation of unicorns sworn to protect ponies from magic… and magic from ponies, sometimes!

Plot against unicorns and the magic itself thickens! After unfortunate events of the last Nightmare Night, Trixie’s pursuit after the mysterious cult continues. Will she be able to find an ancient artifact while seeking revenge herself? With an unlikely alliance she’ll forge, she might have that chance!

But there are battles that cannot be won by outstanding magic - ones that we fight with ourselves, ones that we fear to lose...

This story is a sequel to The Turning of the Screwball - The Strange Case of Button Stitch

Button Stitch has contained the chaotic creature inside her, and is taking her first unsteady steps into the realm of relationships. Davenport, the proprietor of Ponyville's premiere supplier of Quills and Sofas, is the object of her fancy, and he thinks she's pretty neat too. Can romance bloom between the two most aggressively boring ponies in Ponyville?

Of course it doesn't go well. Murphy was a pony.

Continued in Screwball Over

This story is a sequel to Screwball Mio Amoré

Several months ago, a strange little propeller beanie dropped out of the sky and landed in an abandoned field outside Ponyville. The ponies went about their lives, blissfully unaware of what lurked underneath, until today...

Button Stitch is an excessively regular mare with excessively regular habits, but something strange has begun to happen to her in the wake of Discord's rampage. Can Rarity and the rest of the girls get to the bottom of the strange manifestations of nonsense that have been plaguing Ponyville?

Continued in Screwball Mio Amoré