• Member Since 5th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Yesterday

thewaffler


T

Rainbow Dash while hanging out with her friends is asked, how she was able to afford her cloud mansion. Rainbow's story turns out to be anything from typical.

A story of how a classic track from Mario Kart was built and the pegasus who built it. Mostly told from Rainbow Dash's perspective, like ninety percent with implied Dash Spike.

This story was gonna be really innocent, but the alcohol told me to do "things." Also it helps if you picture Rainbow Road from Mario Kart DS.

Teen for suggestive themes and Strong Language.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 19 )

Not bad, but there was some spelling, grammar and punctuation problems here and there. Also, I'm fairly sure you have to mark as mature for sexual humour.

Just this.

>Silently expecting discussion about which rainbow road was best.

Very amusing and orginal and fun.

I think Rainbow's casual cursing takes away from the quality. Perhaps mixing in some pony-censors like "buck" or "horse-apples" would soften that effect.

The sex jokes seem a bit forced in places, though the crack at fluttershy almost made me choke on my beer from laughter.

Overall, a few things to improve on but all in all a good read. You get a thumb up.
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1952225
Double-Dash has best Rainbow-Road.

(Joke) Alt. Title: What A Rainbow Load

and Twilight said in a confused tone, "I don't get it." :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: of course you don't twilight. :rainbowkiss: the one thig that i find strange, is how come she didn't tell any of her firends about this when it first happened. I mean, isn't that the sort of thing that classes as 'big news?' :rainbowhuh:

I always found Rainbow Road to be one of the hardest tracks, especially when the computers are at their hardest and/or playing on mirror mode. I think I preferred the the Rainbow Road from Double Dash. fun, but hard. Interesting concept you have here, and I think I see what happened in the end. Rainbow Dash hit an item block, and whatever she got hit Lyra. which idea was it that hit Lyra? it was probably one of the shells, but which type? Great story:pinkiesmile:, but I do have one more question. Who is this GAmE MASTER supposed to be?

1952603 I think this was intended to happen before she met her friends. Plus,if she told them right away, they would have believed her to be crazy and she might not have her friends. The conversation came when they were hanging out, so it would have had to wait anyway. That i what it seems like to me, anyway.:twilightsheepish:

1952210

Nope, because no sex actually happened in the story. As for the grammar *shrug* nobody's perfect. :twilightsheepish:

1952225

Yeah, F-Zero always had some of the best sound tracks, I can't tell you how much time I wasted playing it at my buddy's house and as for Rainbow Road, I love The DS version of the track the best in terms of overall design, but in terms of complexity I'd give it to Mario Kart 7.

1952450

As for the swearing, I can't stand the term buck used as a replacement for "fuck," bucking is what Applejack does to pay the bills, the word has too much of a positive connotation to it. My friends that are into sports, hell most athletes in general tell the dirtiest jokes.

1952651

Captain N: The Game Master was a cartoon used by Nintendo to sell their products in the late 80's/early 90's. It's about this teenager named Kevin who gets stuck in a place called Videoland where he, and grossly horrible versions of Kid Icarus (annoying and attaches "-icus" to the end of every other word), Simon Belmont (fruity and vain), Mega Man (midget that talks like Popeye). They do battle with Mother Brain from Metroid, King Hippo from Punch Out and Eggplant Wizard from Kid Icarus. The show was horrendous, but at least nowadays you and a couple of friends can find it and rift on how much it sucked balls and get a couple of cheap laughs.

The joke was that the opening Narrator in the intro pronounced Game Master like Gay Master, by not pronouncing the "m"
.

1952841 That is interesting. I have never heard of it, but it does sound terrible. He made Rainbow Road the way it is, so he is not all that bad, but trying to for blaming Rainbow Dash for his makeovers in order to get her in trouble makes him EVIL.

Your grammar and formatting are all over the place, but the ideas are great. Uh, yeah.

1952948
The grammar, I'm not the best in hat department and as for the formatting, I was having a difficult time trying to figure out how to show the parts where Dash's friends interrupt the story, so I bolded and indented that text.

Lium #13 · Jan 13th, 2013 · · 1 ·

1952841

Sexual humour and references still counts, even if it isn't explicit. And while no-one's perfect, you can still make an effort. Casual disregardance lowers your work and belittles your attempts, but hey, if you want to seem lesser than you are, who am I to stop you?

Wow, I didn't expect this... points for originality and bringing up The Lost Vikings. :pinkiehappy:

Also what is Codex Ebony? :rainbowhuh:

Two misspellings caught my attention:
1.

The six element barriers were having another picnic by Rainbow Dash's House, Spike would have been there, but someone has to do the whole town librarian job.

Supposed to be bearers.
& 2.

"I am King Bowser lord of the Kompa Empire."

Supposed to be Koopa.
You might want to fix that.:ajbemused:

1958901

Thank You, out of all the people mentioning the spelling mistakes at least you pointed them out, instead of just saying there are mistakes. :twilightsheepish:

think you could let up on the swearing a bit. While it works in certain situations, in casual conversation it just gets old very fast and kinda starts to lose meaning. otherwise it was an ok story.

Dash knew the perfect way to shut Twilight up, a little trick she learned from the Doctor.

The Doctor?!

I was actually thinking of doing something like this as My OC would build it for Dash as a gift. I'll read this to see if it can help.

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