Forced to Live in Peace

by frutineo

Chapter 1: Out of the Blue color of the Slips-pace Rupture.

Ok first things first, I need an editor and Proofreader before I can carry on with any more chapters, I apologize profusely for any and every error you encounter along the way, just PM me if you are an editor.

Forced to Live in Peace

Chapter 1: out of the Blue color of the Slips-pace Rupture.

TIME: DATE RECORD [[ERROR]] ANOMALY \Date Unknown\ On surface of flagship Ascendant Justice, in anomalous Slipspace bubble.

The newly formed Blue team was taking heavy fire from the invisible covenant soldiers just outside the now human commandeered ship “Ascendant Justice” trying to repair the damage some saurian aliens caused.

Then as if out of nowhere, one of the plasma streams that the Smart A.I. Cortana had fired in hope of defending the ship bounced and it was going straight at the them.

Spartan Anton-044 could feel the heat of the plasma stream; it was unbearable and it’s radiation sent most of the systems of his MJOLNIR mark V suit out of control, his suit self-compensated for a drastic and false change in gravity and pressure, Anton passed out, he could feel speeding away from the Covenant – Human hybrid ship and then darkness reigned.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Celestia’s mornings where always busy; first was her breakfast with her sister Luna, for which it meant dinner (being the regal sisters of the sun and the moon respectively meant that their work times kept them apart for most of the days).

After the meal it was almost like clockwork, dealing with politicians of the cities of Equestria, countries from outside Equestria, visiting other areas outside her palace, it all seemed so boring the best part was that from time to time her faithful student Twilight Sparkle would sent to her a letter, this day however something was wrong as she suddenly felt a great rip of energy appeared high in space.

Luna felt it as well, it was as if a sun had ignited then disappeared all of the sudden, moments later both sisters transported themselves to outer space covered in a magic bubble containing oxygen for their survival, being alicorns gave them an edge above most unicorns as their magic power near impossible to match.

“Luna what are you doing up so late?”

“The same reason as you are here and not on a meeting Tia” Luna made a pause to look at their surroundings “This anomaly woke me from my slumber, it is like nothing I have ever felt before”

“I agree Luna, It is quite strange… would you like to come with me and investigate?”

“With pleasure” with that both princesses started reaching for the place they felt the strange source of energy came.

Princess Luna noticed something in the distance. “It seems that there is some sort of wreckage over there, let us go and see if we can find some answers around here”

As Celestia tried to close in the foreign objects Luna stopped her by crossing her foreleg in front of her “Luna? Is there a problem?”

“Sister I sense something wrong, this place reeks of some kind of energy unknown to us and I am not sure if it is dangerous”

Celestia concentrated her magic and saw that her sister was right there were remnants of some substance and energy floating from within, though little did remain of both she decided to let Luna shove it aside with her magic. “What an odd looking debris Luna and look, these appear to be some form of armored creatures, this 4 have what seems to be limbs it seems that their body shape is like that of Spike 2 arms and 2 legs”

Luna nodded in agreement. “Indeed sister, those 2 in blue armor appear to be of different species as they have 3… claws they seem weird; I take it that the ship is theirs as their armor has the same sleek design, it could have be a means of transportation”

The old covenant transport ship was floating out of control, almost out of shape the only thing remaining mostly intact was the cockpit. The princesses looked inside it and inside were the remnants of an alien mostly charred on one side.

“Luna maybe you are wrong, it seems the one inside is different it has 5 claws this might be the ship from the green ones even if their clothing is different”

“Maybe I am wrong but it could also be that this was stolen from them, either way we must clean this wreckage from here, the astronomers must have noticed and I bet your student did as well, I propose taking the corpses and give them a funeral pyre and bring the objects so we can study them”

A green flame and smoke appeared swirling from thin air and after disappearing it created a scroll. “I bet she wants to see if you know anything about the sudden lights in the sky”

“You are mostly right Luna” The regent of the sun told her sister. “She actually felt the surge of energy I am shocked she could feel it as well”

“I am actually shocked that she took so long to write you about it, you seriously need to give her more credit”

“You are right, she is the element of magic, her power will only grow in time and it is fitting that she can feel energy fluctuations this early in life”

With than both princesses divided the bubble, Luna took the remnants of the ship while her sister took the four creatures as they teleported back to the castle to one of the underground rooms.

“Well Tia I’m quite tired I will make way to my chambers”

“Good night Luna, maybe when you wake up Twilight will be here at the castle”

“You are calling her here?”

“Why not? She is a gifted scholar and my student. I am sure she will be delighted to study these specimens and you will be able to greet her, how does that sound?”

“Magnificent Tia, now I’m off to sleep. Bye!” with that she disappeared in a dark bubble.

Princess Celestia on her part locked the doors and stationed a couple of guards outside the chamber.

Moments after she left one of the green armored creatures started regaining consciousness.

Comments

[Anonymous_AiE]

Seems interesting. I'll be following this.

[James Vivien]

Writing seems a little clunky, but I've read much worse. I'll follow and see where it goes, but it feels a bit off as of now.

[BronzeFog]

MOAR, MOAR I SAY

[fabianguzman18]

What about Warrant Officer Polaski and Li-008?

[Warbozz Choppa]

Am oi da only wun dat sees a pattrn ere? It goez summin loik dis:

Rite a Halo fik
Evvrywun luves it

At no point do ya need ta be gud at writin.

[master109]

wow a story a story with Anton-044 never thought i'd see the day

[Archmagejay]

Intriguing I shall be following this closely... but please don't bring the war to equis because that would be really really chèche...

1549598
GO AWAY YOU BOT!!!

[Slaughterstone]

1550335 I have never seen one of those on here before. Do they show up often?

[Archmagejay]

1550446
Not too often, I've only seen about 5 of them in the last 4 or so months... So yeh

[Cheer]

1. Clunky and rushed. Princesses seemed to make quite a few quick and (possibly) overly accurate assumptions. The fact they wore armor and that it wasn't their skin. their quickness in figuring out they were bipedal. the fact they figured out it was a ship and then said it may be a form of transportation. They don't even know of space travel (well Luna does pretty well but it's not like she wanted to go all Armstrong on Equestrias moon. Cause I mean even if they are in space they still have no where near the tech for actual travel through the stars and their bubble of oxygen would eventually run out.) and the closest thing they have for air travel are open air carriages and hot air balloons. Just saying.

2. Give a bit more in the open to get us to start to understand what exactly is going on here before the crash. Maybe throw in some dialogue. Even just an uttered curse. Even something this small could tell us a bit about he himself.

My Little Qualms

Twilight Sparkle would sent to her a letter

- Twilight Sparkle would send her a letter

could have be a means

- Could have been a means

sister was right there

- Sister was right. There

shape is like that of Spike 2 arms and 2 legs”

- Somehow I doubt she would immidietely associate their body type with a specific creature like spike. Maybe an association with a Minotaur or dragons in general?

YBG Out -

[frutineo]

1548944 1549277 1550678 1550335 1550146

Ok time for some answers:

First of all thanks for giving some of your time to look at this particular story some of you have pointed out some... grammar errors and the presence of bad writing now let me clarify this.

I have had this particular story kept in my folder for over a year now and I though it was due time to see if it passed moderation and as you might have noticed I posted it without some sort of proof reading or edition of sorts thus it looks clunky.

This is also from were I was starting to write and even though I managed to change in a year I am still a Mexican Brony that can speak English way better than I can write so I apologize for my errors I will try to make up for it in the near future.

That said I want to clarify that Equestria is NOT in the same dimension Anton Comes from and thus the human covenant war will never land in the actual story neither the alliance the humans and elites made after the betrayal of the prophets I will add more characters who were lost in the halo universe with a plausible explanation of how they arrived but just a few.

Lastly I killed Li because my initial thoughts were to make the Spartans and covenant survive and be forced to live a life in the same country but I saw that only the Spartans have armours that would allow the to survive in space after their shields are down and with that in mind I changed the story so only Anton would have survived.

All of that I wrote it down on October last year and I have kept it hidden in my laptop until now.

Hope you can wait for more and I shall address any other questions you might have at a latter date.

[Anonymous_AiE]

1551160

I read 150k words a day of fanfiction but i swear you deleted 3 or 4 chapters.

[RapTions]

reads a little to scripted and not like actual events like they are the narrator and now what is going to happen, she calls it a ship and then points out that it may be a form of transportation, she calls them bodies when they could have been animatrons or magical golems, not a bad premise but remember the charaters are not you so ty not to write them as if they already know what is going to happen k

[Cirrus_Brony]

I like!
I read that you need a proof reader and editor... I will be happy to help!! I have edited five other stories before. Well you can private message me or reply to this post if you want me to help! Thanks.
So anyway I liked the storyline. Only a few minor mis-wordings and rushing sentences, but minor edits can fix that. But I think you have talent. Seems your more targeted towards oral storytelling if I may assume that. With some practice you will get much better!

Well thanks for this nice first chapter and consider my offer about editing for you! My email is on my profile page.

[Torindelluna]

Expand, expand, expand. great potential but it's a little rushed. Slow down, develop the story. Will watch for great justice!

[Tofty]

If I had the time I would edit for you, but unfortunately a lot of my time is dedicated to my A-Levels...

Nonetheless, I see that this story has potential but is definitely rough around the edges, if you find an editor to clean this up it will be a lot better, but you should also try to expand the story a little, don't just have him rushed to Equestria immediately - slow it down a little.

I noticed you said this has been in your folder for over a year, so you've improved in your writing. This is obviously great, because as much as I hate to say it, this story feels a little like it was written by a primary school child, but I also have to factor in that English isn't your native language.

To sum up, clean it up a bit and expand. Cirrus_Brony said he'd be your editor anyway, so I'd definitely take him up on that!

[1st Lieutenant Dave]

nice story