Avatar: The Last Alicorn. Book 1: Pegasus

by Jeweled Pen

Spoiler: Book 2

The sun slowly rose into the sky as the moon dipped back behind the mountains. Its glow rapidly spread across the land, awakening all manners of animals as its warmth alerted the world to the beginning of a new day.

The light quickly found its way to a large floating city, built on top of the clouds that hovered above an even larger walled city. Ponies ran about doing their daily tasks, be they working on homes, planting food, moving the clouds about or even practicing their air bending. A slight distance from the city a small course of obstacles, including a miniature cyclone, blizzard and a flurry of electricity-filled rain clouds, was stationed. A pegasus wearing a blue skin tight suit with yellow lightning bolts gazed at a clip board. She also had an orange and yellow mane. She was Spitfire, of the wonderbolts.

“Okay everypony!” she called out towards a small group of pegasi in similar outfits. “You all know why you're here. Most of you have spent the last month recouping after the Water Nation's attack. As a matter of fact, everypony has been working their hooves to the bone!” The mare began to pace as the ponies nodded in unison. “That's why today is so important! They've only been here a short bit, but Chickenwings and her friends have been invaluable both morally and with the defense of the last bastion of air benders. It may be the last day of their stay, but we won't let them just fade out like a gentle breeze! We're going to throw them a real twister of a party!” the ponies cheered and jumped up and down on the clouds. “Not only that, we're going to show them just how much we appreciate what they've done for us. That's right...” she turned towards the cyclone as a grin crossed her lips. “We're going to send them through... the Wonder-maker.”

The gathered ponies gasped as one near the front let out cries of disbelief as he looked back and forth between the others. “Ih wha, uh, gwa, UWAA! WAAAA! WAAAA! Grggg... grgggllll...” he foamed at the mouth for a few moments before dropping in a faint.

“Yes yes. I know they've only been with us a single month. But they can handle it! They've already stood up against the best the Water Nation has to offer. After that, this'll be a piece of cake,” she said with a nod as she turned back towards them. “We need to have it ready first! Every pony, I need this moving fast, moving hard and down near the ground! There isn't a pony within ten miles who'd wanna miss this! Now break!” she yelled as the ponies let out a cheer and flew off into the air.

Author's Note:

Okay, I really should have done this ages ago, but it never occurred to me at the time. This is a small little spoiler for book 2, namely to alert everyone who favorited the first book and wasn't aware there was a second, that the second is out. Thanks.

Comments

[SkyPieIsTheBest]

AN AVATAR FIMFIC! OMG! (dies)

[Jeweled Pen]

4552350 No, don't die! Readdd! Read gosh darn it! :P

[SkyPieIsTheBest]

4554058 XD okay

[Jeweled Pen]

4555137 She makes the best toothbrushes.
4555583 That's because AJ is the Toph char. Book two. :)

[Alchemystudent]

Wait, the water nation is evil? Twilight is the firebender? Ok...you have my attention! Lets see where this takes me

[Jeweled Pen]

4562579 Hopefully to a land of awesomes! :D
4600989 I'd like to think so.

[Jeweled Pen]

4644874 Sweet. ^^ This is my biiiiig story. Large, fun and a tad bit unwieldy, but still good I hope. :)
4647683 Ayes, that's what I was going for. Avatar and Mlp are both so good that I knew a straight copy of it wouldn't do either justice.

[iamli3]

im gonna have to watch the show to understand what's going on here wont it?.....

[Jeweled Pen]

4654787 Not yet. :P
4795141 It doesn't hurt, but I don't think you absolutely have to.
4804861 Thanks ^^ I've tried really hard to make it as good as I could.
4810677 Actually, there was a rewrite about 8 months ago. About 32 weeks ago. I'll admit, this one kinda hurt, at first. However, I can understand you don't like it, that's fine. Not every story is for everyone and, when I first wrote this, I was a pretty bad writer. Luckily, I am developing and getting better. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy it, but I'm happy that a lot of people still seem to enjoy it. Thanks for taking the time to voice your opinion.

Sorry took so long to respond, everyone. I try, but I've been focusing a lot on keeping up the writing schedule. I assure you though, I do read every comment and take them to heart. Thanks for taking the time to post. :)

[Lord Death]

seeing the 3rd book via homepage...finding this one...."TIME TO REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!q!!!!!"!$!£e$g££"£$££ewre !"

[Smilekat]

I know this story was completed a long time ago, so this comment is kinda late, but I think it has a huge problem.

Namely, Twilight is to darn weak. I mean, the whole idea is she's going to save the world, but she seems to constantly fail and need rescuing from every opponent or fight she faces. I get that Twilight is an intellectual not a fighter, that she doesn't like hurting people, and that you don't want to make her to strong, but this is ridiculous, it just isn't believable that she'd be able to make a difference given how uttely helpless she is against everything. I am guessing the ending will involve the elements of harmony saving the world instead of her doing it alone, but she still should contribute something. At this point she only does anything with the avatar state, otherwise she almost never wins. And I get that there's often things stacked against her, like she'd wounded or her opponent cheats or whatever, but Aang frequently overcame the odds, and now its Aangs powers with Twilights mind, and she's as helpless as a kitten.

[Alcatraz]

5308057

Chickens...

[Alcatraz]

6475898 That's kinda what I meant...

[Blaster M]

This series was worth the read. Why doesn't it have more views?

[marinus18]

9657435
I'm not saying he is a saint or that he is completely right. I just said I can understand his frustration and that Twilight indeed is overstepping her authority. She might be a beginning alicorn but that should not mean she can just come into some village and push the leader aside like that.

[marinus18]

9721736
I actually meant it seriously. It wouldn't be why she was banished but it could still be part of her character.

[red reaper]

9824647
Okay thank you

[Mocha Star]

I Fucking love this and can't wait to read the rest.

[Jeweled Pen]

11325399
Hee hee, thanks. I like to think it only gets better, since I had learned a lot since then.

[Mocha Star]

11325555
You're right!

[TheCommunistDog]

Well 1 down 7 more to go. A second time…