LucidTech
Joined 30th Mar, 2012 ·
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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As someone's who's recently started coming to terms with being (non-sex repulsed) ace himself, this is pretty much the type of conversation I had with myself (rationale being "I have romantic and sexual thoughts, and I love people, but I don't have romantic and sexual thoughts about people"). It's not exactly the same (that kind of awakening is different for everyone), but it's still a story I clicked with. Very nice little story.
This sucked
11738624
Thank you very much for the comment!
I'm always happy to hear that a story I wrote mainly for myself also resonates with others.
11738776
Never know who else in the world might resonate with your story; I've been surprised by that fact myself a couple times.
11738630
Your comment sucks.
Lovely story!!
*Sigh* I see we have another victim of the all-too-common trend of... okay, I know the general term for what's happened here is 'review bombing', but that honestly doesn't feel like it truly captures how pathetic and childish this particular version of it is. It's needs another term, but I haven't been able to come up with anything satisfactory. 'Censure Tantrum', maybe? I was thinking about 'Dissy fit', but I feel like that's an insult to a good, well-crafted diss.
Well, despite what the babies downvoting everything think (assuming it is multiple people, which I have some doubts of but can't prove otherwise), I think this is a pretty nice story. Fairly basic, but it does what it needs to. Admittedly, the hug and nuzzle between the two was a little weird - I'm not sure if it was supposed to be platonic or if they were actually in a relationship of some sort. Not that it's an issue either way, but the fact it didn't come down one way or the other made that part of the interaction feel a bit strange. Still, that's a minor point.
The one thing I think is missing is distinct closure on Twi's 'I'm broken' sentiment. That's a distressingly common feeling for many coming to terms with their asexuality and one that needs to be dealt with and hopefully quashed as quickly as possible. However, while the story does bring it up, it doesn't really go anywhere with it and nothing really gets said that would actively dissuade Twilight of the notion. I get that the idea is that Twilight accepts herself at the end, but I don't really see the progression from self-reproach to acceptance. I think it's something that should have been brought up by the characters so that they could clear the air and help Twilight through those feelings. Admittedly, that might have extended the story more that you wanted, but I feel it would be an improvement.
Still, like the story overall and really, really hope you don't let the infantile screeching of dickheads get you down. I'm all for constructive criticism, but that whole thing is just puerile.
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Thank you for the constructive criticism, you raise valid points. As a mostly fluff piece on my part I mainly had beats I wanted to hit and didn’t string it together as well as I could have. In hindsight I definitely should’ve focused in on repairing the “I’m damaged” mentality instead of simply hitting it as a beat and moving on. A weakness of mine is not dwelling on moments, I tend a lot to roll on through.
The relationship with Tempest was meant to be affectionate, I feel like a lot of the time these stories tend to linger on the asexual party being alone and that always felt wrong to me. That said, despite being ace myself I do read a lot of romance and so I can see now that I might’ve gone too far in that direction as a result.
Thank you for taking the time to write out some constructive criticism for me, it does mean a lot. As for the dislikes, I’ve been here long enough that they’re mostly just humorous to me nowadays. A comment that simply says “this sucked” with no clarifying details is so pointless that it’s comedy and a bunch of people disliking without saying anything is even funnier to me.
woag this is so cool!
this was fact check by real equestrian horses: TRUE
I’m asexual. Feeling heard is nice.
It's always delightful to see ace characters (especially since ace characters can be rather rare, and I'm probably ace), and I quite liked this story. Have a lovely day.