My Little Pony: Friendship Blazes

Unicorns Twilight Sparkle and Sunset Shimmer are the star students of Princess Celestia but the almighty Princess has other plans in mind. She sends the two dragon companions, Spike and Jake to Ponyville, to oversee the Summer Sun Celebration but instead, the two will have adventures of a lifetime.

Chapters (4)

Prolouge-When Twilight met Sunset · 21st Oct 2023 · 1,002 words
1,002
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Chapter 1-From Dusk to Dawn Part 1 · 30th Nov 2023 · 4,296 words
4,296
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Chapter 2-From Dusk to Dawn Part 2 · 1st Dec 2023 · 4,517 words
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Chapter 3-The Ticket Problem · 3rd Feb 2024 · 5,134 words
5,134
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Comments ( 21 )

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Sudrian Engineer

Sudrian Engineer #1 · Oct 21st, 2023 · 1 · · Prolouge-When Twilight met Sunset ·

This seems really interesting, but the description confuses me a bit.

Do just Spike and Drake get sent to Ponyville, or do Sunset, Twilight, Spike, and Drake all get sent?

AvoidingFever17

AvoidingFever17 #2 · Oct 21st, 2023 · 1 · · Prolouge-When Twilight met Sunset ·

Oooh neat!

TasermonsPartner

TasermonsPartner #3 · Oct 22nd, 2023 · 1 · · Prolouge-When Twilight met Sunset ·

I know you used red-colored text to represent Sunset here, but since she was the only one speaking, and it was obvious that the one speaking was her, there really was no point. Additionally, red text is one of the hardest for humans to read for any length of time, since the eyes will naturally blur the red letters together.

My point is, you don't need to use colors to identify who is speaking, just for the sake of future chapters, and especially if you plan on using multiple colors for different characters in the same chapter; that's even worse on the eyes.

The actual content of the chapter was good though. Look forward to more!

Max Stroberger