August 31 – 9:02 PM
It had taken more than an hour, but Scootaloo and Apple Bloom ultimately prevailed in their attempt to lug the “borrowed” jackhammer back to the clubhouse. They had even managed to conceal it perfectly, assuming that nopony thought to peek underneath the threadbare tablecloth that covered a large, irregularly-shaped object leaning against the corner of the room. It felt like a superb end to a day of unusually productive crusading, an experience marred only by Sweetie Belle’s inability to escape from the attention of her mother so she could join them.
However, after Scootaloo departed from Sweet Apple Acres, there remained one final obstacle for Apple Bloom: getting back into her bedroom. Granny Smith knew dozens of aphorisms about the importance of a good night’s sleep for a growing foal, and experience had long ago taught her grandchildren that she believed every single one of them. Barring holidays such as Nightmare Night or the Summer Sun Celebration, a young filly had no business being out of bed at nine o’clock, at least as far as the old green mare was concerned.
Luckily for Apple Bloom, these days Granny Smith usually turned in even earlier than she did, leaving the enforcement of her rules to Big Macintosh and Applejack, who were conveniently spending the evening assisting the weather team. Thus, all she had to do was carefully and quietly make her way through the darkened farmhouse and slip beneath the covers, and Granny Smith would be none the wiser.
Not only was this a reasonably well thought-out plan, but to Apple Bloom’s mild surprise, it seemed to work. Granted, there were a few close calls: the filly had to bite her lip to keep from shouting after banging her shin into a wayward ottoman, and she nearly fell over from shock when she accidentally put all of her weight onto the super-creaky step at the top of the staircase, but Apple Bloom soon found herself in the safety of her room. She walked over to her bed as quietly as she could, pulled back the covers...
...and then the lights turned on.
“Back in my day, we were smart enough ta put pillows under our blankets so it looked like we were sleepin’ already.” Apple Bloom swallowed hard before turning around to face the source of the raspy, sardonic advice. Granny Smith’s face looked even more wrinkled than usual as she glared at her granddaughter. “You’ve got some explainin’ ta do, missy.”
August 31 – 9:06 PM
Fluttershy’s wings were painfully sore by the time she landed at the entrance to the Ponyville Hospital. They’d never hurt this badly before, not even when she was training for Tornado Day. However, she didn’t have time to indulge in such speculation; she had to find out what was happening. Upon questioning the receptionist about Flitter’s location, Fluttershy rushed down the hallway at a near gallop. She might have passed the Intensive Care Unit altogether had she not collided with with Rainbow Dash, who was pacing outside the door, still in her reflective fog suit. The rather distressed-looking weatherpony seemed ready to unleash a string of foul language at whatever blockhead had crashed into her, but this changed the instant she recognized her friend.
“Fluttershy! Just the mare I wanted to see. Did Thunderlane fill you in on the details?”
The yellow pegasus didn’t answer right away; she was too busy catching her breath to form any intelligible words. Eventually, though, she managed to reply, “Well, I didn’t stick around to ask him questions, but I think Thunderlane said something about Flitter being set on fire....”
“Er, that’s sort of overstating it a bit. What happened is that Flitter unzipped her fog suit too early and got pushed into the bonfire.”
“Oh no!” Fluttershy gasped, turning white as a sheet. “Into the bonfire? That’s... I mean, is she— will she be okay?”
Rainbow Dash held up her hoof to calm her friend down. “Don’t worry, Fluttershy. The staff here says she should be fine. Only her coat, mane, feathers, and, like, the top layers of skin in a few places got burned. Doc says that between magic spells and maybe a graft or two, she should make a full recovery. I don’t blame you for being worried, though. It could have been a lot worse. When I say she got pushed into the fire, I really mean that the fog slammed Flitter against the burning pieces of wood, but her momentum kept her moving until she hit the ground on the other side of the pit. Now, if she’d landed in the hottest part of the fire instead of simply being chucked through it, the doctor says that would have been really bad.”
Fluttershy didn’t particularly want to think about what the hospital staff would have considered “bad,” so she decided to keep focusing on the positive. “So, Flitter should be back on her hooves in no time, then.”
“Uh....” Rainbow Dash’s noncommittal groan as she scratched the back of her head soured Fluttershy’s mood almost immediately.
“What else happened?” Fluttershy asked, preemptively wincing at the forthcoming prognosis.
“Well, it’s not too serious,” Rainbow Dash said. “It’s just that saying she’ll be ‘back on her hooves’ isn’t really the best expression to use.”
“She’s paralyzed?!”
“What? No! She broke one of her hind legs when she hit the really thick pieces of firewood that were holding the rest of the bonfire up. Fractured tarsus—I had one of those when I was a filly. I was trying to see how fast I could fly backwards and that stupid mountain jumped right in front of me. Uh, I mean, behind me.”
Fluttershy sighed. “Okay, so moderate burns, and a broken leg.”
“Uh, two, actually. When she hit the ground, she landed on her forelegs badly. I mean, she broke her left front cannon, but she also dislocated it, and it was one of those really nasty compound ones where you can see the bone. I mean, it’s like somepony just shoved her hoof to the side, but her cannon stayed where it was, and it broke through—”
“Okay, I get the idea,” Fluttershy said, cutting off her friend before her description could get even more graphic. It wasn’t that she was a stranger to severe injuries; she’d had to transport a few of her animal friends to the local veterinarian after they’d been injured in the Everfree Forest, and the sights could occasionally be quite gruesome indeed. However, she was fairly certain that, as the pony nominally in charge of the situation, it was not worth risking the chance that other ponies might view the contents of her stomach. “But one way or another, Flitter’s going to be okay, right?”
“Physically, sure. Financially, however... uh, well that depends.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, she’s going to need surgery to get all her bones back where they’re supposed to go, and obviously she won’t be able to work while she’s recovering. Thing is, it’s kind of questionable whether this would normally be covered as a work injury, since she was doing something she’d been told not to do...” Rainbow Dash looked rather nervous as she described her subordinate’s plight, and it took Fluttershy a few seconds before she realized why her friend was having difficulty making eye contact.
“Do you need me to authorize something?”
The weatherpony’s eyes brightened immediately. “Yes! Um, I mean, if you think it’s, you know, justified, and stuff.” Rainbow Dash tried her best to look disinterested in the situation, but her efforts were betrayed by the way she was rapidly shifting her weight from hoof to hoof. “Don’t get me wrong,” she hastily added when she saw the look of concerned skepticism on her friend’s face. “There’s nothing shady about this. It’s just standard DOW procedure to make this sort of thing a judgment call on the part of whoever’s in charge. Usually, that’d be me, but you’re overseeing all of this. So, um, what’s your take on it?”
Fluttershy smiled as she made what might have been the first truly easy decision she’d encountered all day. “Of course it was a work-related injury. Should we head back to the library to see if Pencil Pusher has the forms with him?”
“No need. I’ve already filled out most of it,” Rainbow Dash replied, producing a thick sheaf of papers. “Just sign, here, here, here, initial here, and sign and date there.”
“You filled all of this out while I was on my way to the hospital?”
“Yeah, I kind of have a lot of practice filling out this form,” the weatherpony replied sheepishly as she started blushing through her blue coat.
Fluttershy sighed. “Do you have a pen?”
August 31 – 9:07 PM
There are times in every politician’s career when she must make hard decisions, risking the support of her constituents as she weighs mutually contradicting options against each other in an effort to determine the best course of action. Fortunately for Pinkamena Diane Mare’s efforts to snag the Royalist Party’s nomination in the next parliamentary election, this was not one of those times.
“Um, Auntie Diane?” Pinkie Pie asked as she stood next to the Mayor of Ponyville.
“Yes, Pinkie?” Mayor Mare said, not taking her eyes off the sight before her.
“Why did you climb all the way up here to stare at the fog?” The two of them had been standing on the mountain, observing the wayward weather formation as it ebbed and flowed in the moonlight for nearly ten minutes.
“Because the press is watching,” the Mayor replied, subtly jerking her head behind her. “Don’t look at them,” the earth pony quickly added before her niece could crane her neck to observe the journalists. Most of the reporters had already left to either start writing their articles or to continue their research, but several photographers had stayed behind to get some photo-ops, and Mayor Mare wasn’t about to turn them away. “We don’t want them to know that we’re talking about them.”
“Oh, okay,” Pinkie said. “So, um, why am I here?”
“You’re working with Fluttershy. If we’re talking together while we look at the fog, they’ll think I’m getting important information. It’s what’s expected of a leader.”
This didn’t make much sense to the pink party guru. “But you aren’t doing any leading. Fluttershy is.”
“That won’t shield me from criticism if I don’t look like I’m doing something.”
This didn’t sound very sensible to the pink earth pony, who scratched her head in mild confusion. “I just don’t understand politics, I guess. I mean, there’s supposed to be two really big parties, but neither one seems to care about pin-the-tail-on-the-pony, or musical chairs, or charades.”
“Oh, there’s plenty of charades going on,” the Mayor replied with a smirk.
“But I’m talking about the kind where ponies try to act out phrases written on pieces of paper. Those are the boring kind where ponies are trying to convince other ponies that they’re doing something even though they aren’t really doing anything. You know, like you’re doing right now.”
Mayor Mare was glad that she wasn’t facing the reporters at that moment, because her rather massive wince would have certainly piqued their interest in a less-than-desirable fashion. “Sadly, the downside of entering politics is that you often need to play games that aren’t very fun,” she eventually answered.
The conversation abruptly petered out at this point, mostly because Pinkie Pie was never particularly keen to discuss not having fun. After a few minutes of silence, she tapped her aunt on the shoulder. “Hey, Auntie Diane? The reporters have gone.”
The Mayor turned her head and saw that this was indeed the case. “I see. Well, I suppose they have deadlines to meet, and let’s be honest: Fluttershy is the pony they’ll want under a microscope.” She began walking back towards town, with her energetic niece following her lead a few seconds later.
“A microscope?” Pinkie asked as she caught up to her aunt. “Are they going to get some unicorns to shrink her?”
“I was speaking figuratively, dear,” the Mayor replied, peering over her spectacles at the ball of energy bouncing beside her.
“Aw, I hate figures of speech,” the ball said weakly, looking slightly deflated. “They always get my hopes up for something really neat, and then I end up disappointed when it’s something boring.” Pinkie’s gait slowed to a walk before she spoke again: “Um, Fluttershy’s going to be alright, isn’t she?”
The Mayor didn’t quite know what to make of this. “What do you mean, Pinkie?”
“Uh, well, I was just thinking...”
“Yes?”
“Fluttershy’s the one making all the hard decisions, right?”
“Obviously,” the Mayor answered with a small nod as she narrowly avoided tripping over an exposed tree root in the middle of the trail.
“Well, does that mean that she’s going to be criticized for it?”
The older mare sighed heavily before returning her attention to Pinkie Pie. “After she blew off that press conference? I’d say it’s pretty much inevitable. The only question is whether anypony will come up with a reason to be really nasty about it.”
August 31 – 9:12 PM
Derpy Hooves hated working the telegram kiosk. Naturally, she didn’t mind delivering the assorted messages that were telegraphed to Ponyville from all over Equestria—that wasn’t all that different from the parcel delivery service that The Pony Express had originally hired her to do. But having to spend hours behind a desk taking messages from customers, converting them into Horse Code, and then sending them off towards their destination was just plain dull, especially since few ponies needed PonEx’s telegram services at night in a town as small as Ponyville.
Derpy’s lazy eye drifted around the room as she rapped her hooves on the counter to simulate the sound of a gallop. Ordinarily, she would have been home this evening, but she had been called in to cover for the usual kiosk worker, who’d been called away by some big to-do that apparently required the participation of all the pegasi on the reserve weather team. The grey mare hadn’t asked for any more information, as she’d been too preoccupied attempting to find a last-minute sitter for her unicorn filly, Dinky. It just wasn’t fair. She had to sit in an otherwise empty room, while Flitter was probably having lots of fun and feeling really important at that very moment.
She was just about to pull out the copy of Daring Do and the Secret of Shetlan-Da she had stashed underneath the counter when her boss was looking the other way, when the sound of a bell over the front door alerted her to the presence of a potential customer. Derpy sat up as straight as she could and put on the most pleasant smile she could manage. “Welcome! How can I help you?”
The customer was a red pegasus stallion with a baseball for a cutie mark and a singularly disgruntled expression on his face. “I need to send a telegram to Cloudsdale. Rush delivery. Does this podunk town have the facilities for that?”
“Um, no, our office in Podunk only offers parcel delivery. But you won’t have to send it through there. We have a telegraph line directly to the Cloudsdale ground office!”
The stallion rolled his eyes. “So that’s a ‘yes,’ then?”
“That’s right, Mr...”
“Hard Hitter. I’m a journalist for the Cloudsdale—” Hard Hitter stopped himself right before he said “Cloudsdale Eye,” mostly because it was here that he noticed that only one of Derpy’s was pointed in his direction. “Uh, I mean, I work for the largest news gathering organization in Cloudsdale.”
“A journalist? Wow, they pay you to write a diary?”
It was a good thing that Hard Hitter wasn’t drinking anything at the moment; if he had, it probably would have ended up all over Derpy. “What? No! I write articles for the E—er, the newspaper.”
“Oh! So, you’re a reporter, then.”
“I am a journalist.”
“You are? So, what, are you saying that the diary thing is something you do on the side?”
“I don’t write a diary!”
“But you said you were a journalist...”
“Argh! Never mind. I’ll be sending that telegram to Cloudsdale now, if you please.”
“Okay!” Derpy said with a cheerful smile. “What’s the name of the recipient?”
“Greg.”
“Oh, is he a griffon?”
“No, he’s a pony. More specifically, he’s a friend of mine who’s well placed in the Department of Weather.” Hard Hitter looked especially smug as he said this. Apparently, he thought that his source in the DOW would impress the mare.
“Um... okay. What’s your message?”
“Calling in favor, stop. Suspect fog specialist’s qualifications, stop. Could be big, stop.”
After Derpy had read the message back and the stallion had paid his three bits for rush delivery service (grumbling all the while about overpricing), Hard Hitter left the PonEx office, and the mare got to work preparing the message for transmission. “Dash-dot-dash-dot, dot-dash, dot-dash-dot-dot...”
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Are those comments from one of your prereaders at the end? I think you forgot to delete them...
2661405 - Yes, they were. I forgot that GDocs doesn't remove comments unless you mark them as resolved, even if you can't see the comment in question anymore.
looks like you copied the comments of the story/skype chat or something at the end there! quick, edit!
edit: nevermnid XD
Er, wait, Fluttershy did complete the course, right? What's the issue here?
Possibly fraudulent qualifications, possibly fraudulent workers comp paperwork, this could go badly for Shy.
Hard Hitter, you are going to REGRET sending that Telegram after you find out that the reason Fluttershy Abruptly ended the Press Confrence was to tend to a CRITCALLY INJURED worker on HER WATCH.
Question, why was Derpy not called up with the other Pegisi? I know she could be considered a walking/flying disaster, but if they needed every member of the team she is also a reservist, so shouldn't she have called up as well?
Sorry, why this story was interesting, but up until the fog got stopped and I found out every pony was okay... I just lost interest. It was a great story though.
2661549
Who says they are safe? Just because the fog is stopped right now doesn't mean it is going to stay stopped. And Fluttershy still has her fear of the ERS to deal with. So there is still plenty of stuff that could go wrong.
2661577
I realise this, and maybe it's me just being tired considering I haven't slept at all and it's now 5 am but I've just lost interest.
2661526
The text says only Pegasi called were the ones on the Reserve Weather team, which I assume Derpy isn't a part of.
2661549, 2661577 - That's one way to think of it. Another is that this is construction grade cloud, which means it isn't going away anytime soon, and it's parked right over the Equestria's rock farming region. Even if rock farming doesn't require sunlight, it's going to be difficult to get anything done under the constant threat of hypothermia.
But of course, that's assuming that the entire fog bank has stopped moving, and not just the southern edge that was exposed to the bonfires....
2661730
If we go by normal cannon then she should be. She was shown helping Rainbow Dash before. And before it comes up I know she isn't a normal weather member, but I figured she was a reservist.
2661770 - But would she have been kept on reserve after the incident with the Town Hall?
2661781
We never heard that she wasn't. But I will agree that she probably would have made things worse, its just that if you say they needed everypony then you would think they called on everypony.
This is just me being a stickler for details though. Not a serious complaint.
Is Hard Hitter even going to find anything? As far as I know, Fluttershy is qualified. Qualified enough for a tax write off, at least.
ouch dat foot
2661781
You could probably just say that RD made the call to NOT call Derpy in. actually, now that I think about it, you could make the claim that Derpy never qualified as part of the reservists, and that day when she damaged town hall had been the end result of the test for that. That actually explains a lot for me, as I had always been wondering just what the heck Derpy thought she had been doing there, but I could totally believe that she was going; "Oh god, I've screwed up my test sooo bad, nothing to do but push forward and hope it somehow all works out. Look see? Weather, I can do weather. Oh crap that looked like it almost hit Rainbow Dash. I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT WENT WRONG! Oh crap, lets try to gloss this over; NICE WORK RAINBOW DASH! Crap!"
Of course, for the winter wrap up thing, EVERYPONY is called in reservists or otherwise.
Also I still consider her name as Ditzy Doo, but Derpy is the nickname that Rainbow Dash came up with to express her annoyance with her, though only when she's talking to Derpy, not when she's talking to other ponies.
Hmmm... depending on how good Derpy is at spelling, Fluttershy could be in for some trouble. (Before the "reporter" gets in trouble for trying to sabotage the disaster-prevention effort, that is.
)
Hoo boy. There is always at least one "journalist" who thinks it's more important to stir up trouble than actually cover the news.
Jeez, poor Flitter.
2661520
Assuming he doesn't simply end up in trouble for attempting to smear a national hero.
Hah!
And oh my. At least it seems like nothing too bad happened with the fog.
Derpy!
Two things. First, sorry I never got to you on this chapter. I opened it near the start, didn't see anything wrong, left, and promptly forgot it existed.//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Derpy_Hooves.png This was also a pretty fast chapter turnover, so good on you!//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Derpy_dealwithit.png
Second, the problem I am seeing with the chapter is sadly something I would not be able to help FIX. //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Twilight_future.png As a whole, I kinda disagree with... the entirechapter, as crazy as it may seem. Before this there were some misanthropic moments in the story(pretty good ones, albeit), but this chapter reads as very "I hate everything about the world."
It opens with a lengthy description of Flitter's terrible, nightmarish injuries.
She'll live, but the best part is that it could've been worse, and at least she doesn't have to worry that she was doing her job improperly in the first place.//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Rainbow_Dash_lolface.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Fluttershy_lolface.png
The next scene was pretty much "Politics sucks," "Bipartisan Politics suck," "being a Politician sucks" and "being a Constituent sucks." And "the Media sucks," but really, that's just the icing on the cake.//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png
The final scene came as a real kicker. "Derpy's job sucks." Thank you. I needed Derpy to hate her life outside of her single ray of hope, Dinky. Oh, at least she isn't Flitter.//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Derpy_Hooves.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Vinyl2.png
Sorry if I seem caustic, my morning was bad and I didn't sleep right. I'll be with you for the next chapter. ta~
Thank god that Derpy is sending this message. Wonder what it is that will actually arrive at the other end. Although, you've gotten me quite curious as to what exactly it is that Fluttershy cheated on with that test, and if it is actually as heavy an offense as she thinks it is.
2662886 - I suppose I did let more of my natural cynicism filter into this one than usual. That said, I didn't think it was that bad. Flitter's going to make a full recovery, after all. (Though I perhaps could have made it clearer that the paperwork wouldn't have been considered fraudulent---the DOW's policy is that stuff like this is a judgement call on the part of whoever's in charge.)
Also, as one of my prereaders, you should already know that there are solid storytelling reasons why I had to have somepony get injured by the fog at this point in the narrative.
Yay! Another chapter.
I think the most likely reason overall for why Derpy isn't in the reserves is that she is (In this version I assume) a single parent so doesn't have the time or the money to afford a foalsitter for when training would occur (.
2663000
Yeah, I know. I even agreed with a lot of it before the fact. I'm just in a terrible mood right now and letting my own cynicism ruin the chapter. It really was good, just... not to my taste right now.
–Not only was this a reasonably well thought-out plan, but to Apple Bloom’s mild surprise, it seemed to work. Granted, there were a few close calls:
There appears to be a double space in between these sentences.
–“Back in my day, we were smart enough ta put pillows under our blankets so it looked like we were sleepin’ already.”
lol
–“Aw, I hate figures of speech,” the ball said weakly, looking slightly deflated.
This little line made me smile. :D
The appearance of Derpy was entertaining. Fun to see the dynamic between Pinkie and her aunt, as well!
If anything, I would say that Fluttershy is probably overqualified. That aside, Horse Code was awesome to the point of nearly being physically painful.
2661770
Well, I think that it was probably a choice between having Derpy... ...being Derpy during an important weather emergency, and leaving her to handle the post and telegraph office, a job she's generally recognized as being able to do competently.
The best she can do at this time is not get in the way of the Weather team, and hold the fort at the post office.
2661473
Hold on. She took the course, legitimately. She passed the course, legitimately. So in what way are her qualifications fraudulent?
Just because there has been little call for her expertise does not make her legitimately obtained accreditation fraudulent. The fact that she has been thrown into an unforseeable crisis caused by an incredible freak accident does not make HER a criminal (though it certainly reflects poorly on the superiors who dumped it on her!).... it is not a criminal offense to have minimal field experience.
2662991
I'm betting she'll get it completely backwards or send it to the wrong pony. I mean, Derpy/Ditzy is persistent and well-meaning, but sometimes she really messes things up.
2663274
It seems you are in fact correct, but she could still get into some trouble for the tax stuff.
The fact that she does not use her home for anything fog expert related, yet takes tax write offs for it, could be a problem. A problem a nosy reporter might dig up.
2663547
Well, the three letters she's sent so far are correct....
Poor Flitter, could have definitely been worse though.
After all, the treatment for broken pony legs here is a quick series of shots.
2663982 - That's actually why I named the mountain where it happened Mt. Barbaro. (At least, I'm pretty sure I remembered to mention that in the actual story...)
2663274 Not saying that her qualifications were fraudulent, just that the press might decide to run with that interpretation. Especially now that there's been a fairly serious on-the-job injury.
2663982 Treatment is the same in the mild west
2663681
Well, then, we'll see.
The return of Hard Hitler
2664207
Shots of
whiskeysalt water, right?I am fortunate that my stomach is a black hole. That link is... Eugh.
Compound fracture? Quick! Rub some dirt on it!
I quite liked Mayor Mare on realpolitik. I don't know, it's just kind of refreshing to see cynicism in ponies. Looking forward to more.
2661526
She was probably kicked off the reserve team after the incident with the thundercloud and City Hall. That was with normal weather. Can you even imagine what she could do with this fog?
Ouch, get well soon Flitter!
Wow, talk about narrowly cheating Death eh? Sounds serious but not fetal, I don't believe. DERPY!!!!!!!!! Love that mare, she really knows how to make stories entertaining
The scene with Pinkie and Mayor Mare was very well thought of, creative as can be, Apple Bloom's had me dying from laughter, honestly glad to see this update, wonder what Fluttershy has to go through next
.
> looks at image
> audible gasp
> source: self-photographed
> .........
> how did they manage to do that?
2663000
Good thing you made that clarification about the paper work here. I had gotten the impression that it was a rather corrupt thing to do (making tax-payers fund Flitter's recovery from injuries that were her own fault, just because she would otherwise be in a bind.)
2661744
FOG TSUNAMI!