• Member Since 7th Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen 11 hours ago

TheWraithWriter


Commissions are open, feel free to DM. Also maybe donate to my Ko-Fi https://ko-fi.com/thewraithwriter

Comments ( 5 )

Please tell me that Sunset WASN'T on the pill because I would just LOVE to see a sequel to this story in the future about the baby that they made.

She left her magazine where it was on the counter and followed Sunset outside. Sure enough there was a bike standing just next to the curb, a helmet resting on one of the handlebars. It was sleek [insert name of bike here], all black, shiny, and curvy. It was a beautiful machine and it almost made Aria green with envy to see Sunset Shimmer with it. Then she started thinking about Sunset laying on it and she started turning red instead.

Either that was a stylistic choice, or you forgot something here.

11169360
Darn it, it happened again. I knew there was a reason I get editors.

11169071
Potentially! It's really a matter of me having an idea for a sequel. Beyond the scene(s) of Aria and Sunset having pregnant sex.

I'm pissed I didn't write this.

Your Aria is a perfect balance, for me. She's still rough around the edges and a bit brash, but doesn't quite stray into being a parody of herself, every third word being a random F-bomb like a lot of people like to portray her. I also adore your Sunset, found her to be charming and engaging. Sex was fun, although I wish slightly more was made out of Aria's size and physique, but I acknowledge that I'm being a bit greedy.

My only other minor gripe is the idea that Sunset had been flirting with her from the start with the intention of fucking in the office. Now, I might be as dense as Aria, but if Shimmy was flirting, it definitely felt more like "let's go out for dinner" rather than "let's have a sloppy, inconsequential fuck". That's a minor issue though, didn't rob me of my enjoyment at all.

Thank you for your submission!

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