• Member Since 17th Apr, 2019
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

Omegafr


E

Story with Mane 6 in the Pony Academia, with 6 stalions on their sides.
It is in a new city, and at a reputable academy, that the group of girls must now live.

This story don't have links with My Hero Academia, like, no one except the similar title.

Luckily for them, the headmistress has asked a group of six boys to take care of their integration.

Ties will be quickly forged, strong friendships, lasting relationships, sometimes as a result of a tragic event, sometimes as should happen to normal high school students.

How is this year going to go?

It's happening here.

I'm looking forward to your feedback, both positive and negative as long as it's constructive ^^.

Chapters (20)
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Comments ( 11 )

Might wanna look into getting an editor for this fic. There's quite a few bits where the grammar seems off, and even though I'm familiar with MHA, this story feels... nonsensical. I don't really feel any pull or drive to connect to any of these PCs, so going by that, why would I necessarily want to care about what happens to them?

Try to make your characters a little more lively and relatable to the reader and/or people who like My Hero Acadamia, that's basically what I'm saying. :raritywink:

EDIT: Also, show, don't tell. You've got a lot of tell in this story, and there's a lot of description that doesn't seem to serve any purpose other than to describe what a character looks like regardless of whether or not their looks are actually relevant.

10210544
This fiction is NOT a crossover with MHA just for the title, it's a school story without superpower or something.
The story is just one chapter, you can't say it's not attractive, after if it's not tour style, you can just ignore it.
Ans sorry for fault, i'm french and i do my best to translate.

The long description could definitely use some work as well. Take a look at the descriptions of other stories on the site-- what do they do?

The point of the long (and short) descriptions is to get the reader interested in the story. What makes your story worth reading over anyone else's? People can tell from your cover art already that your characters are anthro, so telling them that they're anthro in the description is redundant and wastes space. Just add an anthro tag to the story, like mechgamer mentioned before.

So... Who's going to be Dabi?

10215144
This is not MHA crossover fanfic :pinkiehappy:

10216056
Might wanna make that a little clearer, then. The cover art suggests that the story is 100% a MHA crossover.

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