- Member Since 14th Oct, 2019
- offline last seen 3 hours ago
AndwhatIseeisme
I write stories mainly featuring small horses having sex with one another, and that is probably all you really need to know about me.
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Well it's about time to have a good Clop fic with Him in the story, greatly enjoyable, I hope this romance stuff continues on between the two of them.
*groan* That title kinda wrote the whole story, didn't it?
10118731
What? No, that's ridiculous. I have no idea what you mean.
I literally decided to write a story featuring Pistachio entirely for that pun.
I always imagined him being boytoy for Kerfuffle, Coco and Sassy, but Rarity herself not joining in on her disciples' retreats. It's bad for discipline and morale for the boss to join in.
10118873
I really dig Coco and Pistachio as a couple, in part because Coco feels like the closest to his age of the three. They also look similar enough to look cute together.
upvoted due to pun
might not actually read the fic, but who knows
I sure don't
Wonderful story with Pistachio.
Oh, and shouldn't "snout" be "muzzle"?
I do really love this pairing, and there’s su h a lack of it
This is your official review from Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
Remember to vote in the contest's poll -- voting closes at midnight, June 6th.
And make sure to allow notifications from the contest group and/or follow Dirty Little Secret to get the full results and the awards show post on June 9th!
------ Review ------
Please keep in mind, I know I can be overly critical and negative at times. I can always find something to nitpick, even in the greatest works of literature ever written. Please don't take it personally!
-Really quite hot, and while it is a bit rushed, it makes sense for it to be rushed because Pistachio doesn't have much endurance.
-Still, some parts of it could have benefitted from being drawn out more. For example, it would be fun to see Pistachio nut on her face while she's licking, before even taking him in her mouth, surprising her, and then her being slightly miffed about having cum in her hair, but shrugging it off after he apologizes profusely, and then the rest of her BJ is getting him back up for the main event.
-
overlooking the city, satin curtains framing the sun setting over the city.-- repetitive.-
"Wh-whoa," Pistachio's eyes widened as he entered the room, "this is amazing!"-- misuse of tag.-
if perhaps she's like to discuss-- need to give this one the 'd'.-
Needing to pull back a bit to breath,-- it's okay, we all run out of 'e's sometimes.-Clever title.
------ Scores ------
To clarify what these scores mean, check my judging rubric.
Cloppability: 89/100
Allure: 80/100
Enticement: 96/100
Immersion: 94/100
Prose Quality: 85/100
Total Score: 444/500
The more specialized scores for individual prizes, as well as the results of the community poll, will be published when the full results are announced. If this story wins any awards, there will be another post in the story comments sometime after June 9th announcing that this story has won.
Thank you for participating, and thank you for contributing to Fimfic's collection of clop!
How do you have so few followers? This is your fourth story in the contest to break 400/500. Are you an alt or something?
10247755
Thanks, basically this whole story was created around that pun, so I'm glad you liked it. Happy it got such a high score, too.
10248143
Nope, not an alt. This is my only account. I guess the follower count is relatively low because I'm still pretty new. Despite reading on this site for years, I only made the account and started writing after the show ended last fall. Still building that following, maybe scoring well in DLS's contest will bolster those numbers a bit. On the upside, it does put me in the running for the "best story by someone with less than 200 followers" award, so there are advantages to being unpopular sometimes.
10248249
So you have no writing experience at all until recently? Remarkable!
If you don't win the <200 follower award I'd be shocked. You've fared better than any other writer in this contest with the exception of Wintermist. I'm going to have to read this story and figure out what I did wrong on my clop scene.
Well I read it. If I've learned one thing it's that DLS and I have completely different standards for what makes a story good. The sexual descriptors are generic and I've no idea why Rarity is going to have sex with this guy. Hell, the guy doesn't even know why she's going to have sex with him we we can't just say all the messy relationship stuff happened off-camera. She's just like "whelp, let's see your cock".
I don't think I'm cut out for this style of writing at all. Time to crawl back into my obscure corner of fimfiction and do what I've been doing. Best of luck to you.
10248339
Congratulations on winning Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
For the full results, check the Dirty Little Award Show.
This story won:
i.imgur.com/shdgVcZ.png
Fetish Fuel: Foalcon
Just because they're young doesn't mean they can't have a little fun. Or a lot ... we’re not here to judge. Well, except for one judgment: your clopfic had the best scene involving at least one underage
foalcharacter.Well, at least you gave us the Pistachio clopfic we needed. Characters like him who have no tag and get little love need these. Great work.
This was nice.