This story is a sequel to Neocros: The Water Dragon
After the battle in Ponyville, life went back to business as usual. However, Neocros had managed to make a life of himself, with his friends. Recently Sam and Neocros haven’t been talking to each other much, which puts Neocros in to paranoia over whether or not he offended Sam or not. Sam’s birthday was a few months ago, but Neocros forgot to make him a party. Now he and Dash must make him a birthday party...
Set in Season 8. This is the canonical sequel to Neocros: The Water Dragon, even though this was released before that one, woops 
Special thanks to ZettaiDullahan for editing
Chapters (11)
At the beginning I was getting what is it called vibes? From cuddling is the best remedy. then I feel like it was it was a bit off a gap if it was me I would have written something that happened while there was sleeping. but that just me what do I know I never written a story and I’m probably never going to. I didn’t notice the gap you mentioned in your note so I let it slide. Anyway I think this start was ok. And can you help me remember your characters powers? I remember slaughter can make spider webs. Dark cold become a shadow or a gas. And silver was a scientist or a wizard. I can’t remember anyone else. Wasn’t there someone that had spiders as minions. And my friend told me to use more Garmer I think it was called. I think I did it really badly what do you think?
9826267
Admittedly, I had made the beginning a little while ago, while Samneo was still going. But by the time The Earth Pony was done, this beginning was already half way done, and so I just had to go with what I got. Also, as much as I like Cuddling is the Best Remedy, I wished I had done something more original.. but hopefully the next session will be a bit more original.
As for character powers. I believe Neocros(right now at least), has powers that are mostly water based. Dark actually DOESN’T become shadow, he uses Fire within his right hand, almost like a unicorn’s horn. Voss is the one who becomes a shadow. You got Slaughter right with being spider-like with his webs, but Silver is slightly off, in that, he’s a scientist, but not a wizard. To my knowledge, in this point in time, Silver doesn’t have any powers, Only his brains.
You mean Grammar? Yeah, I wish I was better at that. Hopefully the next one won’t be as grammarly faulty. What do you mean by I did it really badly?
9826768
I think it’s ok if you use small bits. But if your hole story is copied is then I don’t think it’s ok. In your case I think it was totally fair. And what I meant by bad at grammar is that I just started 4 days ago. before that almost never use it and I have also realized in English you use a lot differently then in Swedish. And by friends I meant my hole clan
9827329
Oh. I see
Well that was really delayed I just got an email that you commented on my comment 2 times
9834054
oh, sorry bout that..
Interesting choice to color-code the dialogue. I've never seen that before, but it makes a good amount of sense.
9838909
I’ve haven’t seen that many stories that color code, so I thought I’d do so for this, and possibly future stories.
Hi if you wonder why I haven’t reed the new chapter yet. its because I don’t want to read at the moment. I don’t really know why its like lost the taste. I think it will come back in a week or 2
9848926
alright, I’ll try to top myself
This is really interesting! It made a very nice read.
Dialogue and executions were a bit patchy at the beginning.. but toward the end, everything had straightened out.
There are spelling and grammatical errors, as I mentioned, like:
Could sound better as 'The ones who didn't volunteer with the school had gone to their own places.'
Otherwise, I enjoyed reading this! Color-coded dialogue lines were certainly... different, but I suppose they could have been for the better.
9878502
Thanks!
I’ve updated Prologue now, where the one line: ‘The ones who didn't volunteer with the school had gone to their own places.’ has replaced the old one. Thank you for the feedback!
UPDATE: Sudden Circumstances
I’ve added some more scenery, and made some scenes more in depth.
Here’s a little something I thought would be interesting.. Music for different scenes. I DO NOT OWN THIS MUSIC, IT BELONGS TO IT’S RIGHTFUL OWNERS, So just maybe imagine it as you read along.
Normal Battle BGM:
Neocros Light Mode BGM:
I’m back I feel a bit bad for leaving you for so long but at least I have 3 or 4 more chapters to catch up on now anyway how you been while I was away
9924619
Been feeling terrible, over things that aren’t in my control. Then, on the third, when I was suppose to help somebody, as well as maybe write the next chapter, my Wi-fi just gives up on me, forcing my parents to call the repair man. they’re suppose to arrive today in the daylight (I’m writing this at 2 am) however, my wi fi just mysteriously came back. I have no idea why, but I’ll do the best I can, while it’s still on.
992575i hope you’r WiFi get fixed soon. If you want to play a game or just have a chat in team speak or discord my door is open the only problem I see is that I’m in Sweden so I’m like 6 or 7 hours ahead of the us
9926129
My wi-fi’s back up, though I’ll keep an eye on it for a bit. If you wish to know my Discord, let me know. btw, What games you play?
(I don’t really have any multiplayer games, save for Team Fortress 2, and even then it’s laggy due to my laptop being a potato)
(Side note; your thoughts on this chapter?)
I don’t really know what to say about this one. At the start you learn about neo daily life and his thoughts. That there is something neo needs to get of his chest that I think you learn more about in the next chapter. I have taken a look in my steam library I have tf2 I just haft to download it the best game I see now is stardew valley it’s a farming game that you can also mine and fight monsters and I think you could play it on a pc from 2006 the only problem is that it will cost you like 10 tp 15 euro if you don’t have it. best free to play game for you pc I see is a game called unturned but I have played so much of it that I’m that I get really easily if I play it
9926742
alright
I fell asleep while was reading and now I’m can’t remember anything I read so I haft to finish some time later
Hi um my mother board died so I can’t read any right now I’m on xbox the really annoying thing is that the browser will crash every 30 min so I’m been listening to fanfics on YouTube instead and I don’t have a smartphone I sold it because I wasn’t using it so now I have a old Nokia
9947692
I’m sorry about your mother board. I have one for my upcoming PC Build, and I’m worried for the motherboard.
How does Xbox browser even work?
You have a mouse that you control with a joystick it’s really annoying to scroll up and down and the sites takes forever to load and it crashes a lot
9949856
I’m so sorry.. I hope you’ll be able to get a new motherboard soon...
What was so bad about the previous story?
9979895
Well... I didn’t really like it, to be honest. Though it was meant to be canonical to this story, I felt that The Earth Pony was dead from the start. I also had someone review the story, which you can find here.
it was ok i dont really know what to say about it
9986149
I see.. thank you
i fund this one a cute and heart worming. one thing i used the robot voice to read the story for me and when the bot trys to say neocros it sound like negro. anyway i find it a bit intresting to god jul/marry cristmas
9991755
Thank you! Marry Christmas too!
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/213901/my-little-reviews-feedback/thread/427394/neocros-adventures-review
Reviewed.
Has writers block struck you again?
10104092
Unfortunately yes. It has
10104113
Yea I know the feeling now I have spent an hour now looking at a page trying to think of what to write
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/168984b9-b8ec-4215-81d4-7c2f9bec6a9f/ddvjoe1-f8c8afec-0056-4c96-8d3f-6b329bdb5a31.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzE2ODk4NGI5LWI4ZWMtNDIxNS04MWQ0LTdjMmY5YmVjNmE5ZlwvZGR2am9lMS1mOGM4YWZlYy0wMDU2LTRjOTYtOGQzZi02YjMyOWJkYjVhMzEucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.zw9xfvRKQRLPI60xiIYeMUEYmCuzglTLYar6Z51acys
Notice something different?
just read this again to refresh my memory and is something wrong why do you look so sad in your profile picture
10368080
Well.. had it on for a few weeks, I'm surprised somebody noticed--almost all of July in fact...
to answer your question.. it's too personal.
ok well i hope you feel beter soon maybe try and read cuddleing is the best remedy or the real you by DivineRoyalty it always cheer me up when im feeling down anyway i hope for you to get loads of dashie sunggles
sorry it took me so long im been fealing a bit down and havnt felt like reading anyway it was ok i felt a embarrssed in the Slaughter part and dont know why but i really like the name of the capter
i dont really like that hes mind soul?or who ever he speaks to in hes dreams basically tells him you most have sex with woman to get powerful and save equestria mostly because i dont want this to become porn for me thats not engof to justify sex i would have felt like it was fine without this part becase thay have been dating for a while and get to know each oder but that lane just pull me in the wrong wrongway so im just going to pretend that he never siad that
and is there eny difrence between a normal dragon then a water dragon to me form reading this it fells like a water dragon id more link to a snake then a um ödla i cant rember the word in english -lizard- is the word
10426766
I can understand being embarrassed over Slaughter's portion, since to be honest he's probably the second weakest character I have in my arsenal. However, I plan to have him receive an arc where he becomes a bit more serious, but I don't know when I'll get to that arc.
As for the possibility of sex, don't worry, the actual sex scene won't happen in this story, I'll be making a separate fic for that, so it won't get in the way of this story, but it will be canon. I can promise this won't turn into a porn fest afterwards.
Neocros and Dash have been dating, but they haven't engaged in sex, solely because of the contractors(edit: world enforcers). There will be an explanation for why the water dragon has to do it now, and it'll come once I've made it.
I don't know what you mean by water dragon and snake. If you mean the part where Neocros wraps Dash with his long tail, then it's mainly because he has a tail that's a bit longer than his body.
EDIT: I checked again, and found that one sentence was a little off, and didn't seem to make it clear it's his tail that's wrapping and not his whole body, so I've patched it and now it's a bit more explicit.
In case anyone's wondering, Neocros' pose in the coverart is meant to reference to Kingdom Hearts 2.
sorry that it took me so long to read this anyway it was good i ike how you protray a villain going in to good side thats all i have time for im going to reed the next chapter when i get home from work
ok this was really good i dont know waht to say really i have no complains
i felt a little enbarced at the start when dashie was trying on undergarments im going to say that its really well writen there because it made me feel
aah now that qulity this flow trough perfectly i really wish for you to secced and curius of what comes next have a good day
10701146
Thank you!
im not a fan of pokemon so what is a rattata a rat with a long tail and big teeth? the only ones i know is the yellow squerl or what ever it is dont know the name and there is like a orange dragon with a burning tail i think that one is called pikatsu or something like that some turtle with a plant on its back and a big fat guy that sleeps i think i have seen a flying fish to
11060725
Rattata