Easy Access, the Story of Quill

by Graphite Quill

The First Episode

Its happening, the first major event that starts Twilight's great adventure. Nightmare Moon has returned and all is quiet in the darkness of the late morning. Canterlot is surprisingly empty of ponies right now, nopony is willing to leave their homes in fear of being harmed by whatever is causing the mid-day darkness. I woke up fairly early to an odd feeling in my head and my boss freaking the fuck out about it still being dark. Ms.Binding tried to get me to stay inside but I left anyway knowing that it would be safe enough here, the real danger was happening in Ponyville or rather the Everfree Forest. I always wondered what the fuck Princess Celestia was doing during all this and I intended to find out. Even as I walked down the street past guard stations I didn't see a single guard, or civilian. This could either mean they are all hiding, or they are all on guard at the castle protecting the princess. If this were a different world I'd bet on the latter but with ponies you never know, Some days they're brave, other days they hide from their own shadow.

Considering how the rest of the city was a ghost town I was actually fairly surprised when I found a pony outside the front gates of the castle sitting with a painting easel and partially painted canvas. The mare had light grey fur and a yellow/blond mane with two purple steaks. She honestly kind of reminded me of an earth pony version of Derpy, Ponyvilles mail mare.

Without looking the mare spoke over her shoulder in a deadpan voice. "You will not get if you are here for an appointment. The guards have barred the door in case of an attack." She then turned to look at me with a look of boredom and said, "However if you are intent to continue to stare at me then you will quickly find out how little there is to see."

These types of people have always intrigued me, they either have little to no emotion or just don't show it like others do. I have to wonder if this one is related to Maud Pie in any way. "Well I was actually planning to go talk to Princess Celestia but I think I'd rather stay just to talk to you. After all a pretty mare like yourself needs somepony to keep you company."

"No actually I do not need company, that is after all why I chose this strange midday darkness to come out and paint the castle. However I don't care what you do with your time as long as you keep your flirtation to yourself and keep interruptions to a minimum." With that she returned to her painting with the brush held in her hoof.. How in the hell does that work? It's a hoof! There's nothing to grip with, it just shouldn't be possible.

"How are you doing that? I've always wondered how ponies hold stuff with their hooves."

"You are a unicorn. You can use magic so why does this," She held up the brush "even matter to you?"

"I'm just curious is all. I've never been able to get it to work." Just like my forehead growth I haven't been able to pick anything up except with my mouth. Which is disgusting by the way, books taste horrible.

She stopped painting and looked back at me with the same blank expression as before. "It is not that hard to do. Here, try to take the brush."

I decided to give it a shot even though I already know whats going to happen. I walked over reaching out to grab the brush, concentrating on trying to activate whatever the fuck kind of magic allows ponies to do the impossible, and watched as it promptly hit the ground. Fuck magic, this shit just does not work.

"You are trying way too hard. Just pick it up, don't think about it just do it." She then grabbed another brush and continued to paint as if I weren't there. I decided to leave the mare be to finish her painting in peace. Any time somepony other than my boss talks about how easy magic is it just pisses me off because I'm not a regular pony and it's not easy for me. I've tried just about everything I could think of from movies, books, and even MLP fan fictions but still can't figure this shit out.

I wandered around near the castle looking for an alternate way in that wasn't being guarded but I gotta say this place is pretty much impenetrable, unless you can fly that is. Believe it or not somepony left a window wide open next to a balcony. Not that it helps me any, damn that lucky bastard thief and his wings. Since the castle is on lockdown and nothing is open I'm only left with one option. Back to the library for me.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

My boss hugged me. It had been about 4 hours since I had woken up when I made it back to the library and she was apparently very worried. I sometimes forget how hyperemotional and touchy-feely these ponies are, I mean we barely know each other and yet she almost cried with joy when she saw that I was unharmed. When she asked about what is happening outside I told her about everything that I saw, which was basically nothing, and even the earth pony painter. She laughed when hearing about the conversation I had with the painter, and then even more when I mentioned the part about how frustrated I was that I couldn't do something so 'simple' as picking up stuff with my hoof.

"I was wondering why you always used your mouth for everything, you really can't use magic at all can you. I really don't know what to tell you, nearly all ponies are able to use their hooves like that from birth. You're an odd pony Graphite."

"You don't know the half of it." I grumbled as I headed back to the room I'm staying in for the time being. Just as I was about to open the door to my room something strange happened. The air just started, I don't know, vibrating? Pulsing? It was fucking weird.

"GRAPHITE! Was that you?!?" I could hear my boss yell in surprise. I turned to see her coming around the corner towards me at a surprising speed for a mare her age. "That was a strong magic pulse. Did you do that? "

"No but I felt that. Wait look." I said gesturing with my head towards the window. "The sun is rising again. She did it." We looked outside to see the sun rise to its normal position. I'll have to ask the Princess what went down on the off chance I somehow changed the story line.

-=-=-=-=-=-The Next Day=-=-=-=-=-

There's a big event going on in Canterlot later to welcome Princess Luna back into power, and I'm not missing this. I need to see Luna in person or rather in pony I guess. I doubt I will ever get the chance to talk to her but hey, a stallion can dream right? The boss is coming as well which is why we are leaving so early to give us plenty of time to get there and find a good spot. Nothing really happened on the way there and my boss was mostly quiet so I spent the time wondering whats going to happen during this event. This is all new to me, though it wasn't really a surprise when I got the invitation. This was never in the show so I'm back to not knowing whats happening until the Grand Galloping Gala which is no big deal to me since I'm avoiding the episodes.

Speaking of the gala, yes I plan on going. Why? So I watch the chaos of coarse! How am I getting a ticket? Um.. Beg Celestia? Fuck if I know, I'm not noble nor do I have the money to afford something like a ticket for such an event. I might just sneak in, it should be easy enough if I wait until the shit starts hitting the fan. Anyways one thing at a time it will be a while before that comes up.

We arrived at the castle to see the outside area decked out with decorations related to the moon and stars along with banners that have Luna's cutie mark embroidered onto them. I left my boss to find us a couple of seats while I explored the castle grounds. Since there's an event going on guards only kept people from the castle itself allowing everyone to roam free so I'm taking advantage of the situation. I'm hoping to make nice with some of the staff for informational purposes considering that they usually overhear important meetings, and they might let some helpful info slip during conversation. I like to be prepared in case shits about to go down so finding a way to get info directly from the castle would be awesome.

So far everypony has been rushing around getting things prepared or helping other guests and I haven't been able to talk to any of the workers for more than a minute. It seemed pointless to keep trying at the time. Though not long after I started heading back to my boss I heard a voice I wasn't expecting. "Dude! What are you doing here?!"

I turned to see, I shit you not, Thief standing behind me wearing a full set of royal guards armor. Who the fuck let this guy join the guard, and why the fuck did they let this guy carry a short sword?! I just stared dumbfounded until an idea popped into my head. "You didn't steal that armor did you?" I said.

"Really? That's the first thing you say to me when you see me." He said with a scowl shaking his head. "No. It was given to me yesterday morning when I got caught sneaking into the castle. Now before you start, I was not trying to steal anything I was getting Gilda out of trouble. She was arrested for being on the Princess's balcony when the sun didn't rise yesterday."

"So you broke Gilda out of captivity after she was getting ready to steal something. OK whatever, but that still doesn't explain how you were 'given' armor."

"The captain gave me the armor because I managed to slip into a window and get Gilda out without anyone noticing other than him. He caught me just as we were leaving and offered me a spot in the special guard doing missions that require secrecy. I asked why he would offer me that and he said it was, and I quote, 'amazing that you managed to get past the best of the best without anypony knowing.' After that I asked about the pay, about shit myself at the wage, then accepted the offer, and now here I am."

I swear this mother fucker is cheating, first he can fly therefor use some magic and now he was given a high paying job after BREAKING INTO A CASTLE! This world must hate me. I can't use magic, work at a library, and have to use my mouth to carry stuff because I can't even do simple stuff that foals can do. I blame magic.

Comments

[NotSuspicious366]

Speaking of the gala, yes I plan on going. Why? So I watch the chaos of coarse! How am I getting a ticket? Um.. Beg Celestia? Fuck if I know, I'm not noble nor do I have the money to afford something like a ticket for such an event. I might just sneak in, it should be easy enough if I wait until the shit starts hitting the fan. Anyways one thing at a time it will be a while before that comes up.

That shouldn't be that hard with their level of technology, especially since any dumbass with a printer can sneak into an expo nowadays.

[tsaukpaetra]

Convenient. Now ask him his name!

[f0st3r21]

The thief’s little side story is amazing.